Do you have a video? a testimony? a poem, or something else you'd like to share on the Patch? Simply email us at: [email protected]
Hi, my name is Daniela, and this is my salvation story…
I grew up in this church, so I have always lived in a Christian home. From an early age, I knew what it meant to be saved and always had a good relationship with God. I loved Him and knew that I had to follow and trust Him in everything. When I was about 11 years old, I asked God to give me His Holy Spirit with the evidence of ‘speaking in tongues’, then I tried to receive the Holy Spirit out of my strength, but somehow, I knew it was not the right time for me to get saved yet.
A few years later I realized it is not something that, once I think I’m ready I can simply ‘just take’ my salvation and a new prayer language from God, but that it is a gift (Ephesians 2:8). Once God knows I’m ready He will give it to me – if I am seeking! (Luke 11:9-13)
One Sunday night my Mum and Dad were ‘praying in tongues’ in our living room and I had this urge from God to go and join them. Once Dad noticed me, he asked me what I wanted, I said I would like to be saved, and I had tears streaming down my face the whole time. I asked God again for His Holy Spirit to come into me and save me – and He did. I had a wonderful peace then, though the tears kept streaming down my face. Dad then told me to try and speak ‘in tongues and l did. Very slowly I started. At first just syllables and then a bit more. That night I could hardly sleep; I was so happy and full of joy and peace!
The next Wednesday, when our church house group had another meeting, I was baptized fully underwater, in a bathtub, as the Bible says (Acts 22:16), and am now a ‘new creature’ living for Jesus! (2 Corinthians 5:17)
I grew up in this church, so I have always lived in a Christian home. From an early age, I knew what it meant to be saved and always had a good relationship with God. I loved Him and knew that I had to follow and trust Him in everything. When I was about 11 years old, I asked God to give me His Holy Spirit with the evidence of ‘speaking in tongues’, then I tried to receive the Holy Spirit out of my strength, but somehow, I knew it was not the right time for me to get saved yet.
A few years later I realized it is not something that, once I think I’m ready I can simply ‘just take’ my salvation and a new prayer language from God, but that it is a gift (Ephesians 2:8). Once God knows I’m ready He will give it to me – if I am seeking! (Luke 11:9-13)
One Sunday night my Mum and Dad were ‘praying in tongues’ in our living room and I had this urge from God to go and join them. Once Dad noticed me, he asked me what I wanted, I said I would like to be saved, and I had tears streaming down my face the whole time. I asked God again for His Holy Spirit to come into me and save me – and He did. I had a wonderful peace then, though the tears kept streaming down my face. Dad then told me to try and speak ‘in tongues and l did. Very slowly I started. At first just syllables and then a bit more. That night I could hardly sleep; I was so happy and full of joy and peace!
The next Wednesday, when our church house group had another meeting, I was baptized fully underwater, in a bathtub, as the Bible says (Acts 22:16), and am now a ‘new creature’ living for Jesus! (2 Corinthians 5:17)
This last year has been the worst and best year of my life. I had been struggling in a lot of areas in my life. But about halfway through last year God worked in my life. By regularly checking in on the Patch, talking with Pastor Glenn, and building a network of godly support, I’ve come to total surrender and total dependence on God to live a Victorious Christ-filled life. Since then, by his grace and strength, I have seen several strongholds fall that I thought I could never gain victory over. I know the battle is just beginning but by his Grace and through his strength I know I can have Victory!
-Jeremy, Auckland New Zealand
Thought I'd share my testimony today❤️
Most of y'all didn't know this, but in late August, I was diagnosed with arthritis. In my back, knees, legs and ankles. Right from there, it was a downward spiral. I was constantly in pain and had to be placed on medication and started recommended workouts, heat and ice therapy, which didn't help. Mostly accompanied with inflammation and numbness, the burning pain wasn't easy to bear. At times I had to be laid up in bed, all day. All through September and October, it was stressful. Couldn't walk long distance, and couldn't stay in a car for a long journey. Things got terrible in early November, when the pain became excruciating and I couldn't sit for long, couldn't stand for long, couldn't lay down, couldn't do anything. I was mostly in tears and wanted to die. The pain was killing, and I was placed on heavy pain meds, therapy and put under observation. The pain meds didn't do any good. I started feeling this bloated spot beneath my ribs and horrible pain in my tummy. Most of my texts during that time was while I was in pain and crying (all those fake "I'm good" messages were far from good)
On the 12th November, I got mad at the devil and went to war for my health. He had always succeeded in putting me in emotional pain but when he saw I got freed from that, he tried to use physical pain. I decided I had to use the authority Jesus has given to me. Because by His stripes I'm healed. You know what?
Minutes after-
THE PAIN DISAPPEARED ‼️
ARTHRITIS DISAPPEARED ‼️
THE BLOATED SPOT DISAPPEARED ‼️
Today, I'm pain free. I've been living life since the past few weeks like nothing happened. Pain is gone, forever. I've been off pain meds for TWO WEEKS! Which won't have been possible except for God.🙌❤️✝️
Here I am, to give all the glory to God. I'm set free, and free indeed.💜
The devil thought he won, but JESUS PROVED HIM WRONG! 🛡️🙌🔥❤️
If He healed me, He can heal you too❤️✝️
This is all for you, Jesus.🧎🏼♀️💚
Lorianne
#Bands like ‘Sick of It All’, ‘Suicidal Tendencies’, ‘Pro-Pain’, ‘Slayer’, ‘Metallica’, ‘Congress’, ‘Slipknot’ – they were my heroes. At the age of fourteen, I was not allowed to go to a ‘Metallica’ concert and because of this I messed up a whole year at school and I hated my parents. My rebellion probably started earlier, but after this event it only became worse. I started to hate everybody and everybody was to blame, except for me.
I would ‘bang my head’ to the music for a while
Between the age of seventeen and eighteen I calmed down a bit after realizing that my behavior was not helping me. Slowly I got to know more and more people and thought I was doing quite well. However, when something went wrong or I felt unhappy for whatever reason, I would ‘bang my head’ to the music for a while which made me feel better again. I loved going to metal concerts and festivals: looking for sex, drugs and Rock ‘n’ Roll, and got caught up in the socio-political lyrics from bands like ‘SOIA’, ‘Pro-Pain’, or ‘Congress’, thinking we could change the world through this music. I was convinced; I was doing the right thing.
Then, in January 2000, I had the opportunity to go to London for my internship. During the Easter break I decided to head home for a couple of days. At Victoria Coach Station I asked a young man for some help. He was waiting for the same bus as me. We started talking about all sorts of things, the economy, school, Holland and the UK. But spoke intensively about war. He knew a lot about this subject, especially the politics behind it all. In the music I listened to they talked a lot about war; the war inside my head, or mandatory suicide, but that was largely due to frustration and unbelief.
I had a different idea about most Christians
In Holland, we exchanged e-mail addresses, even though I realized that this “crazy” Scotsman was a Christian. At home I asked my mum for her Bible (she must have thought I was mocking her) and I started searching for some of things the Scotsman had mentioned. Back in London, I realized I had somehow lost interest in listening to Ozzy or AC/DC. I got in contact with this Christian guy again and we met a couple of times. Somehow, I started asking him questions. It was great to see that he was normal, as I had a different idea about most Christians.
We got along quite well and he invited me to Scotland. Still very skeptical about his Christian life, I thought I’d take advantage of the situation and have him show me around Scotland a bit…
When we visited Edinburgh Castle, he was telling me a bit about history and how Scotland was once a Christian nation. This could be seen inside the castle, especially in the War Memorial Chapel. When we entered the castle, my initial thoughts were “great, but not very special.” But then we walked in to the shrine where a replica of the Ark of the Covenant with the archangel Michael hanging over it can be seen. There, I felt a heavy weight on my shoulders, like I was carrying somebody. I felt dirty and sinful. This feeling had to go!
Later, I decided to go along to one of their meetings. Amazingly, despite my expectations, the people were normal, we were not in a church-like building, just in a big beautiful house, and they did not make me feel pressured in any way (which would otherwise most probably have made me run).
Exposing Satan in my mind and in the Rock Music
The meeting was quite different from anything I could remember from my Catholic childhood. It was full of life. Soon the pastor started talking about a book where Satan is depicted as a sly creature that works in your mind, just like with Eve and the forbidden fruit. This was so real to me. I thought he was talking to me personally. One thing was clear to me, all these years I had allowed Satan in my mind, through the music, through the occult and just by living a rebellious, selfish life.
Later they sang a chorus: “The gates of hell shall not prevail against the army of the Lord” and this stuck with me again. I suddenly realized that everything about God and Satan is real and I was on the wrong track. I almost started crying, something I hadn’t done for many years. On the 28th of May 2000 I repented and decided to give my life to Jesus, just like in ACTS 2:38.
Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God…1 CORINTHIANS 2:12-14. I can honestly say that the spirit of this world (which is of Satan) is behind this music. Rock ‘n’ Roll and most of the pop music is so dangerous, because it works on a subconscious level, and you cannot spiritually discern what is going on or how it is influencing you. By the grace of God, He saved me from this.
- Calvin, Australia
I would like to share my testimony of how God drew me to Him, and how I became a born-again Christian.
I grew up in a non-religious family. We only went to church at Christmas, and I can’t remember even one word being spoken about God between us family members. In spite of this, I always had a certain interest in God and the Bible. Sometimes I prayed, and at the age of 9 or 10 visited the church now and again together with a classmate.
When I became a teenager, I forgot all about God and became attracted to things which God had forbidden. I only turned to God when I needed something, which is wrong in itself, but He seemed to faithfully answer my prayers and I realized again that He existed.
For example, I was diagnosed with insomnia, and I found healing and relief from praying to God. I also felt drawn to the Bible in some way, and wanted to find out whether or not it really was the Word of God. It was then that I developed the habit of opening the Bible and reading the first verse my eyes fell upon. From this practice I can recall three very important verses which I read over the course of time at different points in my life. The written Word of God spoke to my heart and conscience, and without my realizing it, started to turn my life around.
The first scripture was: So, thou, O son of man, I have set thee a watchman unto the house of Israel; therefore, thou shalt hear the word at my mouth, and warn them from me. When I say unto the wicked, O wicked man, thou shalt surely die; if thou dost not speak to warn the wicked from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at thine hand. (EZEKIEL 33:7-8)
I read these two verses after joining an evening at a local church youth group, when all the teenagers (including myself) refused to read the Bible together. We were quite defiant and only wanted to do “fun” things. The poor leader of the group! When I came home, I knew that I was wrong and that I had just denied the little faith which was in me. There was no doubt that this scripture was for me, and I somehow knew that I should speak up for God as indicated in these verses.
The second scripture was: Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in there at: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. (MATTHEW 7:13-14)
Finally, the third scripture was: And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire. (REVELATION 20:15)
Both the second and third scriptures made me feel very uncomfortable. I was wondering whether or not I was on the right path. I got the idea that I was not right with God and that there were consequences for living apart from His will.
A little while later, aged 16, I had just moved to another town and asked my brother if he knew of a Christian Church or Bible Study Group. He couldn’t give me a satisfactory answer, but the next day I found myself wandering through Munich city center when I bumped into a lady who gave me a Christian leaflet. We had a discussion for the next two hours, ended up exchanging telephone numbers, and later I attended a meeting.
I attended the next three meetings, and firstly I must say I was impressed by the sincerity of this joyful bunch of normal-looking young people who individually used their Bibles to answer my questions, and seemed to have personal faith in a Holy God. Secondly, I saw the phenomenon of speaking in tongues in action, as recorded in the Bible (ACTS 2:4; MARK 16:17). Through this I saw evidence of a miracle-working God.
Looking back to this time, I have to admit that I posed some very critical questions, as I tried to find a reason to go my own way. In other words, somehow, I hoped that there was no God. I liked my lifestyle, and was trying to avoid having to face the consequences of being a sinner before God. By the way, this sort of attitude is also detailed in the Bible because mankind’s natural mindset is against our Creator (ROMANS 8:7; GALATIANS 5:17).
At exactly this same time I met a very charming, nice guy on a dance floor who I started dating. As you can imagine this relationship was tempting me away from the Commandments of God’s Word! However, something was working inside me, and drew me in the right direction. After meeting him a few times I cancelled the next date which was on a Saturday evening, with the reasoning that” God is against it”.
Yet I also cancelled attending the Christian meeting on Sunday, to give myself a break and some space and to enjoy the nice weather. But, on the contrary, I had no peace at all on that particular Sunday! I couldn’t relax, and all entertainment seemed meaningless. Finally, I grabbed my Bible, opened it and my eyes fell on the following verses:
I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.
So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.
Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked:
I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eye salve, that thou mayest see.
As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne.
He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches. (REVELATION 3:15-22)
This scripture struck me like a thunderbolt and brought me under total conviction of God’s truthful Holy Word. It felt as if this Word was only written for me. I just knew: today is the day of salvation (2 CORINTHIANS 6:2). Without telling anybody, I took the train to the place where the meeting was held, but on arrival I found out that I had forgotten to take along the telephone number. I had no idea where to go! Then God performed a little miracle. I never knew the telephone number by heart, having only dialed it a few times, but the right numbers came easily to my mind and I made the call resulting in me getting through to the right people!
I had already decided to get saved the way the Bible – God’s Word – describes. That same day I received the Holy Spirit by the laying on of hands, and was baptized by full immersion (ACTS 2:37-39). When I came out of the water, the new language I had just received came out of my mouth powerfully. What an experience! I felt so clean, and – as the scripture says – as a new creature in Christ.
Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. (2 CORINTHIANS 5:17)
Then my walk as a Christian began. From that moment on I read the Bible with a totally new understanding, which is given by the Holy Spirit within us, who reveals the truth to us (1 CORINTHIANS 2:11-12; JOHN 16:13).
Over all the years that I have been saved I can testify that God has always been faithful and good towards me, without me deserving it. He has directed my path and has blessed me in many ways, and has protected me from the evil of this world. It is as the scripture says:
It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth. (Lamentations 3:27) In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (PROVERBS 3:6)
Vroni, Switzerland
This is a testimony of how God saved me from a life of hypocrisy, sickness and New Age philosophy.
At the age of 16, I was an active member of the Lutheran church. Despite this, I was heavily involved in astrology, yoga and other New Age practices. I knew several “white witches” and was often tempted to go further and try things like “moving glasses”. Unfortunately, I was never warned by any of the other church members or by my pastor about the spiritual danger of these things and I was even invited to a yoga seminar by one of our deacons. I was also taught in school during religious education classes not to take the Bible seriously. Nevertheless, I found that something or someone stopped me from getting involved in more serious occult practices, like “moving glasses” or talking to the dead.
I led a fairly normal teenage life. I went to parties and did other teenage things and yet I grew more and more unhappy. This unhappiness was especially apparent on Sundays, when I had to read from the Bible for Sunday school. I felt that something was awfully wrong in my life. There was a big difference between the things that happened in my own life and in my church and what I read about in the Bible. I felt empty and dirty. I tried to compensate for these feelings by becoming more active in the church. I also got involved in conservation groups and other similar causes, but nothing really satisfied me.
After taking part in a seminar for future youth group leaders held by my church, I got a big shock and decided to leave. The seminar lasted for almost a week and many strange things happened during this time like drug abuse (In one room it was so bad that you got affected just by walking in there!), promiscuity, and experimenting with quite a few esoteric methods like autogenic training. Although I did not have a lot of biblical knowledge I was quite upset about the whole situation. On top of that, one of the seminar leaders tried to rape me. After that I gave up on the idea of being in a “Christian” group.
The seminar lasted for almost a week and many strange things happened…
A short while later, after another one of my relationships broke up, I cried out to God to help me and show me how to lead a more fulfilled, healthy and better life. The many disappointments I had experienced with the church and my ex-boyfriends made it difficult for me to trust anyone. I was often depressed and had no inner peace. I also had low blood pressure (I had fainted a few times) and motion sickness.
The Lord answered my prayer by sending me a genuine Christian woman who told me about the Holy Spirit. I had never heard of this before and was very surprised that God still does great miracles today. I still had doubts, but soon realized her absolute sincerity and enthusiasm was something I had never seen before with other “so-called Christians”. At the same time, I started to realize how hypocritical I was. I realized I had completely missed out on developing a proper relationship with God because I had not taken His Word seriously.
After this I was unable to forget what I had been told about the power of the Holy Spirit and how this could transform a person from the inside out. After several days I decided to call the woman who gave me the tract. I can still remember sitting in front of the phone and praying:” Lord, if this isn’t a cult and you are leading me there then let this woman answer the phone immediately!” …And she did!
Lord… let this woman answer the phone immediately!” …And she did!
A short time later I went along to a house meeting with the Christian lady. From the beginning I felt like I was “at home” and I listened curiously while the others were praying in the Spirit. A deep conviction of sin, Godly fear and a desire “to make things right with God” grew within me and I prayed to God and surrendered my life to Him. “If this is the right place for me, LORD, and the place where You want me to be, then please give me the same gift!” Soon after, I received the Holy Spirit and started speaking in another tongue as described in the Book of ACTS.
I was baptized the very next day in a swimming pool and I really felt the burden dropping from my heart. From that moment on, I was healed from depression, my low blood pressure and my motion sickness. The Lord healed my “wounds of mistrust”, gave me inner peace, eternal life, and much more!
Praise the Lord!!
I grew up in a non-religious family. We only went to church at Christmas, and I can’t remember even one word being spoken about God between us family members. In spite of this, I always had a certain interest in God and the Bible. Sometimes I prayed, and at the age of 9 or 10 visited the church now and again together with a classmate.
When I became a teenager, I forgot all about God and became attracted to things which God had forbidden. I only turned to God when I needed something, which is wrong in itself, but He seemed to faithfully answer my prayers and I realized again that He existed.
For example, I was diagnosed with insomnia, and I found healing and relief from praying to God. I also felt drawn to the Bible in some way, and wanted to find out whether or not it really was the Word of God. It was then that I developed the habit of opening the Bible and reading the first verse my eyes fell upon. From this practice I can recall three very important verses which I read over the course of time at different points in my life. The written Word of God spoke to my heart and conscience, and without my realizing it, started to turn my life around.
The first scripture was: So, thou, O son of man, I have set thee a watchman unto the house of Israel; therefore, thou shalt hear the word at my mouth, and warn them from me. When I say unto the wicked, O wicked man, thou shalt surely die; if thou dost not speak to warn the wicked from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at thine hand. (EZEKIEL 33:7-8)
I read these two verses after joining an evening at a local church youth group, when all the teenagers (including myself) refused to read the Bible together. We were quite defiant and only wanted to do “fun” things. The poor leader of the group! When I came home, I knew that I was wrong and that I had just denied the little faith which was in me. There was no doubt that this scripture was for me, and I somehow knew that I should speak up for God as indicated in these verses.
The second scripture was: Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in there at: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. (MATTHEW 7:13-14)
Finally, the third scripture was: And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire. (REVELATION 20:15)
Both the second and third scriptures made me feel very uncomfortable. I was wondering whether or not I was on the right path. I got the idea that I was not right with God and that there were consequences for living apart from His will.
A little while later, aged 16, I had just moved to another town and asked my brother if he knew of a Christian Church or Bible Study Group. He couldn’t give me a satisfactory answer, but the next day I found myself wandering through Munich city center when I bumped into a lady who gave me a Christian leaflet. We had a discussion for the next two hours, ended up exchanging telephone numbers, and later I attended a meeting.
I attended the next three meetings, and firstly I must say I was impressed by the sincerity of this joyful bunch of normal-looking young people who individually used their Bibles to answer my questions, and seemed to have personal faith in a Holy God. Secondly, I saw the phenomenon of speaking in tongues in action, as recorded in the Bible (ACTS 2:4; MARK 16:17). Through this I saw evidence of a miracle-working God.
Looking back to this time, I have to admit that I posed some very critical questions, as I tried to find a reason to go my own way. In other words, somehow, I hoped that there was no God. I liked my lifestyle, and was trying to avoid having to face the consequences of being a sinner before God. By the way, this sort of attitude is also detailed in the Bible because mankind’s natural mindset is against our Creator (ROMANS 8:7; GALATIANS 5:17).
At exactly this same time I met a very charming, nice guy on a dance floor who I started dating. As you can imagine this relationship was tempting me away from the Commandments of God’s Word! However, something was working inside me, and drew me in the right direction. After meeting him a few times I cancelled the next date which was on a Saturday evening, with the reasoning that” God is against it”.
Yet I also cancelled attending the Christian meeting on Sunday, to give myself a break and some space and to enjoy the nice weather. But, on the contrary, I had no peace at all on that particular Sunday! I couldn’t relax, and all entertainment seemed meaningless. Finally, I grabbed my Bible, opened it and my eyes fell on the following verses:
I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.
So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.
Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked:
I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eye salve, that thou mayest see.
As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.
Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne.
He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches. (REVELATION 3:15-22)
This scripture struck me like a thunderbolt and brought me under total conviction of God’s truthful Holy Word. It felt as if this Word was only written for me. I just knew: today is the day of salvation (2 CORINTHIANS 6:2). Without telling anybody, I took the train to the place where the meeting was held, but on arrival I found out that I had forgotten to take along the telephone number. I had no idea where to go! Then God performed a little miracle. I never knew the telephone number by heart, having only dialed it a few times, but the right numbers came easily to my mind and I made the call resulting in me getting through to the right people!
I had already decided to get saved the way the Bible – God’s Word – describes. That same day I received the Holy Spirit by the laying on of hands, and was baptized by full immersion (ACTS 2:37-39). When I came out of the water, the new language I had just received came out of my mouth powerfully. What an experience! I felt so clean, and – as the scripture says – as a new creature in Christ.
Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. (2 CORINTHIANS 5:17)
Then my walk as a Christian began. From that moment on I read the Bible with a totally new understanding, which is given by the Holy Spirit within us, who reveals the truth to us (1 CORINTHIANS 2:11-12; JOHN 16:13).
Over all the years that I have been saved I can testify that God has always been faithful and good towards me, without me deserving it. He has directed my path and has blessed me in many ways, and has protected me from the evil of this world. It is as the scripture says:
It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth. (Lamentations 3:27) In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (PROVERBS 3:6)
Vroni, Switzerland
This is a testimony of how God saved me from a life of hypocrisy, sickness and New Age philosophy.
At the age of 16, I was an active member of the Lutheran church. Despite this, I was heavily involved in astrology, yoga and other New Age practices. I knew several “white witches” and was often tempted to go further and try things like “moving glasses”. Unfortunately, I was never warned by any of the other church members or by my pastor about the spiritual danger of these things and I was even invited to a yoga seminar by one of our deacons. I was also taught in school during religious education classes not to take the Bible seriously. Nevertheless, I found that something or someone stopped me from getting involved in more serious occult practices, like “moving glasses” or talking to the dead.
I led a fairly normal teenage life. I went to parties and did other teenage things and yet I grew more and more unhappy. This unhappiness was especially apparent on Sundays, when I had to read from the Bible for Sunday school. I felt that something was awfully wrong in my life. There was a big difference between the things that happened in my own life and in my church and what I read about in the Bible. I felt empty and dirty. I tried to compensate for these feelings by becoming more active in the church. I also got involved in conservation groups and other similar causes, but nothing really satisfied me.
After taking part in a seminar for future youth group leaders held by my church, I got a big shock and decided to leave. The seminar lasted for almost a week and many strange things happened during this time like drug abuse (In one room it was so bad that you got affected just by walking in there!), promiscuity, and experimenting with quite a few esoteric methods like autogenic training. Although I did not have a lot of biblical knowledge I was quite upset about the whole situation. On top of that, one of the seminar leaders tried to rape me. After that I gave up on the idea of being in a “Christian” group.
The seminar lasted for almost a week and many strange things happened…
A short while later, after another one of my relationships broke up, I cried out to God to help me and show me how to lead a more fulfilled, healthy and better life. The many disappointments I had experienced with the church and my ex-boyfriends made it difficult for me to trust anyone. I was often depressed and had no inner peace. I also had low blood pressure (I had fainted a few times) and motion sickness.
The Lord answered my prayer by sending me a genuine Christian woman who told me about the Holy Spirit. I had never heard of this before and was very surprised that God still does great miracles today. I still had doubts, but soon realized her absolute sincerity and enthusiasm was something I had never seen before with other “so-called Christians”. At the same time, I started to realize how hypocritical I was. I realized I had completely missed out on developing a proper relationship with God because I had not taken His Word seriously.
After this I was unable to forget what I had been told about the power of the Holy Spirit and how this could transform a person from the inside out. After several days I decided to call the woman who gave me the tract. I can still remember sitting in front of the phone and praying:” Lord, if this isn’t a cult and you are leading me there then let this woman answer the phone immediately!” …And she did!
Lord… let this woman answer the phone immediately!” …And she did!
A short time later I went along to a house meeting with the Christian lady. From the beginning I felt like I was “at home” and I listened curiously while the others were praying in the Spirit. A deep conviction of sin, Godly fear and a desire “to make things right with God” grew within me and I prayed to God and surrendered my life to Him. “If this is the right place for me, LORD, and the place where You want me to be, then please give me the same gift!” Soon after, I received the Holy Spirit and started speaking in another tongue as described in the Book of ACTS.
I was baptized the very next day in a swimming pool and I really felt the burden dropping from my heart. From that moment on, I was healed from depression, my low blood pressure and my motion sickness. The Lord healed my “wounds of mistrust”, gave me inner peace, eternal life, and much more!
Praise the Lord!!
- Angela Germany
Hi, my name is Marie and this is the story of how I got saved!
It all started a couple of years ago. I was living in Abbotsford, BC, in Canada, with my boyfriend and his mother. I had just relocated to BC from Ontario where I grew up. I had left home because nothing seemed to be working out for me. I was living a life of pure selfishness, taking advantage of everyone around me and using them for drugs or sex. Through my lifestyle I destroyed any hope of gaining a good job and fulfilling my many responsibilities, including being a mother to my son. I often lied and cheated, stole and played with many hearts to satisfy my desires. I had many plans and goals, but never bothered to carry them out. I had abandoned everything and flew out to BC in order to escape the reality of my situation, not even telling my parents until later on.
I resided with my boyfriend and his mother for a short while until my ungratefulness and disrespect caused us to be kicked out. We then ended up staying in homeless shelters for a couple of months, until I could gain money from the government to support my living expenses, which at the time were drugs and cigarettes. As my drug habit became extensive, I needed more money to support it. I ended up sinking in my pride and learning how to hustle people for money on the street. I made a lot of money by asking whoever crossed my path and told whatever story or excuse I could think of. I would even cry when telling people my stories to convince them that I really did need the money. I quickly learned that this was the easy way to make a few dollars.
I was really into smoking marijuana.
I was really into smoking marijuana. Since BC produces and sells a lot of the stuff, it was easy to get a hold of (You can even go into cafes and smoke it freely here). I got involved in selling the stuff in popular places, where there was a steady traffic flow of people such as ‘Skytrain’ stations or on busy streets. This was an eye-opening experience for me. People fought each other to get sales and risked everything to make money from selling ‘pot’. Certain people threatened my life every day, but somehow, I was always protected. I recall a few occasions where people tried to tell me about the Kingdom of God. One man in particular gave me his testimony and told me that I must turn away from my lifestyle. He warned me, but I was too stoned to care. Eventually, the place where I was selling got “heated out” by the ‘cops’ (The drug traffic was halted due to extensive police patrol!) so I could not sell anymore. I had no more funds to pay for the expensive hotel where we were staying, and we were forced to live and sleep outside. I was panic-stricken and at the moment of my breakdown, a lady stopped her car on the highway and took my boyfriend and I home with her. She fed us and gave us a place to stay, with showers and laundry, for one month. This was a miracle!
I continued to make money by convincing people to buy used ‘Skytrain’ tickets. I was eventually caught, but I just continued to ‘panhandle’ anywhere and everywhere, meeting all sorts of people. Somehow, I was protected from many strangers who approached me. The people that I hustled with were often drugs addicts who would even turn on their best friends in order to get some more ‘dope’. However, I was able to establish a friendship with one girl who always looked out for me while we were on the street.
…awake in cafes by doing crystal meth…
It got to the point where I had no home at all and ended up sneaking into places like shopping mall washrooms, sleeping in the back of trucks or staying awake in cafes by doing crystal meth. In order to eat, I found that I could always go to churches to get free meals, so I rarely went hungry. I eventually had to use other methods of getting people to give me money, like stealing from ticket machines, parking meters, selling food, ripping off people and selling fake drugs. If there was a will there was a way. The cops really could do nothing because too much of this was going on everywhere.
Finally, the drug scene in this area died. Things were getting desperate, as it seemed that every place that I went was ‘dry’ ― I couldn’t seem to get my hands on any money. So, my boyfriend and I decided to hitchhike to Calgary, Alberta, which we were told would be a more prosperous place. In the last church we stopped at for a free meal, people laid hands on us and prayed that we would get off the streets and find shelter and jobs. Miraculously we were given just enough money to get the bus back to Abbotsford.
We decided to stop in at my boyfriend’s mother’s house for one last meal before continuing on our way. It was weird this time, because once we arrived, she wouldn’t let us leave. I was so grateful this time around. We decided to stay until we could get enough money to travel on to Calgary.
In Abbotsford, unlike downtown Vancouver, it seemed rather difficult to hustle people for money. Instead, I went to a temporary work agency to attain work for the day. It wasn’t long before I found myself working every day, often for different companies. One place in particular kept asking me to come back. So, I went every day and worked hard. They decided to hire me full time, which made me very happy, as the job was very good. At the place where I worked there were very nice people, especially one girl who spoke with me often and even drove me home sometimes. She called me often and would invite me to get together with some of her friends. Finally, after much persuasion from my boyfriend’s mother, we accepted the invitation.
Her friends introduced themselves and showed us around their farm. We had a campfire and a sausage sizzle and everyone was very friendly and welcoming. We ate and sang campfire songs, and then, after much conversation, one man started to preach about prophecy in the Bible. I knew there was something about them; they were extremely happy and nice.
After hearing some testimonies and reading in the Bible, I decided to go to another meeting on the Sunday. My friend who I worked with showed me Scriptures on taking communion (1 CORINTHIANS 11:23-29) which shocked me, because when I was in Ontario, I used to go along to a church that let me take communion even though I was fornicating and doing drugs. I had gone occasionally to this one church in Ontario, but I never took the Word of God seriously. I would even go to a study group, just to show face. I believed in Jesus, but never obeyed the Bible, and I didn’t really care, too. I knew in my heart that my life wasn’t right, but I never did anything about it and continued to smoke dope while reading the Bible. I did not realize the consequences of sinning or that the Bible tells you to keep yourself pure until marriage (1 CORINTHIANS 6:9-10), so I continued to live life for myself and use drugs to mask the reality of how I really felt. Little did I know that God had a plan for me all along to hear and understand His full gospel, and learn for the first time about repentance and God’s judgment.
The first Sunday when I came along to the meeting, they used the gifts of the Spirit; speaking in tongues and then interpreting. I was so convicted by the words, which seemed to be just for me, that I cried and cried. On Wednesday my boyfriend and I came to another meeting and this time my boyfriend had many questions. What impressed me was that every one of them was answered from the Bible, and I could see that it was genuinely lived in these people’s lives and they were full of joy because of it. It finally came down to my decision and the last days were spent weeping in repentance for all the things I had done wrong. We did lots of praying and reading in the Bible (John 3:3), and then we went for it! On a beautiful summer day, we were baptized for the remission of sins ― first my boyfriend, and then myself! We were so glad and had smiles from ear to ear. I had been so anxious, but now my mind was clear. After this they prayed for me to receive the Holy Spirit just like in the Book of Acts. As soon as I embraced God and believed the scriptures in LUKE 11:11-13, The Lord gave me the Holy Spirit and a new tongue to pray with ― it was so cool!
Now I could begin my new life in Christ
Now I could begin my new life in Christ (2 CORINTHIANS 5:17), however, there was one thing I needed urgent prayer for ― my cigarette smoking. We prayed as the apostles did in MARK 16:18 and when I went home and tried to smoke ― it didn’t taste like a cigarette ― it was disgusting. Since then, I’ve had no desire to smoke whatsoever ― what a testimony! I began telling everyone about what had happened to me and what the Bible says about Salvation. I knew Scriptures and could now put them into practice.
So many miracles have occurred since then. The Lord has blessed me one-hundred-fold. He helped me to obtain a driver’s license and a college education to become a Nursing Assistant. He provided for me financially with a new job that is within walking distance from where I live in Chilliwack, and where I have had the joy of seeing people healed from various sicknesses after praying for them. I have also been given the privilege to travel and meet with other assembly groups, such as the one in California. This past summer, I went along to a summer camp where I met many more people in the Assembly ― many who have amazing testimonies of salvation like me.
I even met my one friend who I was on the street with ― she was ‘coincidently’ in the same place in Abbotsford one day ― and she came to one of our meetings. She was very excited for me and my new life, as she had been worried about me and wondering where I had disappeared to. We got to pray for her back and the Lord healed it from scoliosis. I could go on and on, but this would turn into a book! The Lord has shown me great mercy and obviously had His hand in everything for a long time! I am sure glad He chose me and gave me hope to fulfil His great plan ― such an awesome one by the way.
Praise the Lord, Marie
It all started a couple of years ago. I was living in Abbotsford, BC, in Canada, with my boyfriend and his mother. I had just relocated to BC from Ontario where I grew up. I had left home because nothing seemed to be working out for me. I was living a life of pure selfishness, taking advantage of everyone around me and using them for drugs or sex. Through my lifestyle I destroyed any hope of gaining a good job and fulfilling my many responsibilities, including being a mother to my son. I often lied and cheated, stole and played with many hearts to satisfy my desires. I had many plans and goals, but never bothered to carry them out. I had abandoned everything and flew out to BC in order to escape the reality of my situation, not even telling my parents until later on.
I resided with my boyfriend and his mother for a short while until my ungratefulness and disrespect caused us to be kicked out. We then ended up staying in homeless shelters for a couple of months, until I could gain money from the government to support my living expenses, which at the time were drugs and cigarettes. As my drug habit became extensive, I needed more money to support it. I ended up sinking in my pride and learning how to hustle people for money on the street. I made a lot of money by asking whoever crossed my path and told whatever story or excuse I could think of. I would even cry when telling people my stories to convince them that I really did need the money. I quickly learned that this was the easy way to make a few dollars.
I was really into smoking marijuana.
I was really into smoking marijuana. Since BC produces and sells a lot of the stuff, it was easy to get a hold of (You can even go into cafes and smoke it freely here). I got involved in selling the stuff in popular places, where there was a steady traffic flow of people such as ‘Skytrain’ stations or on busy streets. This was an eye-opening experience for me. People fought each other to get sales and risked everything to make money from selling ‘pot’. Certain people threatened my life every day, but somehow, I was always protected. I recall a few occasions where people tried to tell me about the Kingdom of God. One man in particular gave me his testimony and told me that I must turn away from my lifestyle. He warned me, but I was too stoned to care. Eventually, the place where I was selling got “heated out” by the ‘cops’ (The drug traffic was halted due to extensive police patrol!) so I could not sell anymore. I had no more funds to pay for the expensive hotel where we were staying, and we were forced to live and sleep outside. I was panic-stricken and at the moment of my breakdown, a lady stopped her car on the highway and took my boyfriend and I home with her. She fed us and gave us a place to stay, with showers and laundry, for one month. This was a miracle!
I continued to make money by convincing people to buy used ‘Skytrain’ tickets. I was eventually caught, but I just continued to ‘panhandle’ anywhere and everywhere, meeting all sorts of people. Somehow, I was protected from many strangers who approached me. The people that I hustled with were often drugs addicts who would even turn on their best friends in order to get some more ‘dope’. However, I was able to establish a friendship with one girl who always looked out for me while we were on the street.
…awake in cafes by doing crystal meth…
It got to the point where I had no home at all and ended up sneaking into places like shopping mall washrooms, sleeping in the back of trucks or staying awake in cafes by doing crystal meth. In order to eat, I found that I could always go to churches to get free meals, so I rarely went hungry. I eventually had to use other methods of getting people to give me money, like stealing from ticket machines, parking meters, selling food, ripping off people and selling fake drugs. If there was a will there was a way. The cops really could do nothing because too much of this was going on everywhere.
Finally, the drug scene in this area died. Things were getting desperate, as it seemed that every place that I went was ‘dry’ ― I couldn’t seem to get my hands on any money. So, my boyfriend and I decided to hitchhike to Calgary, Alberta, which we were told would be a more prosperous place. In the last church we stopped at for a free meal, people laid hands on us and prayed that we would get off the streets and find shelter and jobs. Miraculously we were given just enough money to get the bus back to Abbotsford.
We decided to stop in at my boyfriend’s mother’s house for one last meal before continuing on our way. It was weird this time, because once we arrived, she wouldn’t let us leave. I was so grateful this time around. We decided to stay until we could get enough money to travel on to Calgary.
In Abbotsford, unlike downtown Vancouver, it seemed rather difficult to hustle people for money. Instead, I went to a temporary work agency to attain work for the day. It wasn’t long before I found myself working every day, often for different companies. One place in particular kept asking me to come back. So, I went every day and worked hard. They decided to hire me full time, which made me very happy, as the job was very good. At the place where I worked there were very nice people, especially one girl who spoke with me often and even drove me home sometimes. She called me often and would invite me to get together with some of her friends. Finally, after much persuasion from my boyfriend’s mother, we accepted the invitation.
Her friends introduced themselves and showed us around their farm. We had a campfire and a sausage sizzle and everyone was very friendly and welcoming. We ate and sang campfire songs, and then, after much conversation, one man started to preach about prophecy in the Bible. I knew there was something about them; they were extremely happy and nice.
After hearing some testimonies and reading in the Bible, I decided to go to another meeting on the Sunday. My friend who I worked with showed me Scriptures on taking communion (1 CORINTHIANS 11:23-29) which shocked me, because when I was in Ontario, I used to go along to a church that let me take communion even though I was fornicating and doing drugs. I had gone occasionally to this one church in Ontario, but I never took the Word of God seriously. I would even go to a study group, just to show face. I believed in Jesus, but never obeyed the Bible, and I didn’t really care, too. I knew in my heart that my life wasn’t right, but I never did anything about it and continued to smoke dope while reading the Bible. I did not realize the consequences of sinning or that the Bible tells you to keep yourself pure until marriage (1 CORINTHIANS 6:9-10), so I continued to live life for myself and use drugs to mask the reality of how I really felt. Little did I know that God had a plan for me all along to hear and understand His full gospel, and learn for the first time about repentance and God’s judgment.
The first Sunday when I came along to the meeting, they used the gifts of the Spirit; speaking in tongues and then interpreting. I was so convicted by the words, which seemed to be just for me, that I cried and cried. On Wednesday my boyfriend and I came to another meeting and this time my boyfriend had many questions. What impressed me was that every one of them was answered from the Bible, and I could see that it was genuinely lived in these people’s lives and they were full of joy because of it. It finally came down to my decision and the last days were spent weeping in repentance for all the things I had done wrong. We did lots of praying and reading in the Bible (John 3:3), and then we went for it! On a beautiful summer day, we were baptized for the remission of sins ― first my boyfriend, and then myself! We were so glad and had smiles from ear to ear. I had been so anxious, but now my mind was clear. After this they prayed for me to receive the Holy Spirit just like in the Book of Acts. As soon as I embraced God and believed the scriptures in LUKE 11:11-13, The Lord gave me the Holy Spirit and a new tongue to pray with ― it was so cool!
Now I could begin my new life in Christ
Now I could begin my new life in Christ (2 CORINTHIANS 5:17), however, there was one thing I needed urgent prayer for ― my cigarette smoking. We prayed as the apostles did in MARK 16:18 and when I went home and tried to smoke ― it didn’t taste like a cigarette ― it was disgusting. Since then, I’ve had no desire to smoke whatsoever ― what a testimony! I began telling everyone about what had happened to me and what the Bible says about Salvation. I knew Scriptures and could now put them into practice.
So many miracles have occurred since then. The Lord has blessed me one-hundred-fold. He helped me to obtain a driver’s license and a college education to become a Nursing Assistant. He provided for me financially with a new job that is within walking distance from where I live in Chilliwack, and where I have had the joy of seeing people healed from various sicknesses after praying for them. I have also been given the privilege to travel and meet with other assembly groups, such as the one in California. This past summer, I went along to a summer camp where I met many more people in the Assembly ― many who have amazing testimonies of salvation like me.
I even met my one friend who I was on the street with ― she was ‘coincidently’ in the same place in Abbotsford one day ― and she came to one of our meetings. She was very excited for me and my new life, as she had been worried about me and wondering where I had disappeared to. We got to pray for her back and the Lord healed it from scoliosis. I could go on and on, but this would turn into a book! The Lord has shown me great mercy and obviously had His hand in everything for a long time! I am sure glad He chose me and gave me hope to fulfil His great plan ― such an awesome one by the way.
Praise the Lord, Marie
Hi to everyone!
I would like to share what happened to me at school. I have always been fascinated by how amazing our world is – especially the beauty in nature and how amazing our bodies work. When I would look at the things around me, I knew that it had to be created by a powerful God, not by chance. Naturally, the debate over creation vs. evolution was an exciting one for me. So, when I found that we would spend a whole unit on evolution, I was excited. This would be an amazing opportunity to tell others about God through creation. I asked my teacher right away if I could do a presentation on creationism.
When my teacher first introduced the subject, she explained the mindset that had existed before Darwin came out with his book, The Origin of Species. She challenged anyone in the class to prove that God existed. When I told this to one of the people in our house group, she encouraged me to take up that challenge. With her help, I wrote a little paper on that subject and handed it in.
Throughout the semester, I asked my teacher when I could do my presentation. There never was enough time, so it was always postponed. Eventually the last day of that semester, the teacher allowed me to make my presentation. She gave me the last ten to fifteen minutes of class to do it. She made it obvious from the start that she did not support it at all. I started off by showing a part of the video, ‘Creatures that Defy Evolution’, and then talked a little bit. Even though I was not given enough time and had to rush, I could see that this made my classmates think.
Right after this class, Nina, a friend of mine who was in this class, asked me when our next church meeting was and if she could come again (she had previously come to a church meeting). This was so great because she wanted to come on her own accord. Praise the Lord!
Love in Christ, Andrea
I would like to share what happened to me at school. I have always been fascinated by how amazing our world is – especially the beauty in nature and how amazing our bodies work. When I would look at the things around me, I knew that it had to be created by a powerful God, not by chance. Naturally, the debate over creation vs. evolution was an exciting one for me. So, when I found that we would spend a whole unit on evolution, I was excited. This would be an amazing opportunity to tell others about God through creation. I asked my teacher right away if I could do a presentation on creationism.
When my teacher first introduced the subject, she explained the mindset that had existed before Darwin came out with his book, The Origin of Species. She challenged anyone in the class to prove that God existed. When I told this to one of the people in our house group, she encouraged me to take up that challenge. With her help, I wrote a little paper on that subject and handed it in.
Throughout the semester, I asked my teacher when I could do my presentation. There never was enough time, so it was always postponed. Eventually the last day of that semester, the teacher allowed me to make my presentation. She gave me the last ten to fifteen minutes of class to do it. She made it obvious from the start that she did not support it at all. I started off by showing a part of the video, ‘Creatures that Defy Evolution’, and then talked a little bit. Even though I was not given enough time and had to rush, I could see that this made my classmates think.
Right after this class, Nina, a friend of mine who was in this class, asked me when our next church meeting was and if she could come again (she had previously come to a church meeting). This was so great because she wanted to come on her own accord. Praise the Lord!
Love in Christ, Andrea
I spent the first 7 years of my life in Germany until my parents moved to Scotland as missionaries. As my parents were quite involved in the church, I too tagged along, going to the meetings, or services, twice a week, and also taking part in the maintenance work of the church properties.
I didn’t know much about God or the Bible etc., but I just joined in as I saw the joy that the people had, but didn’t give it much thought. After a while I started to ask myself what motivates everyone in my church group to come to the meetings, work at the properties, giving up time and money for the church. And why was everyone so happy about it?! So, I started to read my Bible to see what it actually says. I knew my parents believed it, my pastor believed it and everyone in the church believed it, but I knew very little about it, let alone believed it. What I found did rather surprise me.
This was, of course, an amazing experience for me. I had experienced what Jesus spoke about in JOHN 3:3-5. I had been baptized and had received the Holy Spirit; therefore, I was now on the way to heaven and had escaped God’s judgment on my sins.
But a Christian life doesn’t stop there. Receiving the Holy Spirit is only the start of an exciting life where I can get to know God more and more. I had gone to church for years to tick boxes, because my parents went. But that is not what Christianity is about. It is about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It is joy, peace and a clear conscience:
For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. (ROMANS 14:17). Jesus, talking about the devil, said: The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. (JOHN 10:10). This is the life that Jesus promises everyone who follows Him; life abundantly! The main thing about a Christian life is not going to church or abiding by a set of rules, it is deeper than that. It is about getting to know Jesus Christ, the author and finisher of our faith (HEBREWS 12:2). Once I understood this, I started getting joy that I had never thought possible before, and peace, which is not linked to the circumstances but to the knowledge that God is taking care of the situation. Because of this joy I started to seek God regularly; reading His Word, and praying in the Holy Ghost first thing in the morning. This seeking caused me to get closer to God and things in the Bible started to make sense in a way I had never thought of before.
This joy also caused me to want to tell others about what God did in my life. So, I went to people and asked if I could pray for them, and I have seen many miracles where people have been miraculously healed from pain and sickness (MARK 16:17-18).
Now, of course the guidelines and rules are important. Following them or not will determine if you have a blessed life or not (Deuteronomy 11:26-28). Imagine a football game with no rules and no referee. The rules in football define the game and therefore differentiate it to other sports. But the game is not all about the rules. I am not a Christian because I go to church, but because I choose to follow Christ and His teaching, simply because I have experienced the blessings of following Jesus Christ in my life. Therefore, I chose to go to church, read my Bible, live a biblical life, with rules or guidelines. And as I read my Bible, I get to know Christ more and more and He becomes alive in me, and real, encouraging me to seek Him further.
I didn’t know much about God or the Bible etc., but I just joined in as I saw the joy that the people had, but didn’t give it much thought. After a while I started to ask myself what motivates everyone in my church group to come to the meetings, work at the properties, giving up time and money for the church. And why was everyone so happy about it?! So, I started to read my Bible to see what it actually says. I knew my parents believed it, my pastor believed it and everyone in the church believed it, but I knew very little about it, let alone believed it. What I found did rather surprise me.
This was, of course, an amazing experience for me. I had experienced what Jesus spoke about in JOHN 3:3-5. I had been baptized and had received the Holy Spirit; therefore, I was now on the way to heaven and had escaped God’s judgment on my sins.
But a Christian life doesn’t stop there. Receiving the Holy Spirit is only the start of an exciting life where I can get to know God more and more. I had gone to church for years to tick boxes, because my parents went. But that is not what Christianity is about. It is about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It is joy, peace and a clear conscience:
For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. (ROMANS 14:17). Jesus, talking about the devil, said: The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. (JOHN 10:10). This is the life that Jesus promises everyone who follows Him; life abundantly! The main thing about a Christian life is not going to church or abiding by a set of rules, it is deeper than that. It is about getting to know Jesus Christ, the author and finisher of our faith (HEBREWS 12:2). Once I understood this, I started getting joy that I had never thought possible before, and peace, which is not linked to the circumstances but to the knowledge that God is taking care of the situation. Because of this joy I started to seek God regularly; reading His Word, and praying in the Holy Ghost first thing in the morning. This seeking caused me to get closer to God and things in the Bible started to make sense in a way I had never thought of before.
This joy also caused me to want to tell others about what God did in my life. So, I went to people and asked if I could pray for them, and I have seen many miracles where people have been miraculously healed from pain and sickness (MARK 16:17-18).
Now, of course the guidelines and rules are important. Following them or not will determine if you have a blessed life or not (Deuteronomy 11:26-28). Imagine a football game with no rules and no referee. The rules in football define the game and therefore differentiate it to other sports. But the game is not all about the rules. I am not a Christian because I go to church, but because I choose to follow Christ and His teaching, simply because I have experienced the blessings of following Jesus Christ in my life. Therefore, I chose to go to church, read my Bible, live a biblical life, with rules or guidelines. And as I read my Bible, I get to know Christ more and more and He becomes alive in me, and real, encouraging me to seek Him further.
- JJ
Hi everyone!
I wanted to share a testimony that means a lot to me…
I have always loved running and taking part in a lot of sprinting competitions. While I was sprinting in an athletic competition, I realized that I found it hard to run, and that something was slowing me down. I ignored it for a while until it started affecting how I walked as well as how I ran. When I walked it felt like I was standing unevenly, and I started getting pains in my muscles and joints in my left leg. The pain continued to grow worse and I started having to limp. It got harder and harder to run, but I had no idea what was causing this pain. When I got home one evening, I realized that my left leg was around an inch shorter than my right! My mum looked at it, and she, my brother and my sister all commanded my left leg to grow while ‘praying in tongues’.
Jeremiah17:14
Heal me, LORD, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.
During the prayer I felt a tingling sensation in my left leg, and I could feel the power of God’s hand healing me! I could feel my leg growing! My family also said that they saw it growing during the prayer, and we continued praying and praising God. Now both my legs are exactly the same length and I can continue competing and sprinting. I haven’t had any pain since.
Praise the Lord!
Joana,
Australia
I wanted to share a testimony that means a lot to me…
I have always loved running and taking part in a lot of sprinting competitions. While I was sprinting in an athletic competition, I realized that I found it hard to run, and that something was slowing me down. I ignored it for a while until it started affecting how I walked as well as how I ran. When I walked it felt like I was standing unevenly, and I started getting pains in my muscles and joints in my left leg. The pain continued to grow worse and I started having to limp. It got harder and harder to run, but I had no idea what was causing this pain. When I got home one evening, I realized that my left leg was around an inch shorter than my right! My mum looked at it, and she, my brother and my sister all commanded my left leg to grow while ‘praying in tongues’.
Jeremiah17:14
Heal me, LORD, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.
During the prayer I felt a tingling sensation in my left leg, and I could feel the power of God’s hand healing me! I could feel my leg growing! My family also said that they saw it growing during the prayer, and we continued praying and praising God. Now both my legs are exactly the same length and I can continue competing and sprinting. I haven’t had any pain since.
Praise the Lord!
Joana,
Australia
Jesus has been doing some awesome things in my life lately, and I'm so excited!
He's been changing me now more than ever, and I can't describe how blessed and joyful I am...and it's that kinda joy that only comes from Jesus...the one that's so mesmerizing and awesome, indescribable and wonderful!!
Each day, He's reminding me more of who I am in Him, and He's giving me a little more boldness.
A couple months ago, I was a very quiet person and very much in my own shell. I would have panic and anxiety attacks around large groups of people, and I would have to hide in the bathrooms until I could contain it from showing.
But God has been doing so much in my life, that now I can walk confidently into large groups, and know who I am in Christ. I am chosen, loved, forgiven, unique, precious, and so much more, I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
It's so awesome that we can become children of God, and testify of the work He's doing in our lives and the lives of those around us!
I am still a work in progress, no doubt, and I'm quite often a mess, but I'm God's mess, and He loves every bit of me...that's what leads to change in my life...it's because He loves all of me, and is so unbelievably patient...the love of God leads me to repentance and He urges me on.
He sees the potential in me when I don't see anything. He sees us as we can be in Him, and that's what makes Him so merciful, patient, loving and kind. Wow...He is awesome...
- Caitlin
He's been changing me now more than ever, and I can't describe how blessed and joyful I am...and it's that kinda joy that only comes from Jesus...the one that's so mesmerizing and awesome, indescribable and wonderful!!
Each day, He's reminding me more of who I am in Him, and He's giving me a little more boldness.
A couple months ago, I was a very quiet person and very much in my own shell. I would have panic and anxiety attacks around large groups of people, and I would have to hide in the bathrooms until I could contain it from showing.
But God has been doing so much in my life, that now I can walk confidently into large groups, and know who I am in Christ. I am chosen, loved, forgiven, unique, precious, and so much more, I AM A CHILD OF GOD!
It's so awesome that we can become children of God, and testify of the work He's doing in our lives and the lives of those around us!
I am still a work in progress, no doubt, and I'm quite often a mess, but I'm God's mess, and He loves every bit of me...that's what leads to change in my life...it's because He loves all of me, and is so unbelievably patient...the love of God leads me to repentance and He urges me on.
He sees the potential in me when I don't see anything. He sees us as we can be in Him, and that's what makes Him so merciful, patient, loving and kind. Wow...He is awesome...
- Caitlin
My life had some storms but after the storm is the sunshine. Jesus is my sunshine. I consider God as my Heavenly Father. This is why.
I grew up going to church. But I didn’t read much out of the Bible. I wasn’t involved in church.
My dad molested me when I was 8. So, my mom divorced him. She worked two jobs trying to support all three of us girls. We got food from the food bank sometimes and help from our church.
When I was about 13, my mom started seeing someone. I became obsessed with exercising and watching what I ate. I got down to 100 pounds. My family members found out. I started feeling faint a lot so I decided to stop.
My mom got married again when I was eighteen. My stepdad sexually abused my twin sister over the course of two years. I caught him in the act. My twin got blamed for this for some reason. My mom and step dad are still together today. This brings me confusion. My twin has lots of headaches and gets depressed.
When I turned 17, I started getting involved with my church. I went on mission trips. I joined a small group. I got to know my heavenly father way more. I had a relationship with Jesus and that changed my life. I got baptized.
My savior provides, loves, and heals.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.
Psalm 28:7
Jesus is there for you! Loves you so much.
I grew up going to church. But I didn’t read much out of the Bible. I wasn’t involved in church.
My dad molested me when I was 8. So, my mom divorced him. She worked two jobs trying to support all three of us girls. We got food from the food bank sometimes and help from our church.
When I was about 13, my mom started seeing someone. I became obsessed with exercising and watching what I ate. I got down to 100 pounds. My family members found out. I started feeling faint a lot so I decided to stop.
My mom got married again when I was eighteen. My stepdad sexually abused my twin sister over the course of two years. I caught him in the act. My twin got blamed for this for some reason. My mom and step dad are still together today. This brings me confusion. My twin has lots of headaches and gets depressed.
When I turned 17, I started getting involved with my church. I went on mission trips. I joined a small group. I got to know my heavenly father way more. I had a relationship with Jesus and that changed my life. I got baptized.
My savior provides, loves, and heals.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.
Psalm 28:7
Jesus is there for you! Loves you so much.
- Kim
My story begins when I was nine years old. I went to church and was a "Christian" but not really. I didn't understand much of anything. The only thing I knew was that Jesus died and Noah had an Ark. I didn't read the Bible. But I was a "Christian" so to speak. As years went by, I never prayed to God. I sometimes wonder now why God didn't speak to me sooner, but I always knew He had the best plan ever.
I was a geek and lonely and wanted a girlfriend like everyone else. When it came to girls, I couldn't get the message if anyone liked me or disliked me. So, I just assumed a lot of times no one liked me at all, and this put me in depression. I was depressed a lot. And I came on the verge of suicide multiple times.
By the time I was in ninth grade, I felt like I had hit rock bottom and needed someone. That's when God stepped in, and He used someone to do it. Rebekah stepped in out of nowhere due to my courage to try and go after her in a desperate attempt to get a girlfriend.
She was super nice, and I was attracted to her so much. She asked me if I believed in God and, well, I told her I did but that I didn't believe He wanted me because of all the mistakes I had made in the past. She told me I was dead wrong, and boy was I.
We became friends and bonded and soon I made the first moves at The Winter Snowball dance and asked her to dance. A seed was planted within me. After the dance, I started going to her church youth group. It was just because of her at first, and I thought it was kind of fun.
We shared our first kiss on Valentine's Day and started to date and even published it on Facebook. Well, her parents didn't like it one bit at first. They made her break up with me, and this made me extremely sad. Over the next months, we went through this cycle where we would get to be more than friends, then her parents would tighten the leash a little. Also, another guy who liked her would constantly try to leave me out of the picture.
Through all of these trials, I eventually figured out that my relationship with God is what I needed to work on first.
I read the whole Bible (a simplified version) in six months. And I just kept getting closer to the Lord, each day getting one step closer. I came to realize why Rebekah's parents kept us apart for so long. I thought it was because they wanted their daughter to be safe, but actually it was to make our relationship stronger. Every time we broke up then came back together, our relationship got stronger.
In August 2013, my relationship with the Lord really took off running. I got so much closer to Him, and every day since, God has strengthened my relationship with Him through just about everything.
I believe Rebekah saved my life technically three times—twice because of my suicide anxiety and once when she saved my eternal life by introducing me to Jesus once again. Today, we have been going steady and strong now since September and although we may not be perfect, God uses our mistakes for good, just like Joseph's brothers.
I pray every day now. I read the Bible every day. I thank God for Rebekah and our relationship, and I just praise Jesus! I always laugh when I think about how if I didn't meet Rebekah, I wouldn't have met the Lord. If the Lord hadn't used Rebekah in my life, I wouldn't have known her. If He hadn't used Rebekah in my life, I wouldn't have known Him.
I want to just share my story with people and say, even when God looks like He's not doing anything, just keep the faith and believe He's working in the unseen behind the scenes!
- Chris
I was a geek and lonely and wanted a girlfriend like everyone else. When it came to girls, I couldn't get the message if anyone liked me or disliked me. So, I just assumed a lot of times no one liked me at all, and this put me in depression. I was depressed a lot. And I came on the verge of suicide multiple times.
By the time I was in ninth grade, I felt like I had hit rock bottom and needed someone. That's when God stepped in, and He used someone to do it. Rebekah stepped in out of nowhere due to my courage to try and go after her in a desperate attempt to get a girlfriend.
She was super nice, and I was attracted to her so much. She asked me if I believed in God and, well, I told her I did but that I didn't believe He wanted me because of all the mistakes I had made in the past. She told me I was dead wrong, and boy was I.
We became friends and bonded and soon I made the first moves at The Winter Snowball dance and asked her to dance. A seed was planted within me. After the dance, I started going to her church youth group. It was just because of her at first, and I thought it was kind of fun.
We shared our first kiss on Valentine's Day and started to date and even published it on Facebook. Well, her parents didn't like it one bit at first. They made her break up with me, and this made me extremely sad. Over the next months, we went through this cycle where we would get to be more than friends, then her parents would tighten the leash a little. Also, another guy who liked her would constantly try to leave me out of the picture.
Through all of these trials, I eventually figured out that my relationship with God is what I needed to work on first.
I read the whole Bible (a simplified version) in six months. And I just kept getting closer to the Lord, each day getting one step closer. I came to realize why Rebekah's parents kept us apart for so long. I thought it was because they wanted their daughter to be safe, but actually it was to make our relationship stronger. Every time we broke up then came back together, our relationship got stronger.
In August 2013, my relationship with the Lord really took off running. I got so much closer to Him, and every day since, God has strengthened my relationship with Him through just about everything.
I believe Rebekah saved my life technically three times—twice because of my suicide anxiety and once when she saved my eternal life by introducing me to Jesus once again. Today, we have been going steady and strong now since September and although we may not be perfect, God uses our mistakes for good, just like Joseph's brothers.
I pray every day now. I read the Bible every day. I thank God for Rebekah and our relationship, and I just praise Jesus! I always laugh when I think about how if I didn't meet Rebekah, I wouldn't have met the Lord. If the Lord hadn't used Rebekah in my life, I wouldn't have known her. If He hadn't used Rebekah in my life, I wouldn't have known Him.
I want to just share my story with people and say, even when God looks like He's not doing anything, just keep the faith and believe He's working in the unseen behind the scenes!
- Chris
Nobody really knows about me, and I really wanted to go out there and tell others what I really grew up with, what I love to do, what I struggle with, and what Jesus has done for me. If you don't want to read (because of how long this is), that's all good my friend.
And this may be hard to read to some because of what happened but I really want to share with others, without getting put down, and just because I want to show that you are not alone, and to simply just confess what I have done in the past rather than covering it all up, of every bad mistake & choice I have made. ☹️
So, I really had a huge grudge on a few people growing up, because what they have done to me physically & emotionally. And because of holding that grudge against them, because of being not cared for and being molested, it really really took a toll on me and it really didn't help with the situation... and I have grew up as a kid where people think less of me because I was “too young” and I was put in a grade above my age average , if that makes sense? People really put me down continuously, I was bullied at a young age, got made fun of because of my voice, because of the way I appeared to be, always judged for the outward appearances. Always getting in trouble from and out of school, got in school fights with kids that were not even my age or below my age average, I know now that all these years it was the evil one blinding me and getting to me in every situation in my life.
Everyone hated the way I was, so I tried to fit in and be like the popular kids, and try to be like them so I can get the attention I need. It really didn't work and I really struggled , I was blind spiritually and Satan has controlled my life and attacked me all these years , I had many “friends”, we would go back to being friends and then fighting off & on, I did some very bad things in schools , I started liking girls and had no idea what I was doing , I really loved dancing growing up but didn't feel much support from both my friends and family , I would go to school dancing with girls and it was very inappropriate dancing that I was doing , which at the time I didn't know was wrong. I wasn't happy growing up, besides going on vacation, hanging out with family, and from elementary school all the way up to high school, all the way to 9th grade (which was last year or two). I struggled daily, I started watching porn at a very young age, I started masturbating at a young age, I started watching inappropriate movies & shows at a young age, lusting, committing sexual sin, and it was years of all of this, but I didn't tell anyone, I would want to fit in with other people, struggling with self-image constantly, hated the way I looked, and hated really everything about who I was. Everything was a problem between me and my loved ones, I would argue about everything (and this was my fault not theirs) with my parents and didn't honor them like I should. I had bad anxiety, stress, and many strongholds that were getting to me. There was this time I was very mad, that I hid in the bathroom, I started cutting myself or at least trying to cut myself with scissors, but it didn't work, I was in pain because of a situation that happened and it really got to me. And I didn't realize... Satan was attacking me this whole entire time. I really was holding many grudges against everyone, even people I didn't know, I was very unhappy tbh , very rude & disrespectful towards everyone!! I wasn't even honest about stuff like this but I really wanted to share this... I was too prideful and very ignorant about everything, and it is true.
But Jesus really broke all OF THESE chains ⛓️⛓️❤️❤️❤️🙌🙌🙌 I no longer have a grudge on people that affected me and I want to forgive those who have hurt me deeply, and it is a struggle but it helps to get it off of my shoulders and to help the situation. He really is a chain breaker though ya'll!! And He freed me from every demonic spirit that was taking a hold of my life, 🥰 attacking me every way possible, no matter how many times I tried. But Jesus was there. He called me to a Christian concert last year in August, I was crying, after being saved, I felt very convicted when going back to my old ways, I cried really hard when I have ever fallen into temptation. I felt joy and much peace that I have never felt before and it was wonderful.
I do love to get out there and help others with any struggles possible, whether you are struggling with sin, attacks from the enemy, anxiety, or any strong hold!! I love to help people out a lot, even though sometimes it's hard because people get to you when you at least try. I love running 🏃🏼♀️, cooking 🍳 is fun too lol, love leading others to Christ but not on my own strength but the strength Christ has given me, love reading my Bible 📖 and learning more about Jesus 🤍 and who He truly is, love fellowship, God's creation as in sunsets 🌅, His animals 🐎🐈🐕, love feeding the homeless and talking to them 🫂, I just really love getting out there and to love others. Correcting my loved ones when they are wrong in any situation because I love and care for them, being there for them even if they aren't struggling or... struggling.
And yes, all of that is great but I still struggle, you all know, there are consequences of sin. And I do struggle with evil thoughts, I struggle with telling others about Jesus because of how nervous or afraid I am, I struggle with obeying Him, I struggle with reading His word daily, I struggle doing things for others even if I don't want to. At times I feel far from God, I still cry and I still go through pain, get tired, get lazy, anxious, etc. And that is why I don't want to brag about my love for God because I fail Him daily but His love is unconditional and is everlasting, and that is all I can brag about which is, His love for me. And He said He will be there with us when we struggle, but He didn't say we don't go through struggles when we accept Him, because we will!! But we have to focus on Him when in any storm 🌪️⛈️, otherwise we will sink!! God loves us so much, and it's a love none of us can think or even imagine 💖.
And I really hope this spoke to you, I understand many things can be uncomfortable to share and not “everything should be shared on the internet.” But this is very important and it is great to share... Jesus can break any chains ⛓️⛓️, any strongholds. He died on the cross ✝️ for every demonic spirit affecting us to be broken!! All single infirmities have been broken when Jesus died on that cross‼️‼️
And I really pray that every single one of you reading this, that every demonic spirit, will be cast out in Jesus’ name ❤️❤️⛓️⛓️💪
Love you all and God bless you 💕🙌
Ella
And this may be hard to read to some because of what happened but I really want to share with others, without getting put down, and just because I want to show that you are not alone, and to simply just confess what I have done in the past rather than covering it all up, of every bad mistake & choice I have made. ☹️
So, I really had a huge grudge on a few people growing up, because what they have done to me physically & emotionally. And because of holding that grudge against them, because of being not cared for and being molested, it really really took a toll on me and it really didn't help with the situation... and I have grew up as a kid where people think less of me because I was “too young” and I was put in a grade above my age average , if that makes sense? People really put me down continuously, I was bullied at a young age, got made fun of because of my voice, because of the way I appeared to be, always judged for the outward appearances. Always getting in trouble from and out of school, got in school fights with kids that were not even my age or below my age average, I know now that all these years it was the evil one blinding me and getting to me in every situation in my life.
Everyone hated the way I was, so I tried to fit in and be like the popular kids, and try to be like them so I can get the attention I need. It really didn't work and I really struggled , I was blind spiritually and Satan has controlled my life and attacked me all these years , I had many “friends”, we would go back to being friends and then fighting off & on, I did some very bad things in schools , I started liking girls and had no idea what I was doing , I really loved dancing growing up but didn't feel much support from both my friends and family , I would go to school dancing with girls and it was very inappropriate dancing that I was doing , which at the time I didn't know was wrong. I wasn't happy growing up, besides going on vacation, hanging out with family, and from elementary school all the way up to high school, all the way to 9th grade (which was last year or two). I struggled daily, I started watching porn at a very young age, I started masturbating at a young age, I started watching inappropriate movies & shows at a young age, lusting, committing sexual sin, and it was years of all of this, but I didn't tell anyone, I would want to fit in with other people, struggling with self-image constantly, hated the way I looked, and hated really everything about who I was. Everything was a problem between me and my loved ones, I would argue about everything (and this was my fault not theirs) with my parents and didn't honor them like I should. I had bad anxiety, stress, and many strongholds that were getting to me. There was this time I was very mad, that I hid in the bathroom, I started cutting myself or at least trying to cut myself with scissors, but it didn't work, I was in pain because of a situation that happened and it really got to me. And I didn't realize... Satan was attacking me this whole entire time. I really was holding many grudges against everyone, even people I didn't know, I was very unhappy tbh , very rude & disrespectful towards everyone!! I wasn't even honest about stuff like this but I really wanted to share this... I was too prideful and very ignorant about everything, and it is true.
But Jesus really broke all OF THESE chains ⛓️⛓️❤️❤️❤️🙌🙌🙌 I no longer have a grudge on people that affected me and I want to forgive those who have hurt me deeply, and it is a struggle but it helps to get it off of my shoulders and to help the situation. He really is a chain breaker though ya'll!! And He freed me from every demonic spirit that was taking a hold of my life, 🥰 attacking me every way possible, no matter how many times I tried. But Jesus was there. He called me to a Christian concert last year in August, I was crying, after being saved, I felt very convicted when going back to my old ways, I cried really hard when I have ever fallen into temptation. I felt joy and much peace that I have never felt before and it was wonderful.
I do love to get out there and help others with any struggles possible, whether you are struggling with sin, attacks from the enemy, anxiety, or any strong hold!! I love to help people out a lot, even though sometimes it's hard because people get to you when you at least try. I love running 🏃🏼♀️, cooking 🍳 is fun too lol, love leading others to Christ but not on my own strength but the strength Christ has given me, love reading my Bible 📖 and learning more about Jesus 🤍 and who He truly is, love fellowship, God's creation as in sunsets 🌅, His animals 🐎🐈🐕, love feeding the homeless and talking to them 🫂, I just really love getting out there and to love others. Correcting my loved ones when they are wrong in any situation because I love and care for them, being there for them even if they aren't struggling or... struggling.
And yes, all of that is great but I still struggle, you all know, there are consequences of sin. And I do struggle with evil thoughts, I struggle with telling others about Jesus because of how nervous or afraid I am, I struggle with obeying Him, I struggle with reading His word daily, I struggle doing things for others even if I don't want to. At times I feel far from God, I still cry and I still go through pain, get tired, get lazy, anxious, etc. And that is why I don't want to brag about my love for God because I fail Him daily but His love is unconditional and is everlasting, and that is all I can brag about which is, His love for me. And He said He will be there with us when we struggle, but He didn't say we don't go through struggles when we accept Him, because we will!! But we have to focus on Him when in any storm 🌪️⛈️, otherwise we will sink!! God loves us so much, and it's a love none of us can think or even imagine 💖.
And I really hope this spoke to you, I understand many things can be uncomfortable to share and not “everything should be shared on the internet.” But this is very important and it is great to share... Jesus can break any chains ⛓️⛓️, any strongholds. He died on the cross ✝️ for every demonic spirit affecting us to be broken!! All single infirmities have been broken when Jesus died on that cross‼️‼️
And I really pray that every single one of you reading this, that every demonic spirit, will be cast out in Jesus’ name ❤️❤️⛓️⛓️💪
Love you all and God bless you 💕🙌
Ella
"Be Still and Know that I Am God" (Psalm 46:10) is one of the most quoted verses from the Bible. Yet, do we actually live it out?
In a society where people are always running from one thing to the next - chasing after the next promotion, the next paycheck, the next relationship, the next sports game, the next party - do we have time to "Be Still?" First we ought to be still, and then alone can we "Know". First we sit at the feet of Jesus, like Mary, and then we can serve like Martha. The still, small voice that Elijah heard, required his quietness, his rest, and his silence first.
May we make sure that we have time to be still and to know that He is God, not forsaking to enter into His presence daily
-Steph
Note from Shay:
I recently enrolled in YWAM DTS (Discipleship Training School) because God gave me the clear calling that he wants me to take care of children in undeveloped countries, counsel women and build in my faith. I’m currently at the school and will do the lecture phase which will last 3 months until I go to the outreach location which is going to be in a foreign country. Through one of my closest mentors, John Redding and a GoFundMe page, I got enough funds to go to DTS with Chico YWAM. DTS YWAM teaches us the fundamentals of building faith, info about the Bible, and God’s promises on a more intimate level so the students can do more successful mission work. I am hoping to do more educational programs someday even after I graduate from YWAM DTS.
Thank you so much for your support. Our world needs Jesus!
Love, Shay
I recently enrolled in YWAM DTS (Discipleship Training School) because God gave me the clear calling that he wants me to take care of children in undeveloped countries, counsel women and build in my faith. I’m currently at the school and will do the lecture phase which will last 3 months until I go to the outreach location which is going to be in a foreign country. Through one of my closest mentors, John Redding and a GoFundMe page, I got enough funds to go to DTS with Chico YWAM. DTS YWAM teaches us the fundamentals of building faith, info about the Bible, and God’s promises on a more intimate level so the students can do more successful mission work. I am hoping to do more educational programs someday even after I graduate from YWAM DTS.
Thank you so much for your support. Our world needs Jesus!
Love, Shay
The other night, I was staying up alone, thinking. The house was quiet. I was rather calm at first, but as I began to replay the last few days’ events in my head, I started to get myself worked up. Everything in our life was upside down: nothing was right. Or, at least, what I thought was right. I was tired of struggling within myself and having to do the right thing all the time. I was so sick of being the good child.
Because being good often means sacrifice.
If what you’re thinking right now is: oh, you poor dear! Well, please don’t. Let me assure you, I’m a complete brat. My so-called “sacrifice” here is absolutely pathetic in comparison to the incredible, literally life-altering sacrifice that Jesus made for us when He gave himself up to die on the cross. I mean, He didn’t have to let those men capture Him and drag Him to Caesar. He was perfectly capable of summoning lightning to strike them down, or fire from Heaven to burn them to a crisp.
But instead, He looked ahead to the future. He saw you and me and all the people before us, and He decided to give himself up so that we could live someday. So that we could know the grace, mercy, and true life that we were meant to. His was the ultimate sacrifice.
Whenever I listen to OneRepublic’s song “Stop and Stare”, I have to slow down and take a deep breath. There’s something about that song that just makes me…well, stop and stare. 😉
Stop and stare
I think I’m moving, but I go nowhere
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you’re here, not there
And you’d give anything to get what’s fair
But fair ain’t what you really need
Oh, do you see what I see?
What we think is fair, or the perfect life, isn’t what we need. We need to learn our lessons, fight our Inner Battles, and become better people through it. These teenage years won’t last forever, but our desire to serve and praise God will never end.
I had a hard time that night, but what made me suck it up was the fact that Jesus’ sacrifice was greater. And there are people in this world who are really suffering, not just struggling within themselves like I was. There are people going hungry, dying from cancer, and living a very real, very dangerous lifestyle.
I don’t really listen to Christian music often–try never–but I really like the band 1 Girl Nation. The song Count Your Rainbows is my favorite of theirs. 🙂
The hands that paint the sky, and lift the sun to rise
Will keep on holding you close through every season
Mercy and morning light, breaks through the darkest night
So, keep believing no matter what you’re seeing
My problems just seem so incredibly small in the light of Jesus’ sacrifice and mercy. He has done so much for me, and yet I have the audacity to complain.
1 Chronicles 29: 10-13 says this,
Therefore, David blessed the LORD in the presence of all the assembly. And David said: “Blessed are you, O LORD, the God of Israel our Father, forever and ever. Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O LORD, and you are exalted as head above all. Both riches and honor come from you, and you rule over all. In your hand are power and might, and in your hand, it is to make great and to give strength to all. And now we thank You, our God, and praise your glorious name.”
So let us not dwell on what might have been, or the things that we wished were happening in our lives. Be grateful for what you have in this moment and don’t spend your time worrying about tomorrow. Pray and seek the LORD, and He will hear. Don’t doubt Him or His might. If He takes such good care of the flowers, how much better will He take care of you!
Maranda 15 – Ireland
Because being good often means sacrifice.
If what you’re thinking right now is: oh, you poor dear! Well, please don’t. Let me assure you, I’m a complete brat. My so-called “sacrifice” here is absolutely pathetic in comparison to the incredible, literally life-altering sacrifice that Jesus made for us when He gave himself up to die on the cross. I mean, He didn’t have to let those men capture Him and drag Him to Caesar. He was perfectly capable of summoning lightning to strike them down, or fire from Heaven to burn them to a crisp.
But instead, He looked ahead to the future. He saw you and me and all the people before us, and He decided to give himself up so that we could live someday. So that we could know the grace, mercy, and true life that we were meant to. His was the ultimate sacrifice.
Whenever I listen to OneRepublic’s song “Stop and Stare”, I have to slow down and take a deep breath. There’s something about that song that just makes me…well, stop and stare. 😉
Stop and stare
I think I’m moving, but I go nowhere
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you’re here, not there
And you’d give anything to get what’s fair
But fair ain’t what you really need
Oh, do you see what I see?
What we think is fair, or the perfect life, isn’t what we need. We need to learn our lessons, fight our Inner Battles, and become better people through it. These teenage years won’t last forever, but our desire to serve and praise God will never end.
I had a hard time that night, but what made me suck it up was the fact that Jesus’ sacrifice was greater. And there are people in this world who are really suffering, not just struggling within themselves like I was. There are people going hungry, dying from cancer, and living a very real, very dangerous lifestyle.
I don’t really listen to Christian music often–try never–but I really like the band 1 Girl Nation. The song Count Your Rainbows is my favorite of theirs. 🙂
The hands that paint the sky, and lift the sun to rise
Will keep on holding you close through every season
Mercy and morning light, breaks through the darkest night
So, keep believing no matter what you’re seeing
My problems just seem so incredibly small in the light of Jesus’ sacrifice and mercy. He has done so much for me, and yet I have the audacity to complain.
1 Chronicles 29: 10-13 says this,
Therefore, David blessed the LORD in the presence of all the assembly. And David said: “Blessed are you, O LORD, the God of Israel our Father, forever and ever. Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O LORD, and you are exalted as head above all. Both riches and honor come from you, and you rule over all. In your hand are power and might, and in your hand, it is to make great and to give strength to all. And now we thank You, our God, and praise your glorious name.”
So let us not dwell on what might have been, or the things that we wished were happening in our lives. Be grateful for what you have in this moment and don’t spend your time worrying about tomorrow. Pray and seek the LORD, and He will hear. Don’t doubt Him or His might. If He takes such good care of the flowers, how much better will He take care of you!
Maranda 15 – Ireland
I come from a single-parent family. My parents got divorced when I was five years old. I was not brought up as a Christian and didn't know the Lord personally. During my childhood, love felt scarce, as my mother had to work three jobs to support four young kids.
During my teenage years I felt so empty and loveless that I began experimenting with many things teenagers experiment with in order to find some love or acceptance. I ended up doing a lot of things that pulled me further away from God and I led a very sinful life for a very long time. I was also self-destructive and had to go to therapy as doctors thought I had a risk of committing suicide.
I tried very hard to find love anywhere I could, but no matter what I did, I always felt even more empty and unloved. I always felt like I was running away or chasing after something. I had my heart broken countless times as I placed my trust in all the wrong places.
Back then, I didn't believe in a loving God at all, as I had always felt that God wouldn't let me suffer this much if He did love me. I was angry all the time, I hated the world, I hated my life and worst of all, I hated who I had become.
My big turnaround did not come until late 2009. It was my second year of my undergraduate degree studies, and I had suffered tremendously when I came over to Australia. Stripped from my comfort in Singapore, my friends and my life, I was left to support myself financially as well as succeed in a demanding science degree.
I was stuck in an emotionally-abusive, manipulative long-distance relationship and one night, I thought I couldn't take it anymore. Everything was too much for me, and I remember the night I was brought down to my knees, at last.
The challenge
With all the strength and heart I could muster, I asked "God, if you are really there like you say you are, be here for me. I can't take it anymore. I am going to do something really drastic if you don't meet me here. I am nothing and I need you."
Suddenly I felt a supernatural kind of feeling that overcame me. I truly experienced God in the most remarkable way. I felt a kind of overwhelming sense of peace, a kind of feeling like you were being hugged by something or someone that wasn't physical. It felt supernatural to me.
Immediately I rose from my knees, took a Bible out and I was led to read this passage from 1 Peter chapter 4 verse 12-13: "Dear friends, don't be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. Instead, be very glad “for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world".
At that point of time, I didn't know what the verse meant. But I knew one thing; my suffering in life had a purpose, even if I didn't know what that purpose was yet. I slept peacefully, something that I hadn't been able to do for a very long time.
One year from that fateful night I accepted Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. Now I have been a Christian for nearly three years and I never can forget that night. So much has happened since then. It took time, but in faith, I saw God's plan and purpose for me slowly unfold. I found a personal love in Christ and Christ in me, and over all the bad times I've had since I never ever felt empty or loveless again because the love of God became so evident in my life through Christ.
It was that night
Even though I officially became a Christian three years ago, I knew instantly in my heart, I accepted Christ that very night, in my room, all alone and broken. God found me when I had nothing left to bear or give, when I thought my life was no longer worth living. God literally saved me.
Now, I have met the most loving, most doting, most wonderful man in my life. Christ is my first love, but I have found my earthly love in my husband to-be in a few short days’ time. I am overwhelmed by the love God has bestowed upon me, and that would have been more than enough for me. But God always give more than we ask for, and He blessed me with someone who loves me in a way I never thought was possible.
So, the love of God for me is something so real, that when I think about it, I feel this sense of purpose and hope in my heart that is so overwhelmingly filled with something so incredible. And to be able to share this is my greatest pleasure and honor.
I know that God's love for me is supreme, because I have been convinced that nothing can ever separate me from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither my fears for today nor my worries about tomorrow--not even the powers of hell can separate me from God's love (Romans chapter 8 verse 38).
Clarissa - Singapore/ Perth Australia
During my teenage years I felt so empty and loveless that I began experimenting with many things teenagers experiment with in order to find some love or acceptance. I ended up doing a lot of things that pulled me further away from God and I led a very sinful life for a very long time. I was also self-destructive and had to go to therapy as doctors thought I had a risk of committing suicide.
I tried very hard to find love anywhere I could, but no matter what I did, I always felt even more empty and unloved. I always felt like I was running away or chasing after something. I had my heart broken countless times as I placed my trust in all the wrong places.
Back then, I didn't believe in a loving God at all, as I had always felt that God wouldn't let me suffer this much if He did love me. I was angry all the time, I hated the world, I hated my life and worst of all, I hated who I had become.
My big turnaround did not come until late 2009. It was my second year of my undergraduate degree studies, and I had suffered tremendously when I came over to Australia. Stripped from my comfort in Singapore, my friends and my life, I was left to support myself financially as well as succeed in a demanding science degree.
I was stuck in an emotionally-abusive, manipulative long-distance relationship and one night, I thought I couldn't take it anymore. Everything was too much for me, and I remember the night I was brought down to my knees, at last.
The challenge
With all the strength and heart I could muster, I asked "God, if you are really there like you say you are, be here for me. I can't take it anymore. I am going to do something really drastic if you don't meet me here. I am nothing and I need you."
Suddenly I felt a supernatural kind of feeling that overcame me. I truly experienced God in the most remarkable way. I felt a kind of overwhelming sense of peace, a kind of feeling like you were being hugged by something or someone that wasn't physical. It felt supernatural to me.
Immediately I rose from my knees, took a Bible out and I was led to read this passage from 1 Peter chapter 4 verse 12-13: "Dear friends, don't be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. Instead, be very glad “for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world".
At that point of time, I didn't know what the verse meant. But I knew one thing; my suffering in life had a purpose, even if I didn't know what that purpose was yet. I slept peacefully, something that I hadn't been able to do for a very long time.
One year from that fateful night I accepted Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. Now I have been a Christian for nearly three years and I never can forget that night. So much has happened since then. It took time, but in faith, I saw God's plan and purpose for me slowly unfold. I found a personal love in Christ and Christ in me, and over all the bad times I've had since I never ever felt empty or loveless again because the love of God became so evident in my life through Christ.
It was that night
Even though I officially became a Christian three years ago, I knew instantly in my heart, I accepted Christ that very night, in my room, all alone and broken. God found me when I had nothing left to bear or give, when I thought my life was no longer worth living. God literally saved me.
Now, I have met the most loving, most doting, most wonderful man in my life. Christ is my first love, but I have found my earthly love in my husband to-be in a few short days’ time. I am overwhelmed by the love God has bestowed upon me, and that would have been more than enough for me. But God always give more than we ask for, and He blessed me with someone who loves me in a way I never thought was possible.
So, the love of God for me is something so real, that when I think about it, I feel this sense of purpose and hope in my heart that is so overwhelmingly filled with something so incredible. And to be able to share this is my greatest pleasure and honor.
I know that God's love for me is supreme, because I have been convinced that nothing can ever separate me from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither my fears for today nor my worries about tomorrow--not even the powers of hell can separate me from God's love (Romans chapter 8 verse 38).
Clarissa - Singapore/ Perth Australia
"Sierra's Story"
Here’s my self-worth story ❤️
This has taken me a while to finally let out but I believe God has given me strength now 🙌🏼 when I was in middle school I struggled with serious depression and anxiety. Not many family or friends could tell but from the inside I was drowning. I struggled to understand my purpose in life and felt worthless. From middle school into my freshman year of high school I gained an eating disorder, I hardly ate, I layed around a lot and sleep through the biggest part of the day. I had an incredible family, who loved me with everything in them but Satan had me blocked from feeling that love and affection. I felt alone and angry all the time, and I wished life would just stop. I tried everything to fill the void in my heart from bad relationships all the way to risky situations that could’ve got me in serious danger. My freshman year at church camp God used a very special friend of mine to show me my worth, we talked almost every day and I doubt she ever knew just how much of an impact she had on my life. I prayed and gave everything to God that week at camp! I’ve struggled yes, and the road hasn’t been easy, but what I can say is that God has been with me every step of the way and he never left me ❤️❤️ now I’m healing 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
The little boy had just turned 8 years old. Three months ago, he had given his heart to Jesus and he was so happy. Today, he was standing by third base watching a baseball game at school. He loved baseball. His attention diverted momentarily to something else in the school yard and he didn’t notice the big kid who had come up to bat. Suddenly, his friend Chuck yelled at him to duck. He turned, just in time to be hit full force in the right side of the head by a line drive. Everything went black and he slumped to the ground.
When he came to, the baseball team had gathered around him. His head hurt and his face was numb. He was sent home and his mother took him to the hospital. He was checked over by the emergency room doctor and x-rays were taken. They were told that nothing was broken and that the swelling would subside in a day or so. The little boy was sent home.
The incident was soon forgotten and life went on. The little boy loved sports, especially street hockey and riding his bike. He also loved music. He played a keyboard and was pretty good at it. Over that summer, the little boy started having dizzy spells, headaches and weakness. Sometimes he would lose his balance for no reason. He would fall off his bike resulting in a lot of skinned knees. He would forget things and sometimes his left hand couldn’t keep up with his right when playing the piano.
In the fall, he was excited about starting the third grade with all his friends. He loved school and someday wanted to be a medical missionary. Trick or treating was going to be really fun that year. On that night, he was out with friends running around the neighborhood collecting lots of goodies. Suddenly the little boy started losing his coordination and he tripped on his costume, tearing it. He was very tired and called it a night. The next day after school he was too exhausted to play street hockey. That evening he started to develop a headache over his right eye. It got so bad he wanted to scream. He became sick to his stomach and the vision in his right eye started fading in and out. What was happening? Thinking he’d over done it with all the trick or treating excitement his parents put him to bed.
At 5:00 am the little boy woke up with horrible nausea. He was blind in his left eye and the left side of his body was limp like a rag doll. He was paralyzed. His parents heard him moaning and rushed him to the hospital. He faded in and out of consciousness. There were lights, doctors and nurses, technicians, tubes, needles, sirens, IV poles, stretchers, flashes, dark, noise, quiet, cold, warm, red, white a mixed blur, then - nothing.
When the little boy opened his eyes, he was so tired he couldn’t lift his head. He was in a big bed. There were curtains around him and blurry lights. There was bandages and gauze from his right ear down the right side of his neck. He recognized whispering voices of his Mom and Dad beside him. They were praying for him.
Their little boy was in the Neurological Intensive Care Unit at the world-renowned Hospital for Sick Children after suffering a massive stroke. He had a blood clot in an artery leading to his brain and had just undergone emergency surgery. One of the most prominent pediatric neuro surgeons in the world was attending their little son and was gently preparing them for the worst. Death was imminent.
Hours in the ICU blurred into days for the little boy. He was then moved to the neurosurgical ward. He was paralyzed but more aware of his surroundings. The kid in the next bed was Joey. Joey had a brain tumor the size of a lemon. He would scream and cry all night and moan all day. The little boy would pray for him but Joey died on the operating table in a few days. The next roommate was in the same condition. The ward was filled with little kids with tumors, brain hemorrhages and aneurysms. The little boy’s Mom would visit him every day. Sometimes she would put him in a wheelchair and push him through the hallways of little faces full of shaved heads, sunken eyes in their dark sockets staring back. It was a living nightmare. The sights and smells beyond description. The little boy was afraid to make any friends on the ward because friends seemed to die almost as fast as you made them. Every day, an endless routine of needles, tests and scans. Some under anesthesia with days of nausea and recovery. Nights of convulsions, fevers and lying in a wet bed for hours when overworked nurses were sometimes too busy to change soaked pajamas in the middle of the night.
The little boy didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him but one thing he did know for sure – Jesus was with him! He told his nurses about Jesus and even told one that he wasn’t afraid to die because Jesus was in his heart.
The little boy’s room soon filled up with cards, balloons and toys and tons of crayons. His Sunday school teacher visited, his Dad and brother came every evening but at 8:00 pm it was time to say goodnight. The hospital would get quieter as visitors left, but Jesus never left.
One day the neurosurgeons met with the little boy’s parents and told them that they had to perform a very risky surgical procedure. The morning of the surgery the little boy’s Mom and Dad were in his room praying with him then the OR team came to take him away. They kissed and said their goodbye’s knowing that their next meeting may be in heaven.
Ten hours later, the little boy woke up in the ICU with his head covered in bandages and sutures. The 8 hours of brain surgery had not gone well or brought the desired results. The surgeon told his parents that their little boy may never walk again because the neurological damage was so bad and permanent. They should consider placing him in a special facility for crippled children.
The little boy decided that life in a wheelchair was not going to be an option. He knew that Jesus could heal him. He went through grueling therapy and slowly learned to weight- bear and walk again. He had to be homeschooled for a while and despite some learning disabilities decided that he was not going to be held back. He would always have some balance problems but learned to ride a bike again and of course – play hockey.
Fast forward – there were more surgeries, and unbelievable rehab and years of ridicule but that little boy grew up. He studied accounting and had a successful career in that field (in a mission hospital!). He married a girl that he had met when they were only 6 years old. They look a lot different today because they just celebrated their 33rd anniversary. They raised two kids who now have their own careers and are serving God. He also knew that God had placed His call upon his life for Pastoral ministry. He devoted his life to the ministry and felt so blessed to be used by God. In 2012, he had to start to slow down a bit because of some neurological complications that began to show up again.
At that time, he started praying about what was next to be done for the Kingdom of God. A vision was birthed in his heart - Patch Ministries!!!
http://www.youthpatchministries.weebly.com/
Guys, that’s my story. I was that little boy.
Today I walk a bit funny and I have limited use of my left hand (I still play a mean keyboard) but in three words – GOD IS AWESOME!
If he can all that for me, he can do it for you.
Be encouraged and walk by faith. And never, ever give up!!!!!!!!!!!
Blessings always,
Pastor Glenn
When he came to, the baseball team had gathered around him. His head hurt and his face was numb. He was sent home and his mother took him to the hospital. He was checked over by the emergency room doctor and x-rays were taken. They were told that nothing was broken and that the swelling would subside in a day or so. The little boy was sent home.
The incident was soon forgotten and life went on. The little boy loved sports, especially street hockey and riding his bike. He also loved music. He played a keyboard and was pretty good at it. Over that summer, the little boy started having dizzy spells, headaches and weakness. Sometimes he would lose his balance for no reason. He would fall off his bike resulting in a lot of skinned knees. He would forget things and sometimes his left hand couldn’t keep up with his right when playing the piano.
In the fall, he was excited about starting the third grade with all his friends. He loved school and someday wanted to be a medical missionary. Trick or treating was going to be really fun that year. On that night, he was out with friends running around the neighborhood collecting lots of goodies. Suddenly the little boy started losing his coordination and he tripped on his costume, tearing it. He was very tired and called it a night. The next day after school he was too exhausted to play street hockey. That evening he started to develop a headache over his right eye. It got so bad he wanted to scream. He became sick to his stomach and the vision in his right eye started fading in and out. What was happening? Thinking he’d over done it with all the trick or treating excitement his parents put him to bed.
At 5:00 am the little boy woke up with horrible nausea. He was blind in his left eye and the left side of his body was limp like a rag doll. He was paralyzed. His parents heard him moaning and rushed him to the hospital. He faded in and out of consciousness. There were lights, doctors and nurses, technicians, tubes, needles, sirens, IV poles, stretchers, flashes, dark, noise, quiet, cold, warm, red, white a mixed blur, then - nothing.
When the little boy opened his eyes, he was so tired he couldn’t lift his head. He was in a big bed. There were curtains around him and blurry lights. There was bandages and gauze from his right ear down the right side of his neck. He recognized whispering voices of his Mom and Dad beside him. They were praying for him.
Their little boy was in the Neurological Intensive Care Unit at the world-renowned Hospital for Sick Children after suffering a massive stroke. He had a blood clot in an artery leading to his brain and had just undergone emergency surgery. One of the most prominent pediatric neuro surgeons in the world was attending their little son and was gently preparing them for the worst. Death was imminent.
Hours in the ICU blurred into days for the little boy. He was then moved to the neurosurgical ward. He was paralyzed but more aware of his surroundings. The kid in the next bed was Joey. Joey had a brain tumor the size of a lemon. He would scream and cry all night and moan all day. The little boy would pray for him but Joey died on the operating table in a few days. The next roommate was in the same condition. The ward was filled with little kids with tumors, brain hemorrhages and aneurysms. The little boy’s Mom would visit him every day. Sometimes she would put him in a wheelchair and push him through the hallways of little faces full of shaved heads, sunken eyes in their dark sockets staring back. It was a living nightmare. The sights and smells beyond description. The little boy was afraid to make any friends on the ward because friends seemed to die almost as fast as you made them. Every day, an endless routine of needles, tests and scans. Some under anesthesia with days of nausea and recovery. Nights of convulsions, fevers and lying in a wet bed for hours when overworked nurses were sometimes too busy to change soaked pajamas in the middle of the night.
The little boy didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him but one thing he did know for sure – Jesus was with him! He told his nurses about Jesus and even told one that he wasn’t afraid to die because Jesus was in his heart.
The little boy’s room soon filled up with cards, balloons and toys and tons of crayons. His Sunday school teacher visited, his Dad and brother came every evening but at 8:00 pm it was time to say goodnight. The hospital would get quieter as visitors left, but Jesus never left.
One day the neurosurgeons met with the little boy’s parents and told them that they had to perform a very risky surgical procedure. The morning of the surgery the little boy’s Mom and Dad were in his room praying with him then the OR team came to take him away. They kissed and said their goodbye’s knowing that their next meeting may be in heaven.
Ten hours later, the little boy woke up in the ICU with his head covered in bandages and sutures. The 8 hours of brain surgery had not gone well or brought the desired results. The surgeon told his parents that their little boy may never walk again because the neurological damage was so bad and permanent. They should consider placing him in a special facility for crippled children.
The little boy decided that life in a wheelchair was not going to be an option. He knew that Jesus could heal him. He went through grueling therapy and slowly learned to weight- bear and walk again. He had to be homeschooled for a while and despite some learning disabilities decided that he was not going to be held back. He would always have some balance problems but learned to ride a bike again and of course – play hockey.
Fast forward – there were more surgeries, and unbelievable rehab and years of ridicule but that little boy grew up. He studied accounting and had a successful career in that field (in a mission hospital!). He married a girl that he had met when they were only 6 years old. They look a lot different today because they just celebrated their 33rd anniversary. They raised two kids who now have their own careers and are serving God. He also knew that God had placed His call upon his life for Pastoral ministry. He devoted his life to the ministry and felt so blessed to be used by God. In 2012, he had to start to slow down a bit because of some neurological complications that began to show up again.
At that time, he started praying about what was next to be done for the Kingdom of God. A vision was birthed in his heart - Patch Ministries!!!
http://www.youthpatchministries.weebly.com/
Guys, that’s my story. I was that little boy.
Today I walk a bit funny and I have limited use of my left hand (I still play a mean keyboard) but in three words – GOD IS AWESOME!
If he can all that for me, he can do it for you.
Be encouraged and walk by faith. And never, ever give up!!!!!!!!!!!
Blessings always,
Pastor Glenn
Recently, my dearest friend, Sky, encouraged me to share my testimony as well as what make me so passionate about being pro-life.
Hi, my name is Eli Penick. I am a 30-year-old Ukrainian-born man and I am glad to be alive! 30 years ago, my biological parents welcomed me into the world.
My doctor learned that I was born with a condition called Spina bifida, which meant my spine had been split open and I needed to have surgery to close it. After my procedure was complete, my biological parents rejected me and decided not to take me home with them. I don’t understand why they would leave me behind, and I don’t think I will ever hear from them because I don’t have their contact information nor have any idea about their whereabouts.
After staying in the hospital for a few days, I was sent to an orphanage where there were a lot of kids who were also rejected by their families. The building I stayed in was like a haunted house. My caregiver directed me into a small bedroom, sat me down, and gave me some food which I spat out because I didn’t like the taste of it. I felt really uncomfortable being alone in a separate room without lights on.
During my stay in the orphanage, I observed very strange behavior amongst my caregivers and other kids living with me, so I decided to investigate. One of the most disturbing things I saw were kids being tied up in their beds and being slapped by their caregivers. As a young boy, I discovered that all kids weren’t allowed to go anywhere in public. Also, they weren’t allowed to have pets, however, I decided to sneak a couple animals with me from the street anyway.
Eventually, the orphanage director discovered all the pets around the orphanage and he wasn’t happy about it; he threatened to shoot them all with his own gun if nothing was done to exterminate them. The caregivers and the director of the orphanage refused to give the kids an education because they thought the kids didn’t have the capability to learn.
They were unable to give medical attention to anyone who became sick because they didn’t have enough medical supplies and many kids died as a result. My inspiration during my time in the orphanage was finding people who could be my friends, but no one was interested in being my friend. Instead, I was bullied by the vast majority of both caregivers and fellow kids and I have a permanent scar on my upper left arm because one of the kids bit me.
They said that I am not good enough to have friends or a family who could love me for who I am. During my whole time at the orphanage, all I wanted was to be loved and accepted for who I am, be shown compassion, and have someone who would care about me and know that I belong here in this world, but that was not the case.
I was beyond devastated by what people said about me and I suffered emotionally because of it.
In 2005, a nurse received a phone call that a couple from America were interested in adopting a boy and I. My caregivers showed excitement for both of us while we were in the process of being adopted. I had doubts as to how this new couple would perceive me and how they would treat me better than my caregivers. I thought they would reject me if they found out that I have Spina bifida.
When the new couple learned about my condition, the woman, who I am proud to call my mom, wasn’t sure if she was on board to adopt me, however, she was interested in a boy who didn’t have as severe health condition as mine.
One night, the Lord woke up my future mom and had a talk with her about getting me out of the orphanage. After my adoption process was completed, my new brother and I were officially coming to America with our new parents.
As we arrived in America, a few people from a Virginia Beach church called Kempsville Presbyterian Church welcomed my brother and I with a welcome sign, a lot of hugs, pictures, and other stuff. My parents introduced us to our new siblings who were eager to meet us. As a matter of fact, one of their daughters, who is now my sister, offered me a banana with excitement on her face, but then I looked at the banana and it looked rotten.
When it was time to get ready for church, everybody in my family was speaking English to me, but I didn’t know the language. So, I smiled, nodded, and pretended like I knew what they were saying. When my family and I arrived at church, I noticed a man standing in the parking lot to come greet me.
He told me that he is the senior pastor of Kempsville Presbyterian Church and that his church has been praying for my brother and I to arrive in America. I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about attending a church service because I never experienced this before in my lifetime nor did I thought God existed. I did have some interesting experiences as a boy growing up around Christianity in Ukraine.
For instance, a catholic priest was handing out wooden-cross necklaces to everyone and told us if you wear it, Jesus Christ lives in you, but if you don’t, you’ll go to Hell. I thought it was the stupidest thing I ever heard. When I was taking a bath, I lost my wooden-cross necklace and I panicked because I was not wearing it and I thought I was going to Hell.
Anyway, the more I came to church, the more I was able to learn about God, and in that moment, I asked Him to be a part of my life and He completely changed me.
My life wouldn’t be any better today if God didn’t open so many doors for me such as: meeting new people who are now my friends, signing up for school, doctors who provided medical care, a wheelchair to get around, being a part of many youth groups for community support, becoming a youth leader for middle school boys at my church, my first missions trip to New Orleans with YWAM people, doing missions work in Hampton Roads, helping provide food for the homeless people, having bible study in my school, and more.
When it came to attending several doctors’ appointments, I was not thrilled to go but it needed to be done. First, I had to get surgery on my feet because I was born with crooked feet and had to wear a cast for several weeks. Second, I had to have a lower back surgery because my back wasn’t straight. Third, my bladder was out of control and it needed to be fixed. Last but not least, I met a nephrologist who specializes in kidney care and treating kidney disease.
What I learned about my kidneys was that they were still functioning at a rate under 17%. A few months later, my nephrologist called my house and told my mom that my kidneys failed on me. I was devastated and I knew in that moment my life was in jeopardy and I had little chance of surviving.
Around September 2007, my nephrologist prepared to put me on dialysis while I was on the waiting list to receive a brand-new kidney. After Thanksgiving, I received a phone call from my nephrologist saying they found a kidney donor and it was a match. After my recovery, I took my time to thank God for keeping me alive because I wouldn’t be here today sharing my life with each of you for what He has done for me and why He did it without Him. Jeremiah 31:3 states: “The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.’” Throughout all of this, I didn’t think I would ever find someone who would love me and tell me that I matter. Even when people let me down, I thank the Lord for loving me and saving my life. If you are going through a mess, remember that God is here for you every step of the way like He did for me, and you’ll conquer anything with His help!
I’ve worked at Chick-Fil-A from 2011-2017.
I graduated from Hickory High with a certificate of completion in 2012, and I am currently on track to completing my GED.
I’ve been working at Cinema Cafe for almost 3 years and I am planning to quit hopefully soon.
I am praying for God to open up doors for me and possibly attend YWAM DTS for next year.
At this moment, I am looking for a career without a college degree that I would be passionate about. Sometime in the future, I would like to run for politics.
After living in the USA for 15 years, I got a call a from a friend of mine who wanted me to go to Ukraine with me and do missions work for the orphanages. While I was there, I was able to reconnect with my old friends as well as making new friends. l also found out last year that a friend of mine told me that she has information about my biological father, but unfortunately, nothing from my biological mother. I am going to try to take an opportunity to go back next summer to search for my biological dad and get to know him well while he is still alive. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t know that I am alive. #gladtobealive
Feel free to share my story!
Hi, my name is Eli Penick. I am a 30-year-old Ukrainian-born man and I am glad to be alive! 30 years ago, my biological parents welcomed me into the world.
My doctor learned that I was born with a condition called Spina bifida, which meant my spine had been split open and I needed to have surgery to close it. After my procedure was complete, my biological parents rejected me and decided not to take me home with them. I don’t understand why they would leave me behind, and I don’t think I will ever hear from them because I don’t have their contact information nor have any idea about their whereabouts.
After staying in the hospital for a few days, I was sent to an orphanage where there were a lot of kids who were also rejected by their families. The building I stayed in was like a haunted house. My caregiver directed me into a small bedroom, sat me down, and gave me some food which I spat out because I didn’t like the taste of it. I felt really uncomfortable being alone in a separate room without lights on.
During my stay in the orphanage, I observed very strange behavior amongst my caregivers and other kids living with me, so I decided to investigate. One of the most disturbing things I saw were kids being tied up in their beds and being slapped by their caregivers. As a young boy, I discovered that all kids weren’t allowed to go anywhere in public. Also, they weren’t allowed to have pets, however, I decided to sneak a couple animals with me from the street anyway.
Eventually, the orphanage director discovered all the pets around the orphanage and he wasn’t happy about it; he threatened to shoot them all with his own gun if nothing was done to exterminate them. The caregivers and the director of the orphanage refused to give the kids an education because they thought the kids didn’t have the capability to learn.
They were unable to give medical attention to anyone who became sick because they didn’t have enough medical supplies and many kids died as a result. My inspiration during my time in the orphanage was finding people who could be my friends, but no one was interested in being my friend. Instead, I was bullied by the vast majority of both caregivers and fellow kids and I have a permanent scar on my upper left arm because one of the kids bit me.
They said that I am not good enough to have friends or a family who could love me for who I am. During my whole time at the orphanage, all I wanted was to be loved and accepted for who I am, be shown compassion, and have someone who would care about me and know that I belong here in this world, but that was not the case.
I was beyond devastated by what people said about me and I suffered emotionally because of it.
In 2005, a nurse received a phone call that a couple from America were interested in adopting a boy and I. My caregivers showed excitement for both of us while we were in the process of being adopted. I had doubts as to how this new couple would perceive me and how they would treat me better than my caregivers. I thought they would reject me if they found out that I have Spina bifida.
When the new couple learned about my condition, the woman, who I am proud to call my mom, wasn’t sure if she was on board to adopt me, however, she was interested in a boy who didn’t have as severe health condition as mine.
One night, the Lord woke up my future mom and had a talk with her about getting me out of the orphanage. After my adoption process was completed, my new brother and I were officially coming to America with our new parents.
As we arrived in America, a few people from a Virginia Beach church called Kempsville Presbyterian Church welcomed my brother and I with a welcome sign, a lot of hugs, pictures, and other stuff. My parents introduced us to our new siblings who were eager to meet us. As a matter of fact, one of their daughters, who is now my sister, offered me a banana with excitement on her face, but then I looked at the banana and it looked rotten.
When it was time to get ready for church, everybody in my family was speaking English to me, but I didn’t know the language. So, I smiled, nodded, and pretended like I knew what they were saying. When my family and I arrived at church, I noticed a man standing in the parking lot to come greet me.
He told me that he is the senior pastor of Kempsville Presbyterian Church and that his church has been praying for my brother and I to arrive in America. I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about attending a church service because I never experienced this before in my lifetime nor did I thought God existed. I did have some interesting experiences as a boy growing up around Christianity in Ukraine.
For instance, a catholic priest was handing out wooden-cross necklaces to everyone and told us if you wear it, Jesus Christ lives in you, but if you don’t, you’ll go to Hell. I thought it was the stupidest thing I ever heard. When I was taking a bath, I lost my wooden-cross necklace and I panicked because I was not wearing it and I thought I was going to Hell.
Anyway, the more I came to church, the more I was able to learn about God, and in that moment, I asked Him to be a part of my life and He completely changed me.
My life wouldn’t be any better today if God didn’t open so many doors for me such as: meeting new people who are now my friends, signing up for school, doctors who provided medical care, a wheelchair to get around, being a part of many youth groups for community support, becoming a youth leader for middle school boys at my church, my first missions trip to New Orleans with YWAM people, doing missions work in Hampton Roads, helping provide food for the homeless people, having bible study in my school, and more.
When it came to attending several doctors’ appointments, I was not thrilled to go but it needed to be done. First, I had to get surgery on my feet because I was born with crooked feet and had to wear a cast for several weeks. Second, I had to have a lower back surgery because my back wasn’t straight. Third, my bladder was out of control and it needed to be fixed. Last but not least, I met a nephrologist who specializes in kidney care and treating kidney disease.
What I learned about my kidneys was that they were still functioning at a rate under 17%. A few months later, my nephrologist called my house and told my mom that my kidneys failed on me. I was devastated and I knew in that moment my life was in jeopardy and I had little chance of surviving.
Around September 2007, my nephrologist prepared to put me on dialysis while I was on the waiting list to receive a brand-new kidney. After Thanksgiving, I received a phone call from my nephrologist saying they found a kidney donor and it was a match. After my recovery, I took my time to thank God for keeping me alive because I wouldn’t be here today sharing my life with each of you for what He has done for me and why He did it without Him. Jeremiah 31:3 states: “The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.’” Throughout all of this, I didn’t think I would ever find someone who would love me and tell me that I matter. Even when people let me down, I thank the Lord for loving me and saving my life. If you are going through a mess, remember that God is here for you every step of the way like He did for me, and you’ll conquer anything with His help!
I’ve worked at Chick-Fil-A from 2011-2017.
I graduated from Hickory High with a certificate of completion in 2012, and I am currently on track to completing my GED.
I’ve been working at Cinema Cafe for almost 3 years and I am planning to quit hopefully soon.
I am praying for God to open up doors for me and possibly attend YWAM DTS for next year.
At this moment, I am looking for a career without a college degree that I would be passionate about. Sometime in the future, I would like to run for politics.
After living in the USA for 15 years, I got a call a from a friend of mine who wanted me to go to Ukraine with me and do missions work for the orphanages. While I was there, I was able to reconnect with my old friends as well as making new friends. l also found out last year that a friend of mine told me that she has information about my biological father, but unfortunately, nothing from my biological mother. I am going to try to take an opportunity to go back next summer to search for my biological dad and get to know him well while he is still alive. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t know that I am alive. #gladtobealive
Feel free to share my story!
Sky's Story
Hi my name is Skyla Voorhes, but all my friends call me Sky! I’m 20 years old and I’m pro-life and happy to be a part of the GladToBeAlive campaign. I wasn’t going to share my story but I decided to do so to help get the ball rolling and hopefully to encourage others to share their stories as well!
My mom had me at 16 while my dad was 18. My parents never got married. Both of my parents were involved in drugs. I remember my dad going to jail and my mom trying her best to raise me. By the time I turned 3 years old I was living in many different places. Constantly shuffling around to what was most convenient for my parents. Eventually my dad signed custody over to my Great Aunt. Basically, my dad’s Aunt. It wasn’t that long after that things got worse.
In 2006 my dad died on the couch from a drug overdose. The night he died I was spending the night with them. They would have me on the weekends. My mom was in such a rush to get me to school that she thought he was asleep. It wasn’t until I came home after school when I found out my dad had died.
Things at my Aunts house weren’t any better. She would take me to the bar all of the time because she worked there. And when I wasn’t there with her, I was either at school or home alone. I never was taught hygiene. I often would go to school in the same old dirty clothes. At one point my bed was a dog bed. I spent every single night wetting the bed and then having to sleep in it the next day because no one was there to take care of me. I sometimes would even eat dog treats when I was hungry. And when I had company it would be her son who also lived with us. He physically abused me and at one point made me do sexually activities with him.
Between the ages of 7-8 my Aunts other children would come to spend more time with us. Her other son began to sexually abuse me. I’m between her one son sexually abusing me the other would be physically abusing me. It wasn’t long after I was brought to the police who then helped me get out that situation.
In the summer of 2008, I went into the foster system. From there things didn’t exactly get better. My first adoption home I was put in was going very well until one day the dad decided to touch me. I eventually told my daycare which reported it. I was immediately taken out of that home and placed in a different house. I spent the 4-5 years going between families. I was put in another adoption home which also didn’t work out. Eventually I moved to Virginia to get adopted by the amazing family that I have now!
Even though I got adopted life didn’t just get easier. I suffered severe depression at one point where I had to be put in a mental facility for cutting and wanting to harm myself. I later discovered that I had severe PTSD. I spent the next years working through all of my trauma.
But my life isn’t all bad. After going on my first mission trip I decided to give my life to Jesus. I went on a couple of mission trips afterwards. The family that adopted weren’t Christians but because of my belief, Jesus was able to work through me and now my mom is a Christian. We even pray every single night before meals. All I did was talk about how much I love Jesus. I also went to work at a summer Christian camp with horses. Before my freshman year of high school, I applied for an art school and got in. I spent the next two years there learning a lot. After that I went to a technical school for early childhood education. There I became the FCCLA Officer of Community Outreach for my whole school where I organized a food bank along with many other events. I got an internship at an elementary school where I work in an inclusion class. At the end of those two years I got a certification. I graduated in 2019 from Granby High School. Now I spend most of my days working in a barn, creating art, and being politically and religiously active. I know people have experienced way worse than me but I’m not sharing my story for a pity party. I wanted to share because IM GLAD TO BE ALIVE.
Despite all that I went through I wouldn’t change a thing. Satan may have intended for some of those things to harm me but my God, Jesus, is turning them into something beautiful. Something he can use to reach others. I KNOW God formed me when I was in the womb. I’m living proof along with many other people that I know that you can overcome hardship and adversity. God has a plan for everyone if we let him. We shouldn’t abort a baby because they might suffer. Sin will always be in the world. Give God a chance to turn hardship and sin into something for his Glory.
Psalms 139:13-16
“For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”
(check out Skyla's Place on our Word Launch page )
Hello everybody,
Greetings from Wellington, New Zealand. As a Christian teenager, I would like to tell you what has been happening in my life so far. I am very grateful to have been brought up in this church according to the laws of the Bible. There are few good role models out there to which we can turn for guidance and I find that many teenagers are uncertain about their future. I worry about some of my friends and other young people who are teenagers nowadays because they don’t really have many examples to look up to anymore. Most parents also don’t set a good example and many teenagers don’t grow up with good morals.
For me, as a Christian, Jesus Christ is the perfect role model. I feel secure knowing that I can be like Jesus and do well in life. Although many won’t admit it, going out to parties, taking drugs, drinking, etc. is just a way to fill up the emptiness in their life. There is something missing in your life if you don’t have God! Although you can’t avoid making mistakes, following the example of Jesus is the only solution to problems.
Learning from the Bible and from those (our elders) who train me gives me the right motives for an uncertain future. I am learning about all sorts of issues; for example, how to manage my time and not to waste it, how to bring up children properly in the future, and other things.
Although rebellion seems like fun, I realize that there is nothing ‘out there’ to desire. Many don’t think logically anymore. You just have to ask yourself, “What will happen to me when I die?" Nobody really cares to think about this anymore, and most people believe there is nothing after death. But if that’s the case, what is the point of life? There is certainly going to be a Judgment Day after death, and to make it to Heaven you have to follow God!
As a Christian teenager I can say that IF you obey God there are no unnecessary burdens or worries. I’m constantly learning something new that will help me to be trained for a proper future in the Lord.
There is a lot to learn and there is a lot happening as we grow up into adults. Unlike many in the world I can be certain that, with obedience to the Lord, I can grow up following the example of Jesus and those who have gone before me. My purpose in life is to follow God and make it into Heaven.
"“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.”" Ecclesiastes 12:13
"Why don’t you decide to follow God’s plan for your life? What have you really got to lose?"
Love in Christ,
Amanda
Greetings from Wellington, New Zealand. As a Christian teenager, I would like to tell you what has been happening in my life so far. I am very grateful to have been brought up in this church according to the laws of the Bible. There are few good role models out there to which we can turn for guidance and I find that many teenagers are uncertain about their future. I worry about some of my friends and other young people who are teenagers nowadays because they don’t really have many examples to look up to anymore. Most parents also don’t set a good example and many teenagers don’t grow up with good morals.
For me, as a Christian, Jesus Christ is the perfect role model. I feel secure knowing that I can be like Jesus and do well in life. Although many won’t admit it, going out to parties, taking drugs, drinking, etc. is just a way to fill up the emptiness in their life. There is something missing in your life if you don’t have God! Although you can’t avoid making mistakes, following the example of Jesus is the only solution to problems.
Learning from the Bible and from those (our elders) who train me gives me the right motives for an uncertain future. I am learning about all sorts of issues; for example, how to manage my time and not to waste it, how to bring up children properly in the future, and other things.
Although rebellion seems like fun, I realize that there is nothing ‘out there’ to desire. Many don’t think logically anymore. You just have to ask yourself, “What will happen to me when I die?" Nobody really cares to think about this anymore, and most people believe there is nothing after death. But if that’s the case, what is the point of life? There is certainly going to be a Judgment Day after death, and to make it to Heaven you have to follow God!
As a Christian teenager I can say that IF you obey God there are no unnecessary burdens or worries. I’m constantly learning something new that will help me to be trained for a proper future in the Lord.
There is a lot to learn and there is a lot happening as we grow up into adults. Unlike many in the world I can be certain that, with obedience to the Lord, I can grow up following the example of Jesus and those who have gone before me. My purpose in life is to follow God and make it into Heaven.
"“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.”" Ecclesiastes 12:13
"Why don’t you decide to follow God’s plan for your life? What have you really got to lose?"
Love in Christ,
Amanda
Hello,
I would like to share what I experienced in my youth, and how God got me out of it.
My parents were converted to Christianity many years ago, before I was born. So, I grew up in a Christian Assembly and my parents taught me to believe in God. As I got older, I didn’t take time to read or pray any more. I spent more time around friends who were not Christians. When I was 15 years old, I started drinking and smoking. I started drinking heavily every weekend, mostly vodka. Sometimes I drank so much that I vomited blood. I was 16 years old the first time I tried marijuana with a friend, and it didn’t take long till we smoked it every day. After school, or work, I would go to my friend's to smoke weed. At first it was fun, but after a few months it was normal to have it daily and it wasn’t special anymore. Not long after that I started taking speed (amphetamine). You take it through your nose. I took this mostly on weekends. I also tried cocaine.
Often, I would take alcohol, marijuana and speed all in one evening. And I was smoking at least one pack of cigarettes each day. To finance it all I would sell some drugs. After a while I felt really empty, as if I didn’t have a heart anymore; it was terrible. I couldn’t stand being alone because of this feeling so I would meet up with my friends every day till late.
One day my parents and I watched a documentary called "To Hell and Back", where people tell their stories of how they died or went into a coma and saw hell. Their descriptions of hell were terrible, just like the Bible tells us (MATTHEW 24:51 ""there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."“) This documentary made me think about how I would definitely go to hell because I had sinned a lot against God (see REVELATION 21:8). I couldn’t see any way out of my dependency on drugs and alcohol so I asked God for help. That night whilst sleeping I had a dream in which it was very dark and I was outside on the street, and I saw a black spirit that killed me. The dream looked real. As I woke up, I was extremely awake like never before after a dream. I felt a demon in my room and started praying immediately; after a few minutes I felt that it was gone.
The next day I told my dad and sister what happened and they said they had also woken up in the night and known that something was in the house. I knew it was a warning from God that I should change my life, but I still didn’t change.
When I was 18, we had a big Assembly meeting in Holland, and I went there, too. I took some packs of cigarettes with me; what was strange was that I had no desire to smoke while I was together with Christians. Normally, I would get stomach pain if I didn’t smoke for a while, which wasn’t the case during my time with the Assembly.
At that time, I knew that I would go to hell, but I couldn’t see a way out my situation. One day I talked to Pastor Lars and told him everything that I had done. He looked at me and said that the best thing would be if I would move away, because of my friends and the drugs. So, I made the decision to go to Australia. For a long time, I couldn’t understand how I even made this decision, or why I said I’d go to Australia; but now I understand that it was through God’s great mercy (ROMANS 1:5).
From one day to the next I was healed from drug, alcohol and cigarette addictions. I left everything behind me, even my apprenticeship, and went to Australia for one year. I didn’t have any physical withdrawal! The Assembly people looked after me very well, and I’m very thankful for that. Now I live in Frankfurt and can finish my apprenticeship. Praise the LORD that he got me out of there and took away this emptiness. God blesses me often and looks after me, I would just like to give God the glory for the new life HE has given me.
In His Love,
Chris
I would like to share what I experienced in my youth, and how God got me out of it.
My parents were converted to Christianity many years ago, before I was born. So, I grew up in a Christian Assembly and my parents taught me to believe in God. As I got older, I didn’t take time to read or pray any more. I spent more time around friends who were not Christians. When I was 15 years old, I started drinking and smoking. I started drinking heavily every weekend, mostly vodka. Sometimes I drank so much that I vomited blood. I was 16 years old the first time I tried marijuana with a friend, and it didn’t take long till we smoked it every day. After school, or work, I would go to my friend's to smoke weed. At first it was fun, but after a few months it was normal to have it daily and it wasn’t special anymore. Not long after that I started taking speed (amphetamine). You take it through your nose. I took this mostly on weekends. I also tried cocaine.
Often, I would take alcohol, marijuana and speed all in one evening. And I was smoking at least one pack of cigarettes each day. To finance it all I would sell some drugs. After a while I felt really empty, as if I didn’t have a heart anymore; it was terrible. I couldn’t stand being alone because of this feeling so I would meet up with my friends every day till late.
One day my parents and I watched a documentary called "To Hell and Back", where people tell their stories of how they died or went into a coma and saw hell. Their descriptions of hell were terrible, just like the Bible tells us (MATTHEW 24:51 ""there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."“) This documentary made me think about how I would definitely go to hell because I had sinned a lot against God (see REVELATION 21:8). I couldn’t see any way out of my dependency on drugs and alcohol so I asked God for help. That night whilst sleeping I had a dream in which it was very dark and I was outside on the street, and I saw a black spirit that killed me. The dream looked real. As I woke up, I was extremely awake like never before after a dream. I felt a demon in my room and started praying immediately; after a few minutes I felt that it was gone.
The next day I told my dad and sister what happened and they said they had also woken up in the night and known that something was in the house. I knew it was a warning from God that I should change my life, but I still didn’t change.
When I was 18, we had a big Assembly meeting in Holland, and I went there, too. I took some packs of cigarettes with me; what was strange was that I had no desire to smoke while I was together with Christians. Normally, I would get stomach pain if I didn’t smoke for a while, which wasn’t the case during my time with the Assembly.
At that time, I knew that I would go to hell, but I couldn’t see a way out my situation. One day I talked to Pastor Lars and told him everything that I had done. He looked at me and said that the best thing would be if I would move away, because of my friends and the drugs. So, I made the decision to go to Australia. For a long time, I couldn’t understand how I even made this decision, or why I said I’d go to Australia; but now I understand that it was through God’s great mercy (ROMANS 1:5).
From one day to the next I was healed from drug, alcohol and cigarette addictions. I left everything behind me, even my apprenticeship, and went to Australia for one year. I didn’t have any physical withdrawal! The Assembly people looked after me very well, and I’m very thankful for that. Now I live in Frankfurt and can finish my apprenticeship. Praise the LORD that he got me out of there and took away this emptiness. God blesses me often and looks after me, I would just like to give God the glory for the new life HE has given me.
In His Love,
Chris
Hello,
My name is Johnny. I live in Melbourne, Australia and I am in year 10, which is my third last year of school. I would like to share with you all something that occurred to me a short while ago.
Most people these days regard Christians as snobbish or arrogant. The problem is that they don’t get the real picture, especially since a lot of so-called Christians these days only believe a few things from the Bible. For example, a lot of people nowadays say that miracles only happened during the Bible times and that these stopped a few hundred years ago. However, it is clearly stated in the Bible in MARK 16:18 "“They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.”"
This verse doesn’t say that miracles only happened in Jesus’ time. Miracles still happen today and there is proof of this right now. I myself have witnessed miracles and consider myself to have been very lucky to have grown up in this church where we have a Pastor who knows and cares for each and every one of us and constantly gives us the truth from God’s Word.
All the teenagers in this assembly are knitted together like brothers and sisters. We love spending time together doing things such as going to the surf and other fun related activities where we all join in; as well as being open with one another, telling each other our problems and learning about the Bible.
The members from the CAI are definitely not snobbish and my life in this assembly is the only one I would want to live. I feel like I’m in a huge family that cares for each other and I love being in it because when I have a problem in my life, whether it be from school or at home I can always talk to someone about it.
If you know there is something incomplete in your life then finding out about Jesus and following His way is the only thing you could possibly do. Anyone who calls on Jesus Christ to be cleansed from his or her sins and is baptized will be saved.
"“Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call” "(ACTS 2:38-39).
God does not lie and will continue to keep His Word forever - even if you don’t. Go and find out for yourselves, "“For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power” "(1 CORINTHIANS 4:20).
Love in Christ,
Johnny, Melbourne, Australia
My name is Johnny. I live in Melbourne, Australia and I am in year 10, which is my third last year of school. I would like to share with you all something that occurred to me a short while ago.
Most people these days regard Christians as snobbish or arrogant. The problem is that they don’t get the real picture, especially since a lot of so-called Christians these days only believe a few things from the Bible. For example, a lot of people nowadays say that miracles only happened during the Bible times and that these stopped a few hundred years ago. However, it is clearly stated in the Bible in MARK 16:18 "“They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.”"
This verse doesn’t say that miracles only happened in Jesus’ time. Miracles still happen today and there is proof of this right now. I myself have witnessed miracles and consider myself to have been very lucky to have grown up in this church where we have a Pastor who knows and cares for each and every one of us and constantly gives us the truth from God’s Word.
All the teenagers in this assembly are knitted together like brothers and sisters. We love spending time together doing things such as going to the surf and other fun related activities where we all join in; as well as being open with one another, telling each other our problems and learning about the Bible.
The members from the CAI are definitely not snobbish and my life in this assembly is the only one I would want to live. I feel like I’m in a huge family that cares for each other and I love being in it because when I have a problem in my life, whether it be from school or at home I can always talk to someone about it.
If you know there is something incomplete in your life then finding out about Jesus and following His way is the only thing you could possibly do. Anyone who calls on Jesus Christ to be cleansed from his or her sins and is baptized will be saved.
"“Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call” "(ACTS 2:38-39).
God does not lie and will continue to keep His Word forever - even if you don’t. Go and find out for yourselves, "“For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power” "(1 CORINTHIANS 4:20).
Love in Christ,
Johnny, Melbourne, Australia
I would like to tell you a testimony about guitars.
It all started at the AGM (Annual General Meeting) of our church which was held in Switzerland in 2004. While there I saw many of our folk playing guitars. I always wanted to play the guitar, so I asked one of the girls if she could teach me some chords. I tried to copy the chords that she played and as I did she said: "Wow, unbelievable. Have you ever played before?" I said: "No, never!" So she replied that I should really start to learn.
Back home I prayed that I'd be able to find a classical guitar that was not too expensive and an affordable teacher who would have flexible hours so that it would not disturb the time I needed for my schoolwork or my work for the LORD.
Everyone around me told me, “NEVER TO GIVE UP!" So I went on praying: "In Jesus'name, if you want me to play the guitar then let me find an affordable one, a cheap teacher and the talent, in Jesus’ name, amen!"
Then suddenly several things happened. Firstly I received a classical guitar from a good friend, Jan, who even changed the strings around for me from right to left handed. Another friend, Sonni, gave me a guitar-tripod and I found a teacher who is very, very cheap and flexible (the cherry on the cake is that he is also in a Pentecostal church!).
“Ask and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asked receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” MATTHEW 7:7-8
But the best is still to come though, my teacher told me that I'm learning quicker than any other student he has ever had. Where other students need two years he told me that I need just half a year. That was almost unbelievable. I know God has answered my prayer powerfully!
After learning the guitar for one month my teacher told me that I needed a better guitar. However, a good new guitar costs about 150€, which was far too much for me. So I prayed again and the Lord sent me another guitar as a gift. It was exactly what I wanted! I even received a guitar case with it.
This was so incredible. I had so many prayer answers in such a short time that it is more than obvious that NOTHING is impossible with God. If you trust in your prayer then God will answer you!! He has now also given me an electric bass guitar and THIS was my biggest wish. I always wanted to play bass. But first of all I will learn to play the classical guitar.
I hope you'll trust in your prayers. If you do HE will answer you.
Love in Christ,
Felix, Brunswick, Germany
It all started at the AGM (Annual General Meeting) of our church which was held in Switzerland in 2004. While there I saw many of our folk playing guitars. I always wanted to play the guitar, so I asked one of the girls if she could teach me some chords. I tried to copy the chords that she played and as I did she said: "Wow, unbelievable. Have you ever played before?" I said: "No, never!" So she replied that I should really start to learn.
Back home I prayed that I'd be able to find a classical guitar that was not too expensive and an affordable teacher who would have flexible hours so that it would not disturb the time I needed for my schoolwork or my work for the LORD.
Everyone around me told me, “NEVER TO GIVE UP!" So I went on praying: "In Jesus'name, if you want me to play the guitar then let me find an affordable one, a cheap teacher and the talent, in Jesus’ name, amen!"
Then suddenly several things happened. Firstly I received a classical guitar from a good friend, Jan, who even changed the strings around for me from right to left handed. Another friend, Sonni, gave me a guitar-tripod and I found a teacher who is very, very cheap and flexible (the cherry on the cake is that he is also in a Pentecostal church!).
“Ask and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asked receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” MATTHEW 7:7-8
But the best is still to come though, my teacher told me that I'm learning quicker than any other student he has ever had. Where other students need two years he told me that I need just half a year. That was almost unbelievable. I know God has answered my prayer powerfully!
After learning the guitar for one month my teacher told me that I needed a better guitar. However, a good new guitar costs about 150€, which was far too much for me. So I prayed again and the Lord sent me another guitar as a gift. It was exactly what I wanted! I even received a guitar case with it.
This was so incredible. I had so many prayer answers in such a short time that it is more than obvious that NOTHING is impossible with God. If you trust in your prayer then God will answer you!! He has now also given me an electric bass guitar and THIS was my biggest wish. I always wanted to play bass. But first of all I will learn to play the classical guitar.
I hope you'll trust in your prayers. If you do HE will answer you.
Love in Christ,
Felix, Brunswick, Germany
Hi everyone!
When my family and I moved to England, we were not able to take along my piano. From the day we arrived, I was praying that I could carry on playing my instruments and through the music could get to know people and make new friends in England. The Lord answered my prayers and I was able to take cello and piano lessons right from the beginning. However, I still did not own a piano to practice on. One Sunday I decided to pray that the Lord would give me a piano by the following Wednesday. Tuesday evening, I started to get a bit worried whether my prayer was going to be answered, but I decided to leave everything up to the Lord. That evening I found a notice at the music school saying that someone was looking for a new home for their piano, which they wanted to give away for free. When I read the man’s surname (Hope), I knew that that was the Lord’s answer to my prayer.
On Wednesday I called him up to ask if the piano was still available. I got the confirmation that I could have it exactly by the day I had asked the Lord to answer my prayer! Praise the Lord!
"MATTHEW 21:21-22"
"21 Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done."
"22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
Love in Christ ,Hannah - Vienna, Austria
When my family and I moved to England, we were not able to take along my piano. From the day we arrived, I was praying that I could carry on playing my instruments and through the music could get to know people and make new friends in England. The Lord answered my prayers and I was able to take cello and piano lessons right from the beginning. However, I still did not own a piano to practice on. One Sunday I decided to pray that the Lord would give me a piano by the following Wednesday. Tuesday evening, I started to get a bit worried whether my prayer was going to be answered, but I decided to leave everything up to the Lord. That evening I found a notice at the music school saying that someone was looking for a new home for their piano, which they wanted to give away for free. When I read the man’s surname (Hope), I knew that that was the Lord’s answer to my prayer.
On Wednesday I called him up to ask if the piano was still available. I got the confirmation that I could have it exactly by the day I had asked the Lord to answer my prayer! Praise the Lord!
"MATTHEW 21:21-22"
"21 Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done."
"22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
Love in Christ ,Hannah - Vienna, Austria
I’ve loved Jesus for a long time, but I wasn’t always following him. I was in my early 20’s when I became more serious about pursuing Jesus, but even then, I was doing life my way. I got out of a long-term relationship and found out I was pregnant a week later.
This was a blessing. I had no doubt or fear. I felt strong and empowered. In a moment of doubt, and uncertainty - I remember crying on my living room floor, praying to God. The enemy replied. He filled my mind with lies and fear. I had an abortion. I hated myself, and I knew my life had to change.
I asked God to take over. He destroyed any anxiety or fear that was in me. I dropped everything, booked a one-way ticket, packed 2 bags and left. That’s where my healing began.
I got connected to a local church, began serving, and got baptized. I lost myself and found Jesus, for real. It’s true when they say God renews, restores, and transforms. It doesn’t matter where you’re at.
I was wrecked, and my heart was broken. I hated myself, but the creator of the universe said my life is still worth it. He fought for me, He protected me, and He never left me. He never stopped loving me.
The people in my life will testify to that. My life isn’t about me anymore and it’s so much better that way. Because I know who He is, I know who I am, and I’m free.”
- Jenn
The people in my life will testify to that. My life isn’t about me anymore and it’s so much better that way. Because I know who He is, I know who I am, and I’m free.”
- Jenn
Some thoughts from leonija
1.What does it take to be brave?
A. In my opinion it takes three things (components) which are close to one another- courage, strength and prayer.
# Courage- Without courage you cannot be brave. The world will try to bring you down in different ways so you need courage to stay strong.
# Strength- In this world we need strength every day for different actions, for example, making a difficult choice or performing an action against what you want in that moment.
Last component for this- Prayer.
# Prayer is important for us to stand firm and get the strength and courage that we need for different situations. It is through prayer that we can fight ourselves and get through such things like anger and depression.
Of course, these three components are not required for everyone but I believe that more or less, we all need them.
2.How can we be brave in a fallen world?
2A. I believe it is only through God that we can be brave through all what we see around us (sickness, suicide, panic, wars etc.). I believe it is very difficult to be brave when seeing all this but I also know that God will help us to go through this and that He will uplift us in our own "wars".
3.How God can strengthen us for the battle(s) we are in?
3A. God can uplift our spirits as we pray and ask for His help. He cares for us and He wants to give us the strength we need to fight through our situation. It may be through more trials but it can also be through an uplifting song.
Leonija - Latvia
A. In my opinion it takes three things (components) which are close to one another- courage, strength and prayer.
# Courage- Without courage you cannot be brave. The world will try to bring you down in different ways so you need courage to stay strong.
# Strength- In this world we need strength every day for different actions, for example, making a difficult choice or performing an action against what you want in that moment.
Last component for this- Prayer.
# Prayer is important for us to stand firm and get the strength and courage that we need for different situations. It is through prayer that we can fight ourselves and get through such things like anger and depression.
Of course, these three components are not required for everyone but I believe that more or less, we all need them.
2.How can we be brave in a fallen world?
2A. I believe it is only through God that we can be brave through all what we see around us (sickness, suicide, panic, wars etc.). I believe it is very difficult to be brave when seeing all this but I also know that God will help us to go through this and that He will uplift us in our own "wars".
3.How God can strengthen us for the battle(s) we are in?
3A. God can uplift our spirits as we pray and ask for His help. He cares for us and He wants to give us the strength we need to fight through our situation. It may be through more trials but it can also be through an uplifting song.
Leonija - Latvia
I grew up going to church; I sang the songs, prayed before eating, and did my best to be a good kid. I remember having a conversation with my Mom about Jesus and accepting Him when I was a young teen.
As I got older, I became distant from God and didn’t think I needed him because my life was pretty decent. I told myself I would go deeper with my faith later on, I was still young with a lot of life to live.
In grade 10, my dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 brain and spine cancer. It crushed me. The doctors said he would only have four months to live. My family and loved ones prayed all the time for healing but I questioned my faith because I couldn’t understand why someone I loved was dealing with something so horrific.
Through it all, my dad didn’t let the cancer define who he was and I learned that it also doesn’t define who God is. He is always faithful.
My dad passed away in the hospital, living two months longer than he had been told. His passing made me realize there is no time to waste, there is no waiting for ‘later on’. God is right here, right now. He was waiting for me; Ready to love me, walk with me, and be my Heavenly Father.
A few years later, I attended an Easter Service. I had a moment with the Holy Spirit in the service and I knew I had to go all in with my faith and stop distancing myself from God. A year and half later I got baptized and today I am closer to God than ever before.” - Josh
As I got older, I became distant from God and didn’t think I needed him because my life was pretty decent. I told myself I would go deeper with my faith later on, I was still young with a lot of life to live.
In grade 10, my dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 brain and spine cancer. It crushed me. The doctors said he would only have four months to live. My family and loved ones prayed all the time for healing but I questioned my faith because I couldn’t understand why someone I loved was dealing with something so horrific.
Through it all, my dad didn’t let the cancer define who he was and I learned that it also doesn’t define who God is. He is always faithful.
My dad passed away in the hospital, living two months longer than he had been told. His passing made me realize there is no time to waste, there is no waiting for ‘later on’. God is right here, right now. He was waiting for me; Ready to love me, walk with me, and be my Heavenly Father.
A few years later, I attended an Easter Service. I had a moment with the Holy Spirit in the service and I knew I had to go all in with my faith and stop distancing myself from God. A year and half later I got baptized and today I am closer to God than ever before.” - Josh
Hi, my name is John and I’d like to share with you my experience of becoming a Christian.
When I was 17, I was kicked out of home due to being rebellious.
I thought this was great at the time, feeling finally free to do all the things I wanted to do.
My primary interests were parties, getting drunk, smoking weed and skateboarding.
Due to my chaotic life I stopped attending school a lot. I actually wanted to go, but the anxiety of facing everyone was overwhelming. Finally, I was told I couldn’t complete my final year due to low attendance.
Holding down a job or even completing training courses proved too difficult at this time.
Due to a range of offences, I was finally kicked out of the share house I was living in, and then another one.
The novelty of my newly found freedoms started to wear off and life became miserable, as I slowly realized a life of self-gratification leaves you very empty.
At 19, I moved into my own apartment and was determined to use this opportunity to turn over a fresh new leaf. I needed a steady job and more importantly, longed to find meaning in my life.
Feeling particularly down one day after a long period applying for jobs, I begged God from the heart for a stable job so my life could become more normal.
The same day I was called in for an interview for a Hospitality Traineeship. I got the job and it became a positive turning point (thank you God!). So that was the job for now, but I still needed some answers.
In a search for answers, I started reading many books, mostly about philosophy and spirituality. I also started meditating.
Once a week, I spoke to a youth counsellor who was also a spiritualist. She told me about her ‘guiding spirit’ that would lead her. She claimed it told her to buy a gold pentagram to wear around her neck which would protect her. All this was interesting to me, and I asked her to pray that her spirit would protect me.
She did this, encouraging me to keep calling on this ‘angel of light’ to protect me. As she called on this spirit, power came down over me and felt like it flowed through my body. It felt good, and I left feeling elated as though I was walking on a cloud.
I continued calling on this spirit whenever I felt in need of protection. Over a short period of time I lost any positive feeling from this experience. It seemed like being haunted, as if this was a deceptive spirit that had suckered me in.
2 CORINTHIANS 11:14 “And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light”.
Sometimes when crossing a busy road, I would have a strong suggestive impulse to throw myself in front of a truck. It was scary, because it seemed like the thought didn’t originate from me.
Alone in my room one night I felt an overwhelming compulsion to go down on my knees and pray to God. I started asking if He was Jesus or Mohammed or Krishna, etc. Suddenly it was if God gave me faith in that moment and I knew all the things I had heard about Jesus were true. I prayed from my heart that I could follow God, knowing I didn’t realize what sort of life that would be.
Shortly after this prayer I ran into a Christian in the street. We spoke a bit and then I wanted to leave (mostly I didn’t want to be seen speaking with a Christian preacher). As I was about to excuse myself, I heard a very clear, still voice that said “This is what you have been praying for”. It stopped me in my tracks.
We talked about the Bible and he showed me some scriptures. What surprised me was the spark of life I saw in him. He opened up his Bible to show me about the need to be baptized and born again. I could see that he truly believed what he was saying and this was very real to him. It left an impression on me.
In the following weeks I attended some meetings with born-again Christians, and found they could give many answers to my questions, using only the Bible and not their own philosophy.
I knew I had a window of opportunity to follow the God of the Bible and be saved. To cut a long story short I was soon baptized and received the gift of the Holy Ghost, with the sign of speaking in tongues (ACTS 2:4).
God has done many great things in my life, including giving me a sound mind as His Word promises, taking away fear, depression, anxiety and dependence on alcohol (2 TIMOTHY 1:7).
It took a while for me to realize what God had actually saved me from 1 SAMUEL 15:23 “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft” but I am grateful for the new life He has given me, and can freely give you too.
One of the most difficult things has been giving up my own selfishness, but hanging onto the promises in God’s living Word, everything is possible! (PHILIPPIANS 1:6).
In Christ’s love, John
When I was 17, I was kicked out of home due to being rebellious.
I thought this was great at the time, feeling finally free to do all the things I wanted to do.
My primary interests were parties, getting drunk, smoking weed and skateboarding.
Due to my chaotic life I stopped attending school a lot. I actually wanted to go, but the anxiety of facing everyone was overwhelming. Finally, I was told I couldn’t complete my final year due to low attendance.
Holding down a job or even completing training courses proved too difficult at this time.
Due to a range of offences, I was finally kicked out of the share house I was living in, and then another one.
The novelty of my newly found freedoms started to wear off and life became miserable, as I slowly realized a life of self-gratification leaves you very empty.
At 19, I moved into my own apartment and was determined to use this opportunity to turn over a fresh new leaf. I needed a steady job and more importantly, longed to find meaning in my life.
Feeling particularly down one day after a long period applying for jobs, I begged God from the heart for a stable job so my life could become more normal.
The same day I was called in for an interview for a Hospitality Traineeship. I got the job and it became a positive turning point (thank you God!). So that was the job for now, but I still needed some answers.
In a search for answers, I started reading many books, mostly about philosophy and spirituality. I also started meditating.
Once a week, I spoke to a youth counsellor who was also a spiritualist. She told me about her ‘guiding spirit’ that would lead her. She claimed it told her to buy a gold pentagram to wear around her neck which would protect her. All this was interesting to me, and I asked her to pray that her spirit would protect me.
She did this, encouraging me to keep calling on this ‘angel of light’ to protect me. As she called on this spirit, power came down over me and felt like it flowed through my body. It felt good, and I left feeling elated as though I was walking on a cloud.
I continued calling on this spirit whenever I felt in need of protection. Over a short period of time I lost any positive feeling from this experience. It seemed like being haunted, as if this was a deceptive spirit that had suckered me in.
2 CORINTHIANS 11:14 “And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light”.
Sometimes when crossing a busy road, I would have a strong suggestive impulse to throw myself in front of a truck. It was scary, because it seemed like the thought didn’t originate from me.
Alone in my room one night I felt an overwhelming compulsion to go down on my knees and pray to God. I started asking if He was Jesus or Mohammed or Krishna, etc. Suddenly it was if God gave me faith in that moment and I knew all the things I had heard about Jesus were true. I prayed from my heart that I could follow God, knowing I didn’t realize what sort of life that would be.
Shortly after this prayer I ran into a Christian in the street. We spoke a bit and then I wanted to leave (mostly I didn’t want to be seen speaking with a Christian preacher). As I was about to excuse myself, I heard a very clear, still voice that said “This is what you have been praying for”. It stopped me in my tracks.
We talked about the Bible and he showed me some scriptures. What surprised me was the spark of life I saw in him. He opened up his Bible to show me about the need to be baptized and born again. I could see that he truly believed what he was saying and this was very real to him. It left an impression on me.
In the following weeks I attended some meetings with born-again Christians, and found they could give many answers to my questions, using only the Bible and not their own philosophy.
I knew I had a window of opportunity to follow the God of the Bible and be saved. To cut a long story short I was soon baptized and received the gift of the Holy Ghost, with the sign of speaking in tongues (ACTS 2:4).
God has done many great things in my life, including giving me a sound mind as His Word promises, taking away fear, depression, anxiety and dependence on alcohol (2 TIMOTHY 1:7).
It took a while for me to realize what God had actually saved me from 1 SAMUEL 15:23 “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft” but I am grateful for the new life He has given me, and can freely give you too.
One of the most difficult things has been giving up my own selfishness, but hanging onto the promises in God’s living Word, everything is possible! (PHILIPPIANS 1:6).
In Christ’s love, John
My parents divorced when I was one so I never saw a healthy relationship growing up and I wasn’t raised with any spiritual beliefs. My teenage years were very dark and lonely, turning to self-harm and eventually, alcohol, partying and unhealthy relationships to try to fill the unexplainable void I felt inside. I never loved myself and I believed no one else could truly love me either.
A few years after high school, I reluctantly attended a Christian conference and I ended up giving my life to Christ. God’s love and forgiveness were so new to me and they were the most amazing things I had ever experienced. I began attending church and growing my walk with God. It quickly became my home and the people there, another family. I got baptized, began serving, and worked on cultivating healthy relationships.
Years later, I found myself struggling with some things from my past again. It was a Connect Group at Church that really helped me get to the root of my past pain, forgive and move forward. Since then, I’ve been blessed with so many opportunities to share what God’s done in my life with teenagers.
Over the years, I’ve faced and will continue to face, challenges and difficult circumstances but my church family has always supported me and God has carried me through it all, freeing me from more chains than I can count.
Today I know who I am in Christ and I can confidently say I love who I am, I love my life, I love my church and, most importantly, I love God.”
- Nikki
A few years after high school, I reluctantly attended a Christian conference and I ended up giving my life to Christ. God’s love and forgiveness were so new to me and they were the most amazing things I had ever experienced. I began attending church and growing my walk with God. It quickly became my home and the people there, another family. I got baptized, began serving, and worked on cultivating healthy relationships.
Years later, I found myself struggling with some things from my past again. It was a Connect Group at Church that really helped me get to the root of my past pain, forgive and move forward. Since then, I’ve been blessed with so many opportunities to share what God’s done in my life with teenagers.
Over the years, I’ve faced and will continue to face, challenges and difficult circumstances but my church family has always supported me and God has carried me through it all, freeing me from more chains than I can count.
Today I know who I am in Christ and I can confidently say I love who I am, I love my life, I love my church and, most importantly, I love God.”
- Nikki
Hi everyone, my name is Elizabeth and I’m 12 years old.
Well, it all started one day at my 'trampolining' club. I was doing some hard moves and I was nervous that I would hurt myself. So every time I went for a move I prayed and asked the Lord to protect me. Everything went well: I did not hurt myself and my coaches said that it was perfect and that I would just need little tiny improvements, like keeping my arms up at my ears.
When I had to come off, I sat at the side and a thought came into my head: ‘The LORD has done so many things for me, what did I do for him?’ The only thing that I did for him was pray at dinner (which never came from my heart) and sing in the meetings (most of the time I mouthed it). But the Lord died for ME.
When I got home I spoke to my mum and told her what happened. She was very happy and said that she was praying for me. Her prayer was answered. She asked me which would I choose: my friends or the LORD? I replied ‘the Lord’. She told me to pray to the LORD but before, say: ‘praise the LORD’ or ‘hallelujah’ and let GOD lead your tongue.
After a while I was speaking in a new tongue. I had received the Holy Spirit!
Later my mum came and she found me kneeling on the floor against my bed praying and crying to the LORD. She knelt beside me and asked me how I was and I replied ‘happy.’ Then she started praying with me.
The next Sunday I was baptized in uncle Henry’s bathtub. Now I am a happier me!
Elizabeth - Glasgow, Scotland
Well, it all started one day at my 'trampolining' club. I was doing some hard moves and I was nervous that I would hurt myself. So every time I went for a move I prayed and asked the Lord to protect me. Everything went well: I did not hurt myself and my coaches said that it was perfect and that I would just need little tiny improvements, like keeping my arms up at my ears.
When I had to come off, I sat at the side and a thought came into my head: ‘The LORD has done so many things for me, what did I do for him?’ The only thing that I did for him was pray at dinner (which never came from my heart) and sing in the meetings (most of the time I mouthed it). But the Lord died for ME.
When I got home I spoke to my mum and told her what happened. She was very happy and said that she was praying for me. Her prayer was answered. She asked me which would I choose: my friends or the LORD? I replied ‘the Lord’. She told me to pray to the LORD but before, say: ‘praise the LORD’ or ‘hallelujah’ and let GOD lead your tongue.
After a while I was speaking in a new tongue. I had received the Holy Spirit!
Later my mum came and she found me kneeling on the floor against my bed praying and crying to the LORD. She knelt beside me and asked me how I was and I replied ‘happy.’ Then she started praying with me.
The next Sunday I was baptized in uncle Henry’s bathtub. Now I am a happier me!
Elizabeth - Glasgow, Scotland
I was raised by a single mom. She was in and out of the hospital the majority of my childhood but luckily I had my extended family in my life to help out every time she had to go. On March 1, 2008 my mom passed away. At 11 years old I had to deal with something that no little girl should have to. I was now the girl without a mom.
I remember feeling so lost and confused. I didn’t understand what was going on or how this was possible.
Not long after my mom passed I was adopted by my aunt and uncle. They took my siblings and I in with open arms. The next year in grade 7 my friend invited me to Teen Church. Before attending, I didn’t have a relationship with God, I didn’t understand who he was. I started attending regularly and I really enjoyed the messages.
I remember hearing a message about how people have this void in their hearts that they try to fill it with other things when God is the only one who can fill it. His love and grace can fill that void. That resonated with me so much because I had a very obvious void in my heart since my mom had passed. That night I decided to accept Jesus Christ into my heart as my Lord and saviour. The following year I got water baptized.
I started serving and attending church and Rizn every week. Going through that rough time in my life has made me so grateful for God, my friends, and family. I know that no matter what I walk through in life God will always be my rock.” - Bella
I remember feeling so lost and confused. I didn’t understand what was going on or how this was possible.
Not long after my mom passed I was adopted by my aunt and uncle. They took my siblings and I in with open arms. The next year in grade 7 my friend invited me to Teen Church. Before attending, I didn’t have a relationship with God, I didn’t understand who he was. I started attending regularly and I really enjoyed the messages.
I remember hearing a message about how people have this void in their hearts that they try to fill it with other things when God is the only one who can fill it. His love and grace can fill that void. That resonated with me so much because I had a very obvious void in my heart since my mom had passed. That night I decided to accept Jesus Christ into my heart as my Lord and saviour. The following year I got water baptized.
I started serving and attending church and Rizn every week. Going through that rough time in my life has made me so grateful for God, my friends, and family. I know that no matter what I walk through in life God will always be my rock.” - Bella
Hello everybody!
I would like to share with you how I became a Christian when I was 9 years old.
Everything began one evening while I was watching TV. The movie was about Moses and there was a passage in the film which I did not understand at first. God was punishing Miriam (Moses' sister) by permitting a terrible sickness - leprosy - to come over her. It covered her whole body. She was terrible to look at. After a while, I understood that she was punished because she had spoken against God's chosen prophet Moses. By speaking against the prophet, she had also been speaking against God, not trusting Him anymore.
At that very moment, I was suddenly afraid of going to hell, I thought of all my sins.... I realized that God could deal with me just as severely, if I did not repent immediately. That night I really understood in my heart what I had heard so often before in Bible stories. I had known the truth in my head for a long time, namely that Jesus died for me, in my place, and had taken my sin upon Himself, in order to save me from God's wrath! That way, I would be completely cleansed, and God, looking at me, could not see any sin anymore, because Jesus had taken it all away.
I told an adult friend of mine that I wanted to receive the Holy Spirit as I had repented before God (see ACTS 2:38). We began to praise God in prayer and suddenly I started saying two or three words in a new language I had never learnt nor heard before. It was like it says in ACTS 2:4: ""And they were all filled with the Holy Ghost, and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance."" I experienced just that! It was thrilling!! The Lord had filled me with His Spirit.
It's been 5 years now since I was baptised (under water, as God's Word commands) and received the Holy Spirit, and the peace I received that day has never left me. Now I can help my classmates who are looking for answers to their problems, by telling them about Jesus Christ, my Saviour....
Praise God!!!
In the Love of the Lord,
Judith, Paris, France
My name is Daniel and I live in Szczecin, Poland.
I would like to tell you a testimony about my salvation. In August 2001, I went to England for our church assembly’s Main Meeting. I had been invited by my Aunt Evelyn and Uncle Jason.
In the beginning it was quite hard for me, because I did not understand much about Christianity. Nearly everything I heard was new for me. I had of course read the Bible, but I never realized that everything I was reading could be relevant for me and that God can be present in my life. After a few days at the Main Meeting I started to understand what the Bible really means: everlasting life, heaven and hell, and so on... so I made my decision for the Lord and the same day in the evening I was baptized under water (MARK 16:16). It was amazing, because I felt like the first Apostles and I realised that I had entered into God’s Kingdom. After prayer I received the Holy Spirit and I started speaking in other tongues. Praise The LORD for HIS great love and mercy.
I also want to write about one great testimony that happened after I became a Christian. I live in my grandparent’s house and since I became a Christian the situation in my family has drastically changed. My relationship with my grandfather was broken and difficult. He started to persecute me. He did not accept that I wanted to pray or spend time reading the Bible. One day when I was praying and reading, I realised that somehow I should prove to my grandfather that Jesus is alive within this assembly and this is not a kind of weird sect. I wanted him to know that we are a church with Bible-believing, God-fearing people. That day I decided to overcome my fear before men.
My grandfather had had problems with his legs and he could not walk - every step was difficult and painful for him. One day after a catholic mass he came home and was angry with me. To be honest I was prepared for this situation already. This was my chance… I stood my ground and said that he was a hypocrite and if he wanted to see God moving, he could let me pray for his disease.
I laid my hands on his legs and commanded the disease to leave. I could feel the Power of The Holy Spirit flowing through my hands. After the prayer I said to him, “Stand up and walk”. He could not believe he was healed!!!! Praise the Lord for this great miracle.
Now I have great hunger for the Lord and His teaching and I constantly pray that all my friends will be saved soon.
In Christ’s love, Daniel
I would like to tell you a testimony about my salvation. In August 2001, I went to England for our church assembly’s Main Meeting. I had been invited by my Aunt Evelyn and Uncle Jason.
In the beginning it was quite hard for me, because I did not understand much about Christianity. Nearly everything I heard was new for me. I had of course read the Bible, but I never realized that everything I was reading could be relevant for me and that God can be present in my life. After a few days at the Main Meeting I started to understand what the Bible really means: everlasting life, heaven and hell, and so on... so I made my decision for the Lord and the same day in the evening I was baptized under water (MARK 16:16). It was amazing, because I felt like the first Apostles and I realised that I had entered into God’s Kingdom. After prayer I received the Holy Spirit and I started speaking in other tongues. Praise The LORD for HIS great love and mercy.
I also want to write about one great testimony that happened after I became a Christian. I live in my grandparent’s house and since I became a Christian the situation in my family has drastically changed. My relationship with my grandfather was broken and difficult. He started to persecute me. He did not accept that I wanted to pray or spend time reading the Bible. One day when I was praying and reading, I realised that somehow I should prove to my grandfather that Jesus is alive within this assembly and this is not a kind of weird sect. I wanted him to know that we are a church with Bible-believing, God-fearing people. That day I decided to overcome my fear before men.
My grandfather had had problems with his legs and he could not walk - every step was difficult and painful for him. One day after a catholic mass he came home and was angry with me. To be honest I was prepared for this situation already. This was my chance… I stood my ground and said that he was a hypocrite and if he wanted to see God moving, he could let me pray for his disease.
I laid my hands on his legs and commanded the disease to leave. I could feel the Power of The Holy Spirit flowing through my hands. After the prayer I said to him, “Stand up and walk”. He could not believe he was healed!!!! Praise the Lord for this great miracle.
Now I have great hunger for the Lord and His teaching and I constantly pray that all my friends will be saved soon.
In Christ’s love, Daniel
Growing up, I believed in God but it didn’t go any deeper than that. My dad experienced several health challenges and when his condition became critical our family prayed day and night for a miracle. By His grace, our dad received a double transplant 15 years ago. This experience initiated my walk with Jesus.
When I was 17, my spiritual journey became stagnant because I was so concerned with how my relationship with God would affect my dating relationship. When that relationship ended after three years, I went through a year of depression; questioning my self-worth, identity, and future.
It was through that struggle that I found God’s grace, goodness and faithfulness in my life. I surrendered my life to Him and committed to attending a youth group where I met my husband. We’ve been together for 10 years, married for three and our story is a testimony of its own.
We’ve shared SO many amazing memories together, but it’s been our challenges that have shaped our marriage today. A year ago, we were on the brink of divorce and unsure if our marriage was going to survive. But by God’s grace, He’s given us the strength and perseverance to move forward with the support of family, friends, prayer, and Connect Groups at our church.
Now, we are SO extremely excited and blessed to be expecting our first baby in January 2019! There have been many instances in my life where I questioned my future, but thank God He holds our future in His hands and that He is faithful to His promises!” - Lindsay
When I was 17, my spiritual journey became stagnant because I was so concerned with how my relationship with God would affect my dating relationship. When that relationship ended after three years, I went through a year of depression; questioning my self-worth, identity, and future.
It was through that struggle that I found God’s grace, goodness and faithfulness in my life. I surrendered my life to Him and committed to attending a youth group where I met my husband. We’ve been together for 10 years, married for three and our story is a testimony of its own.
We’ve shared SO many amazing memories together, but it’s been our challenges that have shaped our marriage today. A year ago, we were on the brink of divorce and unsure if our marriage was going to survive. But by God’s grace, He’s given us the strength and perseverance to move forward with the support of family, friends, prayer, and Connect Groups at our church.
Now, we are SO extremely excited and blessed to be expecting our first baby in January 2019! There have been many instances in my life where I questioned my future, but thank God He holds our future in His hands and that He is faithful to His promises!” - Lindsay
Hi everybody,
I would like to share the testimony of how God gave me the gift of a keyboard and piano lessons.
For a long time I had the dream of playing the piano and owning one, though sadly keyboards are very expensive and pianos were out of question. I already played the violin and the recorder, but there was nothing that I wanted more than to learn how to play the piano. I always prayed and believed that my prayers would be answered and I knew that nothing was impossible for God.
MARK 10:27 And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible.
Then, one day, it was getting close to my mum’s birthday and her friend, Ewa, asked her what she would like (my mum had also been praying for a piano). Ewa said that she had a gift ready, but wanted to know what the best thing was that she could give her. Since my mum had been praying for a long time she said that a keyboard would be wonderful. And… PTL! Ewa – for a reason that she didn’t know – had brought out a keyboard that her family hadn’t used for over a year and gave it to us for free! It was in perfect condition and only the cable had to be made longer. It really was a prayer answer! Though, at that time I taught myself for I had no teacher. That is, until a friend from our church, offered to give me lessons after her sister, Laura, had heard me playing! I had these lessons for about 6 months until Hannah decided that she was going to move to Austria, her home country. Hearing this I was very upset but I prayed that God would provide another teacher when Hannah left.
Behind our house there is a first-class music school. Finding this, my mum prayed and put my name down for piano lessons. I was overjoyed at the thought even though the waiting list was quite long and I was at the bottom. After about two weeks suddenly the school phoned us and asked me if I wanted piano lessons every Tuesday! They explained that they had rung the 30 – 40 people in front of me on the list but no one answered or got in contact with the school! This was surely the Lord’s doing!
MATTHEW 7:7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
I still have these lessons every Wednesday and have taken two grades. My teacher is wonderful and I love learning to play the piano for God’s glory… I play in almost every meeting and thoroughly enjoy it.
Praise The Lord!!!
In His Love,
Miriam
Hello everybody,
Greetings from Wellington, New Zealand. As a Christian teenager, I would like to tell you what has been happening in my life so far. I am very grateful to have been brought up in this church according to the laws of the Bible. There are few good role models out there to which we can turn for guidance and I find that many teenagers are uncertain about their future. I worry about some of my friends and other young people who are teenagers nowadays because they don’t really have many examples to look up to anymore. Most parents also don’t set a good example and many teenagers don’t grow up with good morals.
For me, as a Christian, Jesus Christ is the perfect role model. I feel secure knowing that I can be like Jesus and do well in life. Although many won’t admit it, going out to parties, taking drugs, drinking, etc. is just a way to fill up the emptiness in their life. There is something missing in your life if you don’t have God! Although you can’t avoid making mistakes, following the example of Jesus is the only solution to problems.
Learning from the Bible and from those (our elders) who train me within this Christian Assembly gives me the right motives for an uncertain future. I am learning about all sorts of issues; for example, how to manage my time and not to waste it, how to bring up children properly in the future, and other things.
Although rebellion seems like fun, I realize that there is nothing ‘out there’ to desire. Many don’t think logically anymore. You just have to ask yourself, “What will happen to me when I die?" Nobody really cares to think about this anymore, and most people believe there is nothing after death. But if that’s the case, what is the point of life? There is certainly going to be a Judgment Day after death, and to make it to Heaven you have to follow God!
As a Christian teenager I can say that IF you obey God there are no unnecessary burdens or worries. I’m constantly learning something new that will help me to be trained for a proper future in the Lord.
There is a lot to learn and there is a lot happening as we grow up into adults. Unlike many in the world I can be certain that, with obedience to the Lord, I can grow up following the example of Jesus and those who have gone before me. My purpose in life is to follow God and make it into Heaven.
“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.” Ecclesiastes 12:13
"Why don’t you decide to follow God’s plan for your life? What have you really got to lose?"
Love in Christ,
Clemens
Greetings from Wellington, New Zealand. As a Christian teenager, I would like to tell you what has been happening in my life so far. I am very grateful to have been brought up in this church according to the laws of the Bible. There are few good role models out there to which we can turn for guidance and I find that many teenagers are uncertain about their future. I worry about some of my friends and other young people who are teenagers nowadays because they don’t really have many examples to look up to anymore. Most parents also don’t set a good example and many teenagers don’t grow up with good morals.
For me, as a Christian, Jesus Christ is the perfect role model. I feel secure knowing that I can be like Jesus and do well in life. Although many won’t admit it, going out to parties, taking drugs, drinking, etc. is just a way to fill up the emptiness in their life. There is something missing in your life if you don’t have God! Although you can’t avoid making mistakes, following the example of Jesus is the only solution to problems.
Learning from the Bible and from those (our elders) who train me within this Christian Assembly gives me the right motives for an uncertain future. I am learning about all sorts of issues; for example, how to manage my time and not to waste it, how to bring up children properly in the future, and other things.
Although rebellion seems like fun, I realize that there is nothing ‘out there’ to desire. Many don’t think logically anymore. You just have to ask yourself, “What will happen to me when I die?" Nobody really cares to think about this anymore, and most people believe there is nothing after death. But if that’s the case, what is the point of life? There is certainly going to be a Judgment Day after death, and to make it to Heaven you have to follow God!
As a Christian teenager I can say that IF you obey God there are no unnecessary burdens or worries. I’m constantly learning something new that will help me to be trained for a proper future in the Lord.
There is a lot to learn and there is a lot happening as we grow up into adults. Unlike many in the world I can be certain that, with obedience to the Lord, I can grow up following the example of Jesus and those who have gone before me. My purpose in life is to follow God and make it into Heaven.
“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.” Ecclesiastes 12:13
"Why don’t you decide to follow God’s plan for your life? What have you really got to lose?"
Love in Christ,
Clemens
Hi! My name is Karin and I would like to tell you how I became a Christian and got saved.
As my parents are Christians in this assembly, I had been brought up believing the Bible and knowing it was the Truth. However, I saw my peers living a very different life than I did. For example, most of them were allowed to watch unlimited TV, have parties and in general have a “fun” life. I would often be attracted by their way of life.
But I could also see the downside of it. Many of my friends started to get involved in alcohol and drugs as well as sex. I realized how selfish this lifestyle was and that it would lead me away from God.
One summer, a few years ago the whole church got together for a gathering in England. I came expecting to be saved, but not really knowing what to do. I knew that even though I went to church and read my Bible, it wasn’t enough. I wanted to please God and make it to heaven. I wanted to live a life with God, not without Him. I knew that I had to receive the Holy Spirit because He helps us to overcome any problems and shows us the Truth.
One morning during a prayer meeting I was asked if I wanted to receive the Holy Spirit and I immediately said yes. I received prayer that my heart would be open and that I would be ready for this big step. Later that day, I prayed with somebody and after I had truly repented, and sought for this gift, God gave me the Holy Spirit with the sign of speaking in a new language according to ACTS 2:38. I was so happy because I knew it was the right way. That evening I was baptized in the Atlantic Ocean and my old self was washed away and I started a new life.
I know that many people out there look for happiness in relationships and drugs. For me, I find happiness with Christ, and when I am together with others who feel the same way. It isn’t always easy, as in the world there are many attractions, but sometimes I really have to fight through because in the end, it’ll all be worth it in heaven. Being able to pray in tongues is a personal relationship between God and me and has brought me closer to Him. I know that ever since I got saved, the Bible has become more than a book; it’s something to judge myself with and learn from. Praying always gives me a better attitude towards everything and that is because Christ lives in me. It is always exciting to live as a Christian!
Karin
Toronto, Canada
As my parents are Christians in this assembly, I had been brought up believing the Bible and knowing it was the Truth. However, I saw my peers living a very different life than I did. For example, most of them were allowed to watch unlimited TV, have parties and in general have a “fun” life. I would often be attracted by their way of life.
But I could also see the downside of it. Many of my friends started to get involved in alcohol and drugs as well as sex. I realized how selfish this lifestyle was and that it would lead me away from God.
One summer, a few years ago the whole church got together for a gathering in England. I came expecting to be saved, but not really knowing what to do. I knew that even though I went to church and read my Bible, it wasn’t enough. I wanted to please God and make it to heaven. I wanted to live a life with God, not without Him. I knew that I had to receive the Holy Spirit because He helps us to overcome any problems and shows us the Truth.
One morning during a prayer meeting I was asked if I wanted to receive the Holy Spirit and I immediately said yes. I received prayer that my heart would be open and that I would be ready for this big step. Later that day, I prayed with somebody and after I had truly repented, and sought for this gift, God gave me the Holy Spirit with the sign of speaking in a new language according to ACTS 2:38. I was so happy because I knew it was the right way. That evening I was baptized in the Atlantic Ocean and my old self was washed away and I started a new life.
I know that many people out there look for happiness in relationships and drugs. For me, I find happiness with Christ, and when I am together with others who feel the same way. It isn’t always easy, as in the world there are many attractions, but sometimes I really have to fight through because in the end, it’ll all be worth it in heaven. Being able to pray in tongues is a personal relationship between God and me and has brought me closer to Him. I know that ever since I got saved, the Bible has become more than a book; it’s something to judge myself with and learn from. Praying always gives me a better attitude towards everything and that is because Christ lives in me. It is always exciting to live as a Christian!
Karin
Toronto, Canada
Hi, I’m Julia from Perth,
I would like to tell you a little something about what happened during one weekend.
On Saturday evening, I spent some time reading a book called “There is a miracle is in your mouth” by John Osteen. It gives you a lot of examples of how you can receive healing from God by speaking aloud. I realized that, as I was reading the book and with all the different examples, faith and the expectation to see such a miracle was growing inside me. It spoke about how women were healed of cancer by praying and ‘speaking out’ the miracle. In addition, there was a baby who was born with a muscle disability and was completely healed, again by the family praying and ‘speaking out’ the miracle.
Well anyway, that night, I got really bad pain in my legs. I could not curl up because that was too painful and keeping my legs straight was no better. After reading that book, even though I had only gotten half way through, I realized that it would not get any better if I did not put the things into practice, which I had just learned, as the Bible says be ye doers. Also, because the book had so many amazing examples, it also gave me faith that God would heal me. When I went to bed, I laid there, put my hands on my legs, and kept saying, “By his stripes I am healed” (ISAIAH 53:5) Five minutes later I was perfectly healed with no pain whatsoever and I could sleep well too, which was also much needed. PTL!
Love in Christ, Julia, Perth, Scotland
Hebrews 11:1-3
1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
2 For by it the elders obtained a good report.
3 Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
I would like to tell you a little something about what happened during one weekend.
On Saturday evening, I spent some time reading a book called “There is a miracle is in your mouth” by John Osteen. It gives you a lot of examples of how you can receive healing from God by speaking aloud. I realized that, as I was reading the book and with all the different examples, faith and the expectation to see such a miracle was growing inside me. It spoke about how women were healed of cancer by praying and ‘speaking out’ the miracle. In addition, there was a baby who was born with a muscle disability and was completely healed, again by the family praying and ‘speaking out’ the miracle.
Well anyway, that night, I got really bad pain in my legs. I could not curl up because that was too painful and keeping my legs straight was no better. After reading that book, even though I had only gotten half way through, I realized that it would not get any better if I did not put the things into practice, which I had just learned, as the Bible says be ye doers. Also, because the book had so many amazing examples, it also gave me faith that God would heal me. When I went to bed, I laid there, put my hands on my legs, and kept saying, “By his stripes I am healed” (ISAIAH 53:5) Five minutes later I was perfectly healed with no pain whatsoever and I could sleep well too, which was also much needed. PTL!
Love in Christ, Julia, Perth, Scotland
Hebrews 11:1-3
1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
2 For by it the elders obtained a good report.
3 Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
Hi Teens around the world!! :-)
I would like to share a little testimony with you. In France you have to do a three-day internship in the 4th year of high school. My mum and I were sending out letters and e-mails to find a place preferably in an international trading company. I asked God if I could work in the company in my village because it would be so practical and in walking distance, even though they were very busy around Christmas time. Sadly, it didn't work out and I was panicking because I realized that I had started my search too late and that it was now only one week before the internship should start. But I continued praying. Then my mum had the idea to ask at the reception of some well-known hotels if they would need an intern. Already at the second hotel called "IBIS" they accepted me - I was so relieved and happy! Here are two scriptures I found about that situation: "WHATSOEVER YE SHALL ASK OF THE FATHER IN MY NAME, HE MAY GIVE IT YOU." JOHN 15:16B and "FELL ON HIS FACE, AND PRAYED, SAYING, O MY FATHER, IF IT BE POSSIBLE, LET THIS CUP PASS FROM ME: NEVERTHELESS, NOT AS II WILL, BUT AS THOU WILT." MATTHEW 26:39 I thought that I would work in the company in my village, but God had another plan for me, a much better plan. It doesn't happen how you think, but how God plans it for you. :-) Praise the Lord!!! God answers our prayers!! :-)
Love in Christ, Josephine
I would like to share a little testimony with you. In France you have to do a three-day internship in the 4th year of high school. My mum and I were sending out letters and e-mails to find a place preferably in an international trading company. I asked God if I could work in the company in my village because it would be so practical and in walking distance, even though they were very busy around Christmas time. Sadly, it didn't work out and I was panicking because I realized that I had started my search too late and that it was now only one week before the internship should start. But I continued praying. Then my mum had the idea to ask at the reception of some well-known hotels if they would need an intern. Already at the second hotel called "IBIS" they accepted me - I was so relieved and happy! Here are two scriptures I found about that situation: "WHATSOEVER YE SHALL ASK OF THE FATHER IN MY NAME, HE MAY GIVE IT YOU." JOHN 15:16B and "FELL ON HIS FACE, AND PRAYED, SAYING, O MY FATHER, IF IT BE POSSIBLE, LET THIS CUP PASS FROM ME: NEVERTHELESS, NOT AS II WILL, BUT AS THOU WILT." MATTHEW 26:39 I thought that I would work in the company in my village, but God had another plan for me, a much better plan. It doesn't happen how you think, but how God plans it for you. :-) Praise the Lord!!! God answers our prayers!! :-)
Love in Christ, Josephine
Hi to all!
Greetings from Canada.
Recently, we watched a video about a girl who was shot at Columbine High School. At the beginning of the video, her father explained that she had been especially committing herself to the Lord one year or so before the shootings. From her journal that she wrote, you could see that she was just like any other teenager; she had her ups and downs. However, what made her different was what she made of them. She wanted to see change at her high school and see people saved. She had a real vision for this. She wanted to be a testimony to others both through word and action. She was determined to change herself wholeheartedly. The journal said that she even lost some of her friends because of her witnessing. Two of the people who she witnessed to were the boys who did the shootings.
The thing that really hit me was on the day of the shooting, after she was shot at already, they asked her if she still believed in God. She replied “yes” and then was shot.
The video also showed her funeral. It showed people talking about her and the life which she had. How she always went a little further and always tried to make herself the very best she could. This video was saddening, yet also inspiring. It made me judge myself and really check if I was like this girl. What am I doing to get others saved? Would I give up my life like that?
“LET NO MAN DESPISE THY YOUTH; BUT BE THOU AN EXAMPLE OF THE BELIEVERS, IN WORD, IN CONVERSATION, IN CHARITY, IN SPIRIT, IN FAITH, IN PURITY” (1 TIMOTHY 4:12).
Greetings from Canada.
Recently, we watched a video about a girl who was shot at Columbine High School. At the beginning of the video, her father explained that she had been especially committing herself to the Lord one year or so before the shootings. From her journal that she wrote, you could see that she was just like any other teenager; she had her ups and downs. However, what made her different was what she made of them. She wanted to see change at her high school and see people saved. She had a real vision for this. She wanted to be a testimony to others both through word and action. She was determined to change herself wholeheartedly. The journal said that she even lost some of her friends because of her witnessing. Two of the people who she witnessed to were the boys who did the shootings.
The thing that really hit me was on the day of the shooting, after she was shot at already, they asked her if she still believed in God. She replied “yes” and then was shot.
The video also showed her funeral. It showed people talking about her and the life which she had. How she always went a little further and always tried to make herself the very best she could. This video was saddening, yet also inspiring. It made me judge myself and really check if I was like this girl. What am I doing to get others saved? Would I give up my life like that?
“LET NO MAN DESPISE THY YOUTH; BUT BE THOU AN EXAMPLE OF THE BELIEVERS, IN WORD, IN CONVERSATION, IN CHARITY, IN SPIRIT, IN FAITH, IN PURITY” (1 TIMOTHY 4:12).
My parents were separated before I was born. Growing up, I often questioned why I felt so different than all my friends who had both parents. I struggled with validation and where I belonged because I always felt kind of left out and like I wasn’t good enough. In junior high I was bullied which added to those feelings. In grade 9, I got invited to a church youth event. I continued going to youth after that because of new friendships I made but it wasn’t until Youth Camp 2013 that my life really changed. I remember being in a night service and feeling God’s overwhelming love like a hug around me. As I worshipped Him, I was reminded of what a good father He is to me, and how He is better than any earthly father.
After camp, my mom and I started attending church regularly. Because of that we’ve made a stronger connection in our relationship and I’ve gained so many life-giving and lifelong friendships. I couldn’t have imagined feeling like I do now, let alone being a part of something so great. My church isn’t just a place, it’s home.
God has truly changed my life and is continually speaking to my heart, reminding me of how good He is. He has blessed me with relationships and opportunities through His faithfulness. Looking back, I can see that he has always been there for me through every struggle and that there is always a bigger purpose. I know that I am never alone and I can’t wait for what he has planned next.” - Catie
After camp, my mom and I started attending church regularly. Because of that we’ve made a stronger connection in our relationship and I’ve gained so many life-giving and lifelong friendships. I couldn’t have imagined feeling like I do now, let alone being a part of something so great. My church isn’t just a place, it’s home.
God has truly changed my life and is continually speaking to my heart, reminding me of how good He is. He has blessed me with relationships and opportunities through His faithfulness. Looking back, I can see that he has always been there for me through every struggle and that there is always a bigger purpose. I know that I am never alone and I can’t wait for what he has planned next.” - Catie
My name is Toby and I have something great to tell you!
One night after we had a Christian meeting, I doubted that kids or younger people could perform miracles, because of their age. My Dad told me, that it doesn’t matter what age you are you can still perform miracles. I still doubted that I could perform a miracle. My Dad then asked me to sit down and straighten my legs, because recently my leg had been hurting during football matches and in athletic races. My dad asked me to sit on a chair and straighten my back and my legs and we compared the length of my legs and one was slightly shorter than the other, so my Dad asked Lukas; my older brother (15 years old) to pray for my leg. As Lukas prayed, I felt a power going through my leg as it grew out; so both legs were the same length. I was overwhelmed and grateful and from that day on I knew, that it doesn’t matter what age you are or what situation you are in, God will always listen to you and help you, if you ask. After this my leg did not hurt during football (soccer) matches and it was easier to run during races, which helped me qualify for the athletics A-team.
One night after we had a Christian meeting, I doubted that kids or younger people could perform miracles, because of their age. My Dad told me, that it doesn’t matter what age you are you can still perform miracles. I still doubted that I could perform a miracle. My Dad then asked me to sit down and straighten my legs, because recently my leg had been hurting during football matches and in athletic races. My dad asked me to sit on a chair and straighten my back and my legs and we compared the length of my legs and one was slightly shorter than the other, so my Dad asked Lukas; my older brother (15 years old) to pray for my leg. As Lukas prayed, I felt a power going through my leg as it grew out; so both legs were the same length. I was overwhelmed and grateful and from that day on I knew, that it doesn’t matter what age you are or what situation you are in, God will always listen to you and help you, if you ask. After this my leg did not hurt during football (soccer) matches and it was easier to run during races, which helped me qualify for the athletics A-team.
Hi Everyone,
Many greetings from Down Under. As you would all know by now, being a teenager these days is not as easy as it looks. Many temptations are thrown our way, mainly in the form of alcohol, drugs and sex.
While still at school, I sometimes went to parties that my friends were having. I felt somewhat out of place because I don’t drink alcohol and I was often questioned and mocked because of it. I felt extremely sad seeing my friends drink 'away' their problems, and naturally when they sobered up, their problems just got bigger and they drank more and more in a vicious cycle that's very hard to break. I often found it hard to say ‘no’ to my friends and at one point even gave in to these temptations. Drinking alcohol really didn’t do anything for me apart from giving me a headache and making me hide from my parents. There is a very good reason the Bible says we shouldn’t drink, we deceive ourselves more than we cure any problems. In hindsight I can truly say that it’s all just a big load of peer pressure. Sure, we need to find these things out for ourselves but we need to know our limits as well. My parents didn’t get angry with me for drinking but they taught me a valuable lesson through it. It’s really not worthwhile at all.
I don't smoke, drink or take drugs nor will I have sex before marriage because I believe and follow the Bible that states in PROVERBS 20:1, “Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.”
and in PROVERBS 31:10-11, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.”
There are many more scriptures that I could quote. I’m very happy with my life and the Lord has provided me with so much. I have opportunities now that I would never have dreamed were possible and I know it’s because the Lord is opening the doors for me. If I purposely continued to rebel I know that I would not be where I am today. I have found that the Word of God is not set up to restrict you from having fun but rather to protect you. That’s why I base my life on the Bible and go without the drinking and smoking etc. As well as being written about in the Word of God, drugs and alcohol are not healthy, but far from it. Praise the Lord for His truth, He shows us how we can live without such evils… and still be “cool”.
God bless
Steph
Many greetings from Down Under. As you would all know by now, being a teenager these days is not as easy as it looks. Many temptations are thrown our way, mainly in the form of alcohol, drugs and sex.
While still at school, I sometimes went to parties that my friends were having. I felt somewhat out of place because I don’t drink alcohol and I was often questioned and mocked because of it. I felt extremely sad seeing my friends drink 'away' their problems, and naturally when they sobered up, their problems just got bigger and they drank more and more in a vicious cycle that's very hard to break. I often found it hard to say ‘no’ to my friends and at one point even gave in to these temptations. Drinking alcohol really didn’t do anything for me apart from giving me a headache and making me hide from my parents. There is a very good reason the Bible says we shouldn’t drink, we deceive ourselves more than we cure any problems. In hindsight I can truly say that it’s all just a big load of peer pressure. Sure, we need to find these things out for ourselves but we need to know our limits as well. My parents didn’t get angry with me for drinking but they taught me a valuable lesson through it. It’s really not worthwhile at all.
I don't smoke, drink or take drugs nor will I have sex before marriage because I believe and follow the Bible that states in PROVERBS 20:1, “Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.”
and in PROVERBS 31:10-11, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.”
There are many more scriptures that I could quote. I’m very happy with my life and the Lord has provided me with so much. I have opportunities now that I would never have dreamed were possible and I know it’s because the Lord is opening the doors for me. If I purposely continued to rebel I know that I would not be where I am today. I have found that the Word of God is not set up to restrict you from having fun but rather to protect you. That’s why I base my life on the Bible and go without the drinking and smoking etc. As well as being written about in the Word of God, drugs and alcohol are not healthy, but far from it. Praise the Lord for His truth, He shows us how we can live without such evils… and still be “cool”.
God bless
Steph
Hi everybody!
I would like to share my testimony of how I was controlled by fear!
For a long time, I was scared of everything, literally. I was terrified that my family would die and that I would be left alone, or that I would die, or even that God would forget all about me and that I would go to Hell. I was so scared that I often cried myself to sleep at night, but sometimes was even scared to fall asleep. Every day Satan gave me new fears and I started believing them, but I couldn’t stop the fear. I prayed every day, every minute, trying to block out the new fears that played in my mind. I felt that if I didn’t pray all day, the people I loved would die and that God would ‘blame’ me on Judgement Day.
I would get exhausted from fearing everything around me all day, and gradually this fear started building up to become anger, which I took out on my family. I hated myself and became convinced all my fears would come true. I started believing that God was giving me these fears and wondered why I believed in a God who hated me enough to give me these fears. I became desperate for a way to escape this never-ending fear, but as my constant prayers ‘weren’t working’, I was rapidly giving up hope. I felt as if I was dying inside.
One evening it was particularly bad. I had had a full day and was exhausted from trying to block out the nagging fear within me. I got ready to go to bed and suddenly something inside me just snapped. An overwhelming wave of fear came over me, and I couldn’t stop crying. Every time I closed my eyes I would see demons and other figures coming to get me. I even saw a figure resembling my dad, who walked towards me, arms outstretched to strangle me. At this point I couldn’t take it anymore. I screamed until I found it difficult to breathe; I didn’t understand what to do anymore. I got up and went to talk to my dad, but I couldn’t speak and my breathing got heavier and heavier. It got so bad that my dad got really worried, and even asked if I had been taking something because he had never seen me like this. I asked him to pray that God would take away my fear, so my dad commanded the fear to leave me. Straight after the prayer I felt something leave me, and I was able to breathe normally again. I felt so relieved and calm for the first time in months that I couldn’t believe it! All my fear had disappeared and my dad showed me some scriptures about what the Bible says about fear.
2 TIMOTHY 1:7 “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. “
1 JOHN 4:18 “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear hath torment...”
I realized that being a spirit filled Christian is never going to be easy, but that it’s such a beautiful thing that Satan will do all in his power to destroy our relationship with God. It is an ongoing battle, but it is a battle we need to fight and that is well worth fighting for.
Praise the Lord!
Jeanna
I would like to share my testimony of how I was controlled by fear!
For a long time, I was scared of everything, literally. I was terrified that my family would die and that I would be left alone, or that I would die, or even that God would forget all about me and that I would go to Hell. I was so scared that I often cried myself to sleep at night, but sometimes was even scared to fall asleep. Every day Satan gave me new fears and I started believing them, but I couldn’t stop the fear. I prayed every day, every minute, trying to block out the new fears that played in my mind. I felt that if I didn’t pray all day, the people I loved would die and that God would ‘blame’ me on Judgement Day.
I would get exhausted from fearing everything around me all day, and gradually this fear started building up to become anger, which I took out on my family. I hated myself and became convinced all my fears would come true. I started believing that God was giving me these fears and wondered why I believed in a God who hated me enough to give me these fears. I became desperate for a way to escape this never-ending fear, but as my constant prayers ‘weren’t working’, I was rapidly giving up hope. I felt as if I was dying inside.
One evening it was particularly bad. I had had a full day and was exhausted from trying to block out the nagging fear within me. I got ready to go to bed and suddenly something inside me just snapped. An overwhelming wave of fear came over me, and I couldn’t stop crying. Every time I closed my eyes I would see demons and other figures coming to get me. I even saw a figure resembling my dad, who walked towards me, arms outstretched to strangle me. At this point I couldn’t take it anymore. I screamed until I found it difficult to breathe; I didn’t understand what to do anymore. I got up and went to talk to my dad, but I couldn’t speak and my breathing got heavier and heavier. It got so bad that my dad got really worried, and even asked if I had been taking something because he had never seen me like this. I asked him to pray that God would take away my fear, so my dad commanded the fear to leave me. Straight after the prayer I felt something leave me, and I was able to breathe normally again. I felt so relieved and calm for the first time in months that I couldn’t believe it! All my fear had disappeared and my dad showed me some scriptures about what the Bible says about fear.
2 TIMOTHY 1:7 “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. “
1 JOHN 4:18 “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear hath torment...”
I realized that being a spirit filled Christian is never going to be easy, but that it’s such a beautiful thing that Satan will do all in his power to destroy our relationship with God. It is an ongoing battle, but it is a battle we need to fight and that is well worth fighting for.
Praise the Lord!
Jeanna
Hello my name is Virginia and I’m from Australia.
I´d like to share with you how I got saved, I am 13 and I’ve grown-up in a Christian family and realized quite early on that I have a soul that needs to get saved one day. To receive the Grace of GOD you need to repent. You have to become aware that repentance is your key to heaven according to the word of GOD. "MARK 6:12"
Repentance means actually examining your life and realizing that you are not living GOD's plan for you and that you are living without GOD's righteousness and this you have to change now. It is your most personal decision, with the word of GOD you can find out if you live by God´s standards or not. If you then truly ask GOD to forgive you your sins (every part in your life which goes against the LORD), see "EXODUS 20:3-17". I knew that I was a sinner, although I might not have broken that many commandments I was convicted that I´m no better than anyone else my age, even if I have grown-up in a Christian family.
When some friends within our church received the Holy Spirit and their prayer language ("LUKE 11:13, ACTS 2:4") I became sad and thought maybe I do not really know what salvation means, so crying I asked my mum about it. I could not understand why GOD did not listen to me when I was seeking Him for quite some time. My mum said that it was not good to have these worries as GOD has His timing and HE knows exactly when the time was right for me. I just have to focus on the LORD and trust HIM alone. "MATTHEW 7:7"
A few days later I got a deep burden within my heart. A burden about the sins I have committed and wanted to be free of that burden and receive forgiveness. At our next Christian meeting we had a time of prayer when I quietly asked the Lord to forgive me and I told GOD everything and confessed a lot. I also prayed about other things I had on my heart. After that meeting my dad and a deacon took me to a separate room and after my dad showed me in the Bible about salvation through Jesus Christ, we prayed for a short while. During that prayer time I felt completely warm inside my body and I could feel the power of God. I was so happy I knew that God had forgiven me, "ROMANS 15:3" and I knew that I had received the Holy Spirit when I started to pray in a new language which I did not know. It was just so cool! Later I was baptized in a lake by full immersion and since then I´m free and born again. "ACTS 2:41" I now pray that you too will receive GOD´s grace and that you can get to know HIS ways
Hi Everyone,
I wanted to share a small something on the Biblical characteristics of a friend. I think the No.1 best thing to do for getting friends is to be a friend yourself. It’s that simple! Not only is that a good way to make friends, but it is a vital part of keeping a friendship going. Here are a few of the Biblical characteristics of a friend:
1. There are only a few close friends (PROVERBS 18:24). Jesus himself
had his 12, his 3 and his 1.
2. A friend gives himself (JOHN 15:13). This means that they have a readiness to serve the other.
3. A friend knows you deeply (JAMES 5:16). They are people who we can be ourselves with.
4. A friend loves unconditionally (PROVERBS 17:17).
5. A friend gives good advice (PROVERBS 27:9).
6. A friend speaks the truth in love (PROVERBS 27:6).
7. A friend encourages you (JOB 6:14).
8. A friend does not fear a clash with you (PROVERBS 27:17). Clashes cannot be avoided but they can be solved.
9. A friend is delicate (PROVERBS 26:18-19). They are aware of your sensitive spots.
10. A friend is loyal and stays by your side (PROVERBS 16:28B).
Source: Pulpit Speech II, Preacher Silcox, gochristianhelps.com
I am really very fortunate for being in a church where I am blessed with very special friends that care for me and, are also great fun. I also, however, have friends outside of the church, in school for example, and have recently come to realise just how important it is to have good friends.
When I started high school nearly five years ago, like most kids I made a couple of friends. We chatted and did the things that teenagers normally do. One ‘friend’ however, gave me a very hard time, I tried to be kind to her, but she continued to be very nasty and as a result of this I was not a very happy kid in fact I was so, so miserable and I eventually broke away from them. In my first year of high school I was miserable and sad and I did not enjoy any of it, not really. But now I see that it was necessary and God was only protecting me.
I think many people totally underestimate just how big an influence the people we hang about with can have on us, friends can be great and can uplift you and can really enrich who you are, but they can also have the complete opposite effect. If I would still be spending time with those so-called ‘friends’, I would be a completely different person. If I look at them now, I don’t mean to be harsh, but they are such a bad example; the way they talk, dress and even what they do in their spare time. I now see that God separated me from them to protect me, 1 CORINTHIANS 10:13
For nearly one year I had hung about with that circle of friends, but God provided a new, better friend. On that exact day that I had broken away from them, another girl introduced herself, and we have been friends ever since. With these new friends I can have an honest and fun relationship, while not being over-influenced by the world. I am so grateful that God cares for me and I believe He has handpicked friends for me that can help me, and not to forget that I can help them. Praise the Lord!
Sophie from Scotland – age 15
I wanted to share a small something on the Biblical characteristics of a friend. I think the No.1 best thing to do for getting friends is to be a friend yourself. It’s that simple! Not only is that a good way to make friends, but it is a vital part of keeping a friendship going. Here are a few of the Biblical characteristics of a friend:
1. There are only a few close friends (PROVERBS 18:24). Jesus himself
had his 12, his 3 and his 1.
2. A friend gives himself (JOHN 15:13). This means that they have a readiness to serve the other.
3. A friend knows you deeply (JAMES 5:16). They are people who we can be ourselves with.
4. A friend loves unconditionally (PROVERBS 17:17).
5. A friend gives good advice (PROVERBS 27:9).
6. A friend speaks the truth in love (PROVERBS 27:6).
7. A friend encourages you (JOB 6:14).
8. A friend does not fear a clash with you (PROVERBS 27:17). Clashes cannot be avoided but they can be solved.
9. A friend is delicate (PROVERBS 26:18-19). They are aware of your sensitive spots.
10. A friend is loyal and stays by your side (PROVERBS 16:28B).
Source: Pulpit Speech II, Preacher Silcox, gochristianhelps.com
I am really very fortunate for being in a church where I am blessed with very special friends that care for me and, are also great fun. I also, however, have friends outside of the church, in school for example, and have recently come to realise just how important it is to have good friends.
When I started high school nearly five years ago, like most kids I made a couple of friends. We chatted and did the things that teenagers normally do. One ‘friend’ however, gave me a very hard time, I tried to be kind to her, but she continued to be very nasty and as a result of this I was not a very happy kid in fact I was so, so miserable and I eventually broke away from them. In my first year of high school I was miserable and sad and I did not enjoy any of it, not really. But now I see that it was necessary and God was only protecting me.
I think many people totally underestimate just how big an influence the people we hang about with can have on us, friends can be great and can uplift you and can really enrich who you are, but they can also have the complete opposite effect. If I would still be spending time with those so-called ‘friends’, I would be a completely different person. If I look at them now, I don’t mean to be harsh, but they are such a bad example; the way they talk, dress and even what they do in their spare time. I now see that God separated me from them to protect me, 1 CORINTHIANS 10:13
For nearly one year I had hung about with that circle of friends, but God provided a new, better friend. On that exact day that I had broken away from them, another girl introduced herself, and we have been friends ever since. With these new friends I can have an honest and fun relationship, while not being over-influenced by the world. I am so grateful that God cares for me and I believe He has handpicked friends for me that can help me, and not to forget that I can help them. Praise the Lord!
Sophie from Scotland – age 15
From Abuse to Freedom
It’s a long shot being here and brave enough to stand before you this day.
I came from a family who struggled in life because of poverty. Also, my father was irresponsible. I have 11 siblings living in Mindanao that I never met again since we were separated when I was little.
I witnessed how my mother suffered in every situation. But the worst thing my father did was sexually abuse me several times. Since then I became quiet and I never told anyone because I felt better if no one knew. And I kept asking myself how a heartless father could do this to his child. He was supposed to protect me but I felt like he was killing me softly.
These experiences resulted in my violent reactions when I saw girls of my age being bullied. Then one time I seriously injured my male classmate by stabbing his left eye which caused him to be blinded. Then his mother sent me to jail for four hours just to give me a lesson but it didn’t help.
The population in my house was growing and we didn’t have enough food to eat. My father didn’t have stable work. Sometimes we only ate one meal a day. So, my mother decided to send me to my aunt’s house thinking that I could have a better life if I stayed with my aunt.
What she didn’t know was that I lived miserably while at my aunt’s house. She treated me cruelly like a slave. Almost every day I experienced physical and verbal abuse.
The worst experience I had while living with my aunt was when my older cousin sexually abused me. I felt confused and had no one to turn to. I felt like I was in the middle of nowhere.
I kept going back to my mother’s house but she resisted taking me in, telling me to go back to my aunt’s because she couldn’t support me. I cried but nobody listened to me. I felt all alone, until one day my mother sent my sister to live with me so that I would not feel alone.
But my sister did not live with my aunt very long. My aunt treated her badly also and my sister ran away. I learned that she lived with my other relative. That was the last time we saw each other. I continued to strive in my aunt’s house because I had nowhere to go.
After some time, we moved to Cebu and lived together with my other relative. Sexual abuse happened to me again with the husband of my other relative. I asked myself why God allowed my innocence to be abused this way. If there is a God why am I surrounded with evil people?
As days passed I continued to go on with my life pretending to be okay. I pretended that everything was normal for me.
During my high school days, I’ve had a lot of bad experiences. Finally, one day I became rebellious. It was no longer me; my respectful behavior was gone. My anger and frustration were growing and I didn’t understand myself. I satisfied myself by doing evil acts. I got arrested and detained for one day because of shoplifting and that caused my aunt to let me go.
That was the greatest thing I had ever done because finally I had become free from living in hell. The moment I got out of my aunt’s house I felt like I was free from prison.
Then I started building up walls between me and my to hide the fact that I had been abused. Then I moved to Manila and found a family who really cared. They showed me love and I worked for them as a babysitter of their child.
At first it was good enough, but I was still feeling empty. My past kept haunting me and most of the time I ended up alone and crying. I still burned up with anger, insecurities, bitterness, jealousy and hatred.
My past had tremendous impact upon my life. It opened doors of evil for me. I had a drug addiction; a smoking habit and I was having bad relationship. I became one of the boys until one of my friends dared me to have one drink with him, so I agreed. We both got drunk and things that I did not expect to happen, happened.
So now he’s the father of my daughter. Although the father of my child had never left me I was still living in my past. I had no satisfaction and my anger was still there. All the things that had happened to me —all those nightmares — kept coming back. There was still emptiness in my heart and I still did evil acts. Three times I had an abortion.
In 2011 I worked in Singapore but felt out in the middle of nowhere and I still had no satisfaction. Inside of my heart and my mind was an emptiness and hollowness. My life had no direction. I always got terminated from jobs because I always fought back every time anyone corrected or criticized me.
In October 2014, I moved back to the Philippines and stayed there for two years. Then I applied for a job in Europe. In the midst of August 2015, I got a message request on Facebook asking for my real name. The person told me that I looked like their sister who was lost long ago. I replied with my real name. Then she called me up. That was the quietest talk I’ve ever had with my sister because we couldn’t stop crying. We both understood the feelings of intense longing we had felt for each other for a long time.
She wanted me to go to Hong Kong but I said no because I had an employer waiting for me at the time. I was scheduled to go to Europe but it was not meant for me because my employer backed out. So, I agreed to go to Hong Kong. I had no idea that it was God’s plan to bring me to Hong Kong all the way from the Philippines.
On August 10,2016, I arrived at the Hong Kong International Airport. And finally, on August 21, 2016, I was reunited with my sister for the first time. She told me that my father died three years back, but my anger burst out again and I told her that it didn’t matter how many times he died; he could never repay the damage that he had done in my life because I was still suffering from the pain that he had caused.
My sister told me that I needed to forgive my father, so that I could live freely. One evening, on September 24, 2016, at Victoria Park, while sitting alone, I talked to God. I told him that I was tired and fed up with this kind of life. And I asked God if he could send someone to me who could bring me into His hands.
God answered right away. He sent Riza, and from that moment on Riza started sharing with me her experiences with God. I was astonished at what I heard. After she spoke with me, she prayed for me, and she invited me to accept Jesus Christ as my savior and that was the beginning of my journey to God.
Then I started to attend a group of fellowship. I knew that I needed to be saved, to accept Jesus, and that His work was sufficient to assure me of God’s love for me and a place in heaven. God is able to take the mess of our past and turn it into a message. He can take the trials and tests and turn them into a testimony. I was no longer empty; my life was filled with a sense of purpose.
I am amazed by God’s grace and forgiveness. There was also a huge difference on the inside; for the first time in my life I knew contentment. God will continue to give me the grace to resist and overcome sins. I no longer live my past because God lives in me. My name is Lisa — once lost — but God redeemed and found me.
Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:18-19
It’s a long shot being here and brave enough to stand before you this day.
I came from a family who struggled in life because of poverty. Also, my father was irresponsible. I have 11 siblings living in Mindanao that I never met again since we were separated when I was little.
I witnessed how my mother suffered in every situation. But the worst thing my father did was sexually abuse me several times. Since then I became quiet and I never told anyone because I felt better if no one knew. And I kept asking myself how a heartless father could do this to his child. He was supposed to protect me but I felt like he was killing me softly.
These experiences resulted in my violent reactions when I saw girls of my age being bullied. Then one time I seriously injured my male classmate by stabbing his left eye which caused him to be blinded. Then his mother sent me to jail for four hours just to give me a lesson but it didn’t help.
The population in my house was growing and we didn’t have enough food to eat. My father didn’t have stable work. Sometimes we only ate one meal a day. So, my mother decided to send me to my aunt’s house thinking that I could have a better life if I stayed with my aunt.
What she didn’t know was that I lived miserably while at my aunt’s house. She treated me cruelly like a slave. Almost every day I experienced physical and verbal abuse.
The worst experience I had while living with my aunt was when my older cousin sexually abused me. I felt confused and had no one to turn to. I felt like I was in the middle of nowhere.
I kept going back to my mother’s house but she resisted taking me in, telling me to go back to my aunt’s because she couldn’t support me. I cried but nobody listened to me. I felt all alone, until one day my mother sent my sister to live with me so that I would not feel alone.
But my sister did not live with my aunt very long. My aunt treated her badly also and my sister ran away. I learned that she lived with my other relative. That was the last time we saw each other. I continued to strive in my aunt’s house because I had nowhere to go.
After some time, we moved to Cebu and lived together with my other relative. Sexual abuse happened to me again with the husband of my other relative. I asked myself why God allowed my innocence to be abused this way. If there is a God why am I surrounded with evil people?
As days passed I continued to go on with my life pretending to be okay. I pretended that everything was normal for me.
During my high school days, I’ve had a lot of bad experiences. Finally, one day I became rebellious. It was no longer me; my respectful behavior was gone. My anger and frustration were growing and I didn’t understand myself. I satisfied myself by doing evil acts. I got arrested and detained for one day because of shoplifting and that caused my aunt to let me go.
That was the greatest thing I had ever done because finally I had become free from living in hell. The moment I got out of my aunt’s house I felt like I was free from prison.
Then I started building up walls between me and my to hide the fact that I had been abused. Then I moved to Manila and found a family who really cared. They showed me love and I worked for them as a babysitter of their child.
At first it was good enough, but I was still feeling empty. My past kept haunting me and most of the time I ended up alone and crying. I still burned up with anger, insecurities, bitterness, jealousy and hatred.
My past had tremendous impact upon my life. It opened doors of evil for me. I had a drug addiction; a smoking habit and I was having bad relationship. I became one of the boys until one of my friends dared me to have one drink with him, so I agreed. We both got drunk and things that I did not expect to happen, happened.
So now he’s the father of my daughter. Although the father of my child had never left me I was still living in my past. I had no satisfaction and my anger was still there. All the things that had happened to me —all those nightmares — kept coming back. There was still emptiness in my heart and I still did evil acts. Three times I had an abortion.
In 2011 I worked in Singapore but felt out in the middle of nowhere and I still had no satisfaction. Inside of my heart and my mind was an emptiness and hollowness. My life had no direction. I always got terminated from jobs because I always fought back every time anyone corrected or criticized me.
In October 2014, I moved back to the Philippines and stayed there for two years. Then I applied for a job in Europe. In the midst of August 2015, I got a message request on Facebook asking for my real name. The person told me that I looked like their sister who was lost long ago. I replied with my real name. Then she called me up. That was the quietest talk I’ve ever had with my sister because we couldn’t stop crying. We both understood the feelings of intense longing we had felt for each other for a long time.
She wanted me to go to Hong Kong but I said no because I had an employer waiting for me at the time. I was scheduled to go to Europe but it was not meant for me because my employer backed out. So, I agreed to go to Hong Kong. I had no idea that it was God’s plan to bring me to Hong Kong all the way from the Philippines.
On August 10,2016, I arrived at the Hong Kong International Airport. And finally, on August 21, 2016, I was reunited with my sister for the first time. She told me that my father died three years back, but my anger burst out again and I told her that it didn’t matter how many times he died; he could never repay the damage that he had done in my life because I was still suffering from the pain that he had caused.
My sister told me that I needed to forgive my father, so that I could live freely. One evening, on September 24, 2016, at Victoria Park, while sitting alone, I talked to God. I told him that I was tired and fed up with this kind of life. And I asked God if he could send someone to me who could bring me into His hands.
God answered right away. He sent Riza, and from that moment on Riza started sharing with me her experiences with God. I was astonished at what I heard. After she spoke with me, she prayed for me, and she invited me to accept Jesus Christ as my savior and that was the beginning of my journey to God.
Then I started to attend a group of fellowship. I knew that I needed to be saved, to accept Jesus, and that His work was sufficient to assure me of God’s love for me and a place in heaven. God is able to take the mess of our past and turn it into a message. He can take the trials and tests and turn them into a testimony. I was no longer empty; my life was filled with a sense of purpose.
I am amazed by God’s grace and forgiveness. There was also a huge difference on the inside; for the first time in my life I knew contentment. God will continue to give me the grace to resist and overcome sins. I no longer live my past because God lives in me. My name is Lisa — once lost — but God redeemed and found me.
Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:18-19
Hi, my name is Martin.
I grew up in Switzerland in a Christian home and went to church twice a week. I enjoyed growing up with lots of friends and lots of travelling. When I was about 14 years old I was seeking for the Holy Spirit because everyone around me had experienced the baptism of the Holy Spirit and they all said that if I did likewise, my eyes would be opened and my Christian life would start.
So I asked God for about 6 months and then one day during prayer there it was – I had received His Spirit and was speaking in tongues. There is a bit more to that story but let’s keep going... I got baptized and everything was exciting. This lasted for a few months and then it all went back to normal.
About a year later I started having a lot of problems at school. I got bullied a lot. I did not fulfil my teachers or my parent’s expectations and I slipped into a very uneventful life. I spent most of my time after school in front of the TV or on the internet, or playing computer games. Every Sunday and Wednesday I would go to church meetings and pray and read the Bible a little.
The Bible says we cannot follow the world and God at the same time – we have to decide for one or the other:
MATTHEW 6:24 "No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."
I was not a Christian anymore. I still went to church but I was not interested in God at all.
Then at the age of 17 I started an apprenticeship as a joiner, but after 1 year the employer said I was too lazy and I should put more effort into the work. Three months later he kicked me out. I found another company that took me on but they also kicked me out after 3 months. So what should I do now? To be honest I wasn’t too concerned; I still lived at home and my parents paid for everything so I wasted time doing nothing.
Then my parents asked me if I would like to go to Scotland for a few months to help out with a church project they organized everything and I agreed, just to get away from home. My parent split up at this time and I sort of just wanted to start something new. I arrived in Perth and from then onwards my life started to slowly change.
After a few months they asked me if I wanted to stay and I agreed. I had two good friends around me and I was doing some work for the church so I liked it. But after about 4 months the work came to an end and I had to find a job. Suddenly I was faced with the hard facts of life and I had to find work and pay rent. I started looking for a job but to be honest I did not really look for one. Often I would sleep till 12 – 2 pm in the afternoon and then ask a few shop if they had any vacancies. The people I was staying with could no longer accommodate me and so I ended up a few weeks living on the street, Bed and breakfast and Salvation army...
For an 18 year old teenager in a foreign country foreign language I was scared and somehow alone. I wasn’t used to that! It was there when I started to cry out to God and started really reading the Bible.
During one night I was reading the bible, kneeling in front of the bed I got at a salvation army hostel, I cried out to God asking him for some kind of answer and suddenly I felt an assurance that I would get a job and everything would be fine.
The scripture in - PSALM 37:39 "But the salvation of the righteous is of the LORD: he is their strength in the time of trouble. 40. And the LORD shall help them, and deliver them: he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in him."
- gave me tremendous strength and I knew the Lord would help me if I trusted in him. So I put all my trust in God and I had confidence that He would supply all my needs.
That week I got a job working at Burger King (Hurrays). I worked there for about 6 months and in this time the Bible came alive for me there were so many answers to all my problems and on top of this, joy and fun and peace and reward just filled my heart. I often was just overwhelmed with the joy of the Lord and could not stop smiling. It was not some kind of superficial joy or something I produced it was just in prayer or reading the bible alone in my room praying and seeking God.
Since then it was not all a bed of roses but the Lord always answered me when I sought him mostly through his Word.
PSALM 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.
I now live in Abernethy just 15 minutes from Perth and recently spent 6 months in Australia and visited a friend in New Zealand. I have a car and finally managed to complete my drivers license. I am halfway though my studies as a civil engineer and I work as a fully qualified joiner and window fitter.
But most of all I spend daily time with God and thank Him for turning my life around to the point where I can start helping others. I know the Lord still has a lot in store for me and I have experienced a lot with God since then– and God can change your life as well.
Martin
I grew up in Switzerland in a Christian home and went to church twice a week. I enjoyed growing up with lots of friends and lots of travelling. When I was about 14 years old I was seeking for the Holy Spirit because everyone around me had experienced the baptism of the Holy Spirit and they all said that if I did likewise, my eyes would be opened and my Christian life would start.
So I asked God for about 6 months and then one day during prayer there it was – I had received His Spirit and was speaking in tongues. There is a bit more to that story but let’s keep going... I got baptized and everything was exciting. This lasted for a few months and then it all went back to normal.
About a year later I started having a lot of problems at school. I got bullied a lot. I did not fulfil my teachers or my parent’s expectations and I slipped into a very uneventful life. I spent most of my time after school in front of the TV or on the internet, or playing computer games. Every Sunday and Wednesday I would go to church meetings and pray and read the Bible a little.
The Bible says we cannot follow the world and God at the same time – we have to decide for one or the other:
MATTHEW 6:24 "No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."
I was not a Christian anymore. I still went to church but I was not interested in God at all.
Then at the age of 17 I started an apprenticeship as a joiner, but after 1 year the employer said I was too lazy and I should put more effort into the work. Three months later he kicked me out. I found another company that took me on but they also kicked me out after 3 months. So what should I do now? To be honest I wasn’t too concerned; I still lived at home and my parents paid for everything so I wasted time doing nothing.
Then my parents asked me if I would like to go to Scotland for a few months to help out with a church project they organized everything and I agreed, just to get away from home. My parent split up at this time and I sort of just wanted to start something new. I arrived in Perth and from then onwards my life started to slowly change.
After a few months they asked me if I wanted to stay and I agreed. I had two good friends around me and I was doing some work for the church so I liked it. But after about 4 months the work came to an end and I had to find a job. Suddenly I was faced with the hard facts of life and I had to find work and pay rent. I started looking for a job but to be honest I did not really look for one. Often I would sleep till 12 – 2 pm in the afternoon and then ask a few shop if they had any vacancies. The people I was staying with could no longer accommodate me and so I ended up a few weeks living on the street, Bed and breakfast and Salvation army...
For an 18 year old teenager in a foreign country foreign language I was scared and somehow alone. I wasn’t used to that! It was there when I started to cry out to God and started really reading the Bible.
During one night I was reading the bible, kneeling in front of the bed I got at a salvation army hostel, I cried out to God asking him for some kind of answer and suddenly I felt an assurance that I would get a job and everything would be fine.
The scripture in - PSALM 37:39 "But the salvation of the righteous is of the LORD: he is their strength in the time of trouble. 40. And the LORD shall help them, and deliver them: he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in him."
- gave me tremendous strength and I knew the Lord would help me if I trusted in him. So I put all my trust in God and I had confidence that He would supply all my needs.
That week I got a job working at Burger King (Hurrays). I worked there for about 6 months and in this time the Bible came alive for me there were so many answers to all my problems and on top of this, joy and fun and peace and reward just filled my heart. I often was just overwhelmed with the joy of the Lord and could not stop smiling. It was not some kind of superficial joy or something I produced it was just in prayer or reading the bible alone in my room praying and seeking God.
Since then it was not all a bed of roses but the Lord always answered me when I sought him mostly through his Word.
PSALM 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.
I now live in Abernethy just 15 minutes from Perth and recently spent 6 months in Australia and visited a friend in New Zealand. I have a car and finally managed to complete my drivers license. I am halfway though my studies as a civil engineer and I work as a fully qualified joiner and window fitter.
But most of all I spend daily time with God and thank Him for turning my life around to the point where I can start helping others. I know the Lord still has a lot in store for me and I have experienced a lot with God since then– and God can change your life as well.
Martin
Hi my name is Virginia and I would like to share a testimony with you.
I was thinking of what it really means to pick up my cross and what I have to do. So, I thought about it and had a look at my life. I realized that I spend so much time doing things I like; such as listening to music, watching TV, surfing the Internet, watching videos on YouTube, but not on the things that God wants me to do.
After a while thinking about this I realized what it actually means to ‘pick your cross’ and why it can be really hard; it means that you surrender all that stuff that takes you away from God and leads you down the wrong path.
1 JOHN 2:15-16 "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man loves the world, the love of the Father is not with him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world."
Also, your habits like watching TV in the evening, maybe you think that's stupid and maybe you can't see what happens to you if you cram your head with those things. I for example had such an experience with searching YouTube for videos. I also thought that' it was not bad what I was searching for, but after a while you can't stop and your searching more and more and suddenly you see things that you wished you had never seen.
Your first thought is "No, that was just a little scene, that’s not going to happen again". And then when you go to bed you'll remember those scenes in your head and maybe it doesn't stop, or you don't want to stop thinking about those scenes or pictures.
Also, your character changes, you have fights with your parents and your thinking turns down the wrong path. I realized that I have to change this otherwise it's going to get harder and harder for me to turn away from all of this.
So, after realizing this, I got a clear picture of what I have to change and what it means to pick up my own cross; to spend my time with God and not on my own wishes and desires.
I hope that this testimony will help you.
Virginia
I was thinking of what it really means to pick up my cross and what I have to do. So, I thought about it and had a look at my life. I realized that I spend so much time doing things I like; such as listening to music, watching TV, surfing the Internet, watching videos on YouTube, but not on the things that God wants me to do.
After a while thinking about this I realized what it actually means to ‘pick your cross’ and why it can be really hard; it means that you surrender all that stuff that takes you away from God and leads you down the wrong path.
1 JOHN 2:15-16 "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man loves the world, the love of the Father is not with him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world."
Also, your habits like watching TV in the evening, maybe you think that's stupid and maybe you can't see what happens to you if you cram your head with those things. I for example had such an experience with searching YouTube for videos. I also thought that' it was not bad what I was searching for, but after a while you can't stop and your searching more and more and suddenly you see things that you wished you had never seen.
Your first thought is "No, that was just a little scene, that’s not going to happen again". And then when you go to bed you'll remember those scenes in your head and maybe it doesn't stop, or you don't want to stop thinking about those scenes or pictures.
Also, your character changes, you have fights with your parents and your thinking turns down the wrong path. I realized that I have to change this otherwise it's going to get harder and harder for me to turn away from all of this.
So, after realizing this, I got a clear picture of what I have to change and what it means to pick up my own cross; to spend my time with God and not on my own wishes and desires.
I hope that this testimony will help you.
Virginia
Hello Everyone,
My name is Caroline and I would like to tell you how the Lord has helped me through difficult times growing up as a Christian.
My parents became part of this Christian Church when they were young. They travelled around Europe as missionaries and experienced a lot of miracles on the way. My two brothers and I grew up in three different countries: France, England and Germany.
I was 12 when we moved back to Germany and that was where the most difficult stage of my life started. In the beginning I got to know all the kids in my new class and they were really interested in who I was and where I came from. After about a year or two that interest turned into ‘this girl is different, we don’t like her’; I didn’t smoke, I didn’t drink, I didn’t go out late at night, I didn’t swear and so on. I became the one that was easy to bully. Most of the bullies were from the same village that I lived in, so I had them on the bus and in school. It started with a nasty photo that got taken of me and put-up on the board in the classroom, to throwing bread at me and progressed to setting my hair on fire. I pretty much hated school. This lasted to the end of my school years. I questioned God ‘Why are you doing this to me? I am not a bad person, why is everyone is treating me like this!’ I never knew why I was going through such a hard time, but I did always get the peace from God that there was a reason for this; I just needed to be patient. (1 CORINTHIANS 10:13, ROMANS 8:28)
When I was around 18, I entered a different stage in my life. I was able to be myself and people treated me normally. I started to get a lot of friends and 'noticed' in a positive way. I got to the stage where I was really attracted to ‘the world’ and all that it offered. I went out clubbing with my friends at the weekend to be part of what everyone else was doing and had a lot of fun. My friends became more important to me than God, but I still my conscience bothered me and meant that I didn’t touch alcohol or cigarettes. People got to know me as the ‘non-drinking clubbing girl’. My walk as a Christian started to go downhill and I didn’t know what to do. So one day I decided to pray my last prayer and ask God for help. I prayed during one of our church prayer meetings and I said to God, “Lord, if you want me to stay in this church and walk a Christian walk then I need your help now, or I will give up!”, a couple of seconds later one of our church members sat down next to me while everyone else was still praying and asked me “Caroline, how are you?”, I immediately burst into tears and felt the love of God all around me.
During my apprenticeship I got to know one of the girls that I used to go to school with, we had never spoken much at school, but this changed after we both joined the same choir. We got to know each other and became really good friends. She knew that I was a Christian, but I had never had the courage to preach to her before. She started to ask a lot of questions and became more and more interested in the Word of God. One day she came along to one of our big church meetings and decided to get saved.
From that moment on I knew the reason why God put me into that horrible classroom together with her. It was worth every single awful day to become her friend and to later see her get saved.
I praise God that He gave me the strength to get through those hard times and now be able to help others that are going through equally difficult times. We never know what God’s plan is, but it sure is greater then what we can imagine. I have found the joy in the Lord now and would not want to change it for all of the pleasures of this world. I would rather look like a fool to the world as a Christian now, than to be a fool before God on Judgment Day!
ROMANS 12:2
1 CORINTHIANS 1:18
My name is Caroline and I would like to tell you how the Lord has helped me through difficult times growing up as a Christian.
My parents became part of this Christian Church when they were young. They travelled around Europe as missionaries and experienced a lot of miracles on the way. My two brothers and I grew up in three different countries: France, England and Germany.
I was 12 when we moved back to Germany and that was where the most difficult stage of my life started. In the beginning I got to know all the kids in my new class and they were really interested in who I was and where I came from. After about a year or two that interest turned into ‘this girl is different, we don’t like her’; I didn’t smoke, I didn’t drink, I didn’t go out late at night, I didn’t swear and so on. I became the one that was easy to bully. Most of the bullies were from the same village that I lived in, so I had them on the bus and in school. It started with a nasty photo that got taken of me and put-up on the board in the classroom, to throwing bread at me and progressed to setting my hair on fire. I pretty much hated school. This lasted to the end of my school years. I questioned God ‘Why are you doing this to me? I am not a bad person, why is everyone is treating me like this!’ I never knew why I was going through such a hard time, but I did always get the peace from God that there was a reason for this; I just needed to be patient. (1 CORINTHIANS 10:13, ROMANS 8:28)
When I was around 18, I entered a different stage in my life. I was able to be myself and people treated me normally. I started to get a lot of friends and 'noticed' in a positive way. I got to the stage where I was really attracted to ‘the world’ and all that it offered. I went out clubbing with my friends at the weekend to be part of what everyone else was doing and had a lot of fun. My friends became more important to me than God, but I still my conscience bothered me and meant that I didn’t touch alcohol or cigarettes. People got to know me as the ‘non-drinking clubbing girl’. My walk as a Christian started to go downhill and I didn’t know what to do. So one day I decided to pray my last prayer and ask God for help. I prayed during one of our church prayer meetings and I said to God, “Lord, if you want me to stay in this church and walk a Christian walk then I need your help now, or I will give up!”, a couple of seconds later one of our church members sat down next to me while everyone else was still praying and asked me “Caroline, how are you?”, I immediately burst into tears and felt the love of God all around me.
During my apprenticeship I got to know one of the girls that I used to go to school with, we had never spoken much at school, but this changed after we both joined the same choir. We got to know each other and became really good friends. She knew that I was a Christian, but I had never had the courage to preach to her before. She started to ask a lot of questions and became more and more interested in the Word of God. One day she came along to one of our big church meetings and decided to get saved.
From that moment on I knew the reason why God put me into that horrible classroom together with her. It was worth every single awful day to become her friend and to later see her get saved.
I praise God that He gave me the strength to get through those hard times and now be able to help others that are going through equally difficult times. We never know what God’s plan is, but it sure is greater then what we can imagine. I have found the joy in the Lord now and would not want to change it for all of the pleasures of this world. I would rather look like a fool to the world as a Christian now, than to be a fool before God on Judgment Day!
ROMANS 12:2
1 CORINTHIANS 1:18
Hi Teens around the world
I would like to share a testimony about trials and sunflowers.
As a few of you know I really like sunflowers and have planted quite a few of them this year. Two of my sunflowers that were planted outside were very gangly and looked quite likely to falling over.
They were also in one of the windiest places. We put a stake next to them, but it didn't seem to help much. As we watched over the next few weeks we could see that they have grown together to support each other, and (because of the wind) have grown very thick stems (thicker than the bamboo stake we used to support them).
I thought that this is a bit like in our Christian walks, we will go through tough times, but if we cling to Jesus He will strengthen us.
Another one of my sunflowers had been planted next to a tree, but sadly had fallen over, you would have thought that it would wilt and die, but it didn't!
It started to grow where it had fallen over and put roots down.
I thought this was a good example of how we shouldn't give up, even if we feel as if we have 'fallen', we should still keep going.
Love in Christ,
Hannah (14)
I would like to share a testimony about trials and sunflowers.
As a few of you know I really like sunflowers and have planted quite a few of them this year. Two of my sunflowers that were planted outside were very gangly and looked quite likely to falling over.
They were also in one of the windiest places. We put a stake next to them, but it didn't seem to help much. As we watched over the next few weeks we could see that they have grown together to support each other, and (because of the wind) have grown very thick stems (thicker than the bamboo stake we used to support them).
I thought that this is a bit like in our Christian walks, we will go through tough times, but if we cling to Jesus He will strengthen us.
Another one of my sunflowers had been planted next to a tree, but sadly had fallen over, you would have thought that it would wilt and die, but it didn't!
It started to grow where it had fallen over and put roots down.
I thought this was a good example of how we shouldn't give up, even if we feel as if we have 'fallen', we should still keep going.
Love in Christ,
Hannah (14)
FIRST THINGS FIRST!
I totally forgot that I need to take time to read and pray before I start my day. It's so easy for us to jump into the busyness of our life's that we forget that God wants us to spend time with him FIRST. Because when you put the first things first, the rest of your day will fall into place. If you think you don't have time, trying giving God the very first moments of your day and see if he doesn't give it back to you times ten!
I totally forgot that I need to take time to read and pray before I start my day. It's so easy for us to jump into the busyness of our life's that we forget that God wants us to spend time with him FIRST. Because when you put the first things first, the rest of your day will fall into place. If you think you don't have time, trying giving God the very first moments of your day and see if he doesn't give it back to you times ten!
For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”
Philippians 4:13 NLT
•
It's not through any of my own power that I can stay positive, motivated, and joy filled. I am not strong enough on my own. By your own power you will fail it will run out. But God strength is endless!! Seeing people who are tired and unmotivated makes me want to screen this from the roof tops! You don't have to this life on your own!! You have a Father who has an UNENDING supply of power and love for you! Stop running from him! Lay aside your pride and let Him take care of you.
- Rachel
Philippians 4:13 NLT
•
It's not through any of my own power that I can stay positive, motivated, and joy filled. I am not strong enough on my own. By your own power you will fail it will run out. But God strength is endless!! Seeing people who are tired and unmotivated makes me want to screen this from the roof tops! You don't have to this life on your own!! You have a Father who has an UNENDING supply of power and love for you! Stop running from him! Lay aside your pride and let Him take care of you.
- Rachel
“‘The Vending Machine God’ is about people thinking that God will answer any question they have, or give them anything that they are wishing for. People believe if they try hard enough God will just get things for them, or do whatever they want.
“It is called the ‘Father Christmas Myth’ because of this. This is not true because He does not want the ability of praying to Him to be taken advantage of.
“In Jeremiah 33:3 God says ‘Call to me and I will answer you’ so He likes when you pray to Him and He likes to answer your prayers.
“However, not useless prayers for your desire. The prayer has to be effective, like praying for a good reason, instead of something you wish you had. Clearly, God is not a Father Christmas Myth. He is a God and Father, He loves to answer your respectable prayers.”
Abbi, age 13
“It is called the ‘Father Christmas Myth’ because of this. This is not true because He does not want the ability of praying to Him to be taken advantage of.
“In Jeremiah 33:3 God says ‘Call to me and I will answer you’ so He likes when you pray to Him and He likes to answer your prayers.
“However, not useless prayers for your desire. The prayer has to be effective, like praying for a good reason, instead of something you wish you had. Clearly, God is not a Father Christmas Myth. He is a God and Father, He loves to answer your respectable prayers.”
Abbi, age 13
My name is: regret, shame, pain, dirty, angry, failure, hated, forgotten. My life is full of valleys, with no mountain in sight. I haven’t seen good in so long I’m not sure it still exists. My story starts out like anybody else. For six years of my life I was the typical kid. Then life got in the way and things started changing.
When I was six I watched my great grandmother take her last breath. Four short months later, at age seven, my dad died. He died from complications from attempted suicide. I was never a “normal” kid after that. I sat alone on the floor during P.E. at school watching the other kids play begging God to just tell them I loved them.
That in itself is way too much for a seven-year old to handle all by herself. I started getting really depressed. I even went as far as attempting suicide. My heart was broken and nobody could or would help me. As time went on I came out of my depression and could see hope again. Then on January 27, 2009 my world crashed. My great aunt died. I was lost and empty. Eleven short months later tragedy struck again. My papaw died. I felt an anger start in my heart that would not soon be quenched.
On June 16, 2012 my faith was put to the test harder than before. My other papaw lost his battle with cancer. I started spiraling. I was depressed, angry, and confused. I wondered why God who is supposed to love me so much kept ruining my life. I started drinking and smoking pot daily. Curling up to a bottle was the only thing getting me through the day. I started giving myself away in pieces and slowly at first, then all at once, until I had nothing left. I looked in the mirror and saw a stranger — a tired, broken stranger. I was a mess. I was only 14 but I felt like I had lived a thousand years.
On October 20, 2013 I knew I couldn’t continue down the road I was on, so I turned to Jesus. I gave my life to him and accepted him as my Savior. I became a new person that day. Jesus saved me from myself. He became my life. I could finally stop fighting. After 10 years of death and pain I was exhausted. I could smile and laugh. My brokenness healed. I had hope for the future. Tragedy still came. August 17, 2014 my world came to a stop once again. My uncle who was my best friend, died. Losing him was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. It didn’t make sense; he was only 46. How could someone that I loved so much and had seen every single day really be gone? Five days later another uncle passed away. I couldn’t take it. My heart was so broken and I was so emotionally exhausted. I felt like running away and never stopping.
This time was different though. I was done running. I asked Jesus to carry me through it and he did. He still is. Because of him I have a smile on my face and a song in my heart. I have valleys, but I also have mountains. I have hope; I see the good in the bad. I am transformed. My name is: joy, peace, over-comer, remembered, redeemed, restored, loved, forgiven.
- Destiny
Hey there Patch Clan.
Yes, it's been a while. I’m making it up to you as we speak. So I wanted to talk about the presence of God. It's felt, it's heard and it's experienced in so many ways and we as Christians know this. A lot of us unfortunately rely on one way of experiencing his presence. All of us go through a growth period with Jesus, where we start to realize there is more to him than what we've been taught or seen. Don't take this as a bad thing, everyone goes through this. It's a refining process, God wants you to be well rounded in every area of him.
So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1John 4:16.
When you choose to obey the very will of God, you come to KNOW him. When you come to know him, you start to realize that feeling the Holy Spirit is just the tip of the iceberg. Jesus is no longer a physical being he gave up that physical form to forgive us of our sins. So, it's only common sense that FEELING the presence of God isn't always necessary. Think of it like this, if you lived in a cold place and every time you stepped outside you felt the sheer cold hit you in the face. This goes on forever since you live in this cold place and then one day you step outside and you don't feel cold. You know it's cold though because it's snowing and it's windy but you can't feel the frigid cold on your face anymore. Just because you don't feel the cold doesn't mean it isn't cold.
The same thing goes for Gods Presence. The Holy Spirit is with you always just like God is, it's another type of way to show your faith in Christ. Just like faith is believing in something you can't see, it's also believing in something you can't feel at times.
I personally went through this myself. I was so dependent on the feeling of the presence and not the presence itself. When I didn't feel God, I started to think that I was doing something wrong but the whole time I was doing everything right. The feeling of God near you is the most obvious proof to know that God is there with you. But God likes to challenge us because he knows we can handle it so he takes away those things that we are dependent upon and sees if we can be still and know him. I remember my grandmother telling me that this is how God is starts to feed you "meat," he's training you for bigger things than just tiny little feelings.
Feeling God's presence shouldn't be a sign of you doing things right. The very choice that you decided to praise God is the very fact that you have done something right. We get so comfortable with one way of praising God and relying on the same pattern that when things change we start to feel like we're doing something wrong. That is not it at all, it's simply God giving you A bit of a rough terrain to walk on, yeah it's going to be annoying and yes it's going to be painful. Change is everywhere not just in life but also with God as well God will change the path that you are walking on to get you to see him in a different way than the one that you were used to. Change with God is always good it may feel bad at the time but remember it is always good.
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18.
You may not understand why God has changed the path that you're on but do realize that whatever God does is for a higher purpose he does things with the reasons that we may not understand sometimes. We may not see where he is leading us but that's Okay. It's like two different people looking at a painting and having two different perspectives of what it means. One May not understand the perspective of the other but it doesn't make it a wrong perspective even though you cannot see it. Your vision of your life is about you but God's vision of your life is about him.
What it comes down to is that even though the presence of God is not felt, it doesn't mean that god isnt there doing something in you. And it doesn't necessarily mean that you're doing something wrong either, New things experienced with God are going to feel funny at times but there is no right or wrong way to experience God. There is no right or wrong way to worship God or to talk to God. That's the beauty of worship. So when things start to feel a little weird when you worship Christ, thank him for what he is silently doing in your life.
Sarah Jane.
Yes, it's been a while. I’m making it up to you as we speak. So I wanted to talk about the presence of God. It's felt, it's heard and it's experienced in so many ways and we as Christians know this. A lot of us unfortunately rely on one way of experiencing his presence. All of us go through a growth period with Jesus, where we start to realize there is more to him than what we've been taught or seen. Don't take this as a bad thing, everyone goes through this. It's a refining process, God wants you to be well rounded in every area of him.
So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1John 4:16.
When you choose to obey the very will of God, you come to KNOW him. When you come to know him, you start to realize that feeling the Holy Spirit is just the tip of the iceberg. Jesus is no longer a physical being he gave up that physical form to forgive us of our sins. So, it's only common sense that FEELING the presence of God isn't always necessary. Think of it like this, if you lived in a cold place and every time you stepped outside you felt the sheer cold hit you in the face. This goes on forever since you live in this cold place and then one day you step outside and you don't feel cold. You know it's cold though because it's snowing and it's windy but you can't feel the frigid cold on your face anymore. Just because you don't feel the cold doesn't mean it isn't cold.
The same thing goes for Gods Presence. The Holy Spirit is with you always just like God is, it's another type of way to show your faith in Christ. Just like faith is believing in something you can't see, it's also believing in something you can't feel at times.
I personally went through this myself. I was so dependent on the feeling of the presence and not the presence itself. When I didn't feel God, I started to think that I was doing something wrong but the whole time I was doing everything right. The feeling of God near you is the most obvious proof to know that God is there with you. But God likes to challenge us because he knows we can handle it so he takes away those things that we are dependent upon and sees if we can be still and know him. I remember my grandmother telling me that this is how God is starts to feed you "meat," he's training you for bigger things than just tiny little feelings.
Feeling God's presence shouldn't be a sign of you doing things right. The very choice that you decided to praise God is the very fact that you have done something right. We get so comfortable with one way of praising God and relying on the same pattern that when things change we start to feel like we're doing something wrong. That is not it at all, it's simply God giving you A bit of a rough terrain to walk on, yeah it's going to be annoying and yes it's going to be painful. Change is everywhere not just in life but also with God as well God will change the path that you are walking on to get you to see him in a different way than the one that you were used to. Change with God is always good it may feel bad at the time but remember it is always good.
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18.
You may not understand why God has changed the path that you're on but do realize that whatever God does is for a higher purpose he does things with the reasons that we may not understand sometimes. We may not see where he is leading us but that's Okay. It's like two different people looking at a painting and having two different perspectives of what it means. One May not understand the perspective of the other but it doesn't make it a wrong perspective even though you cannot see it. Your vision of your life is about you but God's vision of your life is about him.
What it comes down to is that even though the presence of God is not felt, it doesn't mean that god isnt there doing something in you. And it doesn't necessarily mean that you're doing something wrong either, New things experienced with God are going to feel funny at times but there is no right or wrong way to experience God. There is no right or wrong way to worship God or to talk to God. That's the beauty of worship. So when things start to feel a little weird when you worship Christ, thank him for what he is silently doing in your life.
Sarah Jane.
Hi I'm Mikayla, I'm fifteen and I've lived in the church life all of my life. I enjoy swimming, reading and writing books. I believe in mermaids. (I know I'm weird.) I'm a Christian. Welcome to my thoughts.
May, 2016
When my family and I were on our way to church; my dad turned on the radio, by my request, and we listened to K-Love. Do Something by Matthew West was on; I normally start singing with the artists but decided not to, I just listened to the lyrics.
The chorus of the song is my favorite thing and so true. If we as teenagers DID do something we could change the world for the better. Images a world where people loved each other, and everyone had that amazing fire for God.
I challenge you (yes YOU) to do something, invite that new kid at school to your youth group or church. Sit by someone you normally don't hangout with and start a conversation. Smile, and let the glory of God shine through. I will do this challenge with you! Try something new!
By the way, I can't believe school is almost out, if felt like only yesterday the year was just beginning. Have an amazing summer!!
May, 2016
When my family and I were on our way to church; my dad turned on the radio, by my request, and we listened to K-Love. Do Something by Matthew West was on; I normally start singing with the artists but decided not to, I just listened to the lyrics.
The chorus of the song is my favorite thing and so true. If we as teenagers DID do something we could change the world for the better. Images a world where people loved each other, and everyone had that amazing fire for God.
I challenge you (yes YOU) to do something, invite that new kid at school to your youth group or church. Sit by someone you normally don't hangout with and start a conversation. Smile, and let the glory of God shine through. I will do this challenge with you! Try something new!
By the way, I can't believe school is almost out, if felt like only yesterday the year was just beginning. Have an amazing summer!!
I Felt Dead Inside
Cutting myself helped me release the bad feelings inside. So why did I always feel worse afterward?
Two weeks before the end of my sophomore year, I noticed a teacher's gaze linger on my arms just a second too long. I panicked as I imagined what he was thinking. How on earth did her arm get that way? Could it have been an accident?
Before he could ask, I chuckled and told him the scratches came from one of my family's cats. He bought the story, even though my nervous laughter was half an octave too high.
I was usually more careful—wearing long sleeves to cover my arms, changing for gym in a corner so the other girls wouldn't see the marks on my stomach—but today I'd carelessly worn a short-sleeved shirt and almost got caught. That was one of several times my secret could have come to light. But somehow, I made it to graduation without anyone finding out the truth: I was a cutter.
I grew up in church and Christian school, and until I was 13, my childlike faith was unshakeable. I won contests for memorizing Scripture verses and lived for the approval I got at church.
At the same time, I had a difficult time at home. My mom was often busy, and my dad, who wasn't a Christian then, was usually yelling at me—when he wasn't ignoring me. I spent my childhood trying to fill the hole that loneliness left inside.
I was depressed. I was full of emotions I couldn't handle alone. But since I got straight A’s, was rarely in trouble and didn't seem to need close friends, no one noticed how bad I was hurting. Late one August night when I was 13, I sat in my mom's home office watching TV. As scene after scene of smiling, laughing people flashed across the screen, I felt overwhelmed. I'd had another rotten day, and the heaviness in my heart was as inescapable as the Alabama humidity.
… I couldn't stop the bleeding. I didn't want to die. I only wanted to stop hurting, and cutting relieved my inner pain for a few moments.
I rummaged through Mom's desk drawers and found a small, sharp knife. My glasses fogged over with tears. My mind raced, full of unwelcome thoughts that finally caught up with me.
What's wrong with me?
The world around me seemed still, peaceful. Crickets chirped contentedly in the summer night.
Why can't I have any of that peace?
The soft rumble of the TV's laugh track echoed off the walls.
Why am I so alone?
I gasped, choking back sobs in the sauna-thick air and drew the knife across my arm.
Cutting seemed at first to give me a release for my feelings. It made me feel like I was in control. But like any addiction, the cutting began to control me. For the first few minutes, I'd feel better. Then the shame I felt afterward for hurting myself caused even worse pain than the hurt I'd tried to escape. Years passed, and I couldn't stop.
One night, everything changed.
I sat on the balcony of my apartment and looked into the April night. The clear sky was filled with stars and the scent of spring—of life—wafted along in the air. But I felt dead inside.
Already drunk, I went inside and mixed another drink. I found a kitchen knife and was reckless.
When I couldn't stop the bleeding, I chewed a dozen mints to mask the scent of alcohol on my breath and drove to the hospital. I didn't want to die. I only wanted to stop hurting, and cutting relieved my inner pain for a few moments.
I knew the nurse in the ER was on to me when she asked, "How did your arm come to look like that?"
There was no way the usual lie about my cat would work.
I told her what happened in a bored, matter-of-fact voice. "I cut my arm. I was mad." I shrugged and looked away, but not before I saw the disgust in her eyes. She'd come to work to care for people who'd been hurt by things out of their control— car accidents, fires—and here she was, helping someone who'd injured herself.
I was ashamed.
I started seeing a counselor after the ER trip. The first day in his office, I flopped into the leather chair across from his desk. He glanced at my paperwork, swiveled to face me, and said, "So, you're depressed, and you suspect you have a drinking problem. Anything else I should know?"
I looked him directly in the eyes. "Yeah. This. I'd like to stop doing this." In one motion, I pushed my sleeve up to my elbow.
He nodded without judgment or pity. "OK," he said, and held my gaze long enough to show me he wasn't avoiding my eyes. He placed me in the hospital's psych unit because he was afraid I would commit suicide. He was right to be afraid. I might have taken my life or died the way many cutters do—in an accident that looks like suicide, a cut too near an artery that causes death before the cutter can get help.
After treatment at the psych ward, I saw my counselor regularly for nearly two years. I realized how destructive my behavior was when he asked me to imagine myself cutting my worst enemy the way I'd cut myself.
I couldn't picture it. My legs squeaked against the leather chair as I shifted, eyes shut, trying to imagine myself hurting the person I liked least. I would never do that to another person, not even people who treated me badly. Why was I willing to do it to myself?
My counselor helped me understand that I'd become so desperately sad because I felt utterly alone. I felt separated from everyone—even God—because I focused on my painful past instead of asking for help to look toward the future.
My counselor helped me change my thinking, but the permanent changes in my heart came from God's love. A godly Christian became a mentor and caring adult friend to me. He helped me understand I was broken. I knew that on my own, I was helpless to stop hating myself.
But I wasn't unfixable. Like everyone else in this broken world, I needed God to be my Father, protector, Lord and Savior. Accepting Jesus gave me the connection and the firmness in faith that made the difference in my healing.
My mentor suggested I read Brennan Manning's book, The Ragamuffin Gospel. As I read, I learned that I didn't have to be afraid of God. Asking him for help wasn't like going to a mean boss and asking for time off from work. Instead, I, God's little girl, was asking him for things he already wanted to give me: love and care, help and healing, protection and guidance.
Everything has changed for me in the six years since that night in the ER. I struggled with my addiction to cutting for a while, but I'm proud to say that it's been more than four years since I last cut.
That doesn't mean it's been easy. Not long ago, a friend hurt me deeply, and I felt the old urge. But with God's help, I didn't give in.
When I think about how I cope with pain and loneliness, I think of a toolbox. A few years ago, my toolbox only had two things inside: a razor blade and a bottle of rum. Now, it's filled with healthy things. Things like good books that feed my mind and soothe my heart. A pair of walking shoes, because a 3-mile walk can solve almost anything. A cell phone programmed with numbers of people who care about me, like my counselor, who I wouldn't hesitate to call in a time of need. A schedule of meetings for a 12-step group. A journal and several good pens. And a Bible, because God's Word brings comfort that earthly things can never provide.
I've been through a lot of difficult stuff in the last four years, but the love of my heavenly Father and the people he's placed in my life have seen me through. Now, I can reach out to cutters because I know how they feel. I want them to know that God's love is more powerful than any knife or razor blade. His love heals all inner scars.
- Holly
Within the last year, three of my friends tried to commit suicide. Life was too much for them. They couldn't hack it. This world ate them up until their only thought of escape was death.
Loneliness is universal. It eats inside your system. It brings a vacuum of emptiness, a fear of death, a gnawing hunger of wanting to be understood and loved. Loneliness is a sickness. It hurts. For some it hurts so much that they do anything to run away from it.
You can have a million close friends and still be lonely. You can be the bestlooking, most popular, most successful person on earth and still be lonely. No matter what you do, where you go, or what you try to be, loneliness still eats your heart. Lonely people need love: warm, flowing love…love can kill loneliness.
- Jason Challoner
Hey Patch, it's been ages and I apologize. It's been a crazy and amazing last year and I wanted to tell you a little about it. I've been singing and writing more. I have fans on a few writing websites and I can't tell you how many times I've read a message from a fan that has touched my heart. Or someone that I've inspired. I'm humbled and grateful for those who tell me I'm appreciated.
The funny thing is, the most comments I get is from fanfiction or a poem. I never had the intention of inspiring or helping someone cheer up. Have you ever felt that way? Where you just do what you love to do and people get inspired by you and you weren't even trying?
That's what I wanted to talk to you guys about today. I'm sorry if I talked about myself a little too much. My devotional today is about your gifts, talents and abilities and how they can be used for Christ.
Romans 12:6
Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith;
Everyone's gifts are different; some can sing some can dance. Some may write and some may paint. The point is, everything you love to do, every talent can be used to spread the word of God. Even being in the same room with someone and talking to them can change a life and you might not even know it.
I met an extraordinary guy in a chat room one night. He was so talented in art and drawing, he had extreme problems at home that brought him close to suicide. He logged on that night to have fun one last night and I met him. He told me, "I was curious about you and I wanted to know more." This guy is now part of my family, he told me that I saved his life that night.... I’m still dumbfounded even saying it, all I did was talk to him. It was a casual conversation and I saved the guys life.
The truth is, being unashamed of the grace that God has given you sheds a blinding white light to those who need it the most. There are so many people you have probably saved, just by smiling at them or just by saying hello.
More than 80% of people said in a survey that they would've kept from hurting themselves if just a stranger would've given them a smile or a wave. That's all it takes, and guess what? That's a gift as well. You are such a remarkable masterpiece of gifts, full of holiness and joy. Don't shut it away, don't be afraid of it. God gave you those gifts for you to help those who are hurting. I remember so many things my pastor has said through the years but one phrase always stuck with me to this day, "Everyone needs you in their life."
I can't tell you how true that is nowadays. We have our bad days, of course but...smile anyway. Laugh anyway! Sing, dance, act like a goofball anyway! Someone's life may literally depend on it. Never be ashamed of what God has given you.
That's what makes you, you.
1Peter 4:10.
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace:
You at birth, has received a gift from God. No one on the face of this earth is born useless or stupid. Each of them have a specific gift unlike anyone else's. God doesn't want you to just put it on a shelf and keep it nice. If a commander gave you a sword, you wouldn't sit and look at it would you? No, use it to the best of your ability and you will be surprised at how many lives you have touched just by being the you that God made you to be. You know that song, "we could be heroes?" I don't know who sings it but...it's seriously true. You could be a hero just by being you and using what God gave you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made so please I beg of you fan that gorgeous tail of yours and strut your Godly stuff! You are a difference in someone's life everyday and you may not even know it. Isn't that amazing?!
There is a theory called the Butterfly effect, meaning that something so small in one part of the world can have large effects somewhere else.
Be the butterfly and effect those around you, it's worth it. The smallest things you do can be the biggest blessing to someone who needs it.
I hope you guys have a great rest of the week I just encourage you all to be awesome, ambitious and brilliant!
Sarah Jane.
The funny thing is, the most comments I get is from fanfiction or a poem. I never had the intention of inspiring or helping someone cheer up. Have you ever felt that way? Where you just do what you love to do and people get inspired by you and you weren't even trying?
That's what I wanted to talk to you guys about today. I'm sorry if I talked about myself a little too much. My devotional today is about your gifts, talents and abilities and how they can be used for Christ.
Romans 12:6
Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith;
Everyone's gifts are different; some can sing some can dance. Some may write and some may paint. The point is, everything you love to do, every talent can be used to spread the word of God. Even being in the same room with someone and talking to them can change a life and you might not even know it.
I met an extraordinary guy in a chat room one night. He was so talented in art and drawing, he had extreme problems at home that brought him close to suicide. He logged on that night to have fun one last night and I met him. He told me, "I was curious about you and I wanted to know more." This guy is now part of my family, he told me that I saved his life that night.... I’m still dumbfounded even saying it, all I did was talk to him. It was a casual conversation and I saved the guys life.
The truth is, being unashamed of the grace that God has given you sheds a blinding white light to those who need it the most. There are so many people you have probably saved, just by smiling at them or just by saying hello.
More than 80% of people said in a survey that they would've kept from hurting themselves if just a stranger would've given them a smile or a wave. That's all it takes, and guess what? That's a gift as well. You are such a remarkable masterpiece of gifts, full of holiness and joy. Don't shut it away, don't be afraid of it. God gave you those gifts for you to help those who are hurting. I remember so many things my pastor has said through the years but one phrase always stuck with me to this day, "Everyone needs you in their life."
I can't tell you how true that is nowadays. We have our bad days, of course but...smile anyway. Laugh anyway! Sing, dance, act like a goofball anyway! Someone's life may literally depend on it. Never be ashamed of what God has given you.
That's what makes you, you.
1Peter 4:10.
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace:
You at birth, has received a gift from God. No one on the face of this earth is born useless or stupid. Each of them have a specific gift unlike anyone else's. God doesn't want you to just put it on a shelf and keep it nice. If a commander gave you a sword, you wouldn't sit and look at it would you? No, use it to the best of your ability and you will be surprised at how many lives you have touched just by being the you that God made you to be. You know that song, "we could be heroes?" I don't know who sings it but...it's seriously true. You could be a hero just by being you and using what God gave you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made so please I beg of you fan that gorgeous tail of yours and strut your Godly stuff! You are a difference in someone's life everyday and you may not even know it. Isn't that amazing?!
There is a theory called the Butterfly effect, meaning that something so small in one part of the world can have large effects somewhere else.
Be the butterfly and effect those around you, it's worth it. The smallest things you do can be the biggest blessing to someone who needs it.
I hope you guys have a great rest of the week I just encourage you all to be awesome, ambitious and brilliant!
Sarah Jane.
Heart thoughts from Natalie
I was saved by God's glory,
His son who died for me,
Beaten, broken, gory,
Jesus set me free.
Free from pain and hurt.
Free from suffering.
Free from filth and dirt.
Free from Satan's luring.
I am His daughter.
A sister to many.
He is our Father.
To all and to any.
So glory to God,
Is what we call out.
We don't sit and nod.
We scream and we shout.
We call out His Name,
We rise up together.
In life's unfair game,
We're winning forever.
And here's another poem I wrote when I was in the process of ending a friendship that just wasn't helping me in my pursuit of God(a lot of my friends were angry at me during the process. Though I bore no ill will towards the one I was breaking it off with.) This one's called Alone, But Not Lonely:
I caused a war that I cannot fix.
All they can do now is start laying bricks.
Build the city back up, twice as strong.
"Because they are right, and I am wrong."
But my heart told me then, get away from that sin.
So I did what I could so that God may win.
Now my friends are mad and I feel numb.
But in my mind, it's for God's Kingdom.
Some call me heartless, some take the blame.
Some don't even know, and some curse my name.
Right now I'm alone, with no feelings within.
I'm sitting here well, while they are broken.
I can't take it back or clean the mess.
In fact, right now, I couldn't feel any less.
This war that's begun is probably far from over.
But truth be told, I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover.
But love originates not from me, but from God.
And He told me that was not my path, so I nod.
I follow what He commands so in His name is glory.
Not what Earth demands for it's politically correct story.
I refuse to please you humans in order to get more.
Because my life is not my own, and it's certainly not yours.
I follow my Lord for He sent Himself in flesh.
To save you and me from an everlasting death.
So I'll never feel sorry for serving His name.
Because to me, life is more than a gamble or a game.
With me forever is the One and the Only.
So while I'm alone, I will never be lonely.
And finally, my testimony.
A few years back I was battling doubt when it came to God. I always asked, "Is He really real? What if He's not? What if some other religion is the right one?" and I never could find anyone to give me the answers. My parents would say, "Of course He is, it says it in the Bible." but then that brought up the question, "What if the Bible is wrong? It's been so many years since it was written, surely it must've been edited by people throughout the years. What if the Bible was just written by a bunch of men for the sake of being written?" Pretty common questions, I'd imagine. But the thing is, I didn't want disbelieve. No, in fact, all I wanted to was to belief. I just couldn't find enough faith to do that. On top of all these questions, my parents were (and still are) blatantly homophobic, despite the fact that my dad's best friend is gay. They claim that they love homosexuals, yet they make horribly derogatory comments towards them and they mock them constantly. I have always hated their attitudes and still do. I came home one day from seeing RENT the musical with my friends and I started talking about it to my mom and she (metaphorically) slapped me in the face with the comment, "I'm terrified that you're going to hell." That broke me right then and there and from then on, I decided to deny the fact that homosexuality was a sin. I had youtubers that I watched and connected with that were gay, I didn't want to hate them or hate what they are. No way. But despite all of that, I still wanted to find a belief in God. I cried out to Him, begging for a sign. Naturally, I wanted for Jesus to appear in my room or at least an angel in my dreams. This was longed for even more because my mother had claimed to dream about Satan and Jesus when she was 12 where Satan was this evil clown holding a needle(my mom's worst fears then) and when she resisted his temptation, she was inside an office building with clocks going off all around and she walked out and saw Jesus and he asked her if she accepted him and she said yes and everything was grand. I wanted that so badly, and not getting it made me become so upset. But then I started noticing something. I kept finding out that bands I listened to were Christian bands or had Christian members. And this was just random, out of the blue stuff. And then I found an article, or testimony, written by a previously super Atheist lesbian turned Christian heterosexual. That article completely washed away my denial and I realized that the only thing that truly matters anyways is sharing the gospel in LOVE. I realized that condemnation and arguments was never going to bring a nonbeliever into the light and from then on, I vowed to spread only love despite someone else's sins. And after that, I came across more and more Christian artists and even went to a free Moriah Peters concert that was in the area and I was on fire for the Lord. I connected to God through music and fell in love with Him by listening to His word spoken through another's mouth. I have yet to complete(or even really tear into) the Bible(I'm on Genesis chapter 37 or so?) and I haven't been able to go to church recently(I have no transportation there), but I'm working on serving the Lord as best I can. I am dealing with an unsightly and unfortunate addiction. My parents don't even know. Only my closest friends know about it and that confession has helped me deal with it a lot better recently. I wish to do better for my boyfriend, myself, and most importantly God. But I'm sure plenty of Christians deal with this kind of thing and it's not just guys either!) That's my story, and I hope this might enlighten or help any others struggling with doubt and addiction
I was saved by God's glory,
His son who died for me,
Beaten, broken, gory,
Jesus set me free.
Free from pain and hurt.
Free from suffering.
Free from filth and dirt.
Free from Satan's luring.
I am His daughter.
A sister to many.
He is our Father.
To all and to any.
So glory to God,
Is what we call out.
We don't sit and nod.
We scream and we shout.
We call out His Name,
We rise up together.
In life's unfair game,
We're winning forever.
And here's another poem I wrote when I was in the process of ending a friendship that just wasn't helping me in my pursuit of God(a lot of my friends were angry at me during the process. Though I bore no ill will towards the one I was breaking it off with.) This one's called Alone, But Not Lonely:
I caused a war that I cannot fix.
All they can do now is start laying bricks.
Build the city back up, twice as strong.
"Because they are right, and I am wrong."
But my heart told me then, get away from that sin.
So I did what I could so that God may win.
Now my friends are mad and I feel numb.
But in my mind, it's for God's Kingdom.
Some call me heartless, some take the blame.
Some don't even know, and some curse my name.
Right now I'm alone, with no feelings within.
I'm sitting here well, while they are broken.
I can't take it back or clean the mess.
In fact, right now, I couldn't feel any less.
This war that's begun is probably far from over.
But truth be told, I'm not a fighter, I'm a lover.
But love originates not from me, but from God.
And He told me that was not my path, so I nod.
I follow what He commands so in His name is glory.
Not what Earth demands for it's politically correct story.
I refuse to please you humans in order to get more.
Because my life is not my own, and it's certainly not yours.
I follow my Lord for He sent Himself in flesh.
To save you and me from an everlasting death.
So I'll never feel sorry for serving His name.
Because to me, life is more than a gamble or a game.
With me forever is the One and the Only.
So while I'm alone, I will never be lonely.
And finally, my testimony.
A few years back I was battling doubt when it came to God. I always asked, "Is He really real? What if He's not? What if some other religion is the right one?" and I never could find anyone to give me the answers. My parents would say, "Of course He is, it says it in the Bible." but then that brought up the question, "What if the Bible is wrong? It's been so many years since it was written, surely it must've been edited by people throughout the years. What if the Bible was just written by a bunch of men for the sake of being written?" Pretty common questions, I'd imagine. But the thing is, I didn't want disbelieve. No, in fact, all I wanted to was to belief. I just couldn't find enough faith to do that. On top of all these questions, my parents were (and still are) blatantly homophobic, despite the fact that my dad's best friend is gay. They claim that they love homosexuals, yet they make horribly derogatory comments towards them and they mock them constantly. I have always hated their attitudes and still do. I came home one day from seeing RENT the musical with my friends and I started talking about it to my mom and she (metaphorically) slapped me in the face with the comment, "I'm terrified that you're going to hell." That broke me right then and there and from then on, I decided to deny the fact that homosexuality was a sin. I had youtubers that I watched and connected with that were gay, I didn't want to hate them or hate what they are. No way. But despite all of that, I still wanted to find a belief in God. I cried out to Him, begging for a sign. Naturally, I wanted for Jesus to appear in my room or at least an angel in my dreams. This was longed for even more because my mother had claimed to dream about Satan and Jesus when she was 12 where Satan was this evil clown holding a needle(my mom's worst fears then) and when she resisted his temptation, she was inside an office building with clocks going off all around and she walked out and saw Jesus and he asked her if she accepted him and she said yes and everything was grand. I wanted that so badly, and not getting it made me become so upset. But then I started noticing something. I kept finding out that bands I listened to were Christian bands or had Christian members. And this was just random, out of the blue stuff. And then I found an article, or testimony, written by a previously super Atheist lesbian turned Christian heterosexual. That article completely washed away my denial and I realized that the only thing that truly matters anyways is sharing the gospel in LOVE. I realized that condemnation and arguments was never going to bring a nonbeliever into the light and from then on, I vowed to spread only love despite someone else's sins. And after that, I came across more and more Christian artists and even went to a free Moriah Peters concert that was in the area and I was on fire for the Lord. I connected to God through music and fell in love with Him by listening to His word spoken through another's mouth. I have yet to complete(or even really tear into) the Bible(I'm on Genesis chapter 37 or so?) and I haven't been able to go to church recently(I have no transportation there), but I'm working on serving the Lord as best I can. I am dealing with an unsightly and unfortunate addiction. My parents don't even know. Only my closest friends know about it and that confession has helped me deal with it a lot better recently. I wish to do better for my boyfriend, myself, and most importantly God. But I'm sure plenty of Christians deal with this kind of thing and it's not just guys either!) That's my story, and I hope this might enlighten or help any others struggling with doubt and addiction
Don't ever give up. God loves you more than you could ever ask, think or imagine. His unending love and grace is all you need. Just trust Him with His amazing plan. Tell your our story here email: [email protected] |
My Searching Heart - Kristy Jefferson My mother, younger sister and I moved back to Georgia where she married my violent alcoholic stepfather when I was three years old. If I ever left one dish or fork with a speck of anything on it while washing dishes my stepfather would make me rewash every dish. I usually always did as I was told and to perfection because I knew of the beating I would get. Not a spanking...a beating. They had three children together after I was ten years old and since I was the oldest I was expected to take care of them and to keep the house clean at all times. Cinderella should have been my nickname. I will never forget the night that my stepfather came home drinking and beat my mother in the stomach. He slammed me against the wall when I tried to make him stop and he left. My baby brother was born in the hospital the next day two months prematurely. My stepfather never showed up until days later. Everywhere we went my stepfather would always say to people, “Oh, she’s not my real kid.” I’m sure it was quite apparent to everyone that I wasn’t his biological daughter since I had blonde hair and blue eyes and his was dark and since his grandmother was full blooded Apache Indian. What did real mean anyway? I was told at a very young age that my father had died so why couldn’t he just say that I was his daughter? Throughout my childhood I came to realize the depths of the hate that my mother and stepfather had for my father. I always looked like my dad…you know how you can pick parent and child out in a crowded room…that was us. Many times in anger my mother let me know how looking at me was like looking at him. When I was 13 years old, my grandmother and my stepfather had a falling out and she decided to tell me that my father had never died and that he was probably still in prison somewhere, but she had no idea where. I was confused and I didn’t know what was true anymore, but I did have a glimmer of hope that I would one day see my father. I felt betrayed at being lied to all of my life and to top it off now they all said that they would never let me see him or help me find him. I was devastated. Not out of rebellion, but out of my search for love and acceptance I turned to drugs, my new boyfriend, and running away from home. The first time I ran away was to East Atlanta with a friend for one week. I followed her lead. Several times within a few months I would stay out all night or run away for a few days. Almost overnight I went from a straight A honor student to a juvenile delinquent. The last time, at 14 I ran away with my boyfriend… after six weeks we were found near Daytona Beach where I was taken to the Orange County Detention Center and he went home to his parents. I was no stranger to juvenile as I had already been in and out several times for running away. Only two days after returning home this time, my stepfather told my mother that he couldn’t stand to look at me any longer and it would either be me or him, she had to choose. She chose him. Before she got home from work the next day he had already knocked me across my room and told her when she came home that she was going to have to get rid of me right away. I was crying uncontrollably by this time and my stepfather was screaming that I must be on drugs. The police took me back to juvenile where I was sent to a foster home which I also ran away from. This time when I went to court, the Juvenile Judge ordered that I be sent to Macon Y.D.C. until I was an adult since I wasn’t allowed back home. Macon Y.D.C. wasn’t like regular juvenile .. it was a step down from women’s prison .. where the real problem teens were sent. One girl was there for murder because she was too young for prison…I was in another violent place. I was attacked twice while there and I had no choice but to fight back. I always kept quiet though and always tried to avoid trouble. My mother never came to visit even though she was allowed…no one ever did. We had one hour group sessions every day, but I would never open up. I never revealed my biggest secret of all about my uncle molesting and raping me from four to eight years old while baby-sitting me and my younger sister. My mother and grandmother had told me to forget about it and to never ever tell anyone, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t forget. I now wish that I had told someone. As I cried myself to sleep almost every night I felt abandoned, rejected and so alone. One day I was called to the Chaplain’s office and told that I would be going to my grandmother’s on a three day pass for my 13 month old baby sister’s funeral. Somehow she had been playing with an open bottle of Aquatabs and ingested them. I say she died from neglect. I felt extreme guilt for not being there to take care of her… my world grew darker with each passing day. Two months later because of good behavior I was allowed to go to my grandmother’s for a two week trial pass. I had heard from some of the girls in Y.D.C. say that if you were married that you would legally become an adult and be able to get out. When I arrived at my grandmother’s I called my boyfriend and told him what I had heard. He said that he was seeing another girl and that he wanted to break up. My heart was completely broken. I vaguely remember taking my grandfather’s newly filled prescription of over 100 small tranquilizers. God was truly watching over me as my grandfather came home early from work that day and saw me walking down Hwy. 85. I didn’t have a plan except to go into the woods and fall asleep. My grandfather and I went back to the house and he grabbed the empty bottle and we went to the nearest hospital 45 minutes away in Warm Springs. The doctors said that if we had been 15 minutes later I would have been dead. After I woke up from a four day coma my grandmother was irate because my mother hadn’t been there. She said that the nurses were saying that this was the worst case of neglect they had ever seen. After this close call with death, my boyfriend had a total change of heart and we were married three days after I was released from the hospital. I was 15 and he was 17 so my grandmother talked my mother into signing for me to be married and his father signed for him. I had to return to Y.D.C. for a psychological evaluation since I had tried to commit suicide. The psychologist said that my only problem was my family and I was released to live my life as I chose. After we had been together for one year I left him for beating me up and ended up in Florida for two years. I lived only to party and because of my state of mind on drugs and alcohol I often found myself in very dangerous situations. Once I injured my neck by falling out of a speeding car and another time I was raped at gunpoint. There was a witness to the rape that went at 3:00 a.m. down an abandoned dirt road to find a phone to call the police. God spared my life and the rapist was arrested… God in His mercy was watching over me once again. I was with several guys and found myself pregnant. I returned to Georgia to my grandmother’s where she sent me to a home for unwed mothers. The day my son was born was the major turning point in my life. I had always said my prayers every night since I was six years old and I now prayed every night for a father for my son. God answered and brought an awesome man into my life. His name is Jared and he's a youth pastor. We got engaged on October 3, 2015. He's crazy about both me and my little one. I still remember the prayer from a Christian prayer counselor as she prayed that I wouldn’t only find my earthly father, but that I would also find my Heavenly Father. My father was located only two months after her prayer. Even though I was so happy to find my father, it didn’t make my life complete the way I thought it would. Something was still missing. Throughout my lifetime I have been through all kinds of secular therapy, counseling and on medication never finding real relief until through a series of events I was led to church and rededicated my life. I was full of bitterness and deep resentment toward all of the people that had hurt me and it had affected every area of my life. Only after I surrendered my life to God did a real change occur in me. Although I don’t see most of my family and I believe that all abusers should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law; I chose to forgive them long ago. I found true healing through letting go and forgiving everyone who had ever hurt me. For such a long time I didn’t feel like I had really forgiven them so I prayed that God would let me truly feel the forgiveness...eventually I did. One day my uncle called me crying and said that he was so sorry for what he had done to me when I was a little girl. As I told him that I had already forgiven him years before; I really meant it and I really felt it. Only God can change hearts this way...I’m living proof. I am now the Founder of Faith Travels, a testimony ministry and I know that our past does not have to determine our future. My greatest desire in life is to let others know that they can rise above any situation and that there is only true hope, true healing and true forgiveness through Jesus Christ. I now know that the most important thing in life for anyone is to find their Heavenly Father and to read His words written in red. My search is over…my Heavenly Father was what I was searching for all along. Guys, I hope my testimony encourages you. What God did in my life, He can do in yours. Kristy :) |
How God Changed a “Good Deeds Only” Christian
September 8, 2015 Ever since I was small, I loved God and Jesus, I always wanted to please them. I was raised in a Pentecostal Christian family. I liked going to church, I loved offering tithe, and I was around 4 or 5 years old by this time. I was very inspired about Jesus, however I didn’t personally know him, and I only knew him in the Bible. Around ages of 8-9 and 10, I started reading the Bible. I read a few stories of David, Samuel, Samson, Moses, Joshua and the three patriarchs (Abraham, Isaac, Jacob). When I read further in Deuteronomy, I saw the 10commandments, they said do not lie yet I lied several times, do not steal yet i once stole a pencil in my school, too many do nots I was frustrated. I kept asking God and crying to him how I can keep His Law perfectly. Every time I failed. I thought that God would hate me if I didn’t do enough good deeds, perhaps my salvation depended on good deeds. I was imperfect like any human being and still am. I was angry at God, I kept telling him: “Don’t you see? Every law of yours I can’t keep perfectly! How much good should I do to earn your love!? Just kill me! All Christians probably can keep your laws perfectly than me” By this time I was much disappointed. I kept asking myself “How good is good enough to earn God’s forgiveness?” But after several months, the Holy Spirit told me to read the Gospels. I started reading by order, starting in Matthew all the way to John (it took me another several months to finish). After some quiet self-reflection, by the ages of 12 or 13, I understood it’s not my good deeds that reassure me my forgiveness but rather by Christ’s sacrifice alone. This is how I personally knew Christ. I love him more now than in the past. Sunday school always taught about faith alone, but since I was young I didn’t understand what was being said to me. I thank God he has let me truly know Christ through my guilt of sin/admitting imperfection, reading the Gospels to understand that he died for me, and accept him as My Lord & Saviour. My forgiveness is through faith in Christ’s sacrifice alone. Good deeds are nothing but filthy rugs that shrivel up and swept a way by our sins just like how prophet Isaiah used to say (Isaiah 64:6). God has always loved me, he never hated me for imperfection, and he wanted me to see my “good deeds only” theory is wrong, only faith alone is where my salvation stands. I am justified by faith in Christ, not by the Law. God has done so much for me. I praise Him. He has helped in tough times, he is my Hope, my King, and my Messiah. Holy, Holy, Holy is His Name. - Calvin SAVED FROM SUICIDE
(The Kim Avery Story) Jesus Did It! When I was 15 years old I became very depressed and unhappy with my life. My parents had divorced when I was 12 and my mom had gotten remarried to a man that had 3 children which lived with us. The marriage only lasted a year and they got a divorce. After this it was just my mom, me and my sister. My mom had started dating and went out on the weekends. I would usually go out with my friends. I really didn't have a reason to commit suicide now that I think back on what led me to make that decision. I wasn't as popular as I wanted to be and my best friend was becoming popular and getting all the attention from the guys. She had a boyfriend and I didn't. I had started smoking and drinking. This made me more depressed. On the day I decided to commit suicide, I had been out with my friend. I had a terrible time and started thinking about suicide. We had met these two guys that we knew while we were out and they said they would take us home. We had all been drinking that night but I didn't know the guy that was driving was as drunk as he was. On the way home, I was thinking about how I would commit suicide once I got home. My mom had always had problems with her kidneys and she had all kinds of prescription medicine in the cabinet. I decided I would take all the pills in the cabinet. Everything that was in the cabinet I would put on the kitchen table and sit down and start taking pills until I passed out. By the time it was morning and my mom got up, I would be dead. We were just a few miles from home when the driver ran off the road. It had started raining and I guess he must have been driving faster than I realized. The last words I remember being spoken were his friend saying, "Hey man, Get back on the road." The driver must have jerked the truck back on the road because the next thing I remember we were flying through the air. The truck had hit a row of poles that someone had put up in their yard. The poles were just a few feet high and this caused the truck to go up in the air and flip over. I remember my friend grabbing hold of the steering wheel and saying "Oh my God." I thought to myself maybe I will die in this wreck and then I won't have to go home and take all those pills. This would be easier. It seemed like everything happened in slow motion. I put my hands together and bowed my head and said "Please God don't let this hurt." The next thing I remember was waking up thinking I was at home in my bed and I was waking up from a dream. I suddenly began to remember what had happened. I had been in a wreck. Everything was pitch black dark and I couldn't see. I tried to move but I couldn't. I felt a horrifying fear come over me. I must be dead. I tried harder to get out of the darkness but I couldn't and I became more and more afraid. Words cannot begin to describe how terrified I was when I realized I must be dead. I had wanted to die and now I had my wish. I didn't want to be dead if this was what it was like. I couldn't see or move; I was just lying there in total darkness with overwhelming fear and loneliness. I began to call out to God. "Please God don't let me be dead. I promise to stop smoking and drinking and I will quit thinking about committing suicide." As I prayed to God, he quickly came and brought me out of the darkness. I began to crawl out from underneath the truck and I saw my friends standing there. We had landed upside down in front of someone's house. They called the ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. It was a miracle that I wasn't dead. My head was split wide open to the bone and I had broken my back. I was lucky to be alive. Statistics say that someone thinking about committing suicide will usually not tell anyone. This is why when they do commit suicide, everyone is so shocked. They didn't know that the person was so depressed. When I decided to commit suicide, I didn't tell anyone, not even my best friend. The only one that knew my thoughts and what I was planning to do was God. If I hadn't got into that wreck, I would have committed suicide and probably would have died but God didn't let me. He saved me but when I was lying there in that terrifying darkness, I think he was showing me of what it would be like if I had committed suicide. I would have went to hell. I don't know till this day where I was at, maybe it was the gates of hell and that is why I felt so horrified. All I know is I never want to go back there again! I urge anyone thinking of suicide to seek help. Trust me you do not want to experience what I did. I am just so thankful that God saved me and didn't let me die. I am grown now and I have two kids and a wonderful husband. My life has been full of trials but God has always been there for me even when I didn't know it. Kim Avery |
June 21, 2015
May 24, 2015
Armor of God part 2
It’s been a long time since anything has been submitted, so let’s just dive in.
Helmet of Salvation:
Let’s face it, if you do not have a helmet in battle then you are a dead man walking.
Salvation: Deliverance from sin and its consequences.
The deadliest blow from any enemy is at your head, in the end times Jesus told us one of the battles we will have to face is the battle of the mind. Nowadays the line between Good and Evil has been blurred to confuse us and make us believe that darkness is the light. Confusion and uncontrollable thoughts will infiltrate your mind and make you feel like you are not a good Christian.
You will have to put that helmet on and realize what side you are fighting for. Don’t let sin drive you insane. The wages of sin is death, the helmet saves you from death just like Jesus saves us from sin.
Sword of the Spirit.
In order for a soldier to be successful in war, they will need a weapon to fight back. It also says in Ephesians 6:18 that we should also pray to be successful, and what is the most powerful thing a Christian can do? PRAY! God is simply a genius because the sword is the most powerful weapon you can use to vanquish the enemy. I’ve been told that the sword of the spirit is the Bible, and maybe they are right. Maybe it is something else as well… God has told us to preach the gospel, and spread the good news of Christ.
What is the Sword is the words we speak as well.
Proverbs 12:18:
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Think of it like this, replace a heated conversation with a sword fight, what would you see? If you see every word slashed upon someone’s body, you would think twice about what you say to others. The truth is, we do not see that so it is easier to hurt someone. Words are why we have bullies, haters and just plain rude people. That is the problem with a weapon as refined as a sword as well, we can use it for good or for evil.
I will never forget, in third grade a girl moved to my town and went to my school. She was from India and I befriended her but one day in Art class, the kids at my table were making fun of her and instead of standing up for her, I joined in. We made her cry all over her art project making the colors run on the paper.
If I had a time machine, I would love to go back to that time and redo it and be the good friend I knew I could have been for her. After third grade, we grew apart just like all kids do sometimes in school and now, I don’t know where she is.
Colossians 3:8
But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these, anger, malice, wrath, rage, slander and filthy language from your lips.
That is why God wants us to watch what we say to others, because he doesn’t want us to have times in our lives where we regret the things we have said to each other. I could go on and on about this subject but the bottom line is to USE YOUR WEAPON WISELY. There are going to be days where you aren’t going to care what comes out of your mouth because you are angry or hurt yourself. Remember that there is always someone around you hurting worse than you are and the words you say to them just might make their day worse.
Ephesians 6:19
And also for me, that words be given to me in opening my mouth and boldly proclaim the mystery of the gospel.
Tie everything together with a battle cry and you have a one strong soldier.
Truth: Holds everything together.
Righteousness: defines your status to frighten the enemy.
Peace: keeps a soldier focused on the war ahead of him
Faith: is your protection to assure your safety
Salvation: Reminds you what you are fighting for.
Spirit: is the weapon meant to kill all evil blows.
Have a wonderful Memorial Day everyone and God Bless You!
Armor of God part 2
It’s been a long time since anything has been submitted, so let’s just dive in.
Helmet of Salvation:
Let’s face it, if you do not have a helmet in battle then you are a dead man walking.
Salvation: Deliverance from sin and its consequences.
The deadliest blow from any enemy is at your head, in the end times Jesus told us one of the battles we will have to face is the battle of the mind. Nowadays the line between Good and Evil has been blurred to confuse us and make us believe that darkness is the light. Confusion and uncontrollable thoughts will infiltrate your mind and make you feel like you are not a good Christian.
You will have to put that helmet on and realize what side you are fighting for. Don’t let sin drive you insane. The wages of sin is death, the helmet saves you from death just like Jesus saves us from sin.
Sword of the Spirit.
In order for a soldier to be successful in war, they will need a weapon to fight back. It also says in Ephesians 6:18 that we should also pray to be successful, and what is the most powerful thing a Christian can do? PRAY! God is simply a genius because the sword is the most powerful weapon you can use to vanquish the enemy. I’ve been told that the sword of the spirit is the Bible, and maybe they are right. Maybe it is something else as well… God has told us to preach the gospel, and spread the good news of Christ.
What is the Sword is the words we speak as well.
Proverbs 12:18:
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Think of it like this, replace a heated conversation with a sword fight, what would you see? If you see every word slashed upon someone’s body, you would think twice about what you say to others. The truth is, we do not see that so it is easier to hurt someone. Words are why we have bullies, haters and just plain rude people. That is the problem with a weapon as refined as a sword as well, we can use it for good or for evil.
I will never forget, in third grade a girl moved to my town and went to my school. She was from India and I befriended her but one day in Art class, the kids at my table were making fun of her and instead of standing up for her, I joined in. We made her cry all over her art project making the colors run on the paper.
If I had a time machine, I would love to go back to that time and redo it and be the good friend I knew I could have been for her. After third grade, we grew apart just like all kids do sometimes in school and now, I don’t know where she is.
Colossians 3:8
But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these, anger, malice, wrath, rage, slander and filthy language from your lips.
That is why God wants us to watch what we say to others, because he doesn’t want us to have times in our lives where we regret the things we have said to each other. I could go on and on about this subject but the bottom line is to USE YOUR WEAPON WISELY. There are going to be days where you aren’t going to care what comes out of your mouth because you are angry or hurt yourself. Remember that there is always someone around you hurting worse than you are and the words you say to them just might make their day worse.
Ephesians 6:19
And also for me, that words be given to me in opening my mouth and boldly proclaim the mystery of the gospel.
Tie everything together with a battle cry and you have a one strong soldier.
Truth: Holds everything together.
Righteousness: defines your status to frighten the enemy.
Peace: keeps a soldier focused on the war ahead of him
Faith: is your protection to assure your safety
Salvation: Reminds you what you are fighting for.
Spirit: is the weapon meant to kill all evil blows.
Have a wonderful Memorial Day everyone and God Bless You!
From Amanda,
I tried my hardest to live out what I believed. I had a quiet time every morning. I prayed often. I memorized Scripture. I led a small Bible study group. And I never missed Sunday school or church. But it never seemed like I was doing enough, and I kicked myself for it.
What would it take to please God? What else did I need to do?
One day I asked my pastor these questions, and he had some encouraging words:
"If you're a Christian, God is pleased with you," he said. "It sounds like you're looking at your relationship with God as a to-do list. That's what's stealing your joy."
He pulled out his Bible and turned to Galatians. He told me how the people in the Galatian church felt a lot like me.
"Some people convinced the Galatians they had to keep a list of rules, too. So Paul wrote them a letter to remind them that God accepted them by grace, not because of anything they did.
"Now, don't quit having your quiet time or leading your Bible study. Those things are evidence of a changed heart. But you mustn't think that God's approval rests on how well and how often you do them."
That conversation marked the beginning of my journey toward freedom. I continued studying Galatians, which became a rediscovery of the gospel of grace. Growing up in the church, I had heard the message so many times—that God sent his Son to die for my sins—that eventually I began to tune it out. Yeah, I understand all that. Now let's move on to something else, I would think. But evidently I didn't understand it, because I began to believe that God's acceptance of me was based on my ability to do the right things.
I thought if I studied my Bible and prayed, God would be more pleased with me and more likely to use me than on a day when I overslept and missed my quiet time. But as the gospel became more clear to me, I began to see that even on my best day, when I seem to be doing everything right, I'm still a sinner. I never keep God's commands perfectly. That's why I needed God's grace in the first place.
I think what I lacked in the first few years of my Christian life was the understanding that God is infinitely pleased with me, not because of what I do but because of who I am—his child. Through his grace, I am "hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3). That means when God looks at me, he doesn't see my sin, he sees the perfection of his Son.
This truth finally clicked when I heard a pastor tell a story about his daughter, Robin. During high school she was enrolled in an honors English class. The first day of class the teacher talked about her expectations and handed out an overview of what they'd be studying.
Robin was completely overwhelmed. She came home and told her father he had to go talk with the teacher to get her out of the class. He agreed to set up a conference during which he and the teacher struck an agreement. The teacher wanted Robin to remain in the class, so she offered to give her an "A" from the very beginning, with the understanding that Robin still do the work and participate in class discussion. Robin agreed to the arrangement. And do you know what the teacher found? Robin turned in "A" work anyway. The teacher removed the threat of failure, and in its absence, Robin excelled.
After hearing that story, I realized that my feelings of desperation were the result of my fear of failure. Like Robin with her English class, I panicked when I thought of all the work the Christian life seemed to demand. How could I ever make a passing grade? Thankfully, just like Robin's teacher, God went ahead and gave me an "A." Knowing that, I'm finding a freedom I didn't know before. Understanding that I don't have to work for God's approval hasn't made me stop reading my Bible or memorizing Scripture. It's actually given me a passion for it. I'm also finding that the more I learn about his love for me, the more motivated I am to love others.
I still have days when I feel like I'm just trying to keep a list, when I look at the things I haven't done well and begin to drown myself in guilt. Or when, on the other hand, I look at what I have done well and begin to think I've got myself together.
When I hit these extremes, I realize I've forgotten the gospel again. I have to remind myself that my relationship with God is not based on my performance. I am what I am (a new creation) not be cause of anything I've done, but because of what God has done for me. He removed the threat of failure. Now I can relax and enjoy getting to know him.
Some of the ideas for "What's It Take to Please God?" were taken from Jerry Bridges' book The Discipline of Grace (NavPress). In his insightful book, Bridges points out that our "worst days are never so bad that we are beyond the reach of God's grace. And [our] best days are never so good that we are beyond the need of God's grace."
I tried my hardest to live out what I believed. I had a quiet time every morning. I prayed often. I memorized Scripture. I led a small Bible study group. And I never missed Sunday school or church. But it never seemed like I was doing enough, and I kicked myself for it.
What would it take to please God? What else did I need to do?
One day I asked my pastor these questions, and he had some encouraging words:
"If you're a Christian, God is pleased with you," he said. "It sounds like you're looking at your relationship with God as a to-do list. That's what's stealing your joy."
He pulled out his Bible and turned to Galatians. He told me how the people in the Galatian church felt a lot like me.
"Some people convinced the Galatians they had to keep a list of rules, too. So Paul wrote them a letter to remind them that God accepted them by grace, not because of anything they did.
"Now, don't quit having your quiet time or leading your Bible study. Those things are evidence of a changed heart. But you mustn't think that God's approval rests on how well and how often you do them."
That conversation marked the beginning of my journey toward freedom. I continued studying Galatians, which became a rediscovery of the gospel of grace. Growing up in the church, I had heard the message so many times—that God sent his Son to die for my sins—that eventually I began to tune it out. Yeah, I understand all that. Now let's move on to something else, I would think. But evidently I didn't understand it, because I began to believe that God's acceptance of me was based on my ability to do the right things.
I thought if I studied my Bible and prayed, God would be more pleased with me and more likely to use me than on a day when I overslept and missed my quiet time. But as the gospel became more clear to me, I began to see that even on my best day, when I seem to be doing everything right, I'm still a sinner. I never keep God's commands perfectly. That's why I needed God's grace in the first place.
I think what I lacked in the first few years of my Christian life was the understanding that God is infinitely pleased with me, not because of what I do but because of who I am—his child. Through his grace, I am "hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3). That means when God looks at me, he doesn't see my sin, he sees the perfection of his Son.
This truth finally clicked when I heard a pastor tell a story about his daughter, Robin. During high school she was enrolled in an honors English class. The first day of class the teacher talked about her expectations and handed out an overview of what they'd be studying.
Robin was completely overwhelmed. She came home and told her father he had to go talk with the teacher to get her out of the class. He agreed to set up a conference during which he and the teacher struck an agreement. The teacher wanted Robin to remain in the class, so she offered to give her an "A" from the very beginning, with the understanding that Robin still do the work and participate in class discussion. Robin agreed to the arrangement. And do you know what the teacher found? Robin turned in "A" work anyway. The teacher removed the threat of failure, and in its absence, Robin excelled.
After hearing that story, I realized that my feelings of desperation were the result of my fear of failure. Like Robin with her English class, I panicked when I thought of all the work the Christian life seemed to demand. How could I ever make a passing grade? Thankfully, just like Robin's teacher, God went ahead and gave me an "A." Knowing that, I'm finding a freedom I didn't know before. Understanding that I don't have to work for God's approval hasn't made me stop reading my Bible or memorizing Scripture. It's actually given me a passion for it. I'm also finding that the more I learn about his love for me, the more motivated I am to love others.
I still have days when I feel like I'm just trying to keep a list, when I look at the things I haven't done well and begin to drown myself in guilt. Or when, on the other hand, I look at what I have done well and begin to think I've got myself together.
When I hit these extremes, I realize I've forgotten the gospel again. I have to remind myself that my relationship with God is not based on my performance. I am what I am (a new creation) not be cause of anything I've done, but because of what God has done for me. He removed the threat of failure. Now I can relax and enjoy getting to know him.
Some of the ideas for "What's It Take to Please God?" were taken from Jerry Bridges' book The Discipline of Grace (NavPress). In his insightful book, Bridges points out that our "worst days are never so bad that we are beyond the reach of God's grace. And [our] best days are never so good that we are beyond the need of God's grace."
Testimony of a life healed !
When I started high school, I couldn't tell you why I had been through the things I had. Partly because I shut everything out and I couldn't remember, but also cause I didn't care. It didn't matter to me that I had been taken away from my mom and dad. It didn't matter that I now was living with grandparents who I felt expected me to be perfect. It didn't matter that I was cussing, hating people, dating guys who just wanted to sleep with me. It didn't matter that I was pretending to be a Christian.
Okay, maybe I'm going too fast. Let's rewind a second; I was born in early June of 1997. Completely normal, a healthy baby. I had a mom who was trying to start her life pretty early (she was 21) and a dad who had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Needless to say, things were pretty good; dad was musically talented and could play almost any instrument you put in front of him and even played for the church we went to, mom had a good job.
All was right with the world. And then my sister was born. I'm not sure if she was planned or not; I've never really asked. I do remember everyone thought she was going to be a boy until about two weeks before she was due. Cool surprise, huh? The doctors were baffled that my mom could produce kids only 13 months apart. That was almost unheard of.
So in comes my sister to this big, happy family. And that's where things started to snowball. My sister was born a healthy, happy, normal baby. But after 2 months, my mom noticed something wasn't right. My sister had stopped smiling, laughing, even crying. After a few trips to the doctor, it was determined that my sister had autism; someone had given her the wrong shot one day. Distraught, my mom tried everything she could to get her baby back to normal, but with no success. She eventually gave up. But that wasn't the only thing going on in the midst of this chaos. My dad was in a band with a few of his friends, had cut a few albums, and was enjoying feeling like a rock star.
Some rock stars turn out to be pretty good and don't let the fame get to their head; not in this case. First my dad started drinking. Then it was pot. Then he started hitting my mom. Most of the time it was because mom couldn't bring home enough money to supply his habit. Sometimes it was just because he could yell at her. He threatened to leave and take my sister, and I remember wondering why he never wanted to take me with him. I remember hearing them fight back and forth in the kitchen and in the bedroom. A few angry words, then a slap. More angry words, then another slap. It was awful.
Eventually I got used to it, though. If I heard a night where they weren't fighting, I figured something was wrong. At least, until he started hitting and touching me. I won't really get into the sexual abuse part, simply because it's so gruesome. It's something I still have trouble discussing to this day. So I'll continue on with the other parts. At first he would say it was because I was misbehaving. Which I did regularly, simply because I was never taught any better. But then, it escalated. The hitting became punching. One time it was so bad I remember blood running down my leg just as my mom walked in from work. He had done other physical things, too, but that was the first time she knew about it. (She never found out about the sexual abuse until later.)
After that, the fights got worse and more frequent. My mom found out that dad was cheating on her. He filed for divorce soon after, to be with the other woman. He never showed up to court, though, until the day they threatened to arrest him for contempt of court.
I remember sitting in the back of the courtroom when he walked in. I was so excited to see him (I didn't understand what was going on) but he never gave me a second glance. He walked straight up to the judge and said something to him. I found out later that he told the judge he didn't want me or my sister. He said he had his own future and we weren't a part of that.
I remember looking at my mom as tears welled up in her eyes. That was the end of it. You would think now things would get better. But as I said before, things kept snowballing. My mom loved my dad very much, and went into a severe depression soon after the divorce battle was over. We lost everything; our house, our car, my mom lost her job, and me and my sister stopped going to school. The bank repossessed our house and we were forced to move on the outskirts of town in a little trailer with what little we had left.
Now, most kids my age (I was about 5 at the time) are usually worrying about playing with Barbies. Not where their next meal was coming from. Most kids are worrying about getting that toy at the store they begged their parents for. Not being able to take a bath or give their sister one. Most kids are worrying about having tea parties with their stuffed animals. Not if they were going to find a blanket to sleep on. I had to worry about all those things. I had to teach myself how to take care of myself. My mom slept all day or was on a computer, stealing the neighbor's Wi-Fi. I wasn't even able to sleep in a bed; my sister slept with my mom and there was only one bed. I had no one to comfort me through the nightmares I had or buy me new clothes or even make supper for me. I was just... Alone.
This went on for about a year or so. And then, suddenly, by the grace of God, someone found us. Someone came and took me, my mom, and my sister into town to DSS (Department of Social Services). They deemed my mom unfit to care for me or my sister and were about to put us in foster care. But my mom begged them to take us to her parents. My grandparents, thankful we were still alive, swooped in that same hour and carried us off.
Awesome story of redemption, right? But it doesn't end there. Just bear with me. So I finished my childhood very happy. I remember one of the first things I got a few months after we were sent to live with my grandparents was my own bed. My own bed! As if that wasn't enough, I got new toys, new clothes, and three square meals a day. Everything was perfect and I was doing great in school. But there were some bumps in the road. I was bullied a lot in school. Because I didn't have proper medical care when I was younger, I was obese. People called me names and I often didn't have a lot of friends. The teachers were persistent about getting them to stop, but they just didn't seem to make a difference.
Eventually, time went on and the bullying subsided as I got into middle school and began to become healthier. I had kind of known who God was when I was little. I went to church, played in the children's group. I had heard of people praying and asking God to heal them. But my view of God was rather... Distorted. I went to a Pentecostal church when I was with my mom and dad before the fights started. I was afraid of God because of the way they spoke in tongues and my pastor yelled constantly. My grandparents didn't go to church, so after I started living with them I really didn't hear much about God.
But then in sixth grade, I met a girl named Kellie. She had grown up in church her whole life, and we became friends a few months into the school year. She was always talking about her faith when she wasn't joking around and because I was eager for her to accept me, I became interested in religious views. She explained to me about how this man named Jesus died to give me eternal life and to pay for all the sins I did. I thought it was rather amazing - I had never heard anything like that. So one day, in the bathroom by myself, I asked Jesus into my heart. I told Kellie what I did after it had happened, and she was thrilled. Unfortunately, I wasn't changed by it. I went through the rest of middle school, hardly ever giving a thought to God because me and Kellie started having problems.
It wasn't until my father (adopted father) had a heart attack and almost died twice that I really believed there was a God. I remember telling Him that if He was really there, he wouldn't let him die. Sure enough, the doctors became baffled that he made it and said if he had been a few minutes later, there would have been nothing they could've done. He made a rather speedy recovery and was out of the hospital and back home within 3 days (and this happened during Easter - CRAZY.)
Regardless of how persistent God was to get my attention, I didn't listen until my sophomore year of high school. I made a friend who was a year older than me and started asking me to come to church with her. I came along, just to see what it was all about, and finally started listening to God. Soon after, I gave my life to the Lord and was baptized on February 10th, 2013. I was completely sold out to the Lord and have been ever since. So back to what I said in the beginning, it never mattered to me what I had been through, until the day God healed me. I had suppressed everything until earlier this school year when the memories started coming back. I suffer from flashbacks of what happened with my dad in the past, but God is pulling me through them one day at a time. I can now talk about my story with a smile, because I know what the Lord did for me. I should have died. I should not be here right now. I shouldn't be even mentally stable. But I am, all because God has healed me. Looking back, I realized He was there all along; through all of the abuse, the day that I was taken away from my mom, the day Kellie first explained Him to me, and most of all, the day I told Him I wanted to dedicate the rest of my life to Him. So whatever you're going through, wherever you've been, you are loved and can be comforted by an awesome God. He wants you and all of your brokenness.
Don't let things of the world or Satan and his mischief get you down. Read your Bible. Pray. Believe that God is stronger than anything you may face, because He is. By His wounds, we are HEALED!!!!!
When I started high school, I couldn't tell you why I had been through the things I had. Partly because I shut everything out and I couldn't remember, but also cause I didn't care. It didn't matter to me that I had been taken away from my mom and dad. It didn't matter that I now was living with grandparents who I felt expected me to be perfect. It didn't matter that I was cussing, hating people, dating guys who just wanted to sleep with me. It didn't matter that I was pretending to be a Christian.
Okay, maybe I'm going too fast. Let's rewind a second; I was born in early June of 1997. Completely normal, a healthy baby. I had a mom who was trying to start her life pretty early (she was 21) and a dad who had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Needless to say, things were pretty good; dad was musically talented and could play almost any instrument you put in front of him and even played for the church we went to, mom had a good job.
All was right with the world. And then my sister was born. I'm not sure if she was planned or not; I've never really asked. I do remember everyone thought she was going to be a boy until about two weeks before she was due. Cool surprise, huh? The doctors were baffled that my mom could produce kids only 13 months apart. That was almost unheard of.
So in comes my sister to this big, happy family. And that's where things started to snowball. My sister was born a healthy, happy, normal baby. But after 2 months, my mom noticed something wasn't right. My sister had stopped smiling, laughing, even crying. After a few trips to the doctor, it was determined that my sister had autism; someone had given her the wrong shot one day. Distraught, my mom tried everything she could to get her baby back to normal, but with no success. She eventually gave up. But that wasn't the only thing going on in the midst of this chaos. My dad was in a band with a few of his friends, had cut a few albums, and was enjoying feeling like a rock star.
Some rock stars turn out to be pretty good and don't let the fame get to their head; not in this case. First my dad started drinking. Then it was pot. Then he started hitting my mom. Most of the time it was because mom couldn't bring home enough money to supply his habit. Sometimes it was just because he could yell at her. He threatened to leave and take my sister, and I remember wondering why he never wanted to take me with him. I remember hearing them fight back and forth in the kitchen and in the bedroom. A few angry words, then a slap. More angry words, then another slap. It was awful.
Eventually I got used to it, though. If I heard a night where they weren't fighting, I figured something was wrong. At least, until he started hitting and touching me. I won't really get into the sexual abuse part, simply because it's so gruesome. It's something I still have trouble discussing to this day. So I'll continue on with the other parts. At first he would say it was because I was misbehaving. Which I did regularly, simply because I was never taught any better. But then, it escalated. The hitting became punching. One time it was so bad I remember blood running down my leg just as my mom walked in from work. He had done other physical things, too, but that was the first time she knew about it. (She never found out about the sexual abuse until later.)
After that, the fights got worse and more frequent. My mom found out that dad was cheating on her. He filed for divorce soon after, to be with the other woman. He never showed up to court, though, until the day they threatened to arrest him for contempt of court.
I remember sitting in the back of the courtroom when he walked in. I was so excited to see him (I didn't understand what was going on) but he never gave me a second glance. He walked straight up to the judge and said something to him. I found out later that he told the judge he didn't want me or my sister. He said he had his own future and we weren't a part of that.
I remember looking at my mom as tears welled up in her eyes. That was the end of it. You would think now things would get better. But as I said before, things kept snowballing. My mom loved my dad very much, and went into a severe depression soon after the divorce battle was over. We lost everything; our house, our car, my mom lost her job, and me and my sister stopped going to school. The bank repossessed our house and we were forced to move on the outskirts of town in a little trailer with what little we had left.
Now, most kids my age (I was about 5 at the time) are usually worrying about playing with Barbies. Not where their next meal was coming from. Most kids are worrying about getting that toy at the store they begged their parents for. Not being able to take a bath or give their sister one. Most kids are worrying about having tea parties with their stuffed animals. Not if they were going to find a blanket to sleep on. I had to worry about all those things. I had to teach myself how to take care of myself. My mom slept all day or was on a computer, stealing the neighbor's Wi-Fi. I wasn't even able to sleep in a bed; my sister slept with my mom and there was only one bed. I had no one to comfort me through the nightmares I had or buy me new clothes or even make supper for me. I was just... Alone.
This went on for about a year or so. And then, suddenly, by the grace of God, someone found us. Someone came and took me, my mom, and my sister into town to DSS (Department of Social Services). They deemed my mom unfit to care for me or my sister and were about to put us in foster care. But my mom begged them to take us to her parents. My grandparents, thankful we were still alive, swooped in that same hour and carried us off.
Awesome story of redemption, right? But it doesn't end there. Just bear with me. So I finished my childhood very happy. I remember one of the first things I got a few months after we were sent to live with my grandparents was my own bed. My own bed! As if that wasn't enough, I got new toys, new clothes, and three square meals a day. Everything was perfect and I was doing great in school. But there were some bumps in the road. I was bullied a lot in school. Because I didn't have proper medical care when I was younger, I was obese. People called me names and I often didn't have a lot of friends. The teachers were persistent about getting them to stop, but they just didn't seem to make a difference.
Eventually, time went on and the bullying subsided as I got into middle school and began to become healthier. I had kind of known who God was when I was little. I went to church, played in the children's group. I had heard of people praying and asking God to heal them. But my view of God was rather... Distorted. I went to a Pentecostal church when I was with my mom and dad before the fights started. I was afraid of God because of the way they spoke in tongues and my pastor yelled constantly. My grandparents didn't go to church, so after I started living with them I really didn't hear much about God.
But then in sixth grade, I met a girl named Kellie. She had grown up in church her whole life, and we became friends a few months into the school year. She was always talking about her faith when she wasn't joking around and because I was eager for her to accept me, I became interested in religious views. She explained to me about how this man named Jesus died to give me eternal life and to pay for all the sins I did. I thought it was rather amazing - I had never heard anything like that. So one day, in the bathroom by myself, I asked Jesus into my heart. I told Kellie what I did after it had happened, and she was thrilled. Unfortunately, I wasn't changed by it. I went through the rest of middle school, hardly ever giving a thought to God because me and Kellie started having problems.
It wasn't until my father (adopted father) had a heart attack and almost died twice that I really believed there was a God. I remember telling Him that if He was really there, he wouldn't let him die. Sure enough, the doctors became baffled that he made it and said if he had been a few minutes later, there would have been nothing they could've done. He made a rather speedy recovery and was out of the hospital and back home within 3 days (and this happened during Easter - CRAZY.)
Regardless of how persistent God was to get my attention, I didn't listen until my sophomore year of high school. I made a friend who was a year older than me and started asking me to come to church with her. I came along, just to see what it was all about, and finally started listening to God. Soon after, I gave my life to the Lord and was baptized on February 10th, 2013. I was completely sold out to the Lord and have been ever since. So back to what I said in the beginning, it never mattered to me what I had been through, until the day God healed me. I had suppressed everything until earlier this school year when the memories started coming back. I suffer from flashbacks of what happened with my dad in the past, but God is pulling me through them one day at a time. I can now talk about my story with a smile, because I know what the Lord did for me. I should have died. I should not be here right now. I shouldn't be even mentally stable. But I am, all because God has healed me. Looking back, I realized He was there all along; through all of the abuse, the day that I was taken away from my mom, the day Kellie first explained Him to me, and most of all, the day I told Him I wanted to dedicate the rest of my life to Him. So whatever you're going through, wherever you've been, you are loved and can be comforted by an awesome God. He wants you and all of your brokenness.
Don't let things of the world or Satan and his mischief get you down. Read your Bible. Pray. Believe that God is stronger than anything you may face, because He is. By His wounds, we are HEALED!!!!!
Decisions
I have a choice to be different.
I don't need a perfect family or a perfect life to be called "accepted".
God takes me either way.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
I don't have to be like this world or its conniving and deceptive people.
God said He'd make me better than that.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
To pray until my voice is worn and my throat is sore, crying out to Jesus in joy, or in pain.
God hears me loud and clear.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
I can love extravagantly, lavishly, without fail, not just for my friends, but for those who persecute and hate me.
God smiles on me for obeying Him.
I have a choice.
You have a choice to be different.
You can let the world pick you up and throw you down, and lie to you, or you can give up your life to Jesus and have true happiness.
You have a choice.
So... What will you choose?
I have a choice to be different.
I don't need a perfect family or a perfect life to be called "accepted".
God takes me either way.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
I don't have to be like this world or its conniving and deceptive people.
God said He'd make me better than that.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
To pray until my voice is worn and my throat is sore, crying out to Jesus in joy, or in pain.
God hears me loud and clear.
I have a choice.
I have a choice to be different.
I can love extravagantly, lavishly, without fail, not just for my friends, but for those who persecute and hate me.
God smiles on me for obeying Him.
I have a choice.
You have a choice to be different.
You can let the world pick you up and throw you down, and lie to you, or you can give up your life to Jesus and have true happiness.
You have a choice.
So... What will you choose?
Inside My Heart
No one knows the depths of what my heart holds.
They think they do, but they don't.
You wouldn't understand it even if you did,
Inside my heart, it's just sort of cold.
It's cold because I keep getting hurt,
And the hurt comes from people who don't understand.
People ask, "Share with me,
What's inside your heart." But I can't.
God, I know you designed and created this heart
So why would you let it suffer this pain?
Not a memory, not a sigh, nor the tears in my eyes
Inside my heart, ever goes away
I want to believe and to trust in someone who is real
Someone who will listen instead of tearing my mind apart
Healing Hands, Keeper of the Stars....
Do you see what's inside my heart?
No one knows the depths of what my heart holds.
They think they do, but they don't.
You wouldn't understand it even if you did,
Inside my heart, it's just sort of cold.
It's cold because I keep getting hurt,
And the hurt comes from people who don't understand.
People ask, "Share with me,
What's inside your heart." But I can't.
God, I know you designed and created this heart
So why would you let it suffer this pain?
Not a memory, not a sigh, nor the tears in my eyes
Inside my heart, ever goes away
I want to believe and to trust in someone who is real
Someone who will listen instead of tearing my mind apart
Healing Hands, Keeper of the Stars....
Do you see what's inside my heart?
Kenzie’s Story
I'm not exactly sure when I realized my life was spinning out of control. Maybe it was that night in the police car. I'd just been caught shoplifting, and they were taking me down to the police station.
Maybe it was the night my parents found an empty wine bottle in my closet. They'd suspected I'd been drinking, but when they found that bottle, they knew it was serious.
Or maybe it was the day one of my friends caught me throwing up. No, I wasn't hung over. I was just obsessed with being thin; I wanted to look good for my friends, so I'd fallen into a cycle of binge-and-purge, eat-and-vomit.
It was disgusting. And I was disgusted with myself.
How had it come to this, anyway?
I'd grown up in a Christian family. I thought I had my act together … until I hit high school. That's when things started happening, things that led to some major changes in my life—and some bad decisions on my part.
First, we started building a new house, and the only time we could work on it was on weekends. We stopped going to church regularly. Eventually, we spent less and less time praying and reading the Bible.
Second, my best friend moved away the summer before I started ninth grade. I felt really lost and alone, so when school started that fall, I was desperate for some new friends. And it was that desperation, my intense desire to "fit in" with the right group that ultimately led me down the path of self-destruction.
I met Kathy during the first week of ninth grade. She was one of the most popular students, so when she befriended me, I was pretty excited. I'd never been part of the "in" group before.
It wasn't long before Kathy invited me to spend the night with her at another friend's house. But that night turned out to be much more than I'd expected. It was a major party, with lots of alcohol.
I'd never been to anything like that before. And before the night was over, I started feeling excited about everything—the sense of freedom, of having no limits, of trying something new and grown-up.
I didn't get drunk that night, but a pattern had begun. Before long, I was partying and getting drunk every weekend. I was staying out later and later. And since our house was still under construction, we didn't have a phone. So I would stay out as late as I wanted, then I'd lie about where I'd been. What could my folks do? They couldn't say, "Well, you should have called."
By that time, I wanted to be as thin as the other girls in my group of friends. So I started forcing myself to throw up after meals. In fact, I became so obsessed with my weight that when I was at a party, I'd drink until I'd get sick and throw up, just so those calories wouldn't be in my body.
And then there was shoplifting. Since it was a part of the "fun" my friends were into, I felt I had to join in, too. I enjoyed the thrill of getting away with it. At first, I mostly took small things that didn't cost much. But soon, I was taking clothes and other expensive things.
So there I was, a freshman in high school, a common thief with a drinking problem and an eating disorder. And all because I wanted so badly to "fit in."
As much as I loved being part of the in-crowd, I knew my life was out of control. I wanted things to change, but I couldn't do it on my own. If I said I wanted to change, my friends would immediately dump me. But secretly, I wanted to get caught. I felt that would be my only way out.
Then it happened.
First, my folks found the wine bottle. My mom and I were up all night yelling and fighting.
Then I got caught shoplifting. One of my friends who'd never shoplifted asked me to teach her how. She really wanted a bathing suit. We found one she liked and she took it. When we got outside the store, she asked if I would hold the bathing suit, because she was nervous.
Well, I got caught holding the goods, literally. It would have been easy for me to tell the store clerk that my friend took it. But for some reason, I covered for her.
The cops came, and took me away in the squad car. I had to call my parents to come and get me at the police station. The ride home was awful. My mom and dad sat together in the front seat, holding hands and crying. I sat by the window, staring outside, not believing what had just happened.
How could this be? I wondered. I felt so ashamed.
Shortly after that, one of my friends caught me throwing up. She called my parents to tell them. Even though I was angry at my friend for squealing on me, it was the best thing anyone could have done. My mom confronted me, and we really had it out that night. At that point, my mom realized my problems weren't going to go away on their own, and that I was really putting myself in danger.
My mom made an appointment for me to see a counselor, and I thought it was a good idea. Those counseling sessions helped a lot. We talked about the drinking, the stealing, the bulimia, my friends, how I was feeling, and what I wanted my life to be like.
I later learned how much my folks had worried about me and loved me through all the garbage I was doing. I found out my dad had been getting up at 4 o'clock every morning to pray for me. I cried when I heard that.
I knew I needed to make some changes in my life. I wanted to stop the drinking and throwing up and stealing because I was scared for my health and safety.
Also, I wanted to stop living a lie. I'd been lying to my parents all along. I'd been lying to my friends about what kind of person I was. And I'd been lying to myself about what was important to me. I was ashamed of the way I'd been living, and I knew it wasn't what God wanted for my life.
I had some big fears about changing, though. I knew I'd have to find some new friends who wouldn't pressure me to act a certain way. I was so afraid I'd end up with no friends at all. But God was already working on that. Within a short time, I met a group of girls who accepted me and cared about me for who I was. They also shared my Christian values, so I was free to be myself.
But sometimes change is slow. A year later, I decided to attend a party with some old friends. Even though I knew there'd be drinking, there were a few girls I really missed, so I decided to go. I decided I'd be careful and I wouldn't drink. I even felt like I could be an example to my old friends.
But things didn't turn out the way I'd planned. I wasn't at the party very long before I started drinking, and after a few hours, I was really drunk and sick. The only way I could get home was to call my dad, which was humiliating, especially after the promises I'd made.
In the car on the way home, my dad was really quiet. The only thing he said was, "You're old enough to punish yourself, Colleen."
Dad was right. I punished myself by refusing to go out—with any friends—for a long time.
Dad also suggested I start reading my Bible again.
He was right again. So I started reading it faithfully. And all over again, I could see how much God loves me, how much he cares for me, just the way I am.
That party incident was the last of its kind for me.
A couple years have gone by. I'm not interested in the party scene any more. My shoplifting days were done after that run-in with the police. And after a lot of counseling, I'm no longer fighting my eating disorder—though I still struggle with how I feel about my body.
I'm so much happier now. I'm hanging with a good group of friends, people who love me for who I am—not for somebody I'm pretending to be. And even though I care and worry about my old friends, I've decided not to spend time with them. I've learned the hard way that I can't handle it very well.
When I last saw my old friends, one of them asked me, "What happened to you? You used to be so much fun at parties, but we never see you anymore. You should hang out with us again."
I just smiled and said, "No thanks. I'm much happier now."
- Kenzie Blake
I'm not exactly sure when I realized my life was spinning out of control. Maybe it was that night in the police car. I'd just been caught shoplifting, and they were taking me down to the police station.
Maybe it was the night my parents found an empty wine bottle in my closet. They'd suspected I'd been drinking, but when they found that bottle, they knew it was serious.
Or maybe it was the day one of my friends caught me throwing up. No, I wasn't hung over. I was just obsessed with being thin; I wanted to look good for my friends, so I'd fallen into a cycle of binge-and-purge, eat-and-vomit.
It was disgusting. And I was disgusted with myself.
How had it come to this, anyway?
I'd grown up in a Christian family. I thought I had my act together … until I hit high school. That's when things started happening, things that led to some major changes in my life—and some bad decisions on my part.
First, we started building a new house, and the only time we could work on it was on weekends. We stopped going to church regularly. Eventually, we spent less and less time praying and reading the Bible.
Second, my best friend moved away the summer before I started ninth grade. I felt really lost and alone, so when school started that fall, I was desperate for some new friends. And it was that desperation, my intense desire to "fit in" with the right group that ultimately led me down the path of self-destruction.
I met Kathy during the first week of ninth grade. She was one of the most popular students, so when she befriended me, I was pretty excited. I'd never been part of the "in" group before.
It wasn't long before Kathy invited me to spend the night with her at another friend's house. But that night turned out to be much more than I'd expected. It was a major party, with lots of alcohol.
I'd never been to anything like that before. And before the night was over, I started feeling excited about everything—the sense of freedom, of having no limits, of trying something new and grown-up.
I didn't get drunk that night, but a pattern had begun. Before long, I was partying and getting drunk every weekend. I was staying out later and later. And since our house was still under construction, we didn't have a phone. So I would stay out as late as I wanted, then I'd lie about where I'd been. What could my folks do? They couldn't say, "Well, you should have called."
By that time, I wanted to be as thin as the other girls in my group of friends. So I started forcing myself to throw up after meals. In fact, I became so obsessed with my weight that when I was at a party, I'd drink until I'd get sick and throw up, just so those calories wouldn't be in my body.
And then there was shoplifting. Since it was a part of the "fun" my friends were into, I felt I had to join in, too. I enjoyed the thrill of getting away with it. At first, I mostly took small things that didn't cost much. But soon, I was taking clothes and other expensive things.
So there I was, a freshman in high school, a common thief with a drinking problem and an eating disorder. And all because I wanted so badly to "fit in."
As much as I loved being part of the in-crowd, I knew my life was out of control. I wanted things to change, but I couldn't do it on my own. If I said I wanted to change, my friends would immediately dump me. But secretly, I wanted to get caught. I felt that would be my only way out.
Then it happened.
First, my folks found the wine bottle. My mom and I were up all night yelling and fighting.
Then I got caught shoplifting. One of my friends who'd never shoplifted asked me to teach her how. She really wanted a bathing suit. We found one she liked and she took it. When we got outside the store, she asked if I would hold the bathing suit, because she was nervous.
Well, I got caught holding the goods, literally. It would have been easy for me to tell the store clerk that my friend took it. But for some reason, I covered for her.
The cops came, and took me away in the squad car. I had to call my parents to come and get me at the police station. The ride home was awful. My mom and dad sat together in the front seat, holding hands and crying. I sat by the window, staring outside, not believing what had just happened.
How could this be? I wondered. I felt so ashamed.
Shortly after that, one of my friends caught me throwing up. She called my parents to tell them. Even though I was angry at my friend for squealing on me, it was the best thing anyone could have done. My mom confronted me, and we really had it out that night. At that point, my mom realized my problems weren't going to go away on their own, and that I was really putting myself in danger.
My mom made an appointment for me to see a counselor, and I thought it was a good idea. Those counseling sessions helped a lot. We talked about the drinking, the stealing, the bulimia, my friends, how I was feeling, and what I wanted my life to be like.
I later learned how much my folks had worried about me and loved me through all the garbage I was doing. I found out my dad had been getting up at 4 o'clock every morning to pray for me. I cried when I heard that.
I knew I needed to make some changes in my life. I wanted to stop the drinking and throwing up and stealing because I was scared for my health and safety.
Also, I wanted to stop living a lie. I'd been lying to my parents all along. I'd been lying to my friends about what kind of person I was. And I'd been lying to myself about what was important to me. I was ashamed of the way I'd been living, and I knew it wasn't what God wanted for my life.
I had some big fears about changing, though. I knew I'd have to find some new friends who wouldn't pressure me to act a certain way. I was so afraid I'd end up with no friends at all. But God was already working on that. Within a short time, I met a group of girls who accepted me and cared about me for who I was. They also shared my Christian values, so I was free to be myself.
But sometimes change is slow. A year later, I decided to attend a party with some old friends. Even though I knew there'd be drinking, there were a few girls I really missed, so I decided to go. I decided I'd be careful and I wouldn't drink. I even felt like I could be an example to my old friends.
But things didn't turn out the way I'd planned. I wasn't at the party very long before I started drinking, and after a few hours, I was really drunk and sick. The only way I could get home was to call my dad, which was humiliating, especially after the promises I'd made.
In the car on the way home, my dad was really quiet. The only thing he said was, "You're old enough to punish yourself, Colleen."
Dad was right. I punished myself by refusing to go out—with any friends—for a long time.
Dad also suggested I start reading my Bible again.
He was right again. So I started reading it faithfully. And all over again, I could see how much God loves me, how much he cares for me, just the way I am.
That party incident was the last of its kind for me.
A couple years have gone by. I'm not interested in the party scene any more. My shoplifting days were done after that run-in with the police. And after a lot of counseling, I'm no longer fighting my eating disorder—though I still struggle with how I feel about my body.
I'm so much happier now. I'm hanging with a good group of friends, people who love me for who I am—not for somebody I'm pretending to be. And even though I care and worry about my old friends, I've decided not to spend time with them. I've learned the hard way that I can't handle it very well.
When I last saw my old friends, one of them asked me, "What happened to you? You used to be so much fun at parties, but we never see you anymore. You should hang out with us again."
I just smiled and said, "No thanks. I'm much happier now."
- Kenzie Blake
Hey everyone,
My name is Sarah. A lot of people call me Sarah Jane.
I have been a Christian for 24 years and I know what its like to go through
the ups and downs in our lives.
I started writing when I was nine and God has been using my talent
with every opportunity.
Come and visit Sarah's Room.
__________________________
February 5, 2015
The Full Armor of God. Part 1.
I remember in Sunday School when I was a kid we would talk about the armor of God and what each part of the armor meant. I honestly didn’t know what it was about for a while and why we had to learn it until I read through Ephesians. I love this book in the Bible. I think I may have read it over ten times.
Anyway, I started studying the Armor of God and I wanted to share it with you all. Ephesians 6:13, Therefore put on the whole armor of God in this evil day so that you may stand firm.
Belt of Truth: When you think about it, the belt is what keeps the sword of the Spirit at hand and in real terms, it keeps the body from being exposed. The belt is to keep everything in place and that is what truth is. One of my favorite bands: Steam Powered Giraffe, puts it like this, “Nobody wants their pants to fall down.”
And that’s what happens when you do not have a belt, right? If we don’t have truth, then our faith and even our lives come crashing down. If you do not know truth, then you are exposed to sin and you are not secure in your faith.
Breastplate of Righteousness:
When I researched this part of the armor, my mind was blown. Not only was the breastplate supposed to protect your vital organs in battle, it was also an item of status. Sometimes the armor piece would have the soldier’s Coat of Arms or some sort of fierce animal was etched upon the front. Why? To let the enemy know who they were up against! Righteousness is defined by how right and just someone is. God has etched his seal upon the front of your armor so the enemy knows that you’re coming!
Shoes of Peace:
I have an Army Dad and if it’s one thing I know, a soldier must have a pair of good, heavy duty army boots. Back in the day in the 1940s, soldiers on the front would end up getting Trench foot and it would get so bad that their feet would rot and fall off. The shoes in Roman times was a leather moccasin covered by protective armor boots. Peace: Free from disturbance. A soldier would not be at peace if he was running toward the enemy with shoes that hurt him. He wouldn’t be able to focus. A soldier is on his feet always so that he is able to focus on what is ahead of him and not worry about the small things like shoes that pinch your feet.
Shield of Faith:
We all know that Faith is a major component of being a Christian and we all know what faith is, believing in something or someone you cannot see. Faith is to protect you from the words of doubt from the enemy. Without faith, we are defenseless, the same thing goes for a soldier in battle. He is done for without something to block the blows of the enemy.
So, I do encourage you all to read and know the word and what it says, I had no idea this is what God meant about the Armor until I decided to research it again. It may surprise you what you find and how it can apply to your life even if the Bible is a million years old.
So, put on the armor of God and be a successful soldier for the enemy doesn’t attack the ones who are weak, they attack the ones who are strong enough to run them into the ground in battle. I will post the next part and the rest of the armor next time. In the meantime, read the Bible and get close to Christ because he loves you and wants to don that lovely shining armor on you because he is so proud of you.
SJ. J
~~~~~~~~~~
My name is Sarah. A lot of people call me Sarah Jane.
I have been a Christian for 24 years and I know what its like to go through
the ups and downs in our lives.
I started writing when I was nine and God has been using my talent
with every opportunity.
Come and visit Sarah's Room.
__________________________
February 5, 2015
The Full Armor of God. Part 1.
I remember in Sunday School when I was a kid we would talk about the armor of God and what each part of the armor meant. I honestly didn’t know what it was about for a while and why we had to learn it until I read through Ephesians. I love this book in the Bible. I think I may have read it over ten times.
Anyway, I started studying the Armor of God and I wanted to share it with you all. Ephesians 6:13, Therefore put on the whole armor of God in this evil day so that you may stand firm.
Belt of Truth: When you think about it, the belt is what keeps the sword of the Spirit at hand and in real terms, it keeps the body from being exposed. The belt is to keep everything in place and that is what truth is. One of my favorite bands: Steam Powered Giraffe, puts it like this, “Nobody wants their pants to fall down.”
And that’s what happens when you do not have a belt, right? If we don’t have truth, then our faith and even our lives come crashing down. If you do not know truth, then you are exposed to sin and you are not secure in your faith.
Breastplate of Righteousness:
When I researched this part of the armor, my mind was blown. Not only was the breastplate supposed to protect your vital organs in battle, it was also an item of status. Sometimes the armor piece would have the soldier’s Coat of Arms or some sort of fierce animal was etched upon the front. Why? To let the enemy know who they were up against! Righteousness is defined by how right and just someone is. God has etched his seal upon the front of your armor so the enemy knows that you’re coming!
Shoes of Peace:
I have an Army Dad and if it’s one thing I know, a soldier must have a pair of good, heavy duty army boots. Back in the day in the 1940s, soldiers on the front would end up getting Trench foot and it would get so bad that their feet would rot and fall off. The shoes in Roman times was a leather moccasin covered by protective armor boots. Peace: Free from disturbance. A soldier would not be at peace if he was running toward the enemy with shoes that hurt him. He wouldn’t be able to focus. A soldier is on his feet always so that he is able to focus on what is ahead of him and not worry about the small things like shoes that pinch your feet.
Shield of Faith:
We all know that Faith is a major component of being a Christian and we all know what faith is, believing in something or someone you cannot see. Faith is to protect you from the words of doubt from the enemy. Without faith, we are defenseless, the same thing goes for a soldier in battle. He is done for without something to block the blows of the enemy.
So, I do encourage you all to read and know the word and what it says, I had no idea this is what God meant about the Armor until I decided to research it again. It may surprise you what you find and how it can apply to your life even if the Bible is a million years old.
So, put on the armor of God and be a successful soldier for the enemy doesn’t attack the ones who are weak, they attack the ones who are strong enough to run them into the ground in battle. I will post the next part and the rest of the armor next time. In the meantime, read the Bible and get close to Christ because he loves you and wants to don that lovely shining armor on you because he is so proud of you.
SJ. J
~~~~~~~~~~
IIt happened when I was 12, but I remember the moment like it happened this morning. My older brother had gotten himself into trouble—again. My mom and I were folding laundry, talking about the situation and how worried she was about my brother's actions. Then she said to me, "I know we'll never have to worry about you, honey."
Now my mom meant it as a compliment. Her intention was to tell me she knew I was well-behaved and smart enough to avoid some of the stuff that had gotten my brother in hot water. But in my mind, her words set a huge weight on my shoulders. When she said, "We'll never have to worry about you," I heard, "Make sure we never have to worry about you."
That simple conversation set me on a mission—to be the perfect daughter. My goal was to make sure my parents never had a doubt about where I was, what I was doing or who I was with. So I never missed a curfew, never drank a beer, never hung out with anyone who might lead me into trouble.
Those few times I did get into trouble with my parents, I felt horrible. And even though I got off with a few stern words, I still felt like I'd let them down.
My desire to be perfect carried over to my relationship with God. I honestly thought God would love me more if I went to youth group, if I said my prayers, if I went to Bible camp, never did anything to get grounded etc. I believed I could impress God if I did all the right Christian things. I didn't always do those things because I wanted to. I did them because I wanted God to think I was perfect.
And I know I'm not the only one who has felt like being a good person—being a perfect Christian—is the key to God's heart.
The Problem with Perfection
Striving for excellence isn't always a bad thing. Doing our best is part of the Christian life. Way back in the Old Testament, God's people were told to "present as the Lord's portion the best and holiest part of everything given to you" (Numbers 18:29). Even though God was talking about tithes and offerings, we know our whole lives are offerings to God, and that we need to give God our best.
The New Testament is just as clear. Matthew 5:48 says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." We are supposed to shoot for the highest standard of goodness—God's goodness. And Paul tells the Corinthians, "Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" (1 Corinthians 10:31).
But perfectionism is "doing our best" for all the wrong reasons. Perfectionism is about us, not about God.
I was being good because I thought it would help me earn love and acceptance. If my behavior pleased my parents, they'd love me even more. If my behavior pleased God, I'd earn his favor. I came to believe my worth was based on how good I was—and on how good other people thought I was.
Inside, I was stressed out. The pressure to be perfect was almost too much to handle. But I didn't think I could tell anyone how I felt because that would mean admitting I wasn't perfect. And that was the last thing I wanted to do.
God's Perfect Plan
When it comes to God's love, we perfectionists tend to get the order of things all mixed up. We think, If I'm good enough, if I do all the right things, God will love me. But God reached out while we were still sinners (Romans 5:8). God made the first move.
Once sin entered the world, the relationship between God and humans was strained. And all through the Bible, people tried to fix that relationship with animal sacrifices, with money, even with a huge tower to heaven. But it took God's sacrifice to bring us back to him. God's incredible gift of salvation is ours because God loves us, not because we earned it. (Check out Romans 4:4-5.)
When Jesus tells us to "be perfect" in Matthew 5:48, he's saying that God's idea of perfection is radically different from the world's idea of perfection. The world says perfection is having the best body, the most popular friends, the happiest family. But Jesus tells us God is our best example of perfection. That means perfection is only found in striving to follow God. And as the apostle Paul explains in Philippians 3:12-16, God wants us to keep our eyes on him and follow the example of Christ in all we do.
Yet even Paul, one of the greatest Christians of all time, admitted he wasn't perfect. He knew he could only gain salvation through a relationship with Christ. But he continued to do his best as a natural response to God's love for him. And for Paul, doing his best meant growing in his faith, seeking God in everything he did, loving God with his whole heart.
The same is true for us. Being perfect in Christ isn't about living up to expectations—the world's, your parents', your own. It's about being obedient to God, day in and day out.
But before we perfectionists get all worked up about trying to be perfectly obedient, we need to remember this: The Bible says our actions don't have anything to do with God's acceptance of us (Ephesians 2:8-9). They are simply a sign of God living in us, a result of the new life we have in Christ (James 2:14-26). They demonstrate our desire to make our faith stronger. They are a way for us to give glory to our loving God. And when we follow God's commandments, we show his light to others (Matthew 5:16).
Showing others the light of God doesn't mean you can never mess up. In fact, our efforts to be perfect can often give people the wrong idea about our faith. One of my friends once told me she didn't think she was good enough to be a Christian. She didn't think she could live up to the expectations everyone had of Christians—always being nice, never getting into trouble. She saw Christianity as a secret club that only the "good" kids could belong to. My efforts to be the perfect person sure didn't help her think otherwise. But if I'd have been more honest about my own failures and shown her how God forgives, she might have felt differently.
Perfectionism is a losing game. Fortunately, it's one we really don't have to play. After all, God reached out to us when we were as far away from him as we could possibly be. Being a Christian isn't about being perfect; it's about being forgiven. So we can relax and be confident that God knows we're not perfect and loves us just the same.
- Tammy Pollard
Now my mom meant it as a compliment. Her intention was to tell me she knew I was well-behaved and smart enough to avoid some of the stuff that had gotten my brother in hot water. But in my mind, her words set a huge weight on my shoulders. When she said, "We'll never have to worry about you," I heard, "Make sure we never have to worry about you."
That simple conversation set me on a mission—to be the perfect daughter. My goal was to make sure my parents never had a doubt about where I was, what I was doing or who I was with. So I never missed a curfew, never drank a beer, never hung out with anyone who might lead me into trouble.
Those few times I did get into trouble with my parents, I felt horrible. And even though I got off with a few stern words, I still felt like I'd let them down.
My desire to be perfect carried over to my relationship with God. I honestly thought God would love me more if I went to youth group, if I said my prayers, if I went to Bible camp, never did anything to get grounded etc. I believed I could impress God if I did all the right Christian things. I didn't always do those things because I wanted to. I did them because I wanted God to think I was perfect.
And I know I'm not the only one who has felt like being a good person—being a perfect Christian—is the key to God's heart.
The Problem with Perfection
Striving for excellence isn't always a bad thing. Doing our best is part of the Christian life. Way back in the Old Testament, God's people were told to "present as the Lord's portion the best and holiest part of everything given to you" (Numbers 18:29). Even though God was talking about tithes and offerings, we know our whole lives are offerings to God, and that we need to give God our best.
The New Testament is just as clear. Matthew 5:48 says, "Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." We are supposed to shoot for the highest standard of goodness—God's goodness. And Paul tells the Corinthians, "Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" (1 Corinthians 10:31).
But perfectionism is "doing our best" for all the wrong reasons. Perfectionism is about us, not about God.
I was being good because I thought it would help me earn love and acceptance. If my behavior pleased my parents, they'd love me even more. If my behavior pleased God, I'd earn his favor. I came to believe my worth was based on how good I was—and on how good other people thought I was.
Inside, I was stressed out. The pressure to be perfect was almost too much to handle. But I didn't think I could tell anyone how I felt because that would mean admitting I wasn't perfect. And that was the last thing I wanted to do.
God's Perfect Plan
When it comes to God's love, we perfectionists tend to get the order of things all mixed up. We think, If I'm good enough, if I do all the right things, God will love me. But God reached out while we were still sinners (Romans 5:8). God made the first move.
Once sin entered the world, the relationship between God and humans was strained. And all through the Bible, people tried to fix that relationship with animal sacrifices, with money, even with a huge tower to heaven. But it took God's sacrifice to bring us back to him. God's incredible gift of salvation is ours because God loves us, not because we earned it. (Check out Romans 4:4-5.)
When Jesus tells us to "be perfect" in Matthew 5:48, he's saying that God's idea of perfection is radically different from the world's idea of perfection. The world says perfection is having the best body, the most popular friends, the happiest family. But Jesus tells us God is our best example of perfection. That means perfection is only found in striving to follow God. And as the apostle Paul explains in Philippians 3:12-16, God wants us to keep our eyes on him and follow the example of Christ in all we do.
Yet even Paul, one of the greatest Christians of all time, admitted he wasn't perfect. He knew he could only gain salvation through a relationship with Christ. But he continued to do his best as a natural response to God's love for him. And for Paul, doing his best meant growing in his faith, seeking God in everything he did, loving God with his whole heart.
The same is true for us. Being perfect in Christ isn't about living up to expectations—the world's, your parents', your own. It's about being obedient to God, day in and day out.
But before we perfectionists get all worked up about trying to be perfectly obedient, we need to remember this: The Bible says our actions don't have anything to do with God's acceptance of us (Ephesians 2:8-9). They are simply a sign of God living in us, a result of the new life we have in Christ (James 2:14-26). They demonstrate our desire to make our faith stronger. They are a way for us to give glory to our loving God. And when we follow God's commandments, we show his light to others (Matthew 5:16).
Showing others the light of God doesn't mean you can never mess up. In fact, our efforts to be perfect can often give people the wrong idea about our faith. One of my friends once told me she didn't think she was good enough to be a Christian. She didn't think she could live up to the expectations everyone had of Christians—always being nice, never getting into trouble. She saw Christianity as a secret club that only the "good" kids could belong to. My efforts to be the perfect person sure didn't help her think otherwise. But if I'd have been more honest about my own failures and shown her how God forgives, she might have felt differently.
Perfectionism is a losing game. Fortunately, it's one we really don't have to play. After all, God reached out to us when we were as far away from him as we could possibly be. Being a Christian isn't about being perfect; it's about being forgiven. So we can relax and be confident that God knows we're not perfect and loves us just the same.
- Tammy Pollard
Causes Of All Fatal Accidents
Do NOT ride in automobiles: they cause 20% of all fatal accidents.
Do NOT stay home: 17% of all accidents do occur in the home.
Do NOT walk on the streets or sidewalks: 14% of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
Do NOT travel by air, rail, or water: 16% of all accidents happen on these.
Only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services in church, and these are related to previous physical disorders.
Hence, the safest place for you to be at any time is church. [Bible study is safe, too. The percentage there is even less.]
Go to church! IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE!
- Victoria
Do NOT ride in automobiles: they cause 20% of all fatal accidents.
Do NOT stay home: 17% of all accidents do occur in the home.
Do NOT walk on the streets or sidewalks: 14% of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
Do NOT travel by air, rail, or water: 16% of all accidents happen on these.
Only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services in church, and these are related to previous physical disorders.
Hence, the safest place for you to be at any time is church. [Bible study is safe, too. The percentage there is even less.]
Go to church! IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE!
- Victoria
Tim - from Sweden
Hello
I would like to share with you something that I have learned. When I was around 14 years old, my life in Christ really started to kick in. I had a real hunger for Jesus and was seeking Him diligently. This was going on for quite some time and when I was 15, it started to die slowly. I was in real ‘panic’ because I didn’t know what was going on.
I then went the wrong way and turned to my flesh to find satisfaction. I wasted so much time, especially on computer games. I felt so 'rubbish' with how much time I was wasting. There would be times in-between where I had some burning in my heart again, but it was soon gone again.
This had been going on for almost one year and I hated the ‘on-and-off’ life. GALATIANS 6:8 'FOR HE THAT SOWETH TO HIS FLESH SHALL OF THE FLESH REAP CORRUPTION; BUT HE THAT SOWETH TO THE SPIRIT SHALL OF THE SPIRIT REAP LIFE EVERLASTING'.
I prayed that God would set my heart on fire again. I then still had some battles against the flesh, but I did start to feel that I was getting closer to God. God showed me that He was not angry at me but was waiting for me to come to Him. God is always ready to help us with our struggles. I know that I can’t fight the flesh on my own, because Scripture says that: 'A house divided against itself cannot stand'; so flesh against flesh doesn’t work. We need Jesus to help us. God will bring us to a place where WE make the choice! He will not use us like puppets and put us suddenly on the right way. He may show us many scriptures, passages, etc., but WE have to make the choice. Even though I did make the wrong choices over and over again, I know God saw my heart that I wanted to change and He will not cast me off (PSALM 37:23,24).
I am really grateful for the patience, mercy, and grace that God has towards us (see EPHESIANS 2:4-9,13-16). The flesh is a really dangerous thing to play with and we need to mortify it EVERY DAY! I praise the Lord that He is teaching me the right way.
Love in Christ, Tim
Hello
I would like to share with you something that I have learned. When I was around 14 years old, my life in Christ really started to kick in. I had a real hunger for Jesus and was seeking Him diligently. This was going on for quite some time and when I was 15, it started to die slowly. I was in real ‘panic’ because I didn’t know what was going on.
I then went the wrong way and turned to my flesh to find satisfaction. I wasted so much time, especially on computer games. I felt so 'rubbish' with how much time I was wasting. There would be times in-between where I had some burning in my heart again, but it was soon gone again.
This had been going on for almost one year and I hated the ‘on-and-off’ life. GALATIANS 6:8 'FOR HE THAT SOWETH TO HIS FLESH SHALL OF THE FLESH REAP CORRUPTION; BUT HE THAT SOWETH TO THE SPIRIT SHALL OF THE SPIRIT REAP LIFE EVERLASTING'.
I prayed that God would set my heart on fire again. I then still had some battles against the flesh, but I did start to feel that I was getting closer to God. God showed me that He was not angry at me but was waiting for me to come to Him. God is always ready to help us with our struggles. I know that I can’t fight the flesh on my own, because Scripture says that: 'A house divided against itself cannot stand'; so flesh against flesh doesn’t work. We need Jesus to help us. God will bring us to a place where WE make the choice! He will not use us like puppets and put us suddenly on the right way. He may show us many scriptures, passages, etc., but WE have to make the choice. Even though I did make the wrong choices over and over again, I know God saw my heart that I wanted to change and He will not cast me off (PSALM 37:23,24).
I am really grateful for the patience, mercy, and grace that God has towards us (see EPHESIANS 2:4-9,13-16). The flesh is a really dangerous thing to play with and we need to mortify it EVERY DAY! I praise the Lord that He is teaching me the right way.
Love in Christ, Tim
Just love this song and had to share - Kelly Garrison
Why God ???
My life has already been hard, and I'm only sixteen. Things I have gone through, people I've met and never saw again, have all piled on top of the pain of a life-changing accident I had at the age of six.
My dad owned some farmland in a little town in southwest Arizona. He had farming machines that I thought were amazing; I mean, who wouldn’t at that age? One day, after I had gotten my homework done, I asked my mom if I could ride with dad in what he called a "swather," which was a machine that cut farm grass, such as Alfalfa or Bermuda.
I rode my bike to where he was cutting and started to climb down the ditch to the field so I could get a ride. I stepped into a pile of cut grass but didn't see what was underneath it: a gopher hole. My foot went in deep, and my leg twisted and cracked. I couldn’t walk or even stand because I was in so much pain.
My dad stopped the machine and ran to me. I was crying so much. I even screamed when he tried to move me. He finally got my mom to pick me up and take me to the doctor. They found that I had seriously broken the tibia and the fibula in the lower part of my left leg. That was just the beginning of years of hospital visits and doctors’ appointments.
I had to give up sports and running, and the doctor said that I might have to give up walking, but he was determined not to let that happen. In the countless times I stayed in a hospital room for days, even weeks at a time, I did the one and only thing I could do: draw and write.
Recently, I was looking through my old notebooks, sketchbooks, notepads, folders, binders, and such, all filled with things I have written, drawn, or just created. It is hard to believe how much you can see a change in yourself as you look at things from your past. It's almost like looking back in time. Better than a picture that was taken, but it's also a little scary.
When I consider the journey I have gone through just to get to who I am today, and I can’t help but think that the accident was what kept me on track spiritually. All the times I asked God, "Why me?" I just had to remember that everything goes as planned, the way He had designed my life before I was born.
Jeremiah 29:11 says, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Anything that you go through, any pain, any hurt, God will always be there. When you are sitting in the corner of your room, crying your eyes out, God is there. Even during thoughts of suicide or running away or inflicting damage on yourself, He is there.
Trust the plan that He has for you and have faith that He will come through. These events and pains will prepare you for what comes ahead. What happens in your future is why He allows the pain to happen today.
I don’t have a 12-step program to help you get out of your depression or your pain. But I can tell you that He will get you through the storm. Place your faith and trust in Him alone (Proverbs 3:5-6).
"...for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity..." --Proverbs 24:16
—Stephanie
My life has already been hard, and I'm only sixteen. Things I have gone through, people I've met and never saw again, have all piled on top of the pain of a life-changing accident I had at the age of six.
My dad owned some farmland in a little town in southwest Arizona. He had farming machines that I thought were amazing; I mean, who wouldn’t at that age? One day, after I had gotten my homework done, I asked my mom if I could ride with dad in what he called a "swather," which was a machine that cut farm grass, such as Alfalfa or Bermuda.
I rode my bike to where he was cutting and started to climb down the ditch to the field so I could get a ride. I stepped into a pile of cut grass but didn't see what was underneath it: a gopher hole. My foot went in deep, and my leg twisted and cracked. I couldn’t walk or even stand because I was in so much pain.
My dad stopped the machine and ran to me. I was crying so much. I even screamed when he tried to move me. He finally got my mom to pick me up and take me to the doctor. They found that I had seriously broken the tibia and the fibula in the lower part of my left leg. That was just the beginning of years of hospital visits and doctors’ appointments.
I had to give up sports and running, and the doctor said that I might have to give up walking, but he was determined not to let that happen. In the countless times I stayed in a hospital room for days, even weeks at a time, I did the one and only thing I could do: draw and write.
Recently, I was looking through my old notebooks, sketchbooks, notepads, folders, binders, and such, all filled with things I have written, drawn, or just created. It is hard to believe how much you can see a change in yourself as you look at things from your past. It's almost like looking back in time. Better than a picture that was taken, but it's also a little scary.
When I consider the journey I have gone through just to get to who I am today, and I can’t help but think that the accident was what kept me on track spiritually. All the times I asked God, "Why me?" I just had to remember that everything goes as planned, the way He had designed my life before I was born.
Jeremiah 29:11 says, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Anything that you go through, any pain, any hurt, God will always be there. When you are sitting in the corner of your room, crying your eyes out, God is there. Even during thoughts of suicide or running away or inflicting damage on yourself, He is there.
Trust the plan that He has for you and have faith that He will come through. These events and pains will prepare you for what comes ahead. What happens in your future is why He allows the pain to happen today.
I don’t have a 12-step program to help you get out of your depression or your pain. But I can tell you that He will get you through the storm. Place your faith and trust in Him alone (Proverbs 3:5-6).
"...for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity..." --Proverbs 24:16
—Stephanie
How Many Times Do You Say?
Originally written in the compiled writings of While I'm Waiting
by Arianna Persephone Scritpsmith
Many times You speak of forgiveness
But how many times must we forgive?
Is seven enough, Lord? Is it enough?
That's when You shake Your head in loving bemusement
"No, My child, that isn't enough
You must forgive as many times as seventy times that"
But, Lord, he trashed me and I fell hard
Almost as if he stabbed my back and asked why I bled
You shrug and say once again, "seventy times seven."
But, Lord, it hurts so much why must I forgive?
I lost my heart to his scarring, can I jus--
"Seventy time seven" you say to my heart,
"If you don't forgive them, neither will My Father forgive you"
My heart fell and I made my choice
We, as one speak the saying,
"Seventy times seven."
"Again and again..." I continue
Then You hold my hand and whisper in my ear,
"Love as I have loved you, for that is how they'll know you're mine."
Be at peace with yesterday, be wise with today, and be secure with tomorrow!
Originally written in the compiled writings of While I'm Waiting
by Arianna Persephone Scritpsmith
Many times You speak of forgiveness
But how many times must we forgive?
Is seven enough, Lord? Is it enough?
That's when You shake Your head in loving bemusement
"No, My child, that isn't enough
You must forgive as many times as seventy times that"
But, Lord, he trashed me and I fell hard
Almost as if he stabbed my back and asked why I bled
You shrug and say once again, "seventy times seven."
But, Lord, it hurts so much why must I forgive?
I lost my heart to his scarring, can I jus--
"Seventy time seven" you say to my heart,
"If you don't forgive them, neither will My Father forgive you"
My heart fell and I made my choice
We, as one speak the saying,
"Seventy times seven."
"Again and again..." I continue
Then You hold my hand and whisper in my ear,
"Love as I have loved you, for that is how they'll know you're mine."
Be at peace with yesterday, be wise with today, and be secure with tomorrow!
Hi everyone. I know that this isn't exactly a "Chrisitan song" but it just reminds me that I am beautiful and I am on top of the world - and you are too ... because of Jesus !
- Kimberly age 14 Australia
- Kimberly age 14 Australia
Amazing how God works! ....
Last night I was rushed to the Emergency Room because I had an asthma attack. While laying in the hospital bed taking the medicine they gave me the nurse came in and explained everything. When she was done she asked me something. She said, "Why are you not worried? Usually kids who come to the Emergency room are crying, stressed and worried." At that moment I was able to share God's word and love with her. I told her I wasn't worried because I know God is with me and He is going to be with me. I told her that I believe God is going to heal me. She was really interested and I told her the story about the women in the bible who had a bleeding problem and she yearned to touch the hem of Jesus's garment. I told her that she believed He could heal her and He did. It's no different now. We have to yearn to touch His garment and believe He can heal us. She was greatly encouraged by that. Later she saw my mom and I praying and she came in and asked to join us. I looked at her, gave her a big smile and said of course. We prayed and she asked if it was too late to ask Jesus to live in her heart and become the Lord and Savior of her life. I told her it was never too late. We prayed a simple prayer and that night she was saved. We talked for the rest of the time I was at the hospital. When I was leaving she said, "Thank you!" I told her not to thank me but thank God. God gave me a wonderful opportunity to share His word and through that someone was save and a member of out family was added. Though I was struggling, physically, I was able to share God's love with His help. DO NOT LET ANYTHING HOLD YOU BACK FROM SHARING GOD'S LOVE AND WORD WITH OTHERS! IT CAN CHANGE THEIR LIFE!
- Mikaela
Last night I was rushed to the Emergency Room because I had an asthma attack. While laying in the hospital bed taking the medicine they gave me the nurse came in and explained everything. When she was done she asked me something. She said, "Why are you not worried? Usually kids who come to the Emergency room are crying, stressed and worried." At that moment I was able to share God's word and love with her. I told her I wasn't worried because I know God is with me and He is going to be with me. I told her that I believe God is going to heal me. She was really interested and I told her the story about the women in the bible who had a bleeding problem and she yearned to touch the hem of Jesus's garment. I told her that she believed He could heal her and He did. It's no different now. We have to yearn to touch His garment and believe He can heal us. She was greatly encouraged by that. Later she saw my mom and I praying and she came in and asked to join us. I looked at her, gave her a big smile and said of course. We prayed and she asked if it was too late to ask Jesus to live in her heart and become the Lord and Savior of her life. I told her it was never too late. We prayed a simple prayer and that night she was saved. We talked for the rest of the time I was at the hospital. When I was leaving she said, "Thank you!" I told her not to thank me but thank God. God gave me a wonderful opportunity to share His word and through that someone was save and a member of out family was added. Though I was struggling, physically, I was able to share God's love with His help. DO NOT LET ANYTHING HOLD YOU BACK FROM SHARING GOD'S LOVE AND WORD WITH OTHERS! IT CAN CHANGE THEIR LIFE!
- Mikaela
The little boy had just turned 8 years old. Three months ago, he had given his heart to Jesus and he was so happy. Today, he was standing by third base watching a baseball game at school. He loved baseball. His attention diverted momentarily to something else in the school yard and he didn’t notice the big kid who had come up to bat. Suddenly, his friend Chuck yelled at him to duck. He turned, just in time to be hit full force in the right side of the head by a line drive. Everything went black and he slumped to the ground.
When he came to, the baseball team had gathered around him. His head hurt and his face was numb. He was sent home and his mother took him to the hospital. He was checked over by the emergency room doctor and x-rays were taken. They were told that nothing was broken and that the swelling would subside in a day or so. The little boy was sent home.
The incident was soon forgotten and life went on. The little boy loved sports, especially street hockey and riding his bike. He also loved music. He played a keyboard and was pretty good at it. Over that summer, the little boy started having dizzy spells, headaches and weakness. Sometimes he would lose his balance for no reason. He would fall off his bike resulting in a lot of skinned knees. He would forget things and sometimes his left hand couldn’t keep up with his right when playing the piano.
In the fall, he was excited about starting the third grade with all his friends. He loved school and someday wanted to be a medical missionary. Trick or treating was going to be really fun that year. On that night, he was out with friends running around the neighborhood collecting lots of goodies. Suddenly the little boy started losing his coordination and he tripped on his costume, tearing it. He was very tired and called it a night. The next day after school he was too exhausted to play street hockey. That evening he started to develop a headache over his right eye. It got so bad he wanted to scream. He became sick to his stomach and the vision in his right eye started fading in and out. What was happening? Thinking he’d over done it with all the trick or treating excitement his parents put him to bed.
At 5:00 am the little boy woke up with horrible nausea. He was blind in his left eye and the left side of his body was limp like a rag doll. He was paralyzed. His parents heard him moaning and rushed him to the hospital. He faded in and out of consciousness. There were lights, doctors and nurses, technicians, tubes, needles, sirens, IV poles, stretchers, flashes, dark, noise, quiet, cold, warm, red, white a mixed blur, then - nothing.
When the little boy opened his eyes, he was so tired he couldn’t lift his head. He was in a big bed. There were curtains around him and blurry lights. There was bandages and gauze from his right ear down the right side of his neck. He recognized whispering voices of his Mom and Dad beside him. They were praying for him.
Their little boy was in the Neurological Intensive Care Unit at the world-renowned Hospital for Sick Children after suffering a massive stroke. He had a blood clot in an artery leading to his brain and had just undergone emergency surgery. One of the most prominent pediatric neuro surgeons in the world was attending their little son and was gently preparing them for the worst. Death was imminent.
Hours in the ICU blurred into days for the little boy. He was then moved to the neurosurgical ward. He was paralyzed but more aware of his surroundings. The kid in the next bed was Joey. Joey had a brain tumor the size of a lemon. He would scream and cry all night and moan all day. The little boy would pray for him but Joey died on the operating table in a few days. The next roommate was in the same condition. The ward was filled with little kids with tumors, brain hemorrhages and aneurysms. The little boy’s Mom would visit him every day. Sometimes she would put him in a wheelchair and push him through the hallways of little faces full of shaved heads, sunken eyes in their dark sockets staring back. It was a living nightmare. The sights and smells beyond description. The little boy was afraid to make any friends on the ward because friends seemed to die almost as fast as you made them. Every day, an endless routine of needles, tests and scans. Some under anesthesia with days of nausea and recovery. Nights of convulsions, fevers and lying in a wet bed for hours when overworked nurses were sometimes too busy to change soaked pajamas in the middle of the night.
The little boy didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him but one thing he did know for sure – Jesus was with him! He told his nurses about Jesus and even told one that he wasn’t afraid to die because Jesus was in his heart.
The little boy’s room soon filled up with cards, balloons and toys and tons of crayons. His Sunday school teacher visited, his Dad and brother came every evening but at 8:00 pm it was time to say goodnight. The hospital would get quieter as visitors left, but Jesus never left.
One day the neurosurgeons met with the little boy’s parents and told them that they had to perform a very risky surgical procedure. The morning of the surgery the little boy’s Mom and Dad were in his room praying with him then the OR team came to take him away. They kissed and said their goodbye’s knowing that their next meeting may be in heaven.
Ten hours later, the little boy woke up in the ICU with his head covered in bandages and sutures. The 8 hours of brain surgery had not gone well or brought the desired results. The surgeon told his parents that their little boy may never walk again because the neurological damage was so bad and permanent. They should consider placing him in a special facility for crippled children.
The little boy decided that life in a wheelchair was not going to be an option. He knew that Jesus could heal him. He went through grueling therapy and slowly learned to weight- bear and walk again. He had to be homeschooled for a while and despite some learning disabilities decided that he was not going to be held back. He would always have some balance problems but learned to ride a bike again and of course – play hockey.
Fast forward – there were more surgeries, and unbelievable rehab and years of ridicule but that little boy grew up. He studied accounting and had a successful career in that field (in a mission hospital!). He married a girl that he had met when they were only 6 years old. They look a lot different today because they just celebrated their 32nd anniversary. They raised two kids who now have their own careers and are serving God. He also knew that God had placed His call upon his life for Pastoral ministry. He devoted his life to the ministry and felt so blessed to be used by God. In 2012, he had to start to slow down a bit because of some neurological complications that began to show up again.
At that time, he started praying about what was next to be done for the Kingdom of God. A vision was birthed in his heart - Patch Ministries!!!
http://www.youthpatchministries.weebly.com/
Guys, that’s my story. I was that little boy.
Today I walk a bit funny and I have limited use of my left hand (I still play a mean keyboard) but in three words – GOD IS AWESOME!
If he can all that for me, he can do it for you.
Be encouraged and walk by faith. And never, ever give up!!!!!!!!!!!
Blessings always,
Pastor Glenn
When he came to, the baseball team had gathered around him. His head hurt and his face was numb. He was sent home and his mother took him to the hospital. He was checked over by the emergency room doctor and x-rays were taken. They were told that nothing was broken and that the swelling would subside in a day or so. The little boy was sent home.
The incident was soon forgotten and life went on. The little boy loved sports, especially street hockey and riding his bike. He also loved music. He played a keyboard and was pretty good at it. Over that summer, the little boy started having dizzy spells, headaches and weakness. Sometimes he would lose his balance for no reason. He would fall off his bike resulting in a lot of skinned knees. He would forget things and sometimes his left hand couldn’t keep up with his right when playing the piano.
In the fall, he was excited about starting the third grade with all his friends. He loved school and someday wanted to be a medical missionary. Trick or treating was going to be really fun that year. On that night, he was out with friends running around the neighborhood collecting lots of goodies. Suddenly the little boy started losing his coordination and he tripped on his costume, tearing it. He was very tired and called it a night. The next day after school he was too exhausted to play street hockey. That evening he started to develop a headache over his right eye. It got so bad he wanted to scream. He became sick to his stomach and the vision in his right eye started fading in and out. What was happening? Thinking he’d over done it with all the trick or treating excitement his parents put him to bed.
At 5:00 am the little boy woke up with horrible nausea. He was blind in his left eye and the left side of his body was limp like a rag doll. He was paralyzed. His parents heard him moaning and rushed him to the hospital. He faded in and out of consciousness. There were lights, doctors and nurses, technicians, tubes, needles, sirens, IV poles, stretchers, flashes, dark, noise, quiet, cold, warm, red, white a mixed blur, then - nothing.
When the little boy opened his eyes, he was so tired he couldn’t lift his head. He was in a big bed. There were curtains around him and blurry lights. There was bandages and gauze from his right ear down the right side of his neck. He recognized whispering voices of his Mom and Dad beside him. They were praying for him.
Their little boy was in the Neurological Intensive Care Unit at the world-renowned Hospital for Sick Children after suffering a massive stroke. He had a blood clot in an artery leading to his brain and had just undergone emergency surgery. One of the most prominent pediatric neuro surgeons in the world was attending their little son and was gently preparing them for the worst. Death was imminent.
Hours in the ICU blurred into days for the little boy. He was then moved to the neurosurgical ward. He was paralyzed but more aware of his surroundings. The kid in the next bed was Joey. Joey had a brain tumor the size of a lemon. He would scream and cry all night and moan all day. The little boy would pray for him but Joey died on the operating table in a few days. The next roommate was in the same condition. The ward was filled with little kids with tumors, brain hemorrhages and aneurysms. The little boy’s Mom would visit him every day. Sometimes she would put him in a wheelchair and push him through the hallways of little faces full of shaved heads, sunken eyes in their dark sockets staring back. It was a living nightmare. The sights and smells beyond description. The little boy was afraid to make any friends on the ward because friends seemed to die almost as fast as you made them. Every day, an endless routine of needles, tests and scans. Some under anesthesia with days of nausea and recovery. Nights of convulsions, fevers and lying in a wet bed for hours when overworked nurses were sometimes too busy to change soaked pajamas in the middle of the night.
The little boy didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him but one thing he did know for sure – Jesus was with him! He told his nurses about Jesus and even told one that he wasn’t afraid to die because Jesus was in his heart.
The little boy’s room soon filled up with cards, balloons and toys and tons of crayons. His Sunday school teacher visited, his Dad and brother came every evening but at 8:00 pm it was time to say goodnight. The hospital would get quieter as visitors left, but Jesus never left.
One day the neurosurgeons met with the little boy’s parents and told them that they had to perform a very risky surgical procedure. The morning of the surgery the little boy’s Mom and Dad were in his room praying with him then the OR team came to take him away. They kissed and said their goodbye’s knowing that their next meeting may be in heaven.
Ten hours later, the little boy woke up in the ICU with his head covered in bandages and sutures. The 8 hours of brain surgery had not gone well or brought the desired results. The surgeon told his parents that their little boy may never walk again because the neurological damage was so bad and permanent. They should consider placing him in a special facility for crippled children.
The little boy decided that life in a wheelchair was not going to be an option. He knew that Jesus could heal him. He went through grueling therapy and slowly learned to weight- bear and walk again. He had to be homeschooled for a while and despite some learning disabilities decided that he was not going to be held back. He would always have some balance problems but learned to ride a bike again and of course – play hockey.
Fast forward – there were more surgeries, and unbelievable rehab and years of ridicule but that little boy grew up. He studied accounting and had a successful career in that field (in a mission hospital!). He married a girl that he had met when they were only 6 years old. They look a lot different today because they just celebrated their 32nd anniversary. They raised two kids who now have their own careers and are serving God. He also knew that God had placed His call upon his life for Pastoral ministry. He devoted his life to the ministry and felt so blessed to be used by God. In 2012, he had to start to slow down a bit because of some neurological complications that began to show up again.
At that time, he started praying about what was next to be done for the Kingdom of God. A vision was birthed in his heart - Patch Ministries!!!
http://www.youthpatchministries.weebly.com/
Guys, that’s my story. I was that little boy.
Today I walk a bit funny and I have limited use of my left hand (I still play a mean keyboard) but in three words – GOD IS AWESOME!
If he can all that for me, he can do it for you.
Be encouraged and walk by faith. And never, ever give up!!!!!!!!!!!
Blessings always,
Pastor Glenn
I am writing because I am so incredibly insane. I'm writing for the teenagers and kids and adults out there who want to know that life will have a happy ending. I want to tell them to stop hoping for a happy ending. Possibly the biggest pet peeve of mine is when a story ends with "And they lived happily ever after". Grammatically I question what this sentence is even attempting to say. What is ever after? How long is that? Forever? The authors of these stories know that one isn't ever always happy and those that are liars. Personally I could care less about having a happy ending. Who even wants a happy ending anyway? That's the end, you have no time to enjoy that happiness and I think the problem with our world today is that people are chasing a happy ending without realizing that it's the end so who even cares. Personally I'd rather have a happy middle, but I know that I won't always be happy and I've accepted the fact because there is nothing we can do to change the fact that there is misery in life. Our lives are happy moments stitched together with the pain we cannot escape. Which is why whenever someone asks me for advice or is complaining about their troubles I try my hardest to understand because I do it too but the honest truth is that our lives may not always get better. What someone is struggling with now very well may be what they struggle with forever.
Life doesn't promise to get better, but we can have hope that God is sovereign and that He's still there. Our pain will somehow bring glory to God. It's the ultimate bliss, glorifying God is inevitably my entire purpose in life. You see, we have our stories, our testimonies that God uses for his will. Some people think that their testimonies are small, unexciting, boring. But the truth is, every testimony is intense, full of truth, full of that pain that makes a story interesting and our testimonies are among the few stories that truly have a happy ending. I don't understand how someone could say that they have a boring life or an ineffective testimony. Right after we are born we are dead. We are born dead in our sins. But God with His awesome power and His mercy and His grace died for us and brought us to life in His son’s name. Because of this gift of life we are given we have the happy ending of Gods victory and our eternal life and salvation. Our testimonies are always changing, but the big picture is the same. We still live our lives and we still mess up. We still go through struggles, these things are inevitable. But God stays the same, and His love for us is still infinite and He still saves. And so whatever you're going through, know that even if no one else loves you, if you are completely alone in the world, God still loves you.
Growing up in church, I heard God loves you or Jesus loves you practically every day. So much so that it seems cliché to say, “OH, Jesus loves you," Sometimes we just assume that everyone know this. And that's probably because we hear it so often as Christians. Maybe were telling the wrong people. There are billions of people on Earth. People from every nation and tongue. And how many of these people haven't heard that Jesus loves them? Maybe these millions of people haven't heard that Jesus loves them because as a body of Christ, we're spending so much time encouraging Christians and not trying to save the lives of those who haven't heard the good news of Jesus who are right now doomed to Hell. It sounds intense because it is. We are all dying. We are, and those of us who don't fear death because of the cross are surrounded by our friends who are someday going to die. It may not be up to us to save people, but it's up to us to be used. God is calling us. If you are a Christian, you are called to be on mission. We have this gift from God that everyone else in the world can have so why wouldn't we want to share that? Instead of being on our mountain tops and our Christian bubbles, let's go to the valleys, let's go to our market places and be a missionary not just around the world but to our friends and neighbors because they need us. And let's not just be a missionary to our friends and neighbors where were comfortable, but let's go to the ends of the earth and make disciples of all nations. Let's sacrifice our familiarity and go somewhere God is calling us.
The one thing I did not take into consideration while writing before is not just how God looks at us, but how we look at ourselves. I am literally the most hypocritical person when I talk about how we have to have confidence in who we are.
Because frankly, I have next to none.
My whole entire life I've been looked down upon, demeaned. I've been called weak and scrawny and stupid and terrible names I will not repeat in hopes to protect ones innocence. I also blame myself for what people say to me. Everything is my fault and I've no way to get rid of the guilt on my own. Being as immensely independent as I am, I refuse to ask for help from anyone. But nothing anyone has ever said to me can compare to how viciously and terribly I castigate myself.
No, I did not tell you this because I want you to feel sorry for me. However it may sound, this isn't my pity party. I'm saying this because I know there are people out there going through the same thing as I did, people just getting out of it. People who feel alone. Maybe you have it worse, you probably do, I have a way of thinking my problems are more than they actually are. But no matter where you are, I want you to know that you are beautiful. Not in some cliché "Everybody’s beautiful in their own way" "You're perfect just the way you are" because that's not even helpful. Or at least that's not helpful to me. I'm going straight to the source here. Nothing I say could possibly help you. I'm a fifteen year old girl, I don't know what I'm talking about. But God- yeah, He knows.
Recently I've been reading through Isaiah, and let me tell you, it has been a journey. This book is full of Gods glory, His redeeming love, His wrath, His mercy and His holiness. Just a few minutes ago, I read Isaiah 41-44, and I had a major boost to my self-confidence. So if this doesn't help you, it helped me, and that's worth saying at least. Isaiah 43:1 says "But now, this is what The Lord says- he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you O Israel; Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine" Listen, God created us. God created you. You know, that perfect, awesome, wonderful amazing, God who created the stars and the universe and the oceans and everything in between, He created you too. Think about how beautiful God is, you can't, right? Because He's so perfect and wonderful, you can't even describe Him. And guess what? Us, us puny little people, we were created in His image. And in light of this, how can we say we aren't wonderful too? Still don't believe me? Well, I still have more for you. Isaiah 44:2- "This is what The Lord says- he who made you, who formed you in the womb, and will help you: Do not be afraid, O Jacob, my servant Jeshurun, whom I have chosen" God personally formed us, how awesome is that?! "Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you and people in exchange for your life... Bring my sons from afar, and my daughters from the ends of the Earth, everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made," (Isaiah 43:4, 6-7" God loves us so much. Infinitely so, His love endures. His loves strengthens, it redeems, purifies, saves, beautifies. He does so much for us, so instead of seeing ourselves as something less, how about we see ourselves as children of the one true God? The God of Israel, the God who sent his only son to die for us, so that we might be saved and adopted into his family? Rejoice! Let us not be downcast by our own hand! Let us rejoice and have gladness- God has chosen us and He loves us! There's nothing that can compare than being used by God, so let's start acting like we are Gods chosen people. Let's start believing in Him and His truths, so that we may be who he created us to be.
There's a lot of things I could say. Something wise or life changing, but wisdom comes from experience, and I don't have a lot of that. But wisdom also comes from God, and though I have Him, so do you, hopefully, and I know that whatever you could ask of me you can ask of him too. He can help you more than me. All I can really hope is that he used me to help someone, that's all. And while I know that there will be other posts like this, other people to say the same things, I hope that maybe, just maybe, I was a little different than the rest. That maybe, God spoke to someone through my words, because that's all I want in life, to show his love through my own life. And once we know that our purpose in life is solely glorifying God, other worries seem to fade away, because we can always glorify him. No matter what, he's still there and he still deserves our praise. So knowing that, what can we do to glorify him more? And with that, I bid you farewell for now.
Love always, and still gracefully not perfect,
Katie
Hi to all,
I would like to tell you how I learned that heathen friends can have a bad influence on you and may lead you into temptation. In September this year I went on a class trip to Berlin. I am in grade ten and, as most of you know, it is not so easy to be a light in this evil world. One of my class mates is a Christian and her father is a missionary. She was brought up with the Bible and often told me that she will never drink any alcohol. One evening some of the guys bought some beer, and even vodka, and they started to convince us to drink as well. First my friend said "no thanks" but after a while she gave in to the temptation. I told her not to do this but she even asked again for the vodka bottle. This was a complete shock to me and I felt so sorry for her. I then thought of a story which my Mum told me when I was younger. You may read the story further down for yourself and I hope it will help you to overcome next time there may be some so called "friends" inviting you for party or any other kind of worldly pleasure.
"For a day in thy courts is better than a thousand. I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness." PSALM 84:10
Good and Bad Apples
One day Robert's father saw him playing with some bad boys. He had observed for some time a change for the worse in his son, and now he knew the cause. He was very sorry, but said nothing to Robert at the time.
In the evening he brought six beautiful apples from the garden, put them on a plate, and gave them Robert who thanked him. "You must lay them aside for a few days, that they may become mellow," said the father. Robert cheerfully placed the plate with the apples in his mother's store-room.
Just as he was putting them away, his father laid on the plate a seventh apple, which was quite rotten, and he desired Robert to let it remain there.
"Father," said Robert, "the rotten apple will spoil all the others." "Do you think so? Why should not the sound apples rather make the bad one sound?" said his father. With these words he shut the door of the room.
Eight days afterward he asked his son to open the door and take out the apples. But what a sight there was! The six apples, which had been so sound and good, spread a bad smell through the room. "O father!" cried Robert, "did I not tell you that the rotten apple would spoil the good ones?"
"My boy," said his father, "have I not often told you that the company of bad children will make you bad? Yet you do not listen to me. I want you to learn a lesson from these apples. If you keep company with wicked boys, you will soon be like them."
Robert did not forget the lesson. When any of his former friends asked him to join in their games, he thought of the rotten apples, and refused to play with them.
I would like to tell you how I learned that heathen friends can have a bad influence on you and may lead you into temptation. In September this year I went on a class trip to Berlin. I am in grade ten and, as most of you know, it is not so easy to be a light in this evil world. One of my class mates is a Christian and her father is a missionary. She was brought up with the Bible and often told me that she will never drink any alcohol. One evening some of the guys bought some beer, and even vodka, and they started to convince us to drink as well. First my friend said "no thanks" but after a while she gave in to the temptation. I told her not to do this but she even asked again for the vodka bottle. This was a complete shock to me and I felt so sorry for her. I then thought of a story which my Mum told me when I was younger. You may read the story further down for yourself and I hope it will help you to overcome next time there may be some so called "friends" inviting you for party or any other kind of worldly pleasure.
"For a day in thy courts is better than a thousand. I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness." PSALM 84:10
Good and Bad Apples
One day Robert's father saw him playing with some bad boys. He had observed for some time a change for the worse in his son, and now he knew the cause. He was very sorry, but said nothing to Robert at the time.
In the evening he brought six beautiful apples from the garden, put them on a plate, and gave them Robert who thanked him. "You must lay them aside for a few days, that they may become mellow," said the father. Robert cheerfully placed the plate with the apples in his mother's store-room.
Just as he was putting them away, his father laid on the plate a seventh apple, which was quite rotten, and he desired Robert to let it remain there.
"Father," said Robert, "the rotten apple will spoil all the others." "Do you think so? Why should not the sound apples rather make the bad one sound?" said his father. With these words he shut the door of the room.
Eight days afterward he asked his son to open the door and take out the apples. But what a sight there was! The six apples, which had been so sound and good, spread a bad smell through the room. "O father!" cried Robert, "did I not tell you that the rotten apple would spoil the good ones?"
"My boy," said his father, "have I not often told you that the company of bad children will make you bad? Yet you do not listen to me. I want you to learn a lesson from these apples. If you keep company with wicked boys, you will soon be like them."
Robert did not forget the lesson. When any of his former friends asked him to join in their games, he thought of the rotten apples, and refused to play with them.
People going through tough times often wonder, Why is God letting me go through this? Is there a point? That was me in seventh grade. At the time, I thought it was the worst year of my life. Anybody who knows me has heard me say that. But now I know better.
Without that year, I would not be who I am today.
I am a missionary kid (or MK). I have lived in the Czech Republic, the second most atheistic nation in the world, since I was 4-years-old. I'm naturally shy so it's tough for me to make friends. But to make matters worse, I was growing up in a foreign country, where I didn't fully know the language and where every kid I met thought Christianity was the dumbest thing on the planet. Let's just say I felt like there was no hope for a close friend.
And then it all got worse. We moved to California for a year before returning to the Czech Republic. I had no idea what living in America was like, and now I had to attend seventh grade there. Sure, I'd been to America once during our missionary service. But it was for four months. Now, I was going to go to school there. I had no idea what Abercrombie was, who Rihanna was, or even how to relate to American kids.
I knew from the very first day at school that things were very different from the Czech schools. People talked differently, dressed differently, acted differently, and even thought differently. I did not fit in, and I didn't know how to fix that. I was doomed to be the class outcast, the weirdo of seventh grade. And I was. The many insults that I received hurt deeply.
I had been taught all my life about God and Christianity. But before my seventh grade year, God was kinda just there—not really doing anything. He was like wallpaper. But now, I was broken. I was spiritually hungry and thirsty. I thought that if God couldn't help me, no one could. One day, I opened my Bible and Psalm 31 stared back at me: "For I hear the slander of many; there is terror on every side; they conspire against me and plot to take my life. But I trust in you, O Lord. … In the shelter of your presence you hide [those who fear you]; in your dwelling you keep them safe from accusing tongues. … You heard my cry for mercy when I called to you for help" (NIV).
I knew it was no coincidence my Bible fell open to this psalm. I devoured the passage and literally felt a hunger for more. Through his Word, God showed me that I was not alone, and that I just had to trust in him to make the best of it. When I gave him my whole heart, my life opened up. He gave me joy for each new day. He helped me find a few friends around the school and taught me how to let him be my Best Friend. He gave me many opportunities to live out the instruction to turn the other cheek. Life was still very hard. I still cried myself to sleep a lot. Some of what the kids at school said still wounded me badly. But, still, things were different.
I knew that God had a plan, that he had a reason for all the pain and strife I was going through. I didn't know what he was planning, but who am I to argue with the God of the Universe? I couldn't see it then, but as I look back now, God has revealed how he used me that year. For instance, there were several students in my class who came from a different country or whom nobody liked. I realize that, with my experience with living in a different culture and being the social outcast, I was the ideal person to reach out and relate to them.
I noticed lessons of that year when we moved back to Czech. I began eighth grade in yet another new school and I had to make new friends all over again. In America, I'd learned how to stand up for myself, how to make a good yet truthful impression, how to laugh at my mistakes, and how to overcome most of my shyness.
Needless to say, I had a very enjoyable eighth grade year. Since then, too, my life has been much more rewarding. With less shyness, I have been able to act in my school's plays and participate in more group activities. God has blessed me with close friends who encourage and strengthen me. He has shown me how to be a better friend.
Most importantly, he used that year to draw me closer to him. I could have never imagined this relationship with him two years ago. God surely used the bad for good. James says, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance" (James 1:2-3, NIV).
Jessica
Restoration
by A CHILD OF GOD
I have been a Christian since I was a young girl and have always been alive to the word and power in our Lord Jesus Christ. The devil brought in discouragement at a point in my life, but he forgot that I know nothing can separate me from the love of God.
I was down to my last spiritual and emotional strength. Things were not working well for me. I cried, fasted, prayed, endured shameful incidents…but many are the afflictions of God’s children. By His grace I am standing; not because something has happened to change the tide, but because God’s grace has been sufficient for me and as such, he has given me victory. I fall yet I have risen because I am a living witness of God’s faithfully. I have peace.
Are you going through sickness, financial struggles, any form of barrenness, be it spiritual and physical or any other challenge? Hold on to God! Don’t go back to the world. Continue to be diligent in your service to God and he will give you victory and peace.
- Kelly
by A CHILD OF GOD
I have been a Christian since I was a young girl and have always been alive to the word and power in our Lord Jesus Christ. The devil brought in discouragement at a point in my life, but he forgot that I know nothing can separate me from the love of God.
I was down to my last spiritual and emotional strength. Things were not working well for me. I cried, fasted, prayed, endured shameful incidents…but many are the afflictions of God’s children. By His grace I am standing; not because something has happened to change the tide, but because God’s grace has been sufficient for me and as such, he has given me victory. I fall yet I have risen because I am a living witness of God’s faithfully. I have peace.
Are you going through sickness, financial struggles, any form of barrenness, be it spiritual and physical or any other challenge? Hold on to God! Don’t go back to the world. Continue to be diligent in your service to God and he will give you victory and peace.
- Kelly
My story as a young boy growing up in a Christian home where my dad was even a pastor, I had the perfect background and family to become a strong Christian man. People would see me and I was the perfect example of a Sunday morning Christian! People think that being a PK (pastor’s kid) then I must be little perfect Christian. Well truth was I was really good at playing the part for my church and family but outside of there, I was really messed up inside. When I was 12 (I think), everything seemed to be going wrong -Christmas Eve, my dad ended up in the hospital after having a severe heart attack and almost lost his life. A few months later my grandpa died. The worst part of this was that he lived far away and my aunt decided not to tell us until a week after his funeral. This meant I had a lot of anger built up against her. The next Christmas came around and Christmas day, a man who I had known all my life who was basically a second father to me died of a rare heart disease. I had so much anger built up inside against God after all of this, I wanted nothing to do with him. I never told anyone this though and I hid all of my feelings inside. I still went to church with my parents and was pretty involved in my youth group but it never really meant anything to me. It was all just a big show. This all went on for a couple years. My freshman year in high school, I went to a youth conference with a few friends of mine. We didnt go with a youth group or anything just the 4 of us so we got to do as we wanted. That weekend changed my life forever. While I was there, it basically felt like God took a hammer and wacked me across the head. I experienced God like I never had before! That night I went to the hotel room and I went into the bathroom and collapsed on the floor crying my eyes and and crying out to God. I didnt want to be full of anger and hate anymore. I wanted to be full of Him and that night God’s presence filled me with his Holy Spirit! Now obviously since then, things have been far from perfect but now that I have God in my life, I know I never have to go through any more trials or problems in my life alone and it has made all the difference! J.D. |
|
Healed from Sexual Abuse.
I grew up in what you would call a very "churchy" environment when I was young. From about age 1-7 I was taken care of, a good amount of time, by my grandparents. My mother worked very hard to make ends meet. She worked all the time. My grandparents are Christians and they always taught my sister and I to pray and go to church.
My father was abusive and after many beatings my mom finally decided to get a divorce.Though I don't know alot of the abusive situations she experienced I'm finding out more as I get older. I was abused by my father also, sexually. I was about 4 and it went on for about a year. I believe for a few years of my life I blocked it out, not even remembering it untill about third grade. That is when my grades started dropping and I became confused. Not knowing who to turn to because I felt like I was the only one in the world that could have been through something like this I turned to silence about it.
I finally told my best friend at about the age of 15. I thought maybe she would tell my mom because I couldn't,but because I told her not to tell anyone when I told her, she didn't. I think it was a cry for help turning to the only person I trusted. This had me bound for years. And honestly I didn't think that it was a "big deal". Not knowing all the while it was shaping who I was, how I acted and who I trusted.
I moved away with my mom and stepdad, and began growing up. Trying the whole smoking cigarettes thing at the age of 10. I smoked untill I was 19. I smoked weed off and on untill about 18. Drinking became a regular thing for weekends.
About 2 1/2 years ago I was in a relationship with a guy. He was and still is a great person. I was again trying to find someone to trust and feel safe with. He was that for me for a while. I found myself putting my life in to that relationship. Every waking moment was about us. We had sex many times and everytime it occured I felt worse and worse. One day I got a phone call from my boyfriend and after about an hour of talking he told me he didn't think he could felt the same anymore and broke up with me. I was devastated.I didn't eat ot talk. I felt like my life was over.
Feeling like I could literally die. My best friend started talking to me about Jesus. I was always the one telling her about Jesus and felt like I knew more about Him than she did. The difference was she KNEW HIM. I just knew ABOUT Him. She had trusted her life to Jesus about about 6 months before I broke up with my boyfriend. As I felt this pull inside me to trust Him I didn't know how. I knew that I needed something to happen or I didn't know what I was going to do.
I finally couldn't go on bearing all my pain and asked Jesus to help me. I asked Him into my heart. And from then on ….things got alot better. I finally knew that I had someone that loved me and that I could trust. He amazes me more and more with how much He actually loves me and how He is healing me of past pain. I have hope now and know no matter what happens I have someone that will never leave me or forsake me. I am now in a bible study called "Breaking Free". It is helping me to know God's love and helping me to trust Him as my Heavenly Father. And to know that He would never do anything to hurt me. I have true direction in my life and am excited about my future.My certain future.
Thank you for reading …my life =0)
I pray it helps anyone that has been hurt to know that God cares more than you know.
Matthew 11:28-30
In His Name,
Cori McDaris
I grew up in what you would call a very "churchy" environment when I was young. From about age 1-7 I was taken care of, a good amount of time, by my grandparents. My mother worked very hard to make ends meet. She worked all the time. My grandparents are Christians and they always taught my sister and I to pray and go to church.
My father was abusive and after many beatings my mom finally decided to get a divorce.Though I don't know alot of the abusive situations she experienced I'm finding out more as I get older. I was abused by my father also, sexually. I was about 4 and it went on for about a year. I believe for a few years of my life I blocked it out, not even remembering it untill about third grade. That is when my grades started dropping and I became confused. Not knowing who to turn to because I felt like I was the only one in the world that could have been through something like this I turned to silence about it.
I finally told my best friend at about the age of 15. I thought maybe she would tell my mom because I couldn't,but because I told her not to tell anyone when I told her, she didn't. I think it was a cry for help turning to the only person I trusted. This had me bound for years. And honestly I didn't think that it was a "big deal". Not knowing all the while it was shaping who I was, how I acted and who I trusted.
I moved away with my mom and stepdad, and began growing up. Trying the whole smoking cigarettes thing at the age of 10. I smoked untill I was 19. I smoked weed off and on untill about 18. Drinking became a regular thing for weekends.
About 2 1/2 years ago I was in a relationship with a guy. He was and still is a great person. I was again trying to find someone to trust and feel safe with. He was that for me for a while. I found myself putting my life in to that relationship. Every waking moment was about us. We had sex many times and everytime it occured I felt worse and worse. One day I got a phone call from my boyfriend and after about an hour of talking he told me he didn't think he could felt the same anymore and broke up with me. I was devastated.I didn't eat ot talk. I felt like my life was over.
Feeling like I could literally die. My best friend started talking to me about Jesus. I was always the one telling her about Jesus and felt like I knew more about Him than she did. The difference was she KNEW HIM. I just knew ABOUT Him. She had trusted her life to Jesus about about 6 months before I broke up with my boyfriend. As I felt this pull inside me to trust Him I didn't know how. I knew that I needed something to happen or I didn't know what I was going to do.
I finally couldn't go on bearing all my pain and asked Jesus to help me. I asked Him into my heart. And from then on ….things got alot better. I finally knew that I had someone that loved me and that I could trust. He amazes me more and more with how much He actually loves me and how He is healing me of past pain. I have hope now and know no matter what happens I have someone that will never leave me or forsake me. I am now in a bible study called "Breaking Free". It is helping me to know God's love and helping me to trust Him as my Heavenly Father. And to know that He would never do anything to hurt me. I have true direction in my life and am excited about my future.My certain future.
Thank you for reading …my life =0)
I pray it helps anyone that has been hurt to know that God cares more than you know.
Matthew 11:28-30
In His Name,
Cori McDaris
I was raised in church and at the age of three, I received the Holy Ghost. I was baptized when I was four in the name of Jesus after I explained to my pastor why I wanted to be baptized and was able to tell him the steps of salvation. I had a real love for God deep in my heart.
As I got older, life changed, as it always seems to do. My sister got married and moved to California for good when I was thirteen. That same year, I started junior high at a really rough school. I know you all think, “How could a school in Wisconsin be rough?” But, it was. It was a really small school, about 500 people including the staff, but there still were the guns, the drugs, the gangs, everything. I watched one of my friends get his head kicked in on the front steps before school one morning. Another one of my friends had two kids by the time she was 14.
During this time, my parents started having problems. They tried to be there for me, but they had their own problems to worry about, and I started shutting them out of my life. Unfortunately, instead of turning to God as my refuge during these times, I turned to guys instead. I still loved God, but guys became more important to me than what He was.
In my high school years, my spiritual walk had its ups and downs. God would send me wake up calls and I would straighten out my life, and live for Him for a while, but then I would get distracted. Growing up in church, I always wondered about what the world had to offer. I never had the chance to experience the things of this world or to decide for myself to live for God. As I got older, I wanted to try it all for myself, instead of taking someone else’s word for what it was really like. I didn’t like high school, but I was a good student, so I graduated early and started college. College was like a breath of fresh air. I was no longer ridiculed for not wearing pants, not cutting my hair, or not partying on the weekends. People accepted me just as I was. It was great!
With every mountain, there’s also a valley. Me and my parents were not getting along very well, because I was tired of them fighting with each other and with me. I went to live with my mom’s friend, Marilyn for a while. It was while I was living with her that he started coming to church. I had known him since I was fifteen and when he asked me on a date, I was ecstatic! It wasn’t long before we were a couple. Everything was great, with the exception of the things like my parents didn’t want me to be with him and my pastor said I shouldn’t date him. But, what did they know? I thought he was different now; that he was going to live right. I was still reading my Bible at this point, but it started convicting me for being with him, so I quit reading it. And praying, that convicted me too, so I quit doing that.
My parents had me move back home to try and have more control over what I was doing. This just made me hate being home even more. My parents and I fought all the time.
My boyfriend had told me that he would always be there for me, but instead of being there for me, he started doing drugs again. I knew I should break up with him, but since that’s what my parents wanted, I stayed with him. I was so rebellious that I wasn’t about to listen to what anybody would try to tell me, especially if it was anything against him. I would do the opposite of whatever my parents wanted me to do. I was tired of fighting with my parents, so I would wait until I knew that they were sleeping, and then go home. I also started drinking to try and escape what my life was becoming. I was putting my parents through so much, but it was only just beginning.
My parents decided to move to Mississippi to work at the Children’s Mansion. So, I moved in with my boyfriend. My pastor warned me that doing this was going to be like stepping off the edge of a cliff. He begged me not to, but I still wouldn’t listen. I had no idea how right he would be.
My boyfriend lost his job, and we didn’t have enough money for rent, so he started dealing coke. It wasn’t long before I was hooked. My days consisted of going to work, coming home, doing coke, drinking, making drug runs and sometimes going out partying in the middle of the night. I got more death threats than I want to remember, but I didn’t care anymore. I didn’t even care whether I lived or died.
I quit going to church. If my best friend could get me to go to church, I would only go if I were high. I was so miserable, but I had so much anger and I didn’t want God to be able to reach me.
My parents came up to Wisconsin to finish signing papers for the house they sold, and they took me out to dinner. They offered me a second chance. If I would leave Wisconsin and live with them, they would pay for me to finish college and get me a new car. The part of the deal that really got me to consider this was they would fly me to California to see my niece after she was born. I told them I would think about it and get back to them. I didn’t think I would ever go, but people were praying for me.
The night before my neice, Caitlin, was born, I went to church sober, and God touched me. I prayed for the first time in I don’t know how long. I called my sister that night and told her that I had given my life back to God so she could have my niece now. Caitlin was born the next day.
I learned the hard way that when God touches you like that, you need to get out of the sin you’re living in. I went back home that night, and without thinking, when I was offered drugs, I did them out of habit. But when I realized what I had just done, I felt horrible and knew that I had to quit.
Things where I was living got worse than they already were and I wanted out. I finally let my boyfriend make the choice about whether I should leave or not. I told him it was the drugs or it was me. He chose the drugs. I called my parents and told them I wanted to take them up on their offer.
I flew with my grandma to California to see my baby niece, and was she ever cute! From there we flew down to Louisiana to my uncle’s house. I was still so angry and scared about living with my parent’s again. I decided to forget about it all, so I went out drinking with my cousin every night, until the thought of drinking was repulsive to me. My parents picked my grandma and I up from there and brought us to Mississippi.
Things didn’t work out for me to live with my parents, so they told me I could either go live in Louisiana with my uncle, or live in California with my sister. I knew that some day I would want to get back in church if God could ever want me, so I picked California.
God sometimes answers people’s prayers in ways they could never imagine. I had such a wall up around my heart that it would be hard for almost anyone to reach me. However, God sent along the person that could. A couple nights before I was going to leave Mississippi, I met a guy who asked me to go on a date. I figured I might as well have some fun as long as I was down there, so I agreed. As it turns out, he was a hit man. Somehow we got on the subject of God, and I told him that I didn’t think God could ever love me again after all that I had done. He told me that God still loved me. It’s pretty ironic that the person God put in my life to tell me that was someone who wanted absolutely nothing to do with God or church. However, those words started cracking the ice surrounding my heart.
I moved to California to live with my sister. I took care of my niece while my sister and brother-in-law worked, and I went to school at night. I went to church out of respect to them, but it still took me a while before I wanted to change and let go of all the anger in my heart. But feeling the presence of God and the peace again gave me a longing for what I was missing. The night I remember most vividly was when there was a move of God in the service. I saw Bro. Michael (who is now my boyfriend) praising God with this huge smile on his face. I said, “God, I want joy like that.” I finally started wanting to change, but I wanted it to be real. I told God, “I don’t want something that’s based on emotion, I need something that’s real. If you’re willing to forgive me, take me back, and give me another chance, I need you to change me completely.” And, He did.
I’m not saying that I’m perfect now, but I’m finally on the right road. I am now serving God with my whole heart and I’ve never been happier. God has blessed my life more than I could have ever imagined. There is nothing that can replace the love of God. Always remember, no matter what you’ve done, God loves you.
Kim
As I got older, life changed, as it always seems to do. My sister got married and moved to California for good when I was thirteen. That same year, I started junior high at a really rough school. I know you all think, “How could a school in Wisconsin be rough?” But, it was. It was a really small school, about 500 people including the staff, but there still were the guns, the drugs, the gangs, everything. I watched one of my friends get his head kicked in on the front steps before school one morning. Another one of my friends had two kids by the time she was 14.
During this time, my parents started having problems. They tried to be there for me, but they had their own problems to worry about, and I started shutting them out of my life. Unfortunately, instead of turning to God as my refuge during these times, I turned to guys instead. I still loved God, but guys became more important to me than what He was.
In my high school years, my spiritual walk had its ups and downs. God would send me wake up calls and I would straighten out my life, and live for Him for a while, but then I would get distracted. Growing up in church, I always wondered about what the world had to offer. I never had the chance to experience the things of this world or to decide for myself to live for God. As I got older, I wanted to try it all for myself, instead of taking someone else’s word for what it was really like. I didn’t like high school, but I was a good student, so I graduated early and started college. College was like a breath of fresh air. I was no longer ridiculed for not wearing pants, not cutting my hair, or not partying on the weekends. People accepted me just as I was. It was great!
With every mountain, there’s also a valley. Me and my parents were not getting along very well, because I was tired of them fighting with each other and with me. I went to live with my mom’s friend, Marilyn for a while. It was while I was living with her that he started coming to church. I had known him since I was fifteen and when he asked me on a date, I was ecstatic! It wasn’t long before we were a couple. Everything was great, with the exception of the things like my parents didn’t want me to be with him and my pastor said I shouldn’t date him. But, what did they know? I thought he was different now; that he was going to live right. I was still reading my Bible at this point, but it started convicting me for being with him, so I quit reading it. And praying, that convicted me too, so I quit doing that.
My parents had me move back home to try and have more control over what I was doing. This just made me hate being home even more. My parents and I fought all the time.
My boyfriend had told me that he would always be there for me, but instead of being there for me, he started doing drugs again. I knew I should break up with him, but since that’s what my parents wanted, I stayed with him. I was so rebellious that I wasn’t about to listen to what anybody would try to tell me, especially if it was anything against him. I would do the opposite of whatever my parents wanted me to do. I was tired of fighting with my parents, so I would wait until I knew that they were sleeping, and then go home. I also started drinking to try and escape what my life was becoming. I was putting my parents through so much, but it was only just beginning.
My parents decided to move to Mississippi to work at the Children’s Mansion. So, I moved in with my boyfriend. My pastor warned me that doing this was going to be like stepping off the edge of a cliff. He begged me not to, but I still wouldn’t listen. I had no idea how right he would be.
My boyfriend lost his job, and we didn’t have enough money for rent, so he started dealing coke. It wasn’t long before I was hooked. My days consisted of going to work, coming home, doing coke, drinking, making drug runs and sometimes going out partying in the middle of the night. I got more death threats than I want to remember, but I didn’t care anymore. I didn’t even care whether I lived or died.
I quit going to church. If my best friend could get me to go to church, I would only go if I were high. I was so miserable, but I had so much anger and I didn’t want God to be able to reach me.
My parents came up to Wisconsin to finish signing papers for the house they sold, and they took me out to dinner. They offered me a second chance. If I would leave Wisconsin and live with them, they would pay for me to finish college and get me a new car. The part of the deal that really got me to consider this was they would fly me to California to see my niece after she was born. I told them I would think about it and get back to them. I didn’t think I would ever go, but people were praying for me.
The night before my neice, Caitlin, was born, I went to church sober, and God touched me. I prayed for the first time in I don’t know how long. I called my sister that night and told her that I had given my life back to God so she could have my niece now. Caitlin was born the next day.
I learned the hard way that when God touches you like that, you need to get out of the sin you’re living in. I went back home that night, and without thinking, when I was offered drugs, I did them out of habit. But when I realized what I had just done, I felt horrible and knew that I had to quit.
Things where I was living got worse than they already were and I wanted out. I finally let my boyfriend make the choice about whether I should leave or not. I told him it was the drugs or it was me. He chose the drugs. I called my parents and told them I wanted to take them up on their offer.
I flew with my grandma to California to see my baby niece, and was she ever cute! From there we flew down to Louisiana to my uncle’s house. I was still so angry and scared about living with my parent’s again. I decided to forget about it all, so I went out drinking with my cousin every night, until the thought of drinking was repulsive to me. My parents picked my grandma and I up from there and brought us to Mississippi.
Things didn’t work out for me to live with my parents, so they told me I could either go live in Louisiana with my uncle, or live in California with my sister. I knew that some day I would want to get back in church if God could ever want me, so I picked California.
God sometimes answers people’s prayers in ways they could never imagine. I had such a wall up around my heart that it would be hard for almost anyone to reach me. However, God sent along the person that could. A couple nights before I was going to leave Mississippi, I met a guy who asked me to go on a date. I figured I might as well have some fun as long as I was down there, so I agreed. As it turns out, he was a hit man. Somehow we got on the subject of God, and I told him that I didn’t think God could ever love me again after all that I had done. He told me that God still loved me. It’s pretty ironic that the person God put in my life to tell me that was someone who wanted absolutely nothing to do with God or church. However, those words started cracking the ice surrounding my heart.
I moved to California to live with my sister. I took care of my niece while my sister and brother-in-law worked, and I went to school at night. I went to church out of respect to them, but it still took me a while before I wanted to change and let go of all the anger in my heart. But feeling the presence of God and the peace again gave me a longing for what I was missing. The night I remember most vividly was when there was a move of God in the service. I saw Bro. Michael (who is now my boyfriend) praising God with this huge smile on his face. I said, “God, I want joy like that.” I finally started wanting to change, but I wanted it to be real. I told God, “I don’t want something that’s based on emotion, I need something that’s real. If you’re willing to forgive me, take me back, and give me another chance, I need you to change me completely.” And, He did.
I’m not saying that I’m perfect now, but I’m finally on the right road. I am now serving God with my whole heart and I’ve never been happier. God has blessed my life more than I could have ever imagined. There is nothing that can replace the love of God. Always remember, no matter what you’ve done, God loves you.
Kim
June 3, 2014
The past couple of years have been a tough battle for me. I have endured some traumatic experiences that I believe no one should every have to endure. I was raped. When this first happened I started to question and doubt God. I started wondering how and why He would let that happen to me. There were a number of emotional stages I went through and a number of thoughts that went through my head. I struggled with depression for a long time. My self esteem also dropped to an all-time low. Last weekend I had the amazing opportunity to go on a youth retreat with my youth group. It was phenomenal. The worship was fantastic. The speaker was fantastic. There were times when the speaker was talking and I felt he was speaking directly to me because his words related so much to my life. On that Saturday I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. It was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!! I was literally swept of my feet. That weekend I realized a lot of things. One of the things I realized is that the God who created heaven and earth made me. Not only did He make me but when He did He said, "It is good." It took Him 6 days to create the universe but 9 months to make you. I Also realized that weekend that God works everything out for our good. His plans are way better than any plans we could've every dreamt of. I've realized is that whether we know it or not He has a plan for us. I realized that he has my back no matter what. I am writing this testimony to encourage you guys. Yes, we are going to go through trials. Yes, the world is going to bring us down. Yes, we are going to go through traumatic experiences. But I'm here to tell you that with God you can overcome these challenges. You can face the world and say, "I am untouchable. For I am a child of the one true, living God." If you stand firm and put your trust in the Lord great things can happen. Our God is a God that performs GREAT miracles. But you have to put the effort in too. It's a two way street. You have to put your trust in God and stand firm.
The past couple of years have been a tough battle for me. I have endured some traumatic experiences that I believe no one should every have to endure. I was raped. When this first happened I started to question and doubt God. I started wondering how and why He would let that happen to me. There were a number of emotional stages I went through and a number of thoughts that went through my head. I struggled with depression for a long time. My self esteem also dropped to an all-time low. Last weekend I had the amazing opportunity to go on a youth retreat with my youth group. It was phenomenal. The worship was fantastic. The speaker was fantastic. There were times when the speaker was talking and I felt he was speaking directly to me because his words related so much to my life. On that Saturday I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. It was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!! I was literally swept of my feet. That weekend I realized a lot of things. One of the things I realized is that the God who created heaven and earth made me. Not only did He make me but when He did He said, "It is good." It took Him 6 days to create the universe but 9 months to make you. I Also realized that weekend that God works everything out for our good. His plans are way better than any plans we could've every dreamt of. I've realized is that whether we know it or not He has a plan for us. I realized that he has my back no matter what. I am writing this testimony to encourage you guys. Yes, we are going to go through trials. Yes, the world is going to bring us down. Yes, we are going to go through traumatic experiences. But I'm here to tell you that with God you can overcome these challenges. You can face the world and say, "I am untouchable. For I am a child of the one true, living God." If you stand firm and put your trust in the Lord great things can happen. Our God is a God that performs GREAT miracles. But you have to put the effort in too. It's a two way street. You have to put your trust in God and stand firm.
"Why would the lord of all creation love the human race? Why would He choose to
weep for, get angry, and take pleasure in us? If He could blow us from the palm
of His hand?
My dear friend Amanda drew this one concept based on TFK's song "Be
Somebody" and on the line: "I'm just a speck inside Your hand" and... looking
at that drawing, it makes me feel so small... so weak.... so helpless... and
like the only thing I can do is raise my hands up and humble myself to worship
Him... He could flick me off. He could very well KILL me... He could wipe me
clean from existence, but He chooses to take pleasure in that speck in His
hand... I'm so unworthy... so unlovely... so marred by sin... and He hods me in
that palm as if that speck is a most beautiful, most beloved piece of art....
"Even the sparrow finds a home, and the swallow builds her nest and raises
her young at a place near your altar," someone there elaborated on this at
Sunday school... "the most beautiful thing about this picture was that the
Israelites were in captivity in Babylon and so Jerusalem, the only place to
which they could commune with the Lord was far away, and deserted, the altar
gives life, it probably had plants growing in it and the sparrows and swallows
made their nests in there... the altar... where any sacrificial animal would be
slayed... and sparrows and swallows were in that category... and yet the Lord
even let them shelter in His altar...we are a living sacrifice... and we have to
put ourselves back on that altar and get right back up, then come right back..."
Mr. Bob(who was teaching, and also a friend of the family) said, "I was thinking
about the total differences between the two... the sparrow skips about, and the
swallow is swift... which means, to me... any personality has a place in God's
altar..."
I was thinking it's just hard to even have that kind of love.... to have
this fearful, frightening, powerful, yet so loving, yet so humble, yet so kind
King of everything.... love someone like ME! A filth-ridden... adulteress, a
traitor... a cowardly lying sinner... someone who has grieved Him over and
over! And yet, like Hosea.... He comes for this Gomer.... and keeps coming... I
don't deserve it! I don't deserve any of this... and He favors me... all His
children... He chose us... even though we were the poor, the highlanders, the
bandits, the harlots, the murderers... and he invited us to a wedding feast...
and for me, it's too much to take in!"
Ari
weep for, get angry, and take pleasure in us? If He could blow us from the palm
of His hand?
My dear friend Amanda drew this one concept based on TFK's song "Be
Somebody" and on the line: "I'm just a speck inside Your hand" and... looking
at that drawing, it makes me feel so small... so weak.... so helpless... and
like the only thing I can do is raise my hands up and humble myself to worship
Him... He could flick me off. He could very well KILL me... He could wipe me
clean from existence, but He chooses to take pleasure in that speck in His
hand... I'm so unworthy... so unlovely... so marred by sin... and He hods me in
that palm as if that speck is a most beautiful, most beloved piece of art....
"Even the sparrow finds a home, and the swallow builds her nest and raises
her young at a place near your altar," someone there elaborated on this at
Sunday school... "the most beautiful thing about this picture was that the
Israelites were in captivity in Babylon and so Jerusalem, the only place to
which they could commune with the Lord was far away, and deserted, the altar
gives life, it probably had plants growing in it and the sparrows and swallows
made their nests in there... the altar... where any sacrificial animal would be
slayed... and sparrows and swallows were in that category... and yet the Lord
even let them shelter in His altar...we are a living sacrifice... and we have to
put ourselves back on that altar and get right back up, then come right back..."
Mr. Bob(who was teaching, and also a friend of the family) said, "I was thinking
about the total differences between the two... the sparrow skips about, and the
swallow is swift... which means, to me... any personality has a place in God's
altar..."
I was thinking it's just hard to even have that kind of love.... to have
this fearful, frightening, powerful, yet so loving, yet so humble, yet so kind
King of everything.... love someone like ME! A filth-ridden... adulteress, a
traitor... a cowardly lying sinner... someone who has grieved Him over and
over! And yet, like Hosea.... He comes for this Gomer.... and keeps coming... I
don't deserve it! I don't deserve any of this... and He favors me... all His
children... He chose us... even though we were the poor, the highlanders, the
bandits, the harlots, the murderers... and he invited us to a wedding feast...
and for me, it's too much to take in!"
Ari
Always Give Thanks?Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
When bad things happen to me, my first reaction is not to be joyful. I don't feel like giving thanks when I'm hurt by a good friend, or when I fight with my parents or get a bad grade. I feel like saying, "If God really loved me, this wouldn't be happening!"
But then I look at all the ways God has blessed me. God gives me great, amazing gifts all the time, and I hardly ever remember to say, "Thank you." If I paid more attention to praising God and less attention to my problems, I'd be a lot more joyful person. —Chris
When bad things happen to me, my first reaction is not to be joyful. I don't feel like giving thanks when I'm hurt by a good friend, or when I fight with my parents or get a bad grade. I feel like saying, "If God really loved me, this wouldn't be happening!"
But then I look at all the ways God has blessed me. God gives me great, amazing gifts all the time, and I hardly ever remember to say, "Thank you." If I paid more attention to praising God and less attention to my problems, I'd be a lot more joyful person. —Chris
It was a small, stark room, typical for a doctor's office. Jars of cotton balls and Band-Aids sat on the counter. The faded blue and pink striped wallpaper was overpowered by the bright light. The doctor walked in and asked me if I was ready. I nodded as my whole body began to quiver with fear. He flipped a switch and the loud roar of a vacuum filled the room. It was over in a matter of minutes. The doctor threw his gloves away, brushed past me and quietly shut the door. I was left alone, in that glaring white room. I wanted to cry, but the tears just wouldn't come. I didn't know how I was supposed to feel. I had just killed my baby.
Losing My Innocence
When I went off to college, I was pretty naïve. I had never had a boyfriend; I'd never even been kissed.
One day, I ran into an old high school crush. We exchanged numbers and met one night at a friend's house. Her parents were out of town, so it was just the three of us watching a movie. After my friend went to bed, my crush and I started kissing. I liked it. Finally, a guy was paying attention to me! I'd never really felt pretty before, but he made me feel that way. I enjoyed it so much, I invited him into the bedroom.
I didn't want to do anything but kiss; I was a virgin, and wanted to stay that way. But he had a different idea. I told him I didn't want to have sex, and I begged him to stop. He just told me to "relax and enjoy it." I was too embarrassed to call out to my friend. So I gave in.
After it was over, I was sad and a little scared. And I was angry.
I can't believe this guy, I thought. I really liked him and he did this to me!
He stayed the night and left the next morning. I never heard from him again.
The next few days I kept thinking, How could I let him do this to me? Why didn't I scream? Why did I ask him into the bedroom? Even though I didn't mean for it to happen, I couldn't let go of the guilt. I felt like it was all my fault.
I was saving myself for my husband, but that gift is gone, I thought. And there's nothing I can do to get it back.
Out of Control
Since I couldn't change the past, I decided I didn't really care about my future either. I shoved all the feelings of guilt deep inside, and I decided it was time to have some fun.
A couple of weeks later, I met a guy one afternoon and had sex with him that night. I never saw him again, but I just didn't care about that—or about my old standards. My life was spinning out of control.
I started partying all the time. I never went to class. I drank to get drunk. I had a party about every other weekend, and I slept with a bunch of different guys. Since I wasn't a virgin, it didn't seem to matter how often I had sex or who I had it with. All I know is that I felt like I could do anything. I had become popular, and I was having such a great time. I never thought anything bad would happen to me. Not AIDS. Not STDs. Not pregnancy.
After awhile, I started dating Rob (not his real name), a supervisor at the grocery store where I worked. Soon, we were having sex. I really liked him, so I didn't date anyone else for about three months. One night, when Rob wasn't around, I got really drunk at a party and slept with a guy. I usually used protection when I had sex, but not this time. I guess I figured it'd be OK this once.
I never told Rob about that one-night stand. Especially when I was two weeks late for my period. But three pregnancy tests later, there was no denying the truth.
I was pregnant.
I didn't want the baby. I didn't even know who the father was! If it was Rob's baby, I would have considered keeping it. But I didn't want a child from a guy I didn't even know. So I figured I only had one option: Abortion.
I decided to tell Rob. When he asked me if it was his baby, I lied and said yes.
"But you don't have to worry about a thing," I said. "I'll take care of it."
Everybody assured me that an abortion was the right thing to do—especially Rob. He said there was no way we could be parents because we were "too young and irresponsible."
The Day I Want To Forget
The earliest I could get into the abortion clinic was two weeks from the day I called. Those were the hardest two weeks of my life. At night, I'd lie in bed and through my tears, ask my baby to forgive me. I told her she'd be better off in heaven because God could take care of her a lot better than I could. I wrestled with the idea of keeping my baby. But I just couldn't do it. My parents would've been so ashamed of me. And I hadn't even graduated from college yet. I knew I couldn't take care of her.
So I aborted my baby on April 17, 1998. I was eight weeks pregnant.
I was numb for days. Something inside me told me to cry, but I couldn't. I couldn't feel anything. I just kept thinking, Who have I become? I tried not to think about it too much, and a few days later, I was back in bed with Rob.
My baby would have been due that November—something I couldn't get out of my mind during the Thanksgiving holidays. It was all I could think about. I cried a lot. Especially when I saw pregnant women, strollers, baby toys.
The hardest part was that no one knew I was in so much pain. I was angry at Rob because he didn't seem to care. I was mad at my friends who didn't talk me out of having the abortion. I was upset with the doctor who didn't tell me this would be so hard.
I didn't want to go back to school that winter, but I did anyway. In one class, we were discussing a baby's development in the womb. As I looked through pictures, I was overwhelmed with grief and guilt. I realized I needed help.
Flipping through the yellow pages, I found a church that offered Christian counseling. I didn't care who I went to, just as long as they were free. Little did I know my life was about to change.
During one session, my counselor told me about Jesus and his love for me. I didn't understand. I was convinced I had to suffer for the rest of my life for my decision. I didn't think this Jesus, no matter how great he was, could forgive me for killing my baby.
The counselor connected me with a support group for women who'd had abortions. Heidi, the support group's leader, called me a few days later. She told me she'd had an abortion in college. And now, several years after her experience, she was married and had two kids. She told me how God had changed her life, giving her peace and joy. That's what I wanted more than anything.
She invited me to a Bible study with her and some other girls. I was hesitant. I didn't understand the Bible. I didn't want to make a fool of myself. And I didn't want to think about my pregnancy and abortion. It was too hard. But Heidi finally convinced me this would help me heal. So I went, and everyone was so kind, even though most of us were still grieving.
I went back the next week, and the week after that. We talked about forgiveness, shame and guilt. We talked about confessing our sins, accepting God's forgiveness and forgiving ourselves. They told me it was OK to grieve for my baby, even though other people might not think it's normal. Just because it was my choice to have an abortion, didn't change the fact that I'd still lost my baby, and I still had to deal with that loss.
When we met for the last time, we had a memorial service for my baby. Heidi had asked me to name my child. Before I went to counseling, I had a dream that I was walking to my parents' house, holding a little girl in my arms. Because of this dream, I knew my baby was a girl. I named her Chastity Soleil.
The memorial service helped in the healing process, but I still hadn't made the big decision about what I was going to do with Jesus. I wasn't ready to give anyone control of my life. So shortly after I stopped meeting with the Bible study group, I went right back to Rob and my old lifestyle. But it was different this time, because I felt guilty about it.
After struggling with guilt for about six months, I finally broke up with Rob. I started going to church. And I decided I wanted Christ's love in my life, so I asked Jesus into my heart. That was almost two years ago, and I've been walking with God ever since.
Amazed By His Grace
I now lead a Bible study and am actively involved with college students at my church. I haven't dated anyone since Rob. I'm waiting on God's timing. Best of all, I don't deal with overwhelming guilt anymore. Jesus has forgiven me, and I've finally forgiven myself. There are still times that I cry. Especially in April, on the anniversary of my abortion. But I don't cry out of guilt or shame. I just miss the baby I didn't have.
I'll have to live with my decision for the rest of my life. Yes, God forgave me, and because of that, I forgave myself. But some days, I wonder what my life would've been like if I had Chastity Soleil. If I think about it too much, I get sad. So instead, I look forward to God's plans for me. I thank him for his forgiveness, his grace, his healing.
But most of all, I thank him for my daughter. After all, if not for her, I probably would've never met the God who calls me his own precious child.
Amanda
Losing My Innocence
When I went off to college, I was pretty naïve. I had never had a boyfriend; I'd never even been kissed.
One day, I ran into an old high school crush. We exchanged numbers and met one night at a friend's house. Her parents were out of town, so it was just the three of us watching a movie. After my friend went to bed, my crush and I started kissing. I liked it. Finally, a guy was paying attention to me! I'd never really felt pretty before, but he made me feel that way. I enjoyed it so much, I invited him into the bedroom.
I didn't want to do anything but kiss; I was a virgin, and wanted to stay that way. But he had a different idea. I told him I didn't want to have sex, and I begged him to stop. He just told me to "relax and enjoy it." I was too embarrassed to call out to my friend. So I gave in.
After it was over, I was sad and a little scared. And I was angry.
I can't believe this guy, I thought. I really liked him and he did this to me!
He stayed the night and left the next morning. I never heard from him again.
The next few days I kept thinking, How could I let him do this to me? Why didn't I scream? Why did I ask him into the bedroom? Even though I didn't mean for it to happen, I couldn't let go of the guilt. I felt like it was all my fault.
I was saving myself for my husband, but that gift is gone, I thought. And there's nothing I can do to get it back.
Out of Control
Since I couldn't change the past, I decided I didn't really care about my future either. I shoved all the feelings of guilt deep inside, and I decided it was time to have some fun.
A couple of weeks later, I met a guy one afternoon and had sex with him that night. I never saw him again, but I just didn't care about that—or about my old standards. My life was spinning out of control.
I started partying all the time. I never went to class. I drank to get drunk. I had a party about every other weekend, and I slept with a bunch of different guys. Since I wasn't a virgin, it didn't seem to matter how often I had sex or who I had it with. All I know is that I felt like I could do anything. I had become popular, and I was having such a great time. I never thought anything bad would happen to me. Not AIDS. Not STDs. Not pregnancy.
After awhile, I started dating Rob (not his real name), a supervisor at the grocery store where I worked. Soon, we were having sex. I really liked him, so I didn't date anyone else for about three months. One night, when Rob wasn't around, I got really drunk at a party and slept with a guy. I usually used protection when I had sex, but not this time. I guess I figured it'd be OK this once.
I never told Rob about that one-night stand. Especially when I was two weeks late for my period. But three pregnancy tests later, there was no denying the truth.
I was pregnant.
I didn't want the baby. I didn't even know who the father was! If it was Rob's baby, I would have considered keeping it. But I didn't want a child from a guy I didn't even know. So I figured I only had one option: Abortion.
I decided to tell Rob. When he asked me if it was his baby, I lied and said yes.
"But you don't have to worry about a thing," I said. "I'll take care of it."
Everybody assured me that an abortion was the right thing to do—especially Rob. He said there was no way we could be parents because we were "too young and irresponsible."
The Day I Want To Forget
The earliest I could get into the abortion clinic was two weeks from the day I called. Those were the hardest two weeks of my life. At night, I'd lie in bed and through my tears, ask my baby to forgive me. I told her she'd be better off in heaven because God could take care of her a lot better than I could. I wrestled with the idea of keeping my baby. But I just couldn't do it. My parents would've been so ashamed of me. And I hadn't even graduated from college yet. I knew I couldn't take care of her.
So I aborted my baby on April 17, 1998. I was eight weeks pregnant.
I was numb for days. Something inside me told me to cry, but I couldn't. I couldn't feel anything. I just kept thinking, Who have I become? I tried not to think about it too much, and a few days later, I was back in bed with Rob.
My baby would have been due that November—something I couldn't get out of my mind during the Thanksgiving holidays. It was all I could think about. I cried a lot. Especially when I saw pregnant women, strollers, baby toys.
The hardest part was that no one knew I was in so much pain. I was angry at Rob because he didn't seem to care. I was mad at my friends who didn't talk me out of having the abortion. I was upset with the doctor who didn't tell me this would be so hard.
I didn't want to go back to school that winter, but I did anyway. In one class, we were discussing a baby's development in the womb. As I looked through pictures, I was overwhelmed with grief and guilt. I realized I needed help.
Flipping through the yellow pages, I found a church that offered Christian counseling. I didn't care who I went to, just as long as they were free. Little did I know my life was about to change.
During one session, my counselor told me about Jesus and his love for me. I didn't understand. I was convinced I had to suffer for the rest of my life for my decision. I didn't think this Jesus, no matter how great he was, could forgive me for killing my baby.
The counselor connected me with a support group for women who'd had abortions. Heidi, the support group's leader, called me a few days later. She told me she'd had an abortion in college. And now, several years after her experience, she was married and had two kids. She told me how God had changed her life, giving her peace and joy. That's what I wanted more than anything.
She invited me to a Bible study with her and some other girls. I was hesitant. I didn't understand the Bible. I didn't want to make a fool of myself. And I didn't want to think about my pregnancy and abortion. It was too hard. But Heidi finally convinced me this would help me heal. So I went, and everyone was so kind, even though most of us were still grieving.
I went back the next week, and the week after that. We talked about forgiveness, shame and guilt. We talked about confessing our sins, accepting God's forgiveness and forgiving ourselves. They told me it was OK to grieve for my baby, even though other people might not think it's normal. Just because it was my choice to have an abortion, didn't change the fact that I'd still lost my baby, and I still had to deal with that loss.
When we met for the last time, we had a memorial service for my baby. Heidi had asked me to name my child. Before I went to counseling, I had a dream that I was walking to my parents' house, holding a little girl in my arms. Because of this dream, I knew my baby was a girl. I named her Chastity Soleil.
The memorial service helped in the healing process, but I still hadn't made the big decision about what I was going to do with Jesus. I wasn't ready to give anyone control of my life. So shortly after I stopped meeting with the Bible study group, I went right back to Rob and my old lifestyle. But it was different this time, because I felt guilty about it.
After struggling with guilt for about six months, I finally broke up with Rob. I started going to church. And I decided I wanted Christ's love in my life, so I asked Jesus into my heart. That was almost two years ago, and I've been walking with God ever since.
Amazed By His Grace
I now lead a Bible study and am actively involved with college students at my church. I haven't dated anyone since Rob. I'm waiting on God's timing. Best of all, I don't deal with overwhelming guilt anymore. Jesus has forgiven me, and I've finally forgiven myself. There are still times that I cry. Especially in April, on the anniversary of my abortion. But I don't cry out of guilt or shame. I just miss the baby I didn't have.
I'll have to live with my decision for the rest of my life. Yes, God forgave me, and because of that, I forgave myself. But some days, I wonder what my life would've been like if I had Chastity Soleil. If I think about it too much, I get sad. So instead, I look forward to God's plans for me. I thank him for his forgiveness, his grace, his healing.
But most of all, I thank him for my daughter. After all, if not for her, I probably would've never met the God who calls me his own precious child.
Amanda
Jesus Rocks my world!!!
This life really stinks sometimes, but God is the greatest and the most faithful! Here's how he's moved throughout my life.
Mary Beth age - 19, Tennesee, USA
I was born to two church going parents, but God was never a really active part of our lives. I knew who He was, and I knew that I was supposed to talk to Him and keep his laws, but beyond that and the basic Bible stories God was the guy at church. In my later elementary years, my parents divorced, which is the story of so many of our lives these days. My sister and I were angry and confused, but we were good kids, so we behaved. In my sixth grade year, my mother remarried a recovering alcoholic/drug addict. He had a year or so of being sober before she married him. We now know that that isn't the greatest time to enter into a long-term relationship with an addict, but we were oblivious to the problems this would cause later.
My seventh grade year, I went to this Christian music festival called Ichthus. I didn't know squat about Christian music, I just figured that Amy Grant might be there. She wasn't but this tiny band called DC Talk was.... and I was in heaven. I also got my ticket to heaven. Right at that little tabernacle in Wilmore KY I accepted Christ into my life. I began to live for God and seek his way of doing things. Not a moment too soon, either.
Soon after Ichthus the other side of my stepfather came out. For some reason he liked to pick on me. He said not little lovingly teasing things, but things that really hurt. I thought I was crazy for this because Mom did nothing to stop it and acted as if there was nothing really wrong. I was never yelled at or physically hit, but my step dad would find tiny ways to make me feel stupid and crazy. Anger started rising up in me that I didn't know what to do with or how to control. So I did what every good little kid does: I shoved it inside and refused to deal with it.
I continued going to Ichthus and my freshman year in high school I met the greatest guy I had ever known. He was a year older than me and he was into all the same music I was. *swoon, enter cupid, etc.* We wrote back and forth throughout the year and he asked me to his prom. Joel lived in Indiana, I lived in Tennessee. My parents, in the ultimate act of coolness) agreed to drive me the four hours to be with him. The next Ichthus I was so pumped! Joel was there, and we went everywhere together (hand in hand, of course). Prom was the week after, and I had a blast!
That was the last of the cool years, however. My junior year in high school began the series of nightmares that made my life seem like a really bad after school special. Things had gotten so bad with my step dad that I avoided him. Christmas was coming up, and he was on what they call in 12 Step programs a "dry drunk" He had left all the teachings that helped him keep his sobriety behind and was acting like an addict, without the drugs. That Christmas Day he was playing with my guitar and my effects processor that I'd gotten that morning. I finally got up the guts to call him on his crap. He got mad, called me stupid and stormed out. He just left. On Christmas Day he left in a screech of tires and called to say he didn't know when, if at all, he was coming back. That really sucked.
In February it came out (after he came back, left, came back, and got kicked out by mom) that he had relapsed into cocaine. Off he goes to treatment and stays until the day before Ichthus. Of course he comes back all apologies and is sweet and quiet, for a while. At Ichthus, I went to find Joel. He wasn't there. He wasn't allowed to go with his church because they didn't want him to bring drugs. Double shot to the heart. I cried, but Whiteheart played that night, and when Rick spoke before singing "Even the Hardest Heart," he was talking straight to me. Big time crying festival.
That May we found out that my step dad was back into drugs, so mom began the cycle of kicking him out, he begs his way back, he leaves, etc. That was the summer I stayed home all but three weeks because of all my summer activities. I attended Governor's School for International Studies that year, focusing on the Middle East.
When your faith is already weak, it's not a good idea to spend intensive study in the Muslim faith. After all that had been going on, I was at the point where I said "God, most of us agree you're up there, show me how!" He super glued me to Christ, and I'm still serving him! :o)
School started and it was pretty clear mom was headed for her second divorce. She told my step dad of this and he left. (not surprisingly) He came back the Sunday after that Friday to get his precious jet ski. He went out on that thing and never came back. They found his body in the river that Tuesday morning. Talk about turning your world upside down! Every one of us had had thoughts similar to "it would be easier if he'd just die." We were wrong. Again, God's faithfulness came through and he held my hand through all this.
We had just started to get our lives as close to normal as we could, when my mother was in an accident. It wasn't very serious, but she was in the hospital for a day and was out of work for three weeks. It was horrifying to come home from school to hear "Girls, your mother's been hurt, go to the hospital." Again, the Grace and presence of God kept me from going insane. My sister was not so fortunate.
Three months after this, my sister swallowed a lot of pills and was sent to the same treatment center my step dad had been in only a year ago. It was at this point I lost it. I sat down in the living room and cried. I didn't think I could handle it, but God took care of me. He always has and always will. I took a stress test at school and scored over 300. People with scores of 180 have a 50% chance of being mentally ill. My mom laughs when I say this, but I'm the only member of my family that hasn't had counseling or anti-depressants. (mom says I'm undiagnosed).
Through this, God has given me a heart for teenagers. He has called me into music and I know I'm supposed to reach other kids that are hurting and need love so badly. Prayer and faith can do so much with God, and each increases the other!
The moral of the story is there is NOTHING that God can't help you handle. Life isn't easy, but he can always handle things if you'll let him.
This life really stinks sometimes, but God is the greatest and the most faithful! Here's how he's moved throughout my life.
Mary Beth age - 19, Tennesee, USA
I was born to two church going parents, but God was never a really active part of our lives. I knew who He was, and I knew that I was supposed to talk to Him and keep his laws, but beyond that and the basic Bible stories God was the guy at church. In my later elementary years, my parents divorced, which is the story of so many of our lives these days. My sister and I were angry and confused, but we were good kids, so we behaved. In my sixth grade year, my mother remarried a recovering alcoholic/drug addict. He had a year or so of being sober before she married him. We now know that that isn't the greatest time to enter into a long-term relationship with an addict, but we were oblivious to the problems this would cause later.
My seventh grade year, I went to this Christian music festival called Ichthus. I didn't know squat about Christian music, I just figured that Amy Grant might be there. She wasn't but this tiny band called DC Talk was.... and I was in heaven. I also got my ticket to heaven. Right at that little tabernacle in Wilmore KY I accepted Christ into my life. I began to live for God and seek his way of doing things. Not a moment too soon, either.
Soon after Ichthus the other side of my stepfather came out. For some reason he liked to pick on me. He said not little lovingly teasing things, but things that really hurt. I thought I was crazy for this because Mom did nothing to stop it and acted as if there was nothing really wrong. I was never yelled at or physically hit, but my step dad would find tiny ways to make me feel stupid and crazy. Anger started rising up in me that I didn't know what to do with or how to control. So I did what every good little kid does: I shoved it inside and refused to deal with it.
I continued going to Ichthus and my freshman year in high school I met the greatest guy I had ever known. He was a year older than me and he was into all the same music I was. *swoon, enter cupid, etc.* We wrote back and forth throughout the year and he asked me to his prom. Joel lived in Indiana, I lived in Tennessee. My parents, in the ultimate act of coolness) agreed to drive me the four hours to be with him. The next Ichthus I was so pumped! Joel was there, and we went everywhere together (hand in hand, of course). Prom was the week after, and I had a blast!
That was the last of the cool years, however. My junior year in high school began the series of nightmares that made my life seem like a really bad after school special. Things had gotten so bad with my step dad that I avoided him. Christmas was coming up, and he was on what they call in 12 Step programs a "dry drunk" He had left all the teachings that helped him keep his sobriety behind and was acting like an addict, without the drugs. That Christmas Day he was playing with my guitar and my effects processor that I'd gotten that morning. I finally got up the guts to call him on his crap. He got mad, called me stupid and stormed out. He just left. On Christmas Day he left in a screech of tires and called to say he didn't know when, if at all, he was coming back. That really sucked.
In February it came out (after he came back, left, came back, and got kicked out by mom) that he had relapsed into cocaine. Off he goes to treatment and stays until the day before Ichthus. Of course he comes back all apologies and is sweet and quiet, for a while. At Ichthus, I went to find Joel. He wasn't there. He wasn't allowed to go with his church because they didn't want him to bring drugs. Double shot to the heart. I cried, but Whiteheart played that night, and when Rick spoke before singing "Even the Hardest Heart," he was talking straight to me. Big time crying festival.
That May we found out that my step dad was back into drugs, so mom began the cycle of kicking him out, he begs his way back, he leaves, etc. That was the summer I stayed home all but three weeks because of all my summer activities. I attended Governor's School for International Studies that year, focusing on the Middle East.
When your faith is already weak, it's not a good idea to spend intensive study in the Muslim faith. After all that had been going on, I was at the point where I said "God, most of us agree you're up there, show me how!" He super glued me to Christ, and I'm still serving him! :o)
School started and it was pretty clear mom was headed for her second divorce. She told my step dad of this and he left. (not surprisingly) He came back the Sunday after that Friday to get his precious jet ski. He went out on that thing and never came back. They found his body in the river that Tuesday morning. Talk about turning your world upside down! Every one of us had had thoughts similar to "it would be easier if he'd just die." We were wrong. Again, God's faithfulness came through and he held my hand through all this.
We had just started to get our lives as close to normal as we could, when my mother was in an accident. It wasn't very serious, but she was in the hospital for a day and was out of work for three weeks. It was horrifying to come home from school to hear "Girls, your mother's been hurt, go to the hospital." Again, the Grace and presence of God kept me from going insane. My sister was not so fortunate.
Three months after this, my sister swallowed a lot of pills and was sent to the same treatment center my step dad had been in only a year ago. It was at this point I lost it. I sat down in the living room and cried. I didn't think I could handle it, but God took care of me. He always has and always will. I took a stress test at school and scored over 300. People with scores of 180 have a 50% chance of being mentally ill. My mom laughs when I say this, but I'm the only member of my family that hasn't had counseling or anti-depressants. (mom says I'm undiagnosed).
Through this, God has given me a heart for teenagers. He has called me into music and I know I'm supposed to reach other kids that are hurting and need love so badly. Prayer and faith can do so much with God, and each increases the other!
The moral of the story is there is NOTHING that God can't help you handle. Life isn't easy, but he can always handle things if you'll let him.
"I Could Have Been Mad at God . …
I was only 4 when I became a homeless person. My parents had been divorced for a few months, and money was really tight. One day, Mom just said we were moving. The problem was, we didn't have any place to go. I was scared, and I could tell Mom was too. But she kept reminding me that God would take care of us. She had been telling me about Jesus since I was 3 years old, and I had asked him into my heart. I knew God loved me. But I couldn't help but wonder what our lives were going to be like from now on.
My first memories of my life feel like a dream. It was just me, my mom and my dad living in a beautiful house that seemed like a palace to me. I loved my parents and knew they loved me. But one morning, my dad was gone. My mom carefully explained that she and Dad were getting a divorce and that from now on, it would just be the two of us. I was too young to understand what that meant. All I knew was that my dad was gone and I really missed him.
About a year after my parents split up, Mom and I had to leave our house with only a few of our belongings. Even with Dad paying child support, we just didn't have enough money to live on. With no relatives around to help, we were on our own.
Mom had heard about a shelter for homeless families called Haven of Rest. She hoped they would take us in. Thankfully, they managed to find room for us. At the time, I was just glad to be with my mom. But now that I'm older and realize how bad things could have been for us, I'm more grateful than ever that we had a place like Haven of Rest to call home.
The shelter wasn't anything fancy, but Mom and I had our own room, there were other kids there, and the supervisor promised to help us get back on our feet.
I remember the group Bible studies, where we learned that God promises to be with us, even in the most difficult times. That was a promise both my mom and I needed to hear over and over again.
And as I look back, I can see God really did take care of Mom and me. We attended a church where we had lots of friends who prayed for us. With the help of scholarships, I was able to stay at the small Christian school where I'd already gone for a year. As hard as life was at the time, there were glimpses of God's love for us.
Within two months of arriving at the shelter, Mom was able to save up enough money for us to rent a small apartment of our own. Of course, we had nothing—no table, no dishes, no beds. But slowly, we started to put our lives together again, a piece at a time.
But in fourth grade, I began to notice Mom was acting a little strange. Even now, I can't quite explain what was different about her, I just knew that something wasn't right. That Christmas, my mom was hospitalized with a mental illness.
I was terrified that I would be sent to a foster home, that I'd have to leave my church and school friends behind. But a family from our church offered to take me in. They made sure my life stayed as normal as possible. Still, I felt the horrible pain of being apart from my mom.
Mom and I had been through so much together. She was my whole world, the only constant thing I'd ever known. And now she was gone. Because Mom's illness was serious, and because I was still so young, the hospital wouldn't allow me to visit. Mom wrote me as often as she could, but letters just weren't enough. I missed her so much, and I longed for her to come home. During the two months she was in the hospital, I think I cried myself to sleep every single night.
But once again, God took care of me. Even in the middle of the worst pain I could imagine, I remembered what Mom had always told me: "God is good, and God will never put you in a situation you can't handle." And she was right. I made it through those difficult months, and soon Mom and I were back together in our little apartment.
Naturally, things weren't easy. Mom still struggled with her illness. I had to take on a lot more responsibility around the house—much more than most people my age. When I got home from school, there were dishes to wash, clothes to fold, errands to run. I guess I had to grow up a little sooner than most kids. Still, I didn't resent my situation. I was just grateful to have Mom home, and I was willing to do whatever I had to do to keep us together. Fortunately, Mom never had to be hospitalized again.
Getting a glimpse of how difficult life can be has made me determined to succeed. Throughout junior high and now high school, I've looked for ways I can serve my school and my community. Because there have been so many people who've made a difference in my life—the staff at Haven of Rest, the family who took me in when Mom was hospitalized—I know that sometimes the simplest gesture can change someone else's life. Someday, I hope to be a politician, so I can serve the people who, like Mom and me, have struggled and need the help of other people.
With dreams of ending up in Washington, D.C, someday, I should've been thrilled when my high school principal approached me with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity: There was an opening for a congressional page in the U.S. House of Representatives. But all I could think was, I can't leave my mom. I can't leave my friends. My life is finally stable and now you want me to move away from home for six months? Forget it!
Still, I knew I needed to give this opportunity some serious thought and prayer. I came home from school that day and told Mom about the page position.
It broke my heart to see tears trickle slowly down her face, and before long, we were both sobbing. The thought of being apart for such a long time was hard for both of us. But as Mom and I talked, it became clear this was an opportunity I couldn't pass up.
So I packed up and left for Washington in January of my junior year of high school. I knew I was in for quite an adventure. Every year, the Senate and the House of Representatives select high school students from all across the country to serve as pages. The pages run errands, work on the floor of the Congress, and spend long hours assisting the men and women who make the laws and policies that affect all of us. It's a ton of work and a huge honor.
Once I get there, I thought, I'll be so busy I won't even miss home. Boy, was I wrong. Yeah, I was busy, but I battled homesickness so intense I thought my heart would explode. I think of myself as a tough, independent person, but once I got settled into my new job, I realized it was going to be a long six months.
I was hundreds of miles away from my home, my mom, my best friends, my classmates. Back home, the second half of my junior year was just getting started. And all the clubs I was in, all the activities I'd been so deeply involved in, were going on without me.
But one night as I sat in my room, I once again remembered what Mom had always said when times were tough: "Megan, God will never put you in a situation if he doesn't want you there. Even the hardest situation can work out for the best if you're willing to change your perspective."
And I knew she was right. That night, I thought back on some of the tough times in my life. I could have been mad at God for letting Mom and me become homeless, but I knew it was God who provided a place for us to stay; we never spent a single night sleeping in the streets. I could have gotten angry with God for taking Mom away from me when I needed her so much, but it was God who brought people into my life who cared about me and made sure I never had to live in a foster home. Yeah, there were tough times, but God always provided everything I needed to get through.
So I knew God would provide for me in D.C. With his help, I could handle a few more months away from the people I loved. I could risk leaving behind all the accomplishments I'd worked so hard for. I could trust God to comfort me in my loneliness. I could trust God to use this amazing experience to make me a better person.
I could trust God, period.
I was only 4 when I became a homeless person. My parents had been divorced for a few months, and money was really tight. One day, Mom just said we were moving. The problem was, we didn't have any place to go. I was scared, and I could tell Mom was too. But she kept reminding me that God would take care of us. She had been telling me about Jesus since I was 3 years old, and I had asked him into my heart. I knew God loved me. But I couldn't help but wonder what our lives were going to be like from now on.
My first memories of my life feel like a dream. It was just me, my mom and my dad living in a beautiful house that seemed like a palace to me. I loved my parents and knew they loved me. But one morning, my dad was gone. My mom carefully explained that she and Dad were getting a divorce and that from now on, it would just be the two of us. I was too young to understand what that meant. All I knew was that my dad was gone and I really missed him.
About a year after my parents split up, Mom and I had to leave our house with only a few of our belongings. Even with Dad paying child support, we just didn't have enough money to live on. With no relatives around to help, we were on our own.
Mom had heard about a shelter for homeless families called Haven of Rest. She hoped they would take us in. Thankfully, they managed to find room for us. At the time, I was just glad to be with my mom. But now that I'm older and realize how bad things could have been for us, I'm more grateful than ever that we had a place like Haven of Rest to call home.
The shelter wasn't anything fancy, but Mom and I had our own room, there were other kids there, and the supervisor promised to help us get back on our feet.
I remember the group Bible studies, where we learned that God promises to be with us, even in the most difficult times. That was a promise both my mom and I needed to hear over and over again.
And as I look back, I can see God really did take care of Mom and me. We attended a church where we had lots of friends who prayed for us. With the help of scholarships, I was able to stay at the small Christian school where I'd already gone for a year. As hard as life was at the time, there were glimpses of God's love for us.
Within two months of arriving at the shelter, Mom was able to save up enough money for us to rent a small apartment of our own. Of course, we had nothing—no table, no dishes, no beds. But slowly, we started to put our lives together again, a piece at a time.
But in fourth grade, I began to notice Mom was acting a little strange. Even now, I can't quite explain what was different about her, I just knew that something wasn't right. That Christmas, my mom was hospitalized with a mental illness.
I was terrified that I would be sent to a foster home, that I'd have to leave my church and school friends behind. But a family from our church offered to take me in. They made sure my life stayed as normal as possible. Still, I felt the horrible pain of being apart from my mom.
Mom and I had been through so much together. She was my whole world, the only constant thing I'd ever known. And now she was gone. Because Mom's illness was serious, and because I was still so young, the hospital wouldn't allow me to visit. Mom wrote me as often as she could, but letters just weren't enough. I missed her so much, and I longed for her to come home. During the two months she was in the hospital, I think I cried myself to sleep every single night.
But once again, God took care of me. Even in the middle of the worst pain I could imagine, I remembered what Mom had always told me: "God is good, and God will never put you in a situation you can't handle." And she was right. I made it through those difficult months, and soon Mom and I were back together in our little apartment.
Naturally, things weren't easy. Mom still struggled with her illness. I had to take on a lot more responsibility around the house—much more than most people my age. When I got home from school, there were dishes to wash, clothes to fold, errands to run. I guess I had to grow up a little sooner than most kids. Still, I didn't resent my situation. I was just grateful to have Mom home, and I was willing to do whatever I had to do to keep us together. Fortunately, Mom never had to be hospitalized again.
Getting a glimpse of how difficult life can be has made me determined to succeed. Throughout junior high and now high school, I've looked for ways I can serve my school and my community. Because there have been so many people who've made a difference in my life—the staff at Haven of Rest, the family who took me in when Mom was hospitalized—I know that sometimes the simplest gesture can change someone else's life. Someday, I hope to be a politician, so I can serve the people who, like Mom and me, have struggled and need the help of other people.
With dreams of ending up in Washington, D.C, someday, I should've been thrilled when my high school principal approached me with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity: There was an opening for a congressional page in the U.S. House of Representatives. But all I could think was, I can't leave my mom. I can't leave my friends. My life is finally stable and now you want me to move away from home for six months? Forget it!
Still, I knew I needed to give this opportunity some serious thought and prayer. I came home from school that day and told Mom about the page position.
It broke my heart to see tears trickle slowly down her face, and before long, we were both sobbing. The thought of being apart for such a long time was hard for both of us. But as Mom and I talked, it became clear this was an opportunity I couldn't pass up.
So I packed up and left for Washington in January of my junior year of high school. I knew I was in for quite an adventure. Every year, the Senate and the House of Representatives select high school students from all across the country to serve as pages. The pages run errands, work on the floor of the Congress, and spend long hours assisting the men and women who make the laws and policies that affect all of us. It's a ton of work and a huge honor.
Once I get there, I thought, I'll be so busy I won't even miss home. Boy, was I wrong. Yeah, I was busy, but I battled homesickness so intense I thought my heart would explode. I think of myself as a tough, independent person, but once I got settled into my new job, I realized it was going to be a long six months.
I was hundreds of miles away from my home, my mom, my best friends, my classmates. Back home, the second half of my junior year was just getting started. And all the clubs I was in, all the activities I'd been so deeply involved in, were going on without me.
But one night as I sat in my room, I once again remembered what Mom had always said when times were tough: "Megan, God will never put you in a situation if he doesn't want you there. Even the hardest situation can work out for the best if you're willing to change your perspective."
And I knew she was right. That night, I thought back on some of the tough times in my life. I could have been mad at God for letting Mom and me become homeless, but I knew it was God who provided a place for us to stay; we never spent a single night sleeping in the streets. I could have gotten angry with God for taking Mom away from me when I needed her so much, but it was God who brought people into my life who cared about me and made sure I never had to live in a foster home. Yeah, there were tough times, but God always provided everything I needed to get through.
So I knew God would provide for me in D.C. With his help, I could handle a few more months away from the people I loved. I could risk leaving behind all the accomplishments I'd worked so hard for. I could trust God to comfort me in my loneliness. I could trust God to use this amazing experience to make me a better person.
I could trust God, period.
Life is not fair. I think we all know that. It twists and turns without our help, and then seems to dead-end at times. My life is no exception.
Nick
age - 16, Florida, USA
I went through a very depressing stage in my life. I was unsatisfied with life, and disgruntled at the 'dark side' of the church (I'm referring to the hypocrites, the judgers, the condemners, etc., etc., etc.). To start off with, I was 'saved' when I was really young, like around 6 or 7. I didn't really know what it meant, obviously from the fact I went up for salvation 4 consecutive times before someone told me I didn't need to go up anymore. I lived a basic pew sitter’s life, I just came to church because it was what I was supposed to do to get to Heaven. Oh, and then there were those mandatory night prayers, that I caught every other week. Basically, my walk with Christ was poop-o, nothing, so that left areas in my life for Satan to attack.
Well, to start off with, I am not a conformer, I hate to be doing what everybody else is doing! And if I wanted to dress or act a certain way, I do it! If I want to frown, I frown! If I want to smile, I'll smile! Even when it stepped over the Religious peoples toes and inferred dressing up the wrong way to church. So, I naturally became the victim of much religious condemnation for who I was, and how I dressed. I really started to question Christianity in whole, because of these people who called themselves Christians, and condemned everything on earth that didn't tickle their fancy. After that, Satan started to really do his dirty work, first making me interested in the study and practices of other religions. Soon after, I had secretly ditched Christianity, and was doing a whole lot of soul-searching.
I did a lot of study on the eastern Religions, and before I knew it, I was practicing with various forms of eastern divination methods. The art of divination got me interested in the study of the New Age, which was very fascinating for me at the time. I mean, there was so much you could do! Anybody who really looked at the New age would probably become infatuated with it. The New age led me to a study of the Occult, since I felt like the New age was a little spaced out, however you want to describe it.
A friend of mine was a Wiccan, so naturally I took on this "nature-loving" religion and gobbled up all of its little wonders and beliefs. They believe in two gods, you pick whichever two gods you want to serve, and you were going to heaven no matter what, because they said, "all religions lead to the one true god, just like a road branching out into many other paths."
I soon became entranced with the modern and black magic’s and moved my paths accordingly, away from the "good white magic religion". I rapidly grew my standing in these, becoming a 3rd Degree warlock (which is the farthest you could go without leading your own coven).
Throughout all of this, I had, I think I could call it, a "false filling", much like the opposite of "false hunger". I felt like I was filled for a time after I practiced my "arts", but deep down, my void was even bigger. I was getting sick and tired of everything, especially religion. I soon gave up on the Occult, especially after my parents discovering my involvement, and became an atheist. Nothing, it seemed, could convince me of a god or God. I called out to any god that would listen one night, shouting, "show me you are real!", but no answer was returned.
My all-time low was when the melancholic disposition I had dealt with for most of my life, took an all-time extreme with a dark, morbid depression that overtook my whole being, my life, all that I was. I had extreme surges sometimes, where I had attempted suicide twice. But I could never go through with them. I'd set the plot, a knife, and right before I could do it, a little voice, silent, yet screaming, said "Don't do it! This is not what is in store for you!"
This whole time, over this entire drama, I was going to church, simply on the fact that I didn't want my parent's to suspect anything, and also that little fact that they made me go. We were changing churches, and found this one that had a travelling evangelist that had just come. Revival broke out soon after. The people were really getting touched, and healed, and I didn't know what to think of all of this! I was like, God, if you're there, fill me up like these people are! I want this! If this is genuine Christianity, I need it! At that revival God moved in me for probably the first time in a very, very long time. He took away most of the hurt that I was dealing with, He filled all the voids in my life, and most importantly, He gave my life meaning! Most of all, he gave me a freedom I never felt before!
Sure, I still hurt sometimes, and I still have as many religious condemners as I did when I started out, but God has always been there to comfort and to heal me! I found out God is NOT a Religion, but He's a relationship, through his son, Jesus Christ. And it's an awesome relationship! I found out Christianity is not a set of rules, it's never been, it's a relationship with the person who shed his precious blood on that old rugged cross, on that place called Golgotha, the place of the skull, at Calvary, for my sins, so that I could be set free from all the bonds of sin on this short-lived earth, and have an awesome relationship with the one who has called me His own, and has taken away all the hurt, pain, and grief, that has plagued me through those senseless years of stupidity.
Real Christianity is not a religion, it's a relationship. A relationship with someone who loves you more than anybody else does! He loves you so much, He died for you, and He died so that you could have an awesome, fulfilling relationship with Him! But He didn't die for you to become a professional church attender, He died for you because He wants to have an active, awesome relationship with you. He died so that we could get rid of the sins that control our daily lives. And so that one day, we would join Him in Heaven, instead of a real, fiery, eternal Hell.
Sure, anyone can say "my God is an awesome God." but because of the awesome relationship I have with him, I can say it with all sincerity and passion, that "my God is an AWESOME God!" He is awesome, and you can discover just how awesome He is, all you have to do is ask for that relationship.
Believe me, this is the only thing that will give you true happiness. Other religions won't. The Occult won't. Drugs won't. Alcohol won't. Sex won't. Only Jesus Christ can. I know a lot of people who've come from all sorts of backgrounds and situations, and they'll all confirm that they've only found true peace and happiness in Jesus Christ.
Nick
age - 16, Florida, USA
I went through a very depressing stage in my life. I was unsatisfied with life, and disgruntled at the 'dark side' of the church (I'm referring to the hypocrites, the judgers, the condemners, etc., etc., etc.). To start off with, I was 'saved' when I was really young, like around 6 or 7. I didn't really know what it meant, obviously from the fact I went up for salvation 4 consecutive times before someone told me I didn't need to go up anymore. I lived a basic pew sitter’s life, I just came to church because it was what I was supposed to do to get to Heaven. Oh, and then there were those mandatory night prayers, that I caught every other week. Basically, my walk with Christ was poop-o, nothing, so that left areas in my life for Satan to attack.
Well, to start off with, I am not a conformer, I hate to be doing what everybody else is doing! And if I wanted to dress or act a certain way, I do it! If I want to frown, I frown! If I want to smile, I'll smile! Even when it stepped over the Religious peoples toes and inferred dressing up the wrong way to church. So, I naturally became the victim of much religious condemnation for who I was, and how I dressed. I really started to question Christianity in whole, because of these people who called themselves Christians, and condemned everything on earth that didn't tickle their fancy. After that, Satan started to really do his dirty work, first making me interested in the study and practices of other religions. Soon after, I had secretly ditched Christianity, and was doing a whole lot of soul-searching.
I did a lot of study on the eastern Religions, and before I knew it, I was practicing with various forms of eastern divination methods. The art of divination got me interested in the study of the New Age, which was very fascinating for me at the time. I mean, there was so much you could do! Anybody who really looked at the New age would probably become infatuated with it. The New age led me to a study of the Occult, since I felt like the New age was a little spaced out, however you want to describe it.
A friend of mine was a Wiccan, so naturally I took on this "nature-loving" religion and gobbled up all of its little wonders and beliefs. They believe in two gods, you pick whichever two gods you want to serve, and you were going to heaven no matter what, because they said, "all religions lead to the one true god, just like a road branching out into many other paths."
I soon became entranced with the modern and black magic’s and moved my paths accordingly, away from the "good white magic religion". I rapidly grew my standing in these, becoming a 3rd Degree warlock (which is the farthest you could go without leading your own coven).
Throughout all of this, I had, I think I could call it, a "false filling", much like the opposite of "false hunger". I felt like I was filled for a time after I practiced my "arts", but deep down, my void was even bigger. I was getting sick and tired of everything, especially religion. I soon gave up on the Occult, especially after my parents discovering my involvement, and became an atheist. Nothing, it seemed, could convince me of a god or God. I called out to any god that would listen one night, shouting, "show me you are real!", but no answer was returned.
My all-time low was when the melancholic disposition I had dealt with for most of my life, took an all-time extreme with a dark, morbid depression that overtook my whole being, my life, all that I was. I had extreme surges sometimes, where I had attempted suicide twice. But I could never go through with them. I'd set the plot, a knife, and right before I could do it, a little voice, silent, yet screaming, said "Don't do it! This is not what is in store for you!"
This whole time, over this entire drama, I was going to church, simply on the fact that I didn't want my parent's to suspect anything, and also that little fact that they made me go. We were changing churches, and found this one that had a travelling evangelist that had just come. Revival broke out soon after. The people were really getting touched, and healed, and I didn't know what to think of all of this! I was like, God, if you're there, fill me up like these people are! I want this! If this is genuine Christianity, I need it! At that revival God moved in me for probably the first time in a very, very long time. He took away most of the hurt that I was dealing with, He filled all the voids in my life, and most importantly, He gave my life meaning! Most of all, he gave me a freedom I never felt before!
Sure, I still hurt sometimes, and I still have as many religious condemners as I did when I started out, but God has always been there to comfort and to heal me! I found out God is NOT a Religion, but He's a relationship, through his son, Jesus Christ. And it's an awesome relationship! I found out Christianity is not a set of rules, it's never been, it's a relationship with the person who shed his precious blood on that old rugged cross, on that place called Golgotha, the place of the skull, at Calvary, for my sins, so that I could be set free from all the bonds of sin on this short-lived earth, and have an awesome relationship with the one who has called me His own, and has taken away all the hurt, pain, and grief, that has plagued me through those senseless years of stupidity.
Real Christianity is not a religion, it's a relationship. A relationship with someone who loves you more than anybody else does! He loves you so much, He died for you, and He died so that you could have an awesome, fulfilling relationship with Him! But He didn't die for you to become a professional church attender, He died for you because He wants to have an active, awesome relationship with you. He died so that we could get rid of the sins that control our daily lives. And so that one day, we would join Him in Heaven, instead of a real, fiery, eternal Hell.
Sure, anyone can say "my God is an awesome God." but because of the awesome relationship I have with him, I can say it with all sincerity and passion, that "my God is an AWESOME God!" He is awesome, and you can discover just how awesome He is, all you have to do is ask for that relationship.
Believe me, this is the only thing that will give you true happiness. Other religions won't. The Occult won't. Drugs won't. Alcohol won't. Sex won't. Only Jesus Christ can. I know a lot of people who've come from all sorts of backgrounds and situations, and they'll all confirm that they've only found true peace and happiness in Jesus Christ.
This past summer, I had a major pain in my left side. My mom thought it might be appendicitis, so she rushed me to the doctor. On the way to the doctor, I was in a lot of pain and really scared I might have to have surgery. I kept asking God, "Why is this happening to me?" There was nothing I could do to feel better, and I was frustrated that God allowed it to happen.
But then I realized the best thing I could do was pray and ask God to help me. When I got to the doctor's office, they examined me and found I didn't have appendicitis. Then they gave me some medicine for stomach pain and sent me home.
Even though I wanted to fix the situation, I couldn't. The only one who can completely control anything is God. Whenever I try to do things my own way, God usually shows me that I have to turn to him with my problems. Just like Jacob wrestled with God and realized God is always in control, it took some pain and fear for me to remember that God's in charge of everything.
Malcolm Jeffreys
But then I realized the best thing I could do was pray and ask God to help me. When I got to the doctor's office, they examined me and found I didn't have appendicitis. Then they gave me some medicine for stomach pain and sent me home.
Even though I wanted to fix the situation, I couldn't. The only one who can completely control anything is God. Whenever I try to do things my own way, God usually shows me that I have to turn to him with my problems. Just like Jacob wrestled with God and realized God is always in control, it took some pain and fear for me to remember that God's in charge of everything.
Malcolm Jeffreys
Many greetings!
I would like to tell you how God has guided my life so far.
My mum was saved while I was a little child. One day I realised that I had to make the decision about being saved as well, and so when I was nine years old I received the Holy Spirit and was baptised under water. Later, when I became a teenager life wasn’t that easy. I looked at my friends at school who had boyfriends and did a lot of other things like smoking and drinking alcohol and I started to desire to be like them. At this time I had stopped reading the Bible and praying, which are essential to being a Christian. I ended up in many situations with boys, which I knew were not according to God’s Word: “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman" 1 CORINTHIANS 7:1.
My bad conscience grew worse as I continued doing the things I knew God was against. I knew it was wrong in the sight of the Lord but I was in conflict with myself. I wanted to please God and, on the other hand, I also loved the world. I then talked to a few people in our church about my problems and looked up a lot of scriptures about the subject. After deciding to follow God’s ways again, I felt more relaxed and had peace in my life, but the main thing was that I was no longer tempted.
A few years later my mum came to me and told me that she was going to stop following God because she couldn’t give up her personal desires. At first I was really sad to see my mum giving up and this situation was really difficult for me to handle. The first thing I did was to get on my knees and ask my Saviour what to do and how to deal with the situation. I prayed with tears and begged Him to show me a scripture. I opened my Bible and read the following: “For there is hope of a tree, if it be cut down, that it will sprout again, and that the tender branch thereof will not cease. Though the root thereof wax old in the earth, and the stock thereof die in the ground; Yet through the scent of water it will bud, and bring forth boughs like a plant” JOB 14:7-9.
That was exactly my answer. My mum decided not to follow the Lord (being that stock which died in the ground), but I understood that if I would go on following the Lord and praying in the Holy Spirit (the scent of water) then there could still be hope for her as there was for that tree. The Lord showed me exactly where I stood and what was going to happen. Months went by, then a year, and I continued to pray eagerly that my mum would take up her walk as a Christian again. In my heart I knew that she would and that I just had to trust the Lord because He promised it in the scripture. He gave me the peace in my heart not to worry. That time was not easy for me, but I knew I just had to keep going straight ahead in my walk as a Christian.
Then after one and a half years, my mum received the grace from the Lord to come back to His work. Praise the Lord! The Lord sets His time; we just have to trust Him: PROVERBS 3:5-6. My mum is now a missionary in Italy; which is where she had desired to live for her whole life.
I want to give God the honour for leading my life, and I could not imagine living without Him, because without Him I could do nothing.
“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” PHILIPPIANS 4:13.
With love in Christ, Claudia (19), Austria
I would like to tell you how God has guided my life so far.
My mum was saved while I was a little child. One day I realised that I had to make the decision about being saved as well, and so when I was nine years old I received the Holy Spirit and was baptised under water. Later, when I became a teenager life wasn’t that easy. I looked at my friends at school who had boyfriends and did a lot of other things like smoking and drinking alcohol and I started to desire to be like them. At this time I had stopped reading the Bible and praying, which are essential to being a Christian. I ended up in many situations with boys, which I knew were not according to God’s Word: “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman" 1 CORINTHIANS 7:1.
My bad conscience grew worse as I continued doing the things I knew God was against. I knew it was wrong in the sight of the Lord but I was in conflict with myself. I wanted to please God and, on the other hand, I also loved the world. I then talked to a few people in our church about my problems and looked up a lot of scriptures about the subject. After deciding to follow God’s ways again, I felt more relaxed and had peace in my life, but the main thing was that I was no longer tempted.
A few years later my mum came to me and told me that she was going to stop following God because she couldn’t give up her personal desires. At first I was really sad to see my mum giving up and this situation was really difficult for me to handle. The first thing I did was to get on my knees and ask my Saviour what to do and how to deal with the situation. I prayed with tears and begged Him to show me a scripture. I opened my Bible and read the following: “For there is hope of a tree, if it be cut down, that it will sprout again, and that the tender branch thereof will not cease. Though the root thereof wax old in the earth, and the stock thereof die in the ground; Yet through the scent of water it will bud, and bring forth boughs like a plant” JOB 14:7-9.
That was exactly my answer. My mum decided not to follow the Lord (being that stock which died in the ground), but I understood that if I would go on following the Lord and praying in the Holy Spirit (the scent of water) then there could still be hope for her as there was for that tree. The Lord showed me exactly where I stood and what was going to happen. Months went by, then a year, and I continued to pray eagerly that my mum would take up her walk as a Christian again. In my heart I knew that she would and that I just had to trust the Lord because He promised it in the scripture. He gave me the peace in my heart not to worry. That time was not easy for me, but I knew I just had to keep going straight ahead in my walk as a Christian.
Then after one and a half years, my mum received the grace from the Lord to come back to His work. Praise the Lord! The Lord sets His time; we just have to trust Him: PROVERBS 3:5-6. My mum is now a missionary in Italy; which is where she had desired to live for her whole life.
I want to give God the honour for leading my life, and I could not imagine living without Him, because without Him I could do nothing.
“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” PHILIPPIANS 4:13.
With love in Christ, Claudia (19), Austria
God, please …
I want to talk to you, God, but I don't even know how to begin.
I have a thousand words to say to you. Ten thousand unfinished fragments all locked in my head, all waiting for you to pick them out and examine them, analyze them, answer them individually. I know I could just spill them out, but they don't fall so easily.
I want to talk to you, God. Want to listen, to know you. But I don't know how to begin. I want to pray to you. Want to pray without stopping—no pausing, no fumbling—but I don't even know how to begin.
All I seem to be able to say is a feeble, "God, please … " that I never complete.
And yet that "God, please" is the ache of my soul. I'm unable to finish, but all I want is to get close to you, to turn your head. To know you are listening to me, even though I cannot see you.
So should I constantly chatter to catch your attention? Or are my two words enough?
I have so many other thoughts stashed in my head, but if I let you hear them, would you listen? Could you, who are perfect, understand my faltering, imperfect speech?
That's what I'm really afraid of, you know. I'm afraid you want to hear eloquent soliloquies, and I don't have anything but my poor stuttering tongue.
So God, please … show me where to go with my words when I cannot find the right words to say.
Because I do want to know you. More than anything.
… The Spirit helps us in our weakness.
We do not know what we ought to pray
for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us
with groans that words cannot express.
(Romans 8:26)
The Lord has heard my cry for mercy,
the Lord accepts my prayer.
(Psalm 6:9)
I want to talk to you, God, but I don't even know how to begin.
I have a thousand words to say to you. Ten thousand unfinished fragments all locked in my head, all waiting for you to pick them out and examine them, analyze them, answer them individually. I know I could just spill them out, but they don't fall so easily.
I want to talk to you, God. Want to listen, to know you. But I don't know how to begin. I want to pray to you. Want to pray without stopping—no pausing, no fumbling—but I don't even know how to begin.
All I seem to be able to say is a feeble, "God, please … " that I never complete.
And yet that "God, please" is the ache of my soul. I'm unable to finish, but all I want is to get close to you, to turn your head. To know you are listening to me, even though I cannot see you.
So should I constantly chatter to catch your attention? Or are my two words enough?
I have so many other thoughts stashed in my head, but if I let you hear them, would you listen? Could you, who are perfect, understand my faltering, imperfect speech?
That's what I'm really afraid of, you know. I'm afraid you want to hear eloquent soliloquies, and I don't have anything but my poor stuttering tongue.
So God, please … show me where to go with my words when I cannot find the right words to say.
Because I do want to know you. More than anything.
… The Spirit helps us in our weakness.
We do not know what we ought to pray
for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us
with groans that words cannot express.
(Romans 8:26)
The Lord has heard my cry for mercy,
the Lord accepts my prayer.
(Psalm 6:9)
Role Model Or Sellout?
Sexy little black micro mini-skirts, tight crop tops that show way more than necessary, long beautiful flowing.. extensions? Welcome to the always there, in your face, and never really changing pop culture.
The world we are living in today is over-run with fake, plastic, life size Barbie dolls that wouldn’t know a hit song if it hit them “one more time”. They are playing pieces, picked over others not for their talents (or lack there of), but for their bodies. They are picked because they have “sellout” printed all over their pretty little foreheads. They are picked for one main purpose... to make their superiors rich and famous. The “chosen ones” will be pampered, put through a life changing make over, stuck in a recording studio in front of a microphone and told that their warbling (which closely resembles that of a duck call) is beautiful singing while the producers rush to send the “beautiful voice” through a tuner. They’ll grow egos the size of a small dinosaur, and be allowed to throw the temper tantrums that probably would have got them spankings as children. They’ll be taught that showing more of their body will sell more records, that they are prettier than their “lesser” fans, that they can have the world at their feet if they just snap those sexy little manicured fingers. They’ll be taught to lie, they’ll be taught to cheat, they’ll be taught to do anything and everything it takes to get to the top of the charts. Every shred of decency and any morals they have will disappear into all the powder and lipstick.
While our pop princesses are being made up for their debut into the glittery music world, we are waiting impatiently and excitedly... because maybe this next princess will have morals. Maybe she’ll be someone a parent can let their child listen to and watch without being disgusted by vulgar dance moves and sexy song lyrics that scream “take me to bed NOW”.
Yet we are faced with pretty, young, and semi- talented sellout girls every day. You turn on the t.v. and see an ad for Pepsi with Britney Spears sucking sexily on a soda bottle. MTV wouldn't dare show a video that has a Christian foundation, but they’ll gladly debut and push a Christina Aguilera video that has her singing about sex while grinding with a guy who looks to be about twice her age. All the while we eat it up like candy. Then when our sugar rushes start to fade away and we begin to question their morals and where they stand, we start to hear about what strong Christians they are. By then these princesses have hordes of blinded (and probably deafened) fans that are willing to believe anything that these divas want to dish out. So their “Christian ways” are actually a new marketing device.
Jessica Simpson came out with a hit ballad nearly three years ago that was an instant success and rocketed her up the charts to the waiting glittery fame. Her popularity was due in part to her proclaiming to be a person with strong Christian values, such as waiting until marriage before having sex. Jessica’s sweet disposition and “down home” feel about her was pure magic...for a while. She did countless interviews, many radio and television performances, and was showered with compliments on her awesome voice and virginal looks - from her newfound fans to Celine Dion.
Then we began to notice that Jessica seemed to be revealing a little more of her body with every public appearance she made. She started to contradict everything she said she stood for and began morphing into a cheap version of herself, the woman who said she would never forsake her faith for anything.
While Jessica was rewriting her morals, we were bombarded constantly by people saying that her father is a minister, as if in some lame attempt to justify the way Jessica was dressing and acting. Jessica’s friends, her fans, and even her own father screamed “Jessica is a big girl now, she can dress the way she wants!”. Did you know that Christian morals are age specific? No? That’s because they’re not. Nowhere in the Bible does it say “You are 21 now, dress the way you want! Party all you want! Forget you stand for Jesus and pose for that men’s magazine!”.
Do us girls want guys to think we’re sexy? Of course. Do we need to resort to spreading our legs, showing our cleavage, and abandoning our faith to do so? No way.
I’ve tried so hard to figure out where our society lost sight of what a “good thing” really is. I have failed to do so. Why can’t we show how adorable and pretty we REALLY are by keeping our clothes on? Why can’t we show how sexy and respectable we can be by professing our faith and backing it up with our actions? According to several fans, critics, and even non-fans of these pop girls.. sex sells. But we don’t have to buy it.
Amanda Carlson
Sexy little black micro mini-skirts, tight crop tops that show way more than necessary, long beautiful flowing.. extensions? Welcome to the always there, in your face, and never really changing pop culture.
The world we are living in today is over-run with fake, plastic, life size Barbie dolls that wouldn’t know a hit song if it hit them “one more time”. They are playing pieces, picked over others not for their talents (or lack there of), but for their bodies. They are picked because they have “sellout” printed all over their pretty little foreheads. They are picked for one main purpose... to make their superiors rich and famous. The “chosen ones” will be pampered, put through a life changing make over, stuck in a recording studio in front of a microphone and told that their warbling (which closely resembles that of a duck call) is beautiful singing while the producers rush to send the “beautiful voice” through a tuner. They’ll grow egos the size of a small dinosaur, and be allowed to throw the temper tantrums that probably would have got them spankings as children. They’ll be taught that showing more of their body will sell more records, that they are prettier than their “lesser” fans, that they can have the world at their feet if they just snap those sexy little manicured fingers. They’ll be taught to lie, they’ll be taught to cheat, they’ll be taught to do anything and everything it takes to get to the top of the charts. Every shred of decency and any morals they have will disappear into all the powder and lipstick.
While our pop princesses are being made up for their debut into the glittery music world, we are waiting impatiently and excitedly... because maybe this next princess will have morals. Maybe she’ll be someone a parent can let their child listen to and watch without being disgusted by vulgar dance moves and sexy song lyrics that scream “take me to bed NOW”.
Yet we are faced with pretty, young, and semi- talented sellout girls every day. You turn on the t.v. and see an ad for Pepsi with Britney Spears sucking sexily on a soda bottle. MTV wouldn't dare show a video that has a Christian foundation, but they’ll gladly debut and push a Christina Aguilera video that has her singing about sex while grinding with a guy who looks to be about twice her age. All the while we eat it up like candy. Then when our sugar rushes start to fade away and we begin to question their morals and where they stand, we start to hear about what strong Christians they are. By then these princesses have hordes of blinded (and probably deafened) fans that are willing to believe anything that these divas want to dish out. So their “Christian ways” are actually a new marketing device.
Jessica Simpson came out with a hit ballad nearly three years ago that was an instant success and rocketed her up the charts to the waiting glittery fame. Her popularity was due in part to her proclaiming to be a person with strong Christian values, such as waiting until marriage before having sex. Jessica’s sweet disposition and “down home” feel about her was pure magic...for a while. She did countless interviews, many radio and television performances, and was showered with compliments on her awesome voice and virginal looks - from her newfound fans to Celine Dion.
Then we began to notice that Jessica seemed to be revealing a little more of her body with every public appearance she made. She started to contradict everything she said she stood for and began morphing into a cheap version of herself, the woman who said she would never forsake her faith for anything.
While Jessica was rewriting her morals, we were bombarded constantly by people saying that her father is a minister, as if in some lame attempt to justify the way Jessica was dressing and acting. Jessica’s friends, her fans, and even her own father screamed “Jessica is a big girl now, she can dress the way she wants!”. Did you know that Christian morals are age specific? No? That’s because they’re not. Nowhere in the Bible does it say “You are 21 now, dress the way you want! Party all you want! Forget you stand for Jesus and pose for that men’s magazine!”.
Do us girls want guys to think we’re sexy? Of course. Do we need to resort to spreading our legs, showing our cleavage, and abandoning our faith to do so? No way.
I’ve tried so hard to figure out where our society lost sight of what a “good thing” really is. I have failed to do so. Why can’t we show how adorable and pretty we REALLY are by keeping our clothes on? Why can’t we show how sexy and respectable we can be by professing our faith and backing it up with our actions? According to several fans, critics, and even non-fans of these pop girls.. sex sells. But we don’t have to buy it.
Amanda Carlson
Psalms 91:11
For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;
It’s comforting to know that no matter what life throws at us or what dangers we may face, God has His protection over us.
This fact became very real to my family and I this past week. Our twenty five year old son Matt is studying to be an accountant. He lives 750 miles away from us and we don’t get to see him or his sister as often as we’d like. We’re still a close family though and there’s not a day goes by that they aren’t in my thoughts and prayers.
A couple of weeks ago, I felt prompted by the Holy Spirit to pray particularly for Matt’s safety.
Last week, Matt quit his part time job because it was conflicting with some of his classes. This week, he had been scheduled to work in a warehouse in a sketchy part of the city. Two days ago, Matt received a phone call from a former co-worker. They had been working in the warehouse when a man came in with a knife and went crazy. He brutally stabbed two people to death and severely injured four more. If Matt had not quit his job a few days before, he would have been in that warehouse.
My heart breaks for those who were injured and for those who lost their lives and yet in it all, I thank God for His faithfulness and answered prayer for our Matt.
- Pastor Glenn -
For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;
It’s comforting to know that no matter what life throws at us or what dangers we may face, God has His protection over us.
This fact became very real to my family and I this past week. Our twenty five year old son Matt is studying to be an accountant. He lives 750 miles away from us and we don’t get to see him or his sister as often as we’d like. We’re still a close family though and there’s not a day goes by that they aren’t in my thoughts and prayers.
A couple of weeks ago, I felt prompted by the Holy Spirit to pray particularly for Matt’s safety.
Last week, Matt quit his part time job because it was conflicting with some of his classes. This week, he had been scheduled to work in a warehouse in a sketchy part of the city. Two days ago, Matt received a phone call from a former co-worker. They had been working in the warehouse when a man came in with a knife and went crazy. He brutally stabbed two people to death and severely injured four more. If Matt had not quit his job a few days before, he would have been in that warehouse.
My heart breaks for those who were injured and for those who lost their lives and yet in it all, I thank God for His faithfulness and answered prayer for our Matt.
- Pastor Glenn -
My Story
Age 15 (9th grade)
Hey there. My name is Jenny, and I have a story. Since I was 10, I have struggled with various health problems. I used to get migraine headaches very unexpectedly and those were always horribly painful. They have gone down, but I still live with having a headache all of the time. I also have had stomach pain for years and that has gotten worse as I've gotten older, as well as catching general sickness very easily.
My attitude turned sour because of this and I was frustrated with God. I thought, "Why do I have to be in pain all the time?" But recently, He has taught me something. When Lazarus died, Mary and Martha both said the same thing to Jesus when he showed up: "If you had been here, my brother wouldn't have died." Martha added something after that: "But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask." What did that mean? It meant that she was TRUSTING God though the situation seemed bad.
God was telling me that I need to have an attitude like Martha's. I heard a song called "Even If" on the radio that goes, "You are God / You are good / Forever faithful One / Even if the healing / Even if the healing doesn't come."
You see, God IS faithful and good always. I guess I don't care what happens to me anymore. If I am healed—or if I get much worse—it's okay. I know that God is always going to know what's best for me, and He can use this sickness to shape my character and glorify Him.
I want people to see that He loves me and I am happy in Him even if my life isn't perfect. I'm trusting and depending on Him. Can you say the same? —Jenny
Age 15 (9th grade)
Hey there. My name is Jenny, and I have a story. Since I was 10, I have struggled with various health problems. I used to get migraine headaches very unexpectedly and those were always horribly painful. They have gone down, but I still live with having a headache all of the time. I also have had stomach pain for years and that has gotten worse as I've gotten older, as well as catching general sickness very easily.
My attitude turned sour because of this and I was frustrated with God. I thought, "Why do I have to be in pain all the time?" But recently, He has taught me something. When Lazarus died, Mary and Martha both said the same thing to Jesus when he showed up: "If you had been here, my brother wouldn't have died." Martha added something after that: "But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask." What did that mean? It meant that she was TRUSTING God though the situation seemed bad.
God was telling me that I need to have an attitude like Martha's. I heard a song called "Even If" on the radio that goes, "You are God / You are good / Forever faithful One / Even if the healing / Even if the healing doesn't come."
You see, God IS faithful and good always. I guess I don't care what happens to me anymore. If I am healed—or if I get much worse—it's okay. I know that God is always going to know what's best for me, and He can use this sickness to shape my character and glorify Him.
I want people to see that He loves me and I am happy in Him even if my life isn't perfect. I'm trusting and depending on Him. Can you say the same? —Jenny
One thing you can be assured of is that God has already worked out all the details of what your obedience will accomplish – and its all good. we need not fear what our obedience will cause to happen in our life. we should only fear what our disobedience will cause us to miss. the sooner this truth resonates in your heart, the quicker you can make peace with a command from God that you don't fully understand.
- Jessica -
- Jessica -
My Testimony
submitted by Kelly
I was so introverted in high school, I didn't have a single friend – no one to talk to, and no reason to live. If I did kill myself, I thought, who'd even care? Whose life would be affected if I ended mine?
Because my dad was at work most of the time and my mom would often be away from home for months at a time, I knew it could be days before they noticed I was gone. And that scared me.
Our family had just moved, and as a junior in high school my whole life seemed uprooted and unsettled. There I was, the new kid in school and so shy I couldn't talk to anyone. I couldn't even raise my hand in class.
I felt I had to apologize for my existence every time someone looked at me. When the photographer asked me to smile for our class picture, I broke down and cried.
What do I have to smile about? I thought.
In a family of nine, I felt lost in the crowd. One Christmas everyone received gifts but me. It was just an oversight, of course; my mom had to buy for so many. But no words could ease the pain I felt inside when the presents were all opened and none were for me. Forgotten!
One of the more cruel members of my high school class enjoyed making fun of my timidity by drawing attention to me with comments like, "What's the matter, can't you talk? Do you have a voice?" Then he'd laugh when he had made me cry.
I finally felt I could no longer hold the pieces of my life together... If this is all life has to offer, I thought, forget it.
One night, unable to sleep because of the turmoil within me, I wished I'd die and never wake up. I decided I would either find out what life was all about or call it quits. Although I'd attended church all my life, I'd never really talked to God. In my desperation I complained to God of all my troubles and somehow sensed that he understood. It felt so good to tell someone how I was feeling.
"No one loves me," I cried.
He said, as clearly as any voice I've ever heard: "Remember that I love you." "But how can I know that?" I pleaded. Then he reminded me of the cross – the picture of perfect love. Now my tears were filled with hope. His was a love I could not deny.
The next day a girl in school told me how real God was to her and how she found comfort and guidance by reading the Bible. She invited me to go to church with her, and when I heard the message of God's personal involvement in people's lives, I wept uncontrollably. In all my years of churchgoing, never had I heard such words of life and hope.
Several young people came and put their arms around me, telling me they loved me, that God loved me, too. They also invited me to a youth retreat that weekend. Early one morning, sitting on a rock by a quiet lake in Georgia, I gave my life to Jesus Christ.
Over the next few days I pored over the Scriptures. As I read, God's plan for my life became clearer to me. I read that "all have sinned" and "there is no one righteous, not even one." (Rom. 3:10, 23) But I also read, "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – not of yourselves, it is the gift of God – not of works, lest any man boast." (Eph 2:8, 9) When I returned to school the next fall, the boy who had always mocked me because of my shyness approached me in the cafeteria. "What happened to you over the summer?" he asked. "You're so different!"
I told him about God's love for me and about his mercy, how I had found meaning for my life. And this same boy who had so enjoyed making me cry was now nearly in tears himself as he told me about his own family problems.
It wasn't easy for me, however. Even though I was only 16, my dad kicked me out when he found out about my faith in Christ. But I found in the family of God a love and acceptance I never knew as a child.
It's been [over 30 years] since I gave my life to Jesus Christ. I still struggle with feelings of loneliness and self-acceptance, but God always meets me there. He has given me a new security and stability. "Though [a mother] may forget, I will not forget you!" (Isa. 49:15) I have a friend in Jesus Christ, someone I can always talk to and with whom I can be myself.
Knowing that God, who is perfect, loves and accepts me as I am, has also given me new confidence and self-acceptance. He valued my life so much (a life I was ready to throw away) that he sent his Son to die in my place. The inferiority I felt so strongly as a child is now gone, replaced by a sense of self-worth, in Him.
"Therefore, if anyone be in Christ, he is a new creature; old things have passed away, all things have become new!" 2 Corin 5:17
submitted by Kelly
I was so introverted in high school, I didn't have a single friend – no one to talk to, and no reason to live. If I did kill myself, I thought, who'd even care? Whose life would be affected if I ended mine?
Because my dad was at work most of the time and my mom would often be away from home for months at a time, I knew it could be days before they noticed I was gone. And that scared me.
Our family had just moved, and as a junior in high school my whole life seemed uprooted and unsettled. There I was, the new kid in school and so shy I couldn't talk to anyone. I couldn't even raise my hand in class.
I felt I had to apologize for my existence every time someone looked at me. When the photographer asked me to smile for our class picture, I broke down and cried.
What do I have to smile about? I thought.
In a family of nine, I felt lost in the crowd. One Christmas everyone received gifts but me. It was just an oversight, of course; my mom had to buy for so many. But no words could ease the pain I felt inside when the presents were all opened and none were for me. Forgotten!
One of the more cruel members of my high school class enjoyed making fun of my timidity by drawing attention to me with comments like, "What's the matter, can't you talk? Do you have a voice?" Then he'd laugh when he had made me cry.
I finally felt I could no longer hold the pieces of my life together... If this is all life has to offer, I thought, forget it.
One night, unable to sleep because of the turmoil within me, I wished I'd die and never wake up. I decided I would either find out what life was all about or call it quits. Although I'd attended church all my life, I'd never really talked to God. In my desperation I complained to God of all my troubles and somehow sensed that he understood. It felt so good to tell someone how I was feeling.
"No one loves me," I cried.
He said, as clearly as any voice I've ever heard: "Remember that I love you." "But how can I know that?" I pleaded. Then he reminded me of the cross – the picture of perfect love. Now my tears were filled with hope. His was a love I could not deny.
The next day a girl in school told me how real God was to her and how she found comfort and guidance by reading the Bible. She invited me to go to church with her, and when I heard the message of God's personal involvement in people's lives, I wept uncontrollably. In all my years of churchgoing, never had I heard such words of life and hope.
Several young people came and put their arms around me, telling me they loved me, that God loved me, too. They also invited me to a youth retreat that weekend. Early one morning, sitting on a rock by a quiet lake in Georgia, I gave my life to Jesus Christ.
Over the next few days I pored over the Scriptures. As I read, God's plan for my life became clearer to me. I read that "all have sinned" and "there is no one righteous, not even one." (Rom. 3:10, 23) But I also read, "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – not of yourselves, it is the gift of God – not of works, lest any man boast." (Eph 2:8, 9) When I returned to school the next fall, the boy who had always mocked me because of my shyness approached me in the cafeteria. "What happened to you over the summer?" he asked. "You're so different!"
I told him about God's love for me and about his mercy, how I had found meaning for my life. And this same boy who had so enjoyed making me cry was now nearly in tears himself as he told me about his own family problems.
It wasn't easy for me, however. Even though I was only 16, my dad kicked me out when he found out about my faith in Christ. But I found in the family of God a love and acceptance I never knew as a child.
It's been [over 30 years] since I gave my life to Jesus Christ. I still struggle with feelings of loneliness and self-acceptance, but God always meets me there. He has given me a new security and stability. "Though [a mother] may forget, I will not forget you!" (Isa. 49:15) I have a friend in Jesus Christ, someone I can always talk to and with whom I can be myself.
Knowing that God, who is perfect, loves and accepts me as I am, has also given me new confidence and self-acceptance. He valued my life so much (a life I was ready to throw away) that he sent his Son to die in my place. The inferiority I felt so strongly as a child is now gone, replaced by a sense of self-worth, in Him.
"Therefore, if anyone be in Christ, he is a new creature; old things have passed away, all things have become new!" 2 Corin 5:17
Get Out of that Comfort Zone
Today I want to exhort you as a sister in Christ. I have reflected upon this issue over the years and think it is time to say something. In my experiences with talking to people and even just sitting back and observing how Christians react to certain secular issues, I have begun to see the urgency for us to face current issues straight in the eye.
World hunger, racism, homosexuality, gender roles, homelessness, environmental responsibility etc. These are all topics that make many of us uncomfortable. Over the past semester, I have learned more about these issues and felt a burden to talk about them with others. However, I experienced many dead ends. I understand. We like to be comfortable. We may hear that a child is dying of hunger overseas, but we do not like to dwell on this for very long. We hear that someone is homosexual, and we automatically pass judgment. We pass countless homeless people every day, yet fail to let the reality soak in that a fellow human being has no place to rest his/her head.
God has placed a burden on my heart to pay attention to the sins and problems of this world. God wants me to be uncomfortable. He wants me to step outside of my comfort zone and realize that this life is not about pleasing myself, or living my own personal life. My life is to be lived for God and God alone. He has called me to education. He does not want me to be ignorant of matters of this world. He has called me to conversation. God wants me to reach out and understand these matters from an insider's perspective. He has called me to compassion. If God has the quality of compassion, how much more would he desire me to possess such a quality? Once I am in relationship with those in the world, I can empathize with their hurt, their questions, and their longing for something more. God has called me to service. I cannot stop at empathy. If I have compassion, this compassion should be so strong that it compels me to do above and beyond the service needed. God promises, "Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." (Matthew 25:40)
Dear friend, whoever is reading this blog, I urge you to let God place this burden on your heart as well. Pray that He would open your eyes to the hurting world. Pray that He would allow you to feel uncomfortable and give you the strength to push past that feeling into action based faith. Allow God to use your discomfort for his good. Pray that you would be selfless. Pray that you would not conform to the pattern of this world. This world is so consumed with self and possessions. God's kingdom is consumed with others, self-sacrifice, God's glory and transformational power.
This world needs a light. This world doesn't want to hear what it is doing wrong. Do not go about condemning those who disagree with you. Rather, be prepared to engage with people. Understand their point of view, and be ready to get deep. God has called us for much more than surface level understanding. If you are going to help the world, you need to understand the world much better than you do now. Get deep, get real, and get uncomfortable. Who is ready to see God at work?
"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8)
"The kingdom of God is not coming with signs to be observed, nor will they say, 'Look, here it is!' or 'There!' for behold, the kingdom of God is in the midst of you." (Luke 17:20-21)
Posted by Leah Holmquist at 10:14 PM
Today I want to exhort you as a sister in Christ. I have reflected upon this issue over the years and think it is time to say something. In my experiences with talking to people and even just sitting back and observing how Christians react to certain secular issues, I have begun to see the urgency for us to face current issues straight in the eye.
World hunger, racism, homosexuality, gender roles, homelessness, environmental responsibility etc. These are all topics that make many of us uncomfortable. Over the past semester, I have learned more about these issues and felt a burden to talk about them with others. However, I experienced many dead ends. I understand. We like to be comfortable. We may hear that a child is dying of hunger overseas, but we do not like to dwell on this for very long. We hear that someone is homosexual, and we automatically pass judgment. We pass countless homeless people every day, yet fail to let the reality soak in that a fellow human being has no place to rest his/her head.
God has placed a burden on my heart to pay attention to the sins and problems of this world. God wants me to be uncomfortable. He wants me to step outside of my comfort zone and realize that this life is not about pleasing myself, or living my own personal life. My life is to be lived for God and God alone. He has called me to education. He does not want me to be ignorant of matters of this world. He has called me to conversation. God wants me to reach out and understand these matters from an insider's perspective. He has called me to compassion. If God has the quality of compassion, how much more would he desire me to possess such a quality? Once I am in relationship with those in the world, I can empathize with their hurt, their questions, and their longing for something more. God has called me to service. I cannot stop at empathy. If I have compassion, this compassion should be so strong that it compels me to do above and beyond the service needed. God promises, "Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." (Matthew 25:40)
Dear friend, whoever is reading this blog, I urge you to let God place this burden on your heart as well. Pray that He would open your eyes to the hurting world. Pray that He would allow you to feel uncomfortable and give you the strength to push past that feeling into action based faith. Allow God to use your discomfort for his good. Pray that you would be selfless. Pray that you would not conform to the pattern of this world. This world is so consumed with self and possessions. God's kingdom is consumed with others, self-sacrifice, God's glory and transformational power.
This world needs a light. This world doesn't want to hear what it is doing wrong. Do not go about condemning those who disagree with you. Rather, be prepared to engage with people. Understand their point of view, and be ready to get deep. God has called us for much more than surface level understanding. If you are going to help the world, you need to understand the world much better than you do now. Get deep, get real, and get uncomfortable. Who is ready to see God at work?
"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8)
"The kingdom of God is not coming with signs to be observed, nor will they say, 'Look, here it is!' or 'There!' for behold, the kingdom of God is in the midst of you." (Luke 17:20-21)
Posted by Leah Holmquist at 10:14 PM
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." ~ Ephesians 6:12
You know, some think that spiritual warfare and deliverance are the same thing, but I'll tell you this: they are not.
There is a difference between deliverance and spiritual warfare.
Deliverance deals with will demonic bondages and getting a person set free. It involves the breaking of the legal grounds, tearing down of the strongholds (aka: offensive spiritual warfare), and casting out of demons.
Spiritual warfare on the other hand involves resisting, overcoming and defeating the enemy's lies and he (Satan) sends our way. Spiritual warfare comes in two ways: offensive and defensive. Offensive is tearing down the strongholds that the devil has formed in your mind through things like deception and accusations, and defensive is guarding yourself against the tactics/schemes of the devil.
As Christians we are not fighting against human beings, we are fighting against the devil, his demonic forces and the kingdom of darkness (Ephesians 6:12), and Ephesians 6:10 tells us to put on the WHOLE (not some, not most, but ALL OF IT.) armor of God that we can be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. The devil will use many things to fight against you. Three of his primary weapons are deception, temptation and accusations.
Deception: In case you don't know the meaning of it, deception means to deceive somebody, to make another person believe a lie or something that is not true. When the enemy (Satan) sends deception on your way, it is an attempt to deceive you into believing something that is not true, so that you'll fall into error. Jesus himself said in John 8:44 that Satan is "a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.” Strongholds are built via deception which are formed when deception takes hold in a person's mind. A stronghold is an incorrect thinking pattern that stems from believing something that is not true.
From the very beginning, Satan deceived Eve into believing that God's Word was not true, (when really it is), thus making her to eat the forbidden fruit. In Genesis 3:4, the devil told her that she will not surely die as God said she would in Genesis 2:17. As Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, little did they know that they died spiritually?
Having mentioned the armor of God earlier, we have two weapons to deal with deceptions: the belt of Truth (Ephesians 6:14) and the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God (Ephesians 6:17). Both of them are Truth which is found in God's Holy Word. You may be wondering "Why are they given different names (a sword and a belt)?" That's because one is meant to be defensive (the belt), while the other is meant to be offensive (the sword), which means that the Word of God is both an offensive and defensive weapon. A belt is what you wear to guard against an attack, while a sword is used to slaughter the enemy.
You use the belt of Truth (God's Word) to guard against the enemy's deception (lies) he sends your way, while you use the sword of the Spirit (which is the Word of God) to tear down the existing strongholds (deception that took hold) in your mind.
In Romans 12:2, we are told "Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind." How do we renew our minds? By getting in God's Word! In Ephesians 5:26, this process is referred to as washing of water by the Word. But what are we seeing today? Churches allowing the world to shape them, and letting sin such as homosexuality, divorce, etc. to creep in as a norm. It shouldn't be that way.
As Christians, we should never be shaped by the world.
Temptation: Temptation often follows deception. First the enemy tells us "You won't surely die!", then he makes the forbidden fruit look good to us (when in reality, it ain't good. AT ALL.). Since Eve accepted Satan's deception (his lie for that matter), now the tree that she was not supposed to touch looked good to her. She was tempted (enticed) to sin, because she allowed herself to first be deceived. Temptation is when we are enticed/encouraged to sin in one way or the other.
In Matthew 4, Jesus was led out in the desert to be tempted by the devil. The devil tried to convince Jesus with three temptations: to command the stones to be made bread, that it would be harmless to jump off a building, and to bow down to him. In this world, people will be often so drawn to sinful activities like premarital sex with their boyfriend/girlfriend when the enemy tries to convince them that its harmless and fun, when really, it's not harmless AT ALL, rather creates an open door to the devil. Jesus saw through Satan's deception, and resisted the temptations by speaking God's Word. King David (the shepherd boy who slew Goliath) said in Psalms 119:11, "Thy Word have I hidden in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee."
When the enemy tempts you, he's showing you the worm...but behind that worm is a hook used to trap you. The Word of God helps you to see the hook behind the worm.
In James 4:7, we are told to resist the devil and he will flee from us. But it's not that simple; in the very same verse, we are told to draw near to God. Submitting to God is important in the life of a Christian. Dealing with temptation is a twofold process of resisting the devil and drawing near to God. The Closer you get to God and the more you are aware of His love, the less power temptation will have over you.
Accusations: The devil is also known as the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:10). He is known to take a believer who has done an embarrassing or gross sin in their past, and continue to rub it in their faces and beat them down with guilt and condemnation over their past. As Christians, we have to rebuke the enemy’s thoughts. It is better to focus on what God thinks than what others think. Tell the devil that you no longer belong to him. And remember, 2 Corinthians 5:17-19 says "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation."
Apart from these three primary weapons, he devil uses other means to fight against us, it can be through a situation, through your friends, your classmates/colleagues, through bad laws, through anything, and as Christians we need to be armed and ready, watchful and prayerful, live a righteous and holy life that is acceptable unto God, and most of all, we must be always alert, because you'll never know, when the enemy will strike.
Submitted by Faith UK
You know, some think that spiritual warfare and deliverance are the same thing, but I'll tell you this: they are not.
There is a difference between deliverance and spiritual warfare.
Deliverance deals with will demonic bondages and getting a person set free. It involves the breaking of the legal grounds, tearing down of the strongholds (aka: offensive spiritual warfare), and casting out of demons.
Spiritual warfare on the other hand involves resisting, overcoming and defeating the enemy's lies and he (Satan) sends our way. Spiritual warfare comes in two ways: offensive and defensive. Offensive is tearing down the strongholds that the devil has formed in your mind through things like deception and accusations, and defensive is guarding yourself against the tactics/schemes of the devil.
As Christians we are not fighting against human beings, we are fighting against the devil, his demonic forces and the kingdom of darkness (Ephesians 6:12), and Ephesians 6:10 tells us to put on the WHOLE (not some, not most, but ALL OF IT.) armor of God that we can be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. The devil will use many things to fight against you. Three of his primary weapons are deception, temptation and accusations.
Deception: In case you don't know the meaning of it, deception means to deceive somebody, to make another person believe a lie or something that is not true. When the enemy (Satan) sends deception on your way, it is an attempt to deceive you into believing something that is not true, so that you'll fall into error. Jesus himself said in John 8:44 that Satan is "a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.” Strongholds are built via deception which are formed when deception takes hold in a person's mind. A stronghold is an incorrect thinking pattern that stems from believing something that is not true.
From the very beginning, Satan deceived Eve into believing that God's Word was not true, (when really it is), thus making her to eat the forbidden fruit. In Genesis 3:4, the devil told her that she will not surely die as God said she would in Genesis 2:17. As Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, little did they know that they died spiritually?
Having mentioned the armor of God earlier, we have two weapons to deal with deceptions: the belt of Truth (Ephesians 6:14) and the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God (Ephesians 6:17). Both of them are Truth which is found in God's Holy Word. You may be wondering "Why are they given different names (a sword and a belt)?" That's because one is meant to be defensive (the belt), while the other is meant to be offensive (the sword), which means that the Word of God is both an offensive and defensive weapon. A belt is what you wear to guard against an attack, while a sword is used to slaughter the enemy.
You use the belt of Truth (God's Word) to guard against the enemy's deception (lies) he sends your way, while you use the sword of the Spirit (which is the Word of God) to tear down the existing strongholds (deception that took hold) in your mind.
In Romans 12:2, we are told "Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind." How do we renew our minds? By getting in God's Word! In Ephesians 5:26, this process is referred to as washing of water by the Word. But what are we seeing today? Churches allowing the world to shape them, and letting sin such as homosexuality, divorce, etc. to creep in as a norm. It shouldn't be that way.
As Christians, we should never be shaped by the world.
Temptation: Temptation often follows deception. First the enemy tells us "You won't surely die!", then he makes the forbidden fruit look good to us (when in reality, it ain't good. AT ALL.). Since Eve accepted Satan's deception (his lie for that matter), now the tree that she was not supposed to touch looked good to her. She was tempted (enticed) to sin, because she allowed herself to first be deceived. Temptation is when we are enticed/encouraged to sin in one way or the other.
In Matthew 4, Jesus was led out in the desert to be tempted by the devil. The devil tried to convince Jesus with three temptations: to command the stones to be made bread, that it would be harmless to jump off a building, and to bow down to him. In this world, people will be often so drawn to sinful activities like premarital sex with their boyfriend/girlfriend when the enemy tries to convince them that its harmless and fun, when really, it's not harmless AT ALL, rather creates an open door to the devil. Jesus saw through Satan's deception, and resisted the temptations by speaking God's Word. King David (the shepherd boy who slew Goliath) said in Psalms 119:11, "Thy Word have I hidden in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee."
When the enemy tempts you, he's showing you the worm...but behind that worm is a hook used to trap you. The Word of God helps you to see the hook behind the worm.
In James 4:7, we are told to resist the devil and he will flee from us. But it's not that simple; in the very same verse, we are told to draw near to God. Submitting to God is important in the life of a Christian. Dealing with temptation is a twofold process of resisting the devil and drawing near to God. The Closer you get to God and the more you are aware of His love, the less power temptation will have over you.
Accusations: The devil is also known as the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:10). He is known to take a believer who has done an embarrassing or gross sin in their past, and continue to rub it in their faces and beat them down with guilt and condemnation over their past. As Christians, we have to rebuke the enemy’s thoughts. It is better to focus on what God thinks than what others think. Tell the devil that you no longer belong to him. And remember, 2 Corinthians 5:17-19 says "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation."
Apart from these three primary weapons, he devil uses other means to fight against us, it can be through a situation, through your friends, your classmates/colleagues, through bad laws, through anything, and as Christians we need to be armed and ready, watchful and prayerful, live a righteous and holy life that is acceptable unto God, and most of all, we must be always alert, because you'll never know, when the enemy will strike.
Submitted by Faith UK
Journey to Joy
So you've had a couple of bad days. You are running late, lose your keys, and even spill your coffee on your favorite shirt. That is called a bad day. What happens when you continue to have bad day after bad day and things progressively get worse as the days go on? Now you begin to constantly forget about your schedule, when your homework is due, and an important meeting you were supposed to be at. Your interest in keeping up with life goes downhill. You start to not care about anything anymore and your one goal is to survive the day. Most activities are not fun and your energy always feels like it is being sucked out of you. Life is too hard to catch up with and the sound of ANY halt with life sounds pleasant. This my friend, is called depression.
I will be the first to admit, I struggle with depression. Last semester was a huge wake up call to me. I came to Bethel for my sophomore year expecting everything to be happy and joyful. I was hugely disappointed. From the beginning, my semester started off on the wrong foot. I had so many health issues, and then began the emotional and spiritual decline as well. I ended up at the bottom really fast. My roommates could sense a change in me, I could sense a change in myself, and no matter how much I desired change for the better, it wouldn't come! This was frustrating and caused me to feel isolated and hopeless. I felt like David who cried,
"How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day?" (Psalm 13:1-2a)
I will be honest and say I am not completely healed and this is why I call it a journey. I want to share with you and be as honest as possible about depression from my own experience and offer some hope to those who may still be in the depths of despair.
Depression is a sickness.
As a Psychology major, I will tell you that depression is labeled as a mental illness and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Every person has physical, emotional, sexual, spiritual, and mental needs. If one of these is neglected, the whole person suffers. If you were sick with a cold, you would take medicine and try to fight the disease. Same thing with being depressed. If you are depressed, do not be ashamed and try to hide the fact from others. Try to find a cure and heal your sickness. Another important aspect in thinking about depression in this way is a good reminder that you can never be fully cured. Sickness will come and go in a person's life. That is the way that we build our immune systems and grow stronger. Depression will come and go, but each time it occurs, our body's get stronger and are able to fight it off faster and with less effort.
Depression has many cures.
From my experience, all of these cures that I am about to tell you about work best in combination.
1. Professional Help
Even though I am studying Psychology to possibly be a counselor one day, I always cringed at the idea of going to see a counselor. I didn't want my friends to know that I had to see a counselor. I didn't want them to judge me or think I was mentally unstable. Now I realize that was a pride issue. I kept resisting the idea of seeing a counselor until the day I had a full blown panic attack. I was in the middle of taking a test when my stomach hurt really bad so I excused myself to go to the bathroom. As soon as I got into the bathroom stall I burst out into uncontrollable sobbing, everything was spinning, and I found it difficult to breathe. Thankfully, a woman walked in right at this moment and helped me to her office where I was able to sit down and calm down. That was the day I walked into our campus counseling office and booked myself an appointment. I needed to take action so that things wouldn't get this bad again. After this episode, I did have about two or three more panic attacks, but since I have been seeing a counselor things have gotten much better.
Interestingly, anxiety and depression are linked and so it is useful to work through anxiety issues along with depression issues. For those of you who do not believe in going to counselors, I was the same way until I experienced the healing it can bring. I didn't realize that I was so closed to talking about my problems until I walked into my first counseling appointment. I told the counselor that I was uncomfortable sharing but throughout the semester I have seen the progress that I have made. I am now open about sharing issues that bother me, and exploring my own thoughts and feelings. She has taught me to accept anxiety instead of running away from it, and to move on with life while accepting the fact that anxiety and depression do exist within.
2. Chose friends wisely, create boundaries, and stick with them.
Before I left for Christmas break, I had been growing increasingly annoyed and frustrated with a couple of my friends. I realized that I always had to bend my will for their wants, and continue changing my schedules and preferences to please them. Although friendship does demand sacrifice, it shouldn't mean constant giving on one side. That is not healthy for any relationship. I began a painful, but necessary process of placing boundaries on my friendships. I began to spend less time with these friends and more time doing extra curricular activities, work, and homework. Spending more time by myself and less time with these friends, I was able to establish my own identity and it was very satisfying to live my life free from the pressure to constantly conform to other people's wills.
Independence is okay to create and protect. We are not supposed to live by other people's expectations or desires. Caring for self is important in order to care for others. When you are not caring for yourself in an appropriate way, your relations with others suffer.
3. Run to God, and I mean RUN.
During my season of depression, I thought I was strong in my relationship with Christ, but looking back, I see how this season of depression enabled me to grow even more intimate with my Lord and Savior. I can now see how far away I was from God during this time. I engaged in worldly discussions, questioned the Christian faith, and surrounded myself with people who did not love the Lord or encourage me to love the Lord. My sister and mother encouraged me to find gratitude in the midst of this darkness. My initial reaction was, "Yeah Right". However, they were completely right. I began to realize how negative my life had become and was horrified to see how far away from God I really was. Then began the process of returning to my Heavenly Father.
At first I was ashamed. I didn't want to admit to God that I had forsaken him. I didn't want to admit to God that I had lost my passion for Him. I didn't want to admit to God that I needed to start again. God has taught me so many incredible truths about himself through this process of repentance, forgiveness, and renewal. He has taught me that he is always faithful. He has taught me that He desires me to fight daily to be in His presence. He has taught me that I can never outrun His grace. Currently, I am in the process of renewing my relationship with Christ. What does this look like? Well, I am reading His word multiple times during the day, engaging in longer prayer times, spending time with people who love God, and evaluating how my actions honor the Lord. I live in a sinful world, and a perfect relationship with Christ is hard to maintain. I have to constantly be seeking the Lord with diligence. He promises to be faithful, but I must run to the Lord.
I am overwhelmed at how awesome my God is. I want you to know that depression is a reality. Depression is one of the top rising mental diseases in the world, and I want you to be honest with yourself and do not succumb to this sickness. If you are suffering from depression, find help. Take these suggestions and talk with someone. God does not promise us a perfect life, but he does promise that he is watching over us.
"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world."- John 16:33
God is victorious over all darkness, including depression. Remember his promises, and hold onto hope! He will overcome!!
If you want prayer, please email or respond and I will be your prayer warrior!! If you have any questions as well, I would love to try to help answer them! :)
Some suggested references:
Choosing Gratitude by Nancy Lee DeMoss
21 Days to Beat Depression (This is a devotional plan on the Bible app for ipods and iphones)
THE BIBLE!! :)
"Gratitude is a lifestyle. A hard-fought, grace-infused, biblical lifestyle."- Nancy Lee DeMoss
Posted by Leah Holmquist at 12:05 PM
So you've had a couple of bad days. You are running late, lose your keys, and even spill your coffee on your favorite shirt. That is called a bad day. What happens when you continue to have bad day after bad day and things progressively get worse as the days go on? Now you begin to constantly forget about your schedule, when your homework is due, and an important meeting you were supposed to be at. Your interest in keeping up with life goes downhill. You start to not care about anything anymore and your one goal is to survive the day. Most activities are not fun and your energy always feels like it is being sucked out of you. Life is too hard to catch up with and the sound of ANY halt with life sounds pleasant. This my friend, is called depression.
I will be the first to admit, I struggle with depression. Last semester was a huge wake up call to me. I came to Bethel for my sophomore year expecting everything to be happy and joyful. I was hugely disappointed. From the beginning, my semester started off on the wrong foot. I had so many health issues, and then began the emotional and spiritual decline as well. I ended up at the bottom really fast. My roommates could sense a change in me, I could sense a change in myself, and no matter how much I desired change for the better, it wouldn't come! This was frustrating and caused me to feel isolated and hopeless. I felt like David who cried,
"How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day?" (Psalm 13:1-2a)
I will be honest and say I am not completely healed and this is why I call it a journey. I want to share with you and be as honest as possible about depression from my own experience and offer some hope to those who may still be in the depths of despair.
Depression is a sickness.
As a Psychology major, I will tell you that depression is labeled as a mental illness and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Every person has physical, emotional, sexual, spiritual, and mental needs. If one of these is neglected, the whole person suffers. If you were sick with a cold, you would take medicine and try to fight the disease. Same thing with being depressed. If you are depressed, do not be ashamed and try to hide the fact from others. Try to find a cure and heal your sickness. Another important aspect in thinking about depression in this way is a good reminder that you can never be fully cured. Sickness will come and go in a person's life. That is the way that we build our immune systems and grow stronger. Depression will come and go, but each time it occurs, our body's get stronger and are able to fight it off faster and with less effort.
Depression has many cures.
From my experience, all of these cures that I am about to tell you about work best in combination.
1. Professional Help
Even though I am studying Psychology to possibly be a counselor one day, I always cringed at the idea of going to see a counselor. I didn't want my friends to know that I had to see a counselor. I didn't want them to judge me or think I was mentally unstable. Now I realize that was a pride issue. I kept resisting the idea of seeing a counselor until the day I had a full blown panic attack. I was in the middle of taking a test when my stomach hurt really bad so I excused myself to go to the bathroom. As soon as I got into the bathroom stall I burst out into uncontrollable sobbing, everything was spinning, and I found it difficult to breathe. Thankfully, a woman walked in right at this moment and helped me to her office where I was able to sit down and calm down. That was the day I walked into our campus counseling office and booked myself an appointment. I needed to take action so that things wouldn't get this bad again. After this episode, I did have about two or three more panic attacks, but since I have been seeing a counselor things have gotten much better.
Interestingly, anxiety and depression are linked and so it is useful to work through anxiety issues along with depression issues. For those of you who do not believe in going to counselors, I was the same way until I experienced the healing it can bring. I didn't realize that I was so closed to talking about my problems until I walked into my first counseling appointment. I told the counselor that I was uncomfortable sharing but throughout the semester I have seen the progress that I have made. I am now open about sharing issues that bother me, and exploring my own thoughts and feelings. She has taught me to accept anxiety instead of running away from it, and to move on with life while accepting the fact that anxiety and depression do exist within.
2. Chose friends wisely, create boundaries, and stick with them.
Before I left for Christmas break, I had been growing increasingly annoyed and frustrated with a couple of my friends. I realized that I always had to bend my will for their wants, and continue changing my schedules and preferences to please them. Although friendship does demand sacrifice, it shouldn't mean constant giving on one side. That is not healthy for any relationship. I began a painful, but necessary process of placing boundaries on my friendships. I began to spend less time with these friends and more time doing extra curricular activities, work, and homework. Spending more time by myself and less time with these friends, I was able to establish my own identity and it was very satisfying to live my life free from the pressure to constantly conform to other people's wills.
Independence is okay to create and protect. We are not supposed to live by other people's expectations or desires. Caring for self is important in order to care for others. When you are not caring for yourself in an appropriate way, your relations with others suffer.
3. Run to God, and I mean RUN.
During my season of depression, I thought I was strong in my relationship with Christ, but looking back, I see how this season of depression enabled me to grow even more intimate with my Lord and Savior. I can now see how far away I was from God during this time. I engaged in worldly discussions, questioned the Christian faith, and surrounded myself with people who did not love the Lord or encourage me to love the Lord. My sister and mother encouraged me to find gratitude in the midst of this darkness. My initial reaction was, "Yeah Right". However, they were completely right. I began to realize how negative my life had become and was horrified to see how far away from God I really was. Then began the process of returning to my Heavenly Father.
At first I was ashamed. I didn't want to admit to God that I had forsaken him. I didn't want to admit to God that I had lost my passion for Him. I didn't want to admit to God that I needed to start again. God has taught me so many incredible truths about himself through this process of repentance, forgiveness, and renewal. He has taught me that he is always faithful. He has taught me that He desires me to fight daily to be in His presence. He has taught me that I can never outrun His grace. Currently, I am in the process of renewing my relationship with Christ. What does this look like? Well, I am reading His word multiple times during the day, engaging in longer prayer times, spending time with people who love God, and evaluating how my actions honor the Lord. I live in a sinful world, and a perfect relationship with Christ is hard to maintain. I have to constantly be seeking the Lord with diligence. He promises to be faithful, but I must run to the Lord.
I am overwhelmed at how awesome my God is. I want you to know that depression is a reality. Depression is one of the top rising mental diseases in the world, and I want you to be honest with yourself and do not succumb to this sickness. If you are suffering from depression, find help. Take these suggestions and talk with someone. God does not promise us a perfect life, but he does promise that he is watching over us.
"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world."- John 16:33
God is victorious over all darkness, including depression. Remember his promises, and hold onto hope! He will overcome!!
If you want prayer, please email or respond and I will be your prayer warrior!! If you have any questions as well, I would love to try to help answer them! :)
Some suggested references:
Choosing Gratitude by Nancy Lee DeMoss
21 Days to Beat Depression (This is a devotional plan on the Bible app for ipods and iphones)
THE BIBLE!! :)
"Gratitude is a lifestyle. A hard-fought, grace-infused, biblical lifestyle."- Nancy Lee DeMoss
Posted by Leah Holmquist at 12:05 PM
Click to set custom HTML
I was born into a non-Christian family. We thought we were Christians, because we used to go to church on Sundays. But we didn't know about the Bible verse that says we must be “born again” if we ever want to see the kingdom of God (John 3:3). Even if we'd heard it, we never stopped to think about how we could get “born again”.
I got a job in a music store. Christine was a sales clerk there. She was one of the sweetest, most honest people I had come across up to that time. And she was open about being a Christian. I could see there was something different about her, and I was sure it had something to do with her Christianity. Her self-assurance, peace, and love for Jesus Christ made a strong impact on me.
When I left the music store I got an office job. A young woman there, named Ruth, reminded me of Christine from my former job. It wasn't long before I found out that Ruth was a Christian too. I think these two young women were the only “born-again” Christians I had ever met up to that time, and they both stood out in a wonderful way.
“Ask me a question”
Ruth used to ask me about my beliefs, and I would ask her about hers. Whenever I asked her a question she didn't know the answer to, she would ask her pastor and get back to me with the answer. She always did. On the other hand, whenever she asked me a question I couldn't answer I would try to bluff my way through.
I made some stupid comments to her at times, and looking back I don't know how she stopped herself from laughing at me. I guess it was her respectful Christian upbringing. I once told her that everyone in the world had been Roman Catholic until the time of Martin Luther. Ruth had no trouble demolishing that argument. In fact, she had no trouble demolishing all my arguments.
Ruth was a happy person. She was always doing something exciting with her church youth group while I was doing little with my friends at all. Even after we both left that job, she kept in touch with me a few times, and made it clear that my spiritual life concerned her.
I was missing something
Then events started happening in my life that kept me wondering whether I was missing something by not being a Christian. I met some more Christians when I went to a camp, and after that I visited a large Christian bookstore. I started reading Christian books and tracts, and found out how to become a genuine, born-again Christian. One Monday afternoon, I gave my life to Christ and received Him as my Saviour.
It was the most wonderful and right decision I have ever made. People who have never received Christ as their Saviour just don't know the difference it can make to their lives. You have freedom, joy, happiness, and assurance in a way that is impossible without Christ in your life.
I look back now and can thank God for the influence that both Christine and Ruth had on me. I have lost touch with both of them, but I know they would be ecstatic if they knew I was now a Christian, serving God to the best of my ability in a God-loving, Bible-believing church. Thank you both.
Justin
I got a job in a music store. Christine was a sales clerk there. She was one of the sweetest, most honest people I had come across up to that time. And she was open about being a Christian. I could see there was something different about her, and I was sure it had something to do with her Christianity. Her self-assurance, peace, and love for Jesus Christ made a strong impact on me.
When I left the music store I got an office job. A young woman there, named Ruth, reminded me of Christine from my former job. It wasn't long before I found out that Ruth was a Christian too. I think these two young women were the only “born-again” Christians I had ever met up to that time, and they both stood out in a wonderful way.
“Ask me a question”
Ruth used to ask me about my beliefs, and I would ask her about hers. Whenever I asked her a question she didn't know the answer to, she would ask her pastor and get back to me with the answer. She always did. On the other hand, whenever she asked me a question I couldn't answer I would try to bluff my way through.
I made some stupid comments to her at times, and looking back I don't know how she stopped herself from laughing at me. I guess it was her respectful Christian upbringing. I once told her that everyone in the world had been Roman Catholic until the time of Martin Luther. Ruth had no trouble demolishing that argument. In fact, she had no trouble demolishing all my arguments.
Ruth was a happy person. She was always doing something exciting with her church youth group while I was doing little with my friends at all. Even after we both left that job, she kept in touch with me a few times, and made it clear that my spiritual life concerned her.
I was missing something
Then events started happening in my life that kept me wondering whether I was missing something by not being a Christian. I met some more Christians when I went to a camp, and after that I visited a large Christian bookstore. I started reading Christian books and tracts, and found out how to become a genuine, born-again Christian. One Monday afternoon, I gave my life to Christ and received Him as my Saviour.
It was the most wonderful and right decision I have ever made. People who have never received Christ as their Saviour just don't know the difference it can make to their lives. You have freedom, joy, happiness, and assurance in a way that is impossible without Christ in your life.
I look back now and can thank God for the influence that both Christine and Ruth had on me. I have lost touch with both of them, but I know they would be ecstatic if they knew I was now a Christian, serving God to the best of my ability in a God-loving, Bible-believing church. Thank you both.
Justin
Forgiveness
Nicole B.
I've made mistakes. I've been wrong. I've done things I regret, but who hasn't? I'm not perfect, but no one is and for this reason I believe in forgiveness. If you can't learn to forgive, how can you expect to be forgiven?
My dad has been my best friend my whole life. From the day I was born I was a diehard daddy’s girl. However, he hasn't always made the right decisions in life. In fact, if there's one thing I remember most throughout my childhood, it was him leaving for weeks at a time. He would get caught up with the wrong people and then be too embarrassed to come home.
A little over a year ago my parents got a divorce. It wasn't one of those quiet peaceful divorces, no, it was war. They didn’t just sit down one day and decide things weren’t working out. Instead, my mom smacked my dad in the face and my dad threw my mom head first down the stairs by her hair. It was probably the worst day of my life. But it didn’t stop there. Three months later, my grandfather, the only person who had ever kept my family together, passed away. The man who kept my father in place for all those years, was gone.
At this point, I thought to myself, wow, ok, it can’t get any worse right? Wrong. Two weeks later, my dad abandoned me. Not the kind of left me on the side of the road abandoned, but more of the just kind of walked out of my life, with no goodbye, nothing. He was caught up with all the wrong people again. For two months, I sat there confused with no answers as to why he walked out of my life. I wondered how he could choose drugs over his own daughter. I was so mad at him. He was missing out on everything, like my first high school dance. I sat there watched all my friends parents take pictures, and be so happy, while I had no one. I was so alone in a room full of people.
Until one day, I worked up the courage to text him. I had had enough. I was done playing games. I wanted answers and, I wanted them now. We decided to get lunch together and talk. We were talking for a while and it was going well, until he fell apart. I watched the strongest man I know break down and cry in my arms. It was time to put the past behind us.
Some of you might wonder how I can forgive someone who has caused so much pain. But I’ll tell you now, you should be able to forgive no matter what. Forgiving my father has changed my life so much for the better. He has gotten help, and both of us are so much happier. We’re best friends again, and he is the most amazing person I’ve ever met. So I believe in forgiveness because it truly can make a difference.
Nicole B.
I've made mistakes. I've been wrong. I've done things I regret, but who hasn't? I'm not perfect, but no one is and for this reason I believe in forgiveness. If you can't learn to forgive, how can you expect to be forgiven?
My dad has been my best friend my whole life. From the day I was born I was a diehard daddy’s girl. However, he hasn't always made the right decisions in life. In fact, if there's one thing I remember most throughout my childhood, it was him leaving for weeks at a time. He would get caught up with the wrong people and then be too embarrassed to come home.
A little over a year ago my parents got a divorce. It wasn't one of those quiet peaceful divorces, no, it was war. They didn’t just sit down one day and decide things weren’t working out. Instead, my mom smacked my dad in the face and my dad threw my mom head first down the stairs by her hair. It was probably the worst day of my life. But it didn’t stop there. Three months later, my grandfather, the only person who had ever kept my family together, passed away. The man who kept my father in place for all those years, was gone.
At this point, I thought to myself, wow, ok, it can’t get any worse right? Wrong. Two weeks later, my dad abandoned me. Not the kind of left me on the side of the road abandoned, but more of the just kind of walked out of my life, with no goodbye, nothing. He was caught up with all the wrong people again. For two months, I sat there confused with no answers as to why he walked out of my life. I wondered how he could choose drugs over his own daughter. I was so mad at him. He was missing out on everything, like my first high school dance. I sat there watched all my friends parents take pictures, and be so happy, while I had no one. I was so alone in a room full of people.
Until one day, I worked up the courage to text him. I had had enough. I was done playing games. I wanted answers and, I wanted them now. We decided to get lunch together and talk. We were talking for a while and it was going well, until he fell apart. I watched the strongest man I know break down and cry in my arms. It was time to put the past behind us.
Some of you might wonder how I can forgive someone who has caused so much pain. But I’ll tell you now, you should be able to forgive no matter what. Forgiving my father has changed my life so much for the better. He has gotten help, and both of us are so much happier. We’re best friends again, and he is the most amazing person I’ve ever met. So I believe in forgiveness because it truly can make a difference.
Absence vs. Silence
God is never absent... though He may be silent. This is what my pastor told me once, when I was going through a tough time in my life, and was questioning if God was still there. The problem is, most of us often mix up Absence and Silence. But the truth is, God loves you too much to leave you. End of story. But how is it that we remember this, when we are hurt, or in a place in life where God is silent. It really does feel like He's abandoned us sometimes, and it's hard to be able to know He's still there. So how do we know He is still there? Easy. Just remember.
Think back on all of the times that his presence was obvious. Remember all of the great things that He has done in your life, and in others'. Think back on all of the times He has helped you out of dark times and obstacles you could have never gone through with out him. How He's never left your side. He's helped you out of problems before, and He'll do it again.
HE LOVES YOU TOO MUCH
We all get so caught up in the moment, with these small stages in our lives of chaos, that we forget all about the big picture. God has His plan for you. Where you are, is exactly where you are meant to be; right where he wants you. God loves you, and if there were an easier path for you, that still lined up with his plan, you'd be there (if that makes sense).
If you still feel discouraged, think about it this way. Maybe this is God's way of communicating with you. They always say silence is the loudest cry. Here, let me give you an example. Since I was 8, I really wanted to study science. Then, last year, I thought I'd get ahead in college credits and took AP biology. And wow that was a slap in the face. I tried my hardest, studying for hours every night, and failing most of my tests. I prayed and prayed that God would help me do better and understand. Nothing happened. The ENTIRE school year, I was struggling to just pass the class. At the time, I saw this as God abandoning me. I felt as though he'd left me to fail. Then I slowly started losing interest in science. At the time I didn't think twice about it, until I started getting more interested in Writing and English. Then one day a few months ago, it randomly occurred to me, that this was God's way of pushing me back on my path.
Since then, multiple things have happened that made it clear, that science is not for me. I did end up passing the class at the last minute, though I didn't get the college credit. God was there. If anything, He was working hard to help me in the long run. (: I'm going to leave you guys with a song today (yes another Tenth Avenue North) And I BEG that you please take 3 minutes and listen to it. This song has opened my eyes. Its about how God's love is always with you and it never ends. This song means more to me than words can describe
God is never absent... though He may be silent. This is what my pastor told me once, when I was going through a tough time in my life, and was questioning if God was still there. The problem is, most of us often mix up Absence and Silence. But the truth is, God loves you too much to leave you. End of story. But how is it that we remember this, when we are hurt, or in a place in life where God is silent. It really does feel like He's abandoned us sometimes, and it's hard to be able to know He's still there. So how do we know He is still there? Easy. Just remember.
Think back on all of the times that his presence was obvious. Remember all of the great things that He has done in your life, and in others'. Think back on all of the times He has helped you out of dark times and obstacles you could have never gone through with out him. How He's never left your side. He's helped you out of problems before, and He'll do it again.
HE LOVES YOU TOO MUCH
We all get so caught up in the moment, with these small stages in our lives of chaos, that we forget all about the big picture. God has His plan for you. Where you are, is exactly where you are meant to be; right where he wants you. God loves you, and if there were an easier path for you, that still lined up with his plan, you'd be there (if that makes sense).
If you still feel discouraged, think about it this way. Maybe this is God's way of communicating with you. They always say silence is the loudest cry. Here, let me give you an example. Since I was 8, I really wanted to study science. Then, last year, I thought I'd get ahead in college credits and took AP biology. And wow that was a slap in the face. I tried my hardest, studying for hours every night, and failing most of my tests. I prayed and prayed that God would help me do better and understand. Nothing happened. The ENTIRE school year, I was struggling to just pass the class. At the time, I saw this as God abandoning me. I felt as though he'd left me to fail. Then I slowly started losing interest in science. At the time I didn't think twice about it, until I started getting more interested in Writing and English. Then one day a few months ago, it randomly occurred to me, that this was God's way of pushing me back on my path.
Since then, multiple things have happened that made it clear, that science is not for me. I did end up passing the class at the last minute, though I didn't get the college credit. God was there. If anything, He was working hard to help me in the long run. (: I'm going to leave you guys with a song today (yes another Tenth Avenue North) And I BEG that you please take 3 minutes and listen to it. This song has opened my eyes. Its about how God's love is always with you and it never ends. This song means more to me than words can describe
Your First Love
I really am at a loss for words this morning. It may be the fact that finals week is starting today. It may be the fact that my brain is so drained. It may be the fact that I drank coffee and am super jittery. Whatever the reason, I am trusting that God will give me the words to write in order to encourage, exhort, and challenge you.
I want to reflect back to this Saturday. I wrote in my journal a lot of thoughts and questions. I was honest with the Lord and through this process realized that I am not walking in a way that is honoring to Him. Here is a little clip of what my journal contains:
"One thing I am reflecting upon this morning is my lack of communion with God. Sure, I read my Bible every morning before class, but I do not continue walking in his presence throughout the day. I allow myself to become overwhelmed, angry, and bitter in many life circumstances. Gossip has become habitual, and selfish desires take over the hold Jesus has on my heart. O LORD, this should not be, this saddens me so. I want to have you burning in my heart. I want to know, believe, and act on the fact that you are beside me all the days of my life. LORD, I want you to rule and reign in all things. Show me how to burn for you. Show me how to yearn for you. Teach me how to practice your presence each and every day."
I want to challenge you today to reflect upon your own relationship with Christ. Be completely honest with yourself and with God. Change does not happen if you candy-coat circumstances. The reality is that we do lose our first love.
"But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first." (Revelation 2:4)
Life happens. We get caught up in the hustle and bustle of homework, entertainment, work, family, friends, health, etc. Wouldn't it be awesome if we could set all these distractions and spend time working on our relationship with Christ? But this is not a reality either. God calls us to place him LORD of our lives. This means in the hustle and bustle. We are to serve and honor God through every aspect of our lives. We are to prioritize God amongst everything else that is vying for our attention.
This may be a simple blog post today. You probably already knew that God is to be prioritized. But, I want you to think deeper. How can you make God your first love again? How can you make him LORD of your life? Like any other relationship, love and commitment does not come easily. If you really value your Lord and Savior, you need to make adjustments in order to fall in love with Him again. As this season draws to a close, I urge you to not let your passion for God diminish.
"What does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your should, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the LORD, which I am commanding you today for your good?" (Deuteronomy 10:12-13)
I really am at a loss for words this morning. It may be the fact that finals week is starting today. It may be the fact that my brain is so drained. It may be the fact that I drank coffee and am super jittery. Whatever the reason, I am trusting that God will give me the words to write in order to encourage, exhort, and challenge you.
I want to reflect back to this Saturday. I wrote in my journal a lot of thoughts and questions. I was honest with the Lord and through this process realized that I am not walking in a way that is honoring to Him. Here is a little clip of what my journal contains:
"One thing I am reflecting upon this morning is my lack of communion with God. Sure, I read my Bible every morning before class, but I do not continue walking in his presence throughout the day. I allow myself to become overwhelmed, angry, and bitter in many life circumstances. Gossip has become habitual, and selfish desires take over the hold Jesus has on my heart. O LORD, this should not be, this saddens me so. I want to have you burning in my heart. I want to know, believe, and act on the fact that you are beside me all the days of my life. LORD, I want you to rule and reign in all things. Show me how to burn for you. Show me how to yearn for you. Teach me how to practice your presence each and every day."
I want to challenge you today to reflect upon your own relationship with Christ. Be completely honest with yourself and with God. Change does not happen if you candy-coat circumstances. The reality is that we do lose our first love.
"But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first." (Revelation 2:4)
Life happens. We get caught up in the hustle and bustle of homework, entertainment, work, family, friends, health, etc. Wouldn't it be awesome if we could set all these distractions and spend time working on our relationship with Christ? But this is not a reality either. God calls us to place him LORD of our lives. This means in the hustle and bustle. We are to serve and honor God through every aspect of our lives. We are to prioritize God amongst everything else that is vying for our attention.
This may be a simple blog post today. You probably already knew that God is to be prioritized. But, I want you to think deeper. How can you make God your first love again? How can you make him LORD of your life? Like any other relationship, love and commitment does not come easily. If you really value your Lord and Savior, you need to make adjustments in order to fall in love with Him again. As this season draws to a close, I urge you to not let your passion for God diminish.
"What does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your should, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the LORD, which I am commanding you today for your good?" (Deuteronomy 10:12-13)
Hi, my name's Keturah (video above ) , I grew up in a Christian family, and I've always thought I was a Christian, but I wasn't. I was a good girl. I didn't swear, I prayed before I ate meals and every night before bed. I knew bible verses, bible stories, Christian songs, I attended VBS, Awwana, Sunday school, all those church things.. etc, but I didn't feel saved. I was always being taught what was right, and what was wrong. I knew that if I prayed the little "salvation prayer" and believed in God it was supposed to make me a Christian (I prayed that when I was like.. 6 or 7) and to be honest, I think I just did it because my bro did it and I thought I should too. I prayed it a few more times as I got older just because I thought I kept losing my salvation (which I don't believe can happen. I just didn't have it to begin with). I thought that little accepting Jesus into your heart prayer was supposed to make me a Christian for sure.
At the age of about 12, I started questioning whether or not I was saved. I lived like a Christian.. so I kinda just kept doing what I was doing, and hoped to make it to heaven when I die. What I didn't know was that to truly be saved, you need to have a relationship with God. I didn't know God.. Nobody told me about a relationship with Him.. nobody taught me that nobody (including a Christian) is perfect. Nobody taught me that when I make a mistake, God will forgive me if I lived for Him, because He loves me so much. Nobody made God real to me.. or showed me WHO HE IS! Seeing the way "Christians" around me lived made me think that I might not need God. Nobody really relied on Him. Nobody took Him too seriously. Nobody gave me a reason to believe that God is enough.
When I turned 14 I went the total opposite. I was done with all the Christian crap. I hated going to church, I hated praying, and because I didn't know who God really was.. I started hating Him too. I fell into depression, started cutting, started smoking a bit of pot, eventually started thinking about suicide, and then attempting. Along this period of my life, I was going to a really great youth group though, and my youth pastor started making me think about things I've never ever thought about, he showed me what being a Christian is really about, and how God wants to have a relationship with me. I wouldn't really let it sink in too deep, or change me in any way, but God did start becoming more real to me. At my darkest moments I'd pray to God, and every time He'd answer my prayers and show me how much He loves me. For a bit I'd just kinda say thanks, but I'm still not sure about You, and I don't think You can save me, but God just kept sending people into my life, and doing things that would bring me a bit closer to Him each time, and finally one night I hit rock bottom. My parents told me they were divorcing, and my boyfriend left me. At this point I just wanted to go outside on that dark and rainy night, lay down in the dirt, and die.. but then I felt like God was telling me that He can still save me if I let Him, and I'd be able to rely on Him, because He loves me more than anyone in the world, and He would never EVER leave me! So I just cried out to Him, and told Him I wanted Him. I wanted to start a relationship with Him. I wanted to live for Him. I wanted to have hope, a reason to keep living, and a God that would be with me no matter where I am or what I'm going through. A God that will love me no matter what.That night I decided to follow God, and since then I have been filled with so much peace, hope, and joy. He has given me a reason to live, and I will follow Him no matter what the cost. I'm not going to lie.. Life still gets hard.. the past still brings me down sometimes, and my heart still isn't totally healed. but God gives me strength to get through hardships, reminds me that the past doesn't matter anymore and I'm not who I used to be, and I have faith that my heart will fully heal someday.. whether it be in this life, or in the life to come.
The one thing I think people should know is this: It's not about what you do for God. It's about what He already did for you.
At the age of about 12, I started questioning whether or not I was saved. I lived like a Christian.. so I kinda just kept doing what I was doing, and hoped to make it to heaven when I die. What I didn't know was that to truly be saved, you need to have a relationship with God. I didn't know God.. Nobody told me about a relationship with Him.. nobody taught me that nobody (including a Christian) is perfect. Nobody taught me that when I make a mistake, God will forgive me if I lived for Him, because He loves me so much. Nobody made God real to me.. or showed me WHO HE IS! Seeing the way "Christians" around me lived made me think that I might not need God. Nobody really relied on Him. Nobody took Him too seriously. Nobody gave me a reason to believe that God is enough.
When I turned 14 I went the total opposite. I was done with all the Christian crap. I hated going to church, I hated praying, and because I didn't know who God really was.. I started hating Him too. I fell into depression, started cutting, started smoking a bit of pot, eventually started thinking about suicide, and then attempting. Along this period of my life, I was going to a really great youth group though, and my youth pastor started making me think about things I've never ever thought about, he showed me what being a Christian is really about, and how God wants to have a relationship with me. I wouldn't really let it sink in too deep, or change me in any way, but God did start becoming more real to me. At my darkest moments I'd pray to God, and every time He'd answer my prayers and show me how much He loves me. For a bit I'd just kinda say thanks, but I'm still not sure about You, and I don't think You can save me, but God just kept sending people into my life, and doing things that would bring me a bit closer to Him each time, and finally one night I hit rock bottom. My parents told me they were divorcing, and my boyfriend left me. At this point I just wanted to go outside on that dark and rainy night, lay down in the dirt, and die.. but then I felt like God was telling me that He can still save me if I let Him, and I'd be able to rely on Him, because He loves me more than anyone in the world, and He would never EVER leave me! So I just cried out to Him, and told Him I wanted Him. I wanted to start a relationship with Him. I wanted to live for Him. I wanted to have hope, a reason to keep living, and a God that would be with me no matter where I am or what I'm going through. A God that will love me no matter what.That night I decided to follow God, and since then I have been filled with so much peace, hope, and joy. He has given me a reason to live, and I will follow Him no matter what the cost. I'm not going to lie.. Life still gets hard.. the past still brings me down sometimes, and my heart still isn't totally healed. but God gives me strength to get through hardships, reminds me that the past doesn't matter anymore and I'm not who I used to be, and I have faith that my heart will fully heal someday.. whether it be in this life, or in the life to come.
The one thing I think people should know is this: It's not about what you do for God. It's about what He already did for you.
My Name is Steve
I am 14 years old.Here is what I'm thanking God for:I came to Christ when I was 9. It was one of those they tell you to in Sunday School and you do it. Well I knew the Lord had forgiven me. And I thought that meant party, I could do all kinds of stuff and justask for forgivness and it would all be good. This went on for about 4 years. I got into some really bad stuff. Bad friends, lying, cheating, pornography, profanity. And I thought that if i asked God to forgive me he would butthenI'd go back the next day and do it again. But I always felt this void inside me. I thought maybe if I do more this void wll go away. But I was wrong. They one Sunday I realized that God knows when u are sicere and when you aren't. To tell you the truth that really freaked me out. I decided to start paying more attention in Church. I totaly changd. About 4 months ago I started the Left Behind series. It really freaked me out. I don't want to be left behind. So I made a decision, I'm going to apologize to God and ask him for help. Which was hard for me because I'm a pretty self-sufficient person. I am now thatnkful that God helps me live every day to the fullest. In every decision I make I ask God for help and guidance. So far he has set it upon my heart to use my musical abbilities to worship him he has also done this for some of my friends at church. We have formed a Christian Punk rock band. I am thankful for God's love and I want to live my life to serve him.
I am 14 years old.Here is what I'm thanking God for:I came to Christ when I was 9. It was one of those they tell you to in Sunday School and you do it. Well I knew the Lord had forgiven me. And I thought that meant party, I could do all kinds of stuff and justask for forgivness and it would all be good. This went on for about 4 years. I got into some really bad stuff. Bad friends, lying, cheating, pornography, profanity. And I thought that if i asked God to forgive me he would butthenI'd go back the next day and do it again. But I always felt this void inside me. I thought maybe if I do more this void wll go away. But I was wrong. They one Sunday I realized that God knows when u are sicere and when you aren't. To tell you the truth that really freaked me out. I decided to start paying more attention in Church. I totaly changd. About 4 months ago I started the Left Behind series. It really freaked me out. I don't want to be left behind. So I made a decision, I'm going to apologize to God and ask him for help. Which was hard for me because I'm a pretty self-sufficient person. I am now thatnkful that God helps me live every day to the fullest. In every decision I make I ask God for help and guidance. So far he has set it upon my heart to use my musical abbilities to worship him he has also done this for some of my friends at church. We have formed a Christian Punk rock band. I am thankful for God's love and I want to live my life to serve him.
Click to set custom HTML
These two videos above pretty much describe my life. Is there anyone else feeling this way ?
-Karen-
You may be in the same boat as me, you may be in a more depressing situation than I am, or you may be in a carefree place in life right now. Wherever you are, I think thankfulness is a trait that you and I need to develop in our lives. Not only does a thankful attitude alleviate negative thoughts, but possessing a thankful attitude is an obedient action toward God and his law.
The Bible passage I want to reflect on today is 2 Corinthians 2:14-17.
"But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the fragrance of the knowledge of him everywhere. For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life. Who is sufficient for these things? For we are not, like so many, peddlers of God's word, but as men of sincerity, as commissioned by God, in the sight of God we speak in Christ."
We are called to be a fragrance. A fragrance of the knowledge of God. How do you imagine that to smell like? Well the knowledge of God is so awesome, overwhelming, and beautiful. Are you spreading these fragrances to others? A fragrance holds mystery, attraction, and desire. As followers of Christ we are to elicit these characteristics. We are to cause people to wonder what secret we possess, we are to attract people to our traits that resemble Christ, and we are to evoke desire for Christ in others from how we live our life.
So how does thankfulness and the call to be a fragrance interact? I believe that a thankful attitude is the foundation to developing the fragrance of Christ. The world is already weary. What it needs is joy, contentment, peace, and thankfulness. Philippians 2:14-15 speaks about how one can be a light of the world:
"Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine in as lights in the world."
Although this verse doesn't explicitly point to thankfulness, it implies that we are to be thankful. If you abstain from one thing you need to be moving toward another. So if we abstain from grumbling, we need to be growing in thankfulness. This only makes sense.
So maybe you understand that thankfulness is the foundation to developing your fragrance, but you are confused as to how to even start becoming a thankful person. Do not worry. This whole month we are going to be looking at a variety of passages that talk about thankfulness and becoming a person who is thankful. Today I wanted to touch on the importance of thankfulness.
Thankfulness is a obedient response to our Lord.
"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
In the above verse, joy and thankfulness are bookending prayer. It is important to remember that prayer is a central part in the cultivation of thankfulness. Prayer allows you to dwell on the Lord and all the blessings he has bestowed upon you. It allows you to remember that you have a God to serve. Prayer takes the eyes off of yourself and onto the Lord and his will. Become a prayerful person and I think you will become a thankful person.
Thankfulness alleviates negative thoughts.
"And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful." (Colossians 3:15)
Thankfulness flows from a heart that is at peace with Christ. You need to let the truth of Christ rest in your heart. No matter what stresses come your way, peace with God and thankfulness need to be present. I have realized myself over these past couple months that I cannot obtain peace with God if I'm lacking in thankfulness. I cannot explain why, but I have seen that pattern arise in my life. When I was keeping a gratefulness journal I remember the sweet peace I experienced and I don't think that would have occurred if I was not actively pursuing thankfulness.
Thankfulness allows us to be fragrances of Christ.
"For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing.." (2 Corinthians 2:15)
We have the opportunity to bless our brothers and sisters in Christ by having a thankful attitude and challenging them to thank God in all circumstances. We can remind them of God's truth and the many blessings we do have in Christ.
We also have the opportunity to bless those who are unsaved. We have the opportunity to shine as lights in the darkness by being thankful. This gives us reason to share the joy we have and bring others to the knowledge of our Lord and Savior.
Thankfulness is contagious and I hope you know have some knowledge of it's importance. As we continue learning about thankfulness this month, I encourage you to start a gratefulness journal, a daily praise session, or grab an accountability partner and reflect upon God's promises and truths together. Whatever it is, get in the habit of thankfulness.
Being different matters
Good Morning friends! Today I am struggling to keep my eyes open and my attitude
pleasing unto the Lord. It is a Monday and I have a daunting week ahead as you
probably do too. However, let me encourage you to put the Lord FIRST this week.
Oh how sweet it is to rest in Jesus! Today I want to talk to you about something
that has been weighing on my heart for a long time. It might not be perfectly
clear because I am still processing in my head and it takes me a while to fully
develop opinions or the decision of what is fully right and wrong. I will just
touch on what has been bothering me and then hopefully God will give me clarity
eventually on this matter.
"Beloved, I urge you as sojourners
and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against
your soul."(1 Peter 2:11)
"For God has not called us for
impurity, but in holiness." (1 Thessalonians 4:7)
Too often have I seen myself cave
into the world and its temptations. Too often have I become apathetic to the
sinful condition of the world. Too often have I ignored God's call to be holy. I
bet you can relate with me. We are sinful humans, of course we fall short of
God's standard. However, we cannot continue to live in our futile ways. God has
called us for so much more.
He
has called us to holiness. What does this look like? Holiness is the opposite of
impurity. That is why we are called to abstain from passions of the flesh. You
have to acknowledge that you are surrounded by impurity. We live in the world,
of course we will encounter many impure situations day in and day out. God has
called us to rise above the impurity of this life. He has called us to represent
him in all circumstances.
"Therefore
be imitators of God, as beloved children...But sexual immorality and all
impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among
saints." (Ephesians 5:1, 3)
I
know this is easier said than done, but in all honesty, do you even try? I can
admit that at times I say these words and then allow sin to slip into my life
without even putting up a guard. We want people to like us, we want to be in the
"in crowd", we want to be at peace with everyone, etc. I am saddened by how we
as Christians allow this world to shape us. I am saddened by how we as
Christians watch as others sin and we don't even challenge others to step up to
God's call to be holy.
"For
this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you
through the laying on of my hands, for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of
power and love and self-control." (2 Timothy 1:6-7)
Paul is exhorting us to be full with the
fire of God. Let the passions of God lead your life. Let his standards be your
guide. Do not allow the things of this world to quench the fire that is within
you. Share the good news of Christ, encourage other believers to continue
following Christ, if you see a brother or sister in sin, urge them to repent,
allow yourself to be open to the voice of the Holy Spirit and follow his
calling. God has placed a flame inside each one of his children. Find that flame
and keep it burning. Do not let temptations, sins, or distractions cool the
flame. Protect the fire and let it take over your life.
I know it can be hard to live the life
that God has called you to live. Holiness is God's perfect standard and none of
us can measure up. Yesterday I was watching a sermon by Nancy Lee DeMoss (if you
want the summary or the link just check out my previous blog post), and she was
saying that once you see God for who he really is, you begin to see yourself for
who you really are.
"In
the year that King Uzziah died I saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and
lifted up, and the train of his robe filled the temple...And I said; 'Woe is me!
For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips and I dwell in the midst of a
people of unclean lips; for my eyes have see the King, the LORD of hosts!'"
(Isaiah 6:1, 5)
Realizing
that we are unworthy to be in God's presence is a humbling thought. Reflecting
on God's glory is necessary in order to obtain an obedient heart. Seeing that
God is to be praised in every day situations will lead us to lay aside the
things of this world and pursue a life of holiness. Our flame will increase day
in and day out if we are bowing at the Lord's feet on a continual basis. Seek
the Lord, worship the Lord, and in all your ways glorify the Lord, for he is
worthy.
Posted by
Leah
H
Have any of you lost
something/someone dear to you? It doesn't have to just be a loved one passing
away... It can be a loved one steering off the path of light. It can be a loss
of a dream. It can be a breakup. It can also be losing a treasure of yours,
simple though they may be.
I'm sure we all can
relate to losing something or someone dear to us. There are dreams I had to put
aside due to my family's struggles. I've watched a brother go to darkness. I've
even gotten the more usual situation that people associate with mourning, I lost
my grandfather to emphysema, a friend of the family to a moped accident, a cat
that I connected with to my grandfather, then, more recently, my own
grandmother. But, no matter what you lose... there is a mourning process, and
adjustments to make in life.
But, in these areas
of loss you must be grateful to God, and move on. Yes, you must mourn, that is
the only way to reach a peace. Mourn the death of anything, anyone, then give
thanks to the LORD. You'll find it freeing, and a beautiful thing to
behold.
That someone is God. He cares :)
"Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him."- James 1:12
I know I am happy and excited because God has been working on my heart these past few weeks and has given me a new love and passion for his name. My constant prayer is that I will fall deeply in love with Him all the days of my life. I hope this is your prayer too. God has created you for an intimate relationship with Him and I would suggest pursuing after one. Nothing is greater than being in love with your Creator, King, and Heavenly Father!! Take this truth and practice it throughout this new year.
For the start of the new year I thought it would be nice to have another blog series. Now don't worry. If you miss one or two (or three or four) blogs, this doesn't mean you'll have to read multiple postings to know what the point of each post is about. In this series I want to study the book of James more in depth. The book of James has always been my favorite book of the Bible because it is filled with practical applications for Christians. It is good to remember that doing "good" things will not make God love you. God has saved us while we were still sinners. We are saved not by our good works, but by faith and grace alone. So don't put your faith in your "good" works. However, as a Christian we are commanded to obey God. The book of James is filled of many ways one can put his or her faith into action. This series is going to take about three months or so, but I am excited to delve into the book and let God come work in my heart.
Alright so let's jump right into the text. Either before or after reading this, I encourage you to read James 1:1-18 because that is the focus of my blog today. This passage is the famous passage for "counting it all joy" when you are faced with hardships. To start out, I want you to think about the last trial you have faced. Trials come in many shapes and sizes. There are deaths, break-ups, temptations, spiritual battles, fights, sicknesses, financial trouble, friend problems, etc. Why would anyone take joy in one of those mentioned? James continues to point out that our faith is made stronger due to those trials. During a hardship we don't want to hear that our faith is being strengthened, but after the fact we can look back and see the amazing works God has done through that experience. He uses the trials of life because it is during these hard times that our pride is broken and we see that we cannot do life on our own. God uses trials of this life because he wants us to see his power and strength through the good AND bad times. He wants us to see that he is faithful no matter our circumstance, that he is bigger than it all.
Now this specific section of James gives us some examples of trials that might arise in life. He gives us an example of a man full of doubts, cannot make decisions, and does not trust the Lord. Another sad example is about a man who is too rich that he falls away from the love of God because he's so caught up in his own treasures. And finally the last example which is a reality for everyone of us is about the temptations of this world and how they try to kill whoever they trap.
The doubting man is compared to a wave on the sea. Everyone has a concept of how this relates. The ocean can be very powerful and dangerous because the wind controls which direction the waves blow as well as the pace and frequency of the waves. When doubt controls one's life it can become dangerous and careless. You will not know what to believe, how to act, or have confidence in Christ. The solution to doubt is found in verse five. We are to ask God for wisdom and he will answer. God's wisdom will be our foundation for a life of faith.
Another sad illustration found in this passage is of a man wasting his life for frivolous pursuits. This passage reminds us that beauty is temporal, the riches of the world will not last, and the search for these earthly treasures destroys one's relationship with God. Humility is the key to protecting against unhealthy attachment to our beauty, treasures, etc. Another great Bible verse to remember concerning this topic is Matthew 6:19-21, "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earthy, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Temptation is a major test of our faith. Temptations arise daily but give us no justification for our sin. Many people blame Satan for tempting them and causing them to sin. James says that each of us is tempted by our own sinful desires. Temptation is very serious. It slowly kills those who give into the enticement. Realize that you are a sinful human being and need God's help to resist temptation. It is possible to resist. As hard, as inviting as the temptation may seem, God is stronger and will allow you to turn away. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." Realize and specify your temptations, ask God for help, maybe seek an accountability partner, and continue to look for ways to resist the devil and sin.
There is hope and encouragement in this passage. God is the giver of all perfect and good gifts, he bestows them upon those who are faithful to him. He offers a "crown of life" to those who persevere during the trials of life and who continue to love him. The other amazing truth in James 1:17 speaks of God's unchanging character. We are humans who fail constantly and it is comforting to know that God is a strong anchor. He is the foundation of all peace, truth, love, and victory.
I know I am happy and excited because God has been working on my heart these past few weeks and has given me a new love and passion for his name. My constant prayer is that I will fall deeply in love with Him all the days of my life. I hope this is your prayer too. God has created you for an intimate relationship with Him and I would suggest pursuing after one. Nothing is greater than being in love with your Creator, King, and Heavenly Father!! Take this truth and practice it throughout this new year.
For the start of the new year I thought it would be nice to have another blog series. Now don't worry. If you miss one or two (or three or four) blogs, this doesn't mean you'll have to read multiple postings to know what the point of each post is about. In this series I want to study the book of James more in depth. The book of James has always been my favorite book of the Bible because it is filled with practical applications for Christians. It is good to remember that doing "good" things will not make God love you. God has saved us while we were still sinners. We are saved not by our good works, but by faith and grace alone. So don't put your faith in your "good" works. However, as a Christian we are commanded to obey God. The book of James is filled of many ways one can put his or her faith into action. This series is going to take about three months or so, but I am excited to delve into the book and let God come work in my heart.
Alright so let's jump right into the text. Either before or after reading this, I encourage you to read James 1:1-18 because that is the focus of my blog today. This passage is the famous passage for "counting it all joy" when you are faced with hardships. To start out, I want you to think about the last trial you have faced. Trials come in many shapes and sizes. There are deaths, break-ups, temptations, spiritual battles, fights, sicknesses, financial trouble, friend problems, etc. Why would anyone take joy in one of those mentioned? James continues to point out that our faith is made stronger due to those trials. During a hardship we don't want to hear that our faith is being strengthened, but after the fact we can look back and see the amazing works God has done through that experience. He uses the trials of life because it is during these hard times that our pride is broken and we see that we cannot do life on our own. God uses trials of this life because he wants us to see his power and strength through the good AND bad times. He wants us to see that he is faithful no matter our circumstance, that he is bigger than it all.
Now this specific section of James gives us some examples of trials that might arise in life. He gives us an example of a man full of doubts, cannot make decisions, and does not trust the Lord. Another sad example is about a man who is too rich that he falls away from the love of God because he's so caught up in his own treasures. And finally the last example which is a reality for everyone of us is about the temptations of this world and how they try to kill whoever they trap.
The doubting man is compared to a wave on the sea. Everyone has a concept of how this relates. The ocean can be very powerful and dangerous because the wind controls which direction the waves blow as well as the pace and frequency of the waves. When doubt controls one's life it can become dangerous and careless. You will not know what to believe, how to act, or have confidence in Christ. The solution to doubt is found in verse five. We are to ask God for wisdom and he will answer. God's wisdom will be our foundation for a life of faith.
Another sad illustration found in this passage is of a man wasting his life for frivolous pursuits. This passage reminds us that beauty is temporal, the riches of the world will not last, and the search for these earthly treasures destroys one's relationship with God. Humility is the key to protecting against unhealthy attachment to our beauty, treasures, etc. Another great Bible verse to remember concerning this topic is Matthew 6:19-21, "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earthy, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Temptation is a major test of our faith. Temptations arise daily but give us no justification for our sin. Many people blame Satan for tempting them and causing them to sin. James says that each of us is tempted by our own sinful desires. Temptation is very serious. It slowly kills those who give into the enticement. Realize that you are a sinful human being and need God's help to resist temptation. It is possible to resist. As hard, as inviting as the temptation may seem, God is stronger and will allow you to turn away. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." Realize and specify your temptations, ask God for help, maybe seek an accountability partner, and continue to look for ways to resist the devil and sin.
There is hope and encouragement in this passage. God is the giver of all perfect and good gifts, he bestows them upon those who are faithful to him. He offers a "crown of life" to those who persevere during the trials of life and who continue to love him. The other amazing truth in James 1:17 speaks of God's unchanging character. We are humans who fail constantly and it is comforting to know that God is a strong anchor. He is the foundation of all peace, truth, love, and victory.
From Jess White:
Testimony: Since I was born I was always taken to church with my parents, when I was 12 my mum got ordained(became a vicar) and I went to her church for a bit, but at the time I thought that God was only for old people, anyway when I was 12 I went on a christian camp and while I was there someone was talking about having a personal relationship with God and how just going to church and say the our father didnt get us into heaven and something came over me and I gave my life to God then.I went home and for the first few weeks was really pumped on God, however the next two years were the hardest of my life, my parents had just split up, my brother had behaviour problems and it took a long time to get him diagnosed we now know he has asperge syndrome, someone really close to me who id always been told was supposed to be a role model to me had a battle with alcohol and my relationship with my father began to completley break down. I got told that I worthless and the reason for all of my home problems and that I shouldnt have been born, I started to believe it and think that God had put me on earth by accident that he had died for everyone but me and there was no plan for me, i started to hate myself and wish my life away. and although I did believe in God and knew he was there I started to underestimate him and think he had some hate plan against me. I went to another camp at new year and it completeley changed my outlook because someone asked a general question as they were preaching, How can you restore your realtionship with God? and it suddenly hit me that, I needed to fully let God soften my heartas I'd stopped walking where God led me for fear of being hurt again, for fear it wouldnt work out and I just suddenly understand if God said do it he would protect me "true he wounds but he dresses the wound, the same hand that hurts you heals you"(Job) and the other thing was to start believing God over my life, I believed he could do miracles for everyone but me, that he would bring happiness to every but me and he had died and had plans for everyone else. Then the pain and hurt I fel was wiped away and I was suddenly able to overcome and end things I'd been struggling with. Also I there was this voice from God in my head saying, all my problems didnt need to be fixed I could be happy and love my life anway because God wants me to, since then things have still been hard, After I knew one of the things I needed to do was try again witht the person who was an alcoholic and for a month they stopped drinking but then they suddenly started again and started ripping me apart and breaking me apart again and God said to me dont hate them distance yourself from it before it got to far again. But hes also poured out so much blessing because Ive been able to accept that I am someone and I shouldnt feel wrong because I live for my god, because I'm happy or because I know he has a future in store for me. Id been struggling with fidning a church I was comftorbale in and wanted to be in, a few months after I found a church. God healed all the pain I had that no one else could and just showed me that things werent all for nothing and even when everything seems dark that he is there and i can go to him wherever, I started to doubt if he could change certain things and if I should keep hoping for thing and I read in matthew a few weeks after "Everything ranging from small to large gets included as part of your prayer as you lay hold of God with a believing heart" and it said to me keep praying for it keep looking for a way everything is possible. Im thanking God because hes put up with me doubting and challenging and questioning him for 2 1/2 years and still was ready to transform me and my life as soon as I let him in fully and that he wiped away anger and hurt that no one else had been able to and that not once did he give up on me.
From Dustin Rhodes:
Testimony: My family use to go to church when I was little. We stopped going when I was about six. We would go but I never went for God's word. I only went because my parents made me and they had good food. I was a bad kid, swearing and quick tempered, from age six to twelve. But, of course, not in front of adults. One of my friends would tell me to stop or I will go to hell. I never listened to him. Then, the summer when I was twelve, my aunt, who was and still is the youth minister at the church I now attend, invited me to a summer vacation bible school. I did not want to go and waste my summer at church but I went because I had nothing else to do that summer. It turned out to be a blast and that summer I accepted Christ. I am now sixteen and attend a baptist church. My aunt that lead me to the Lord is my youth minister. I have now been looking to form a Christian Rock Band. It is to my aunt, and of course Jesus that I owe my life too.
From Becca:
Testimony: Well, umm I had always been brought up in a Christian background. My two older brothers were Christians. Ever since I was little I always attended church and all other organization to do with church. I asked God into my heart at a young age but struggled with the commitment of being a Christian.
Just over a year and a bit ago I was quite depressed and drifted so far away from God, Im now disgusted at how bad i have treated him in my past. I was being bullied just for being myself and instead of coming to God as should of I dropped out of many organizations I had been involved in. I often felt like God wasn't there in that point of my life, but he must have if I was able to get through it.
Only since September 03 I sort of realised and come close to God but I was still sort of holding him at arms length. I rejoined all the clubs and things I had been in and learned so much. In November 2003 I went with my youth group called impact to a weekend teen Christian event c alled autumn soul. I knew what I had been missing and came close to God, it was good knowing he was there. But I still hadn't fully achieved a good relationship causes in my head my past still lurked, I wasn't fully able to commit I suppose at that point. I went through school this year few knowing I was a Christian, I was meek even when I know I should of been singing his praises to my friends in school, trying to get them to realize Gods love for them.
Really only these past few days starting on the 26th August 2004, today in fact I really hugged him tightly close to me. We had a youth group from Dublin staying up with us and I saw how committed they were and how obvious it was that God was in their life. I confided in a new friend Jan about my past and my relationship with God and all of a sudden an inner calm filled me. I really want to thank God for providing such an opportunity and a faithful servant to talk to me. I now feel powerful and as I return to school I want to speak of his love for us all.
I know this testimony is very short and I wouldn't be able to do it in front of a church yet but I wanted to share my experience with you. I know I'll still have times of trouble but God will always be with me and I know that now and want everyone else to know that no matter what happens God will always be there for you. Look at the way I treated him in the past but now he has forgiven. I believe overcoming my past will make me stronger, stronger in my faith in God. Love becca. God bless you!! P.U.S.H. I know God would want me to search this now. I'm ready to be his servant.
Testimony: Since I was born I was always taken to church with my parents, when I was 12 my mum got ordained(became a vicar) and I went to her church for a bit, but at the time I thought that God was only for old people, anyway when I was 12 I went on a christian camp and while I was there someone was talking about having a personal relationship with God and how just going to church and say the our father didnt get us into heaven and something came over me and I gave my life to God then.I went home and for the first few weeks was really pumped on God, however the next two years were the hardest of my life, my parents had just split up, my brother had behaviour problems and it took a long time to get him diagnosed we now know he has asperge syndrome, someone really close to me who id always been told was supposed to be a role model to me had a battle with alcohol and my relationship with my father began to completley break down. I got told that I worthless and the reason for all of my home problems and that I shouldnt have been born, I started to believe it and think that God had put me on earth by accident that he had died for everyone but me and there was no plan for me, i started to hate myself and wish my life away. and although I did believe in God and knew he was there I started to underestimate him and think he had some hate plan against me. I went to another camp at new year and it completeley changed my outlook because someone asked a general question as they were preaching, How can you restore your realtionship with God? and it suddenly hit me that, I needed to fully let God soften my heartas I'd stopped walking where God led me for fear of being hurt again, for fear it wouldnt work out and I just suddenly understand if God said do it he would protect me "true he wounds but he dresses the wound, the same hand that hurts you heals you"(Job) and the other thing was to start believing God over my life, I believed he could do miracles for everyone but me, that he would bring happiness to every but me and he had died and had plans for everyone else. Then the pain and hurt I fel was wiped away and I was suddenly able to overcome and end things I'd been struggling with. Also I there was this voice from God in my head saying, all my problems didnt need to be fixed I could be happy and love my life anway because God wants me to, since then things have still been hard, After I knew one of the things I needed to do was try again witht the person who was an alcoholic and for a month they stopped drinking but then they suddenly started again and started ripping me apart and breaking me apart again and God said to me dont hate them distance yourself from it before it got to far again. But hes also poured out so much blessing because Ive been able to accept that I am someone and I shouldnt feel wrong because I live for my god, because I'm happy or because I know he has a future in store for me. Id been struggling with fidning a church I was comftorbale in and wanted to be in, a few months after I found a church. God healed all the pain I had that no one else could and just showed me that things werent all for nothing and even when everything seems dark that he is there and i can go to him wherever, I started to doubt if he could change certain things and if I should keep hoping for thing and I read in matthew a few weeks after "Everything ranging from small to large gets included as part of your prayer as you lay hold of God with a believing heart" and it said to me keep praying for it keep looking for a way everything is possible. Im thanking God because hes put up with me doubting and challenging and questioning him for 2 1/2 years and still was ready to transform me and my life as soon as I let him in fully and that he wiped away anger and hurt that no one else had been able to and that not once did he give up on me.
From Dustin Rhodes:
Testimony: My family use to go to church when I was little. We stopped going when I was about six. We would go but I never went for God's word. I only went because my parents made me and they had good food. I was a bad kid, swearing and quick tempered, from age six to twelve. But, of course, not in front of adults. One of my friends would tell me to stop or I will go to hell. I never listened to him. Then, the summer when I was twelve, my aunt, who was and still is the youth minister at the church I now attend, invited me to a summer vacation bible school. I did not want to go and waste my summer at church but I went because I had nothing else to do that summer. It turned out to be a blast and that summer I accepted Christ. I am now sixteen and attend a baptist church. My aunt that lead me to the Lord is my youth minister. I have now been looking to form a Christian Rock Band. It is to my aunt, and of course Jesus that I owe my life too.
From Becca:
Testimony: Well, umm I had always been brought up in a Christian background. My two older brothers were Christians. Ever since I was little I always attended church and all other organization to do with church. I asked God into my heart at a young age but struggled with the commitment of being a Christian.
Just over a year and a bit ago I was quite depressed and drifted so far away from God, Im now disgusted at how bad i have treated him in my past. I was being bullied just for being myself and instead of coming to God as should of I dropped out of many organizations I had been involved in. I often felt like God wasn't there in that point of my life, but he must have if I was able to get through it.
Only since September 03 I sort of realised and come close to God but I was still sort of holding him at arms length. I rejoined all the clubs and things I had been in and learned so much. In November 2003 I went with my youth group called impact to a weekend teen Christian event c alled autumn soul. I knew what I had been missing and came close to God, it was good knowing he was there. But I still hadn't fully achieved a good relationship causes in my head my past still lurked, I wasn't fully able to commit I suppose at that point. I went through school this year few knowing I was a Christian, I was meek even when I know I should of been singing his praises to my friends in school, trying to get them to realize Gods love for them.
Really only these past few days starting on the 26th August 2004, today in fact I really hugged him tightly close to me. We had a youth group from Dublin staying up with us and I saw how committed they were and how obvious it was that God was in their life. I confided in a new friend Jan about my past and my relationship with God and all of a sudden an inner calm filled me. I really want to thank God for providing such an opportunity and a faithful servant to talk to me. I now feel powerful and as I return to school I want to speak of his love for us all.
I know this testimony is very short and I wouldn't be able to do it in front of a church yet but I wanted to share my experience with you. I know I'll still have times of trouble but God will always be with me and I know that now and want everyone else to know that no matter what happens God will always be there for you. Look at the way I treated him in the past but now he has forgiven. I believe overcoming my past will make me stronger, stronger in my faith in God. Love becca. God bless you!! P.U.S.H. I know God would want me to search this now. I'm ready to be his servant.
Before you tell Buck about the beam in his eye you might want to
consider removing the speck from
yours.
consider removing the speck from
yours.
Click on comic to display controls
"The new kid"
"The divorce"
"Peer Pressure"
THE SNEEZE - A true story from a recent high school grad in eastern Canada
They walked in tandem, each of the ninety-two students filing into the already crowded auditorium. With their rich maroon gowns flowing and the traditional caps, they looked almost as grown up as they felt.
Dads swallowed hard behind broad smiles, and Moms freely brushed away tears.
This class would NOT pray during the commencements, not by choice, but because of a recent court ruling prohibiting it.
The principal and several students were careful to stay within the guidelines allowed by the ruling. They gave inspirational and challenging speeches, but no one mentioned divine guidance and no one asked for blessings on the graduates or their families.
The speeches were nice, but they were routine until the final speech received a standing ovation.
A solitary student walked proudly to the microphone. He stood still and silent for just a moment, and then, it happened.
All 92 students, every single one of them, suddenly SNEEZED !!!!
The student on stage simply looked at the audience and said,
'GOD BLESS YOU'
And he walked off the stage...
The audience exploded into applause. This graduating class had found a unique way to invoke God's blessing on their future with or without the court's approval.
Isn't this a wonderful story? Pass it on to all your friends.........and
GOD BLESS YOU!!!!
They walked in tandem, each of the ninety-two students filing into the already crowded auditorium. With their rich maroon gowns flowing and the traditional caps, they looked almost as grown up as they felt.
Dads swallowed hard behind broad smiles, and Moms freely brushed away tears.
This class would NOT pray during the commencements, not by choice, but because of a recent court ruling prohibiting it.
The principal and several students were careful to stay within the guidelines allowed by the ruling. They gave inspirational and challenging speeches, but no one mentioned divine guidance and no one asked for blessings on the graduates or their families.
The speeches were nice, but they were routine until the final speech received a standing ovation.
A solitary student walked proudly to the microphone. He stood still and silent for just a moment, and then, it happened.
All 92 students, every single one of them, suddenly SNEEZED !!!!
The student on stage simply looked at the audience and said,
'GOD BLESS YOU'
And he walked off the stage...
The audience exploded into applause. This graduating class had found a unique way to invoke God's blessing on their future with or without the court's approval.
Isn't this a wonderful story? Pass it on to all your friends.........and
GOD BLESS YOU!!!!
To
Write Love on Her Heart
By:
Arianna Joy Fowler(Schaffer)
She
cringes in the shadows
Alone...unloved...hopeless
Bloodstained
marks, which mars her heart
Scars
her arms ever deep
She
is less? She is more?
Her
heart is marred and torn
What
time is it?
Time
for freedom?
God
has set her free!
And
written love on her heart!
Write Love on Her Heart
By:
Arianna Joy Fowler(Schaffer)
She
cringes in the shadows
Alone...unloved...hopeless
Bloodstained
marks, which mars her heart
Scars
her arms ever deep
She
is less? She is more?
Her
heart is marred and torn
What
time is it?
Time
for freedom?
God
has set her free!
And
written love on her heart!
Fairytale
Written on 3/13/13
There You stood before anything
You were, You are, You will always be
There You stand
Arms outstretched to me
You receive my hand
O, Lord You dance with Your love
You’re more than I could ever express
This is more than a fairytale
Here I am
And there You are
You made me to love You
And I used to be so far
Like sleeping Beauty
Nothing could wake me
But that One true love’s kiss
Your breath fills my lungs
O, my soul I am received
Received to a dance!
So much more than a fairytale!
There is an Ever After
But, we must choose, we must now decide
Here I am
My arms lifted high
O, Lord You raise high Your love
You’re more than I could ever express
This is more than a fairytale
Written on 3/13/13
There You stood before anything
You were, You are, You will always be
There You stand
Arms outstretched to me
You receive my hand
O, Lord You dance with Your love
You’re more than I could ever express
This is more than a fairytale
Here I am
And there You are
You made me to love You
And I used to be so far
Like sleeping Beauty
Nothing could wake me
But that One true love’s kiss
Your breath fills my lungs
O, my soul I am received
Received to a dance!
So much more than a fairytale!
There is an Ever After
But, we must choose, we must now decide
Here I am
My arms lifted high
O, Lord You raise high Your love
You’re more than I could ever express
This is more than a fairytale
May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace. What then? Are we to sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification. Romans 6:14-19
NOTES:
I felt so distant from my parents more than ever. My parents think I'm not somebody, but I know that, I am somebody on God's eyes. I tried and tried to tell them how I really feel. I did. But my parents yet still think that I have the spirit of deception. Do I posses that? If I do, may God forgive me, and cleanse me from all my secret faults.
At one point, I could do nothing but shed tears. Even now, I still shed tears. My wound was becoming more open than ever. My mom said that God is no longer on my side, because I'm a disobedient child. Am I as stubborn as they say I am? Is God still on my side? I still feel that God is still here witnessing all that happen
ed to me. I'm sure of it. I need him now more than ever.
But I felt like I'm a curse to my parents and sister.
I felt like I disgraced my family. They think that I don't care about my future, when I do. They will one day kick me out, and have nowhere to go. Well that's what they said. Right now I feel so hurt, that I don't want to talk my parents again. I feel so hurt that I can't even open up to them anymore. I sometimes felt like killing myself because the situation with my family is too much for me to bear. My parents keep saying that I'm deceiving myself, and that I won't go anywhere. I don't want my family near me nor around me. And I feel like that I don't want to talk to them anymore, because they don't hear me out.
One day, my mom talked to me. She asked me, "Do you know that we love you?" . I couldn't say anything at first (I don't like it when I do that). She asked me that again, and I said 50% (because of what happened yesterday). She said that if the school kicks me out, she'll kick me out of the house for good, and end up in the streets. That's when I knew that my parents actually don't want me around. She then compared me to others, and used the past circumstances that happened to me. And she said that it is better that they don't have me around the house, so that I don't bring shame to them.
What kind of mother would kick her own child out of the house?
I didn't feel safe anymore. I tried to explain what really happened to me, but she won't listen. I don't know if I should tell them anything again. Right now, they don't want me around. They want me to rot in the streets. They want me out of the house, and their lives. They don't want anything to do with me. I was not trying to challenge them, I told them their flaws, but they simply shun them.
I knew it. They don't want me. They don't want me at all. They don't want me around anymore.
Yesterday, my dad is going to write an email to the school, and he's going to send it to this afternoon. I don't know if I should go back to school or not. Maybe it's best I don't, since for one, I hate public schools, and two, those "teachers" are not even bothered hearing my side of the story.
And if I ever go back to that school again, I do not want to see their faces again. Ever! (Not that I want them to die, but that I don't want to talk to them ever again, because they practically ruined my life.)
I wish I was home-schooled.
I still didn't say a thing to my dad, apart from the started an argument over a bottle of ketchup (which is just pointless).
I may be thinking of quitting school, cos I hate that school. If my parents want me out of their lives, that's fine by me, cos I don't know how the heck am I supposed to respect them after what they did to me. (My dad nearly beat me up, mind you)
I felt like dropping school but I don't know if its the best thing. I still don't want to tell my parents anything. Because whenever I try to talk with either my mom or dad, it's has been fire and brimstone from them, to the point my mom was like "Shut up before the wrath of God will fall upon you!" (something like that).
My mom tried to smash a bowl on my head recently. If she did that, I would have been dead by now. My mom really wants me dead. I didn't feel safe anymore. They wanted me out of the house.
My dad asked me the question again, I calmly came up with a solution to resolve the issue, but I think they dismissed it.
After my dad talked to me, my mom said that she regretted having me, and that I'm a disgrace to Christianity, the family and to the Word of God. And that I should be ashamed of myself.
Now I'm was not so happy. Now I know they don't want me at all.
I was possessed all that time. When that happened, I had no idea. The name-calling, judging, nearly killed with a bowl, parents want me to be out of the house, those never helped me. After a long discussion, I finally opened up to my dad. And when I was asked "Are you ready for a change?", before I could anything, the thoughts of name-calling, judging and all the rest, began to run through my head, that I became so numb. But by the time I was prayed for, I could not even control myself. In fact that demon was screaming out of my body. The last thing I know, I woke up and I found myself on the floor.
You know what? That day, Jesus set me free, from that horrible chain that made me miserable all my life.
I'm finally free. Free from that demon that made me miserable. The name-calling stopped, the judging stopped, everything just ended.
After that, my parents stopped abusing me, they stopped name-calling me, and as for the teachers, well, they'll her me out for sure.
All this while, the devil was trying to destroy my family, but his plan failed. BIG TIME!
All of it its over.
Things are beginning to grow better in my family. THANKS BE TO GOD!
To all the Christians and teens who are battling with this sort of situation, and it's too much for you to handle, simply turn to God. He will deliver you. He will carry you from your sinking sand, to His solid ground. Never let the devil take advantage of you or even destroy you.
NOTES:
I felt so distant from my parents more than ever. My parents think I'm not somebody, but I know that, I am somebody on God's eyes. I tried and tried to tell them how I really feel. I did. But my parents yet still think that I have the spirit of deception. Do I posses that? If I do, may God forgive me, and cleanse me from all my secret faults.
At one point, I could do nothing but shed tears. Even now, I still shed tears. My wound was becoming more open than ever. My mom said that God is no longer on my side, because I'm a disobedient child. Am I as stubborn as they say I am? Is God still on my side? I still feel that God is still here witnessing all that happen
ed to me. I'm sure of it. I need him now more than ever.
But I felt like I'm a curse to my parents and sister.
I felt like I disgraced my family. They think that I don't care about my future, when I do. They will one day kick me out, and have nowhere to go. Well that's what they said. Right now I feel so hurt, that I don't want to talk my parents again. I feel so hurt that I can't even open up to them anymore. I sometimes felt like killing myself because the situation with my family is too much for me to bear. My parents keep saying that I'm deceiving myself, and that I won't go anywhere. I don't want my family near me nor around me. And I feel like that I don't want to talk to them anymore, because they don't hear me out.
One day, my mom talked to me. She asked me, "Do you know that we love you?" . I couldn't say anything at first (I don't like it when I do that). She asked me that again, and I said 50% (because of what happened yesterday). She said that if the school kicks me out, she'll kick me out of the house for good, and end up in the streets. That's when I knew that my parents actually don't want me around. She then compared me to others, and used the past circumstances that happened to me. And she said that it is better that they don't have me around the house, so that I don't bring shame to them.
What kind of mother would kick her own child out of the house?
I didn't feel safe anymore. I tried to explain what really happened to me, but she won't listen. I don't know if I should tell them anything again. Right now, they don't want me around. They want me to rot in the streets. They want me out of the house, and their lives. They don't want anything to do with me. I was not trying to challenge them, I told them their flaws, but they simply shun them.
I knew it. They don't want me. They don't want me at all. They don't want me around anymore.
Yesterday, my dad is going to write an email to the school, and he's going to send it to this afternoon. I don't know if I should go back to school or not. Maybe it's best I don't, since for one, I hate public schools, and two, those "teachers" are not even bothered hearing my side of the story.
And if I ever go back to that school again, I do not want to see their faces again. Ever! (Not that I want them to die, but that I don't want to talk to them ever again, because they practically ruined my life.)
I wish I was home-schooled.
I still didn't say a thing to my dad, apart from the started an argument over a bottle of ketchup (which is just pointless).
I may be thinking of quitting school, cos I hate that school. If my parents want me out of their lives, that's fine by me, cos I don't know how the heck am I supposed to respect them after what they did to me. (My dad nearly beat me up, mind you)
I felt like dropping school but I don't know if its the best thing. I still don't want to tell my parents anything. Because whenever I try to talk with either my mom or dad, it's has been fire and brimstone from them, to the point my mom was like "Shut up before the wrath of God will fall upon you!" (something like that).
My mom tried to smash a bowl on my head recently. If she did that, I would have been dead by now. My mom really wants me dead. I didn't feel safe anymore. They wanted me out of the house.
My dad asked me the question again, I calmly came up with a solution to resolve the issue, but I think they dismissed it.
After my dad talked to me, my mom said that she regretted having me, and that I'm a disgrace to Christianity, the family and to the Word of God. And that I should be ashamed of myself.
Now I'm was not so happy. Now I know they don't want me at all.
I was possessed all that time. When that happened, I had no idea. The name-calling, judging, nearly killed with a bowl, parents want me to be out of the house, those never helped me. After a long discussion, I finally opened up to my dad. And when I was asked "Are you ready for a change?", before I could anything, the thoughts of name-calling, judging and all the rest, began to run through my head, that I became so numb. But by the time I was prayed for, I could not even control myself. In fact that demon was screaming out of my body. The last thing I know, I woke up and I found myself on the floor.
You know what? That day, Jesus set me free, from that horrible chain that made me miserable all my life.
I'm finally free. Free from that demon that made me miserable. The name-calling stopped, the judging stopped, everything just ended.
After that, my parents stopped abusing me, they stopped name-calling me, and as for the teachers, well, they'll her me out for sure.
All this while, the devil was trying to destroy my family, but his plan failed. BIG TIME!
All of it its over.
Things are beginning to grow better in my family. THANKS BE TO GOD!
To all the Christians and teens who are battling with this sort of situation, and it's too much for you to handle, simply turn to God. He will deliver you. He will carry you from your sinking sand, to His solid ground. Never let the devil take advantage of you or even destroy you.
For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile. Romans 1:16
So here's a short story-line:
Boy#1: *laughing to scorn* Just look at her. Another one of those Jesus freaks.
Boy#2: Oh her? *laughs out of mockery* She's a freak alright
Girl#1: *pointing* You girl are gonna be nobody in life! HA HA
Girl#2: *laughing* Go back to where you belong, you hate spreader.
Adult: You are a delusion!! *evil laughs*
Girl with the Bible: Lord, forgive them. They don't know what they are doing. I know I have a future ahead of me. And Lord, despite what other may do to me, I will serve you with every breath that I take. *putting a determined face on* And I am not, and never will be ashamed of the Gospel of Christ, no matter what the enemy throws at me.
NOTES:
Here's my story. At the age of 16, I decided to stop hiding my faith, and began to tell others about Jesus. Then a few months past, I went to the Head of Sixth Form's office to print out my past papers, as I waited, that's when I was threatened with exclusion. This is not the only time that happened. I was threatened twice, by teachers. No kidding. But despite it all, I still cling on to Christ. I used to be scared of others will say or do to me, but now I'm not.
To all Christians reading this, don't ever be ashamed of who you are, a child of God. (1 Peter 2:9). The enemy can use anything, even human beings to try and wear you down, intimidate you, and at worst, drive you back to the world. The Bible says Resit the devil and he will flee from you. Tell your problems that u have a big God. Tell the enemy "Get thee behind me, I will serve my God!"
So here's a short story-line:
Boy#1: *laughing to scorn* Just look at her. Another one of those Jesus freaks.
Boy#2: Oh her? *laughs out of mockery* She's a freak alright
Girl#1: *pointing* You girl are gonna be nobody in life! HA HA
Girl#2: *laughing* Go back to where you belong, you hate spreader.
Adult: You are a delusion!! *evil laughs*
Girl with the Bible: Lord, forgive them. They don't know what they are doing. I know I have a future ahead of me. And Lord, despite what other may do to me, I will serve you with every breath that I take. *putting a determined face on* And I am not, and never will be ashamed of the Gospel of Christ, no matter what the enemy throws at me.
NOTES:
Here's my story. At the age of 16, I decided to stop hiding my faith, and began to tell others about Jesus. Then a few months past, I went to the Head of Sixth Form's office to print out my past papers, as I waited, that's when I was threatened with exclusion. This is not the only time that happened. I was threatened twice, by teachers. No kidding. But despite it all, I still cling on to Christ. I used to be scared of others will say or do to me, but now I'm not.
To all Christians reading this, don't ever be ashamed of who you are, a child of God. (1 Peter 2:9). The enemy can use anything, even human beings to try and wear you down, intimidate you, and at worst, drive you back to the world. The Bible says Resit the devil and he will flee from you. Tell your problems that u have a big God. Tell the enemy "Get thee behind me, I will serve my God!"
Who executes justice for the oppressed, Who gives food to the hungry. The Lord gives freedom to the prisoners. --Psalm 146:7
© Copyright 2013 Arianna Schaffer ( submitted to the Patch)
In my neighbourhood, if you can call it that, there is this tennis court. They no longer keep to the rules hanging on the fence. It is no longer enforced because, they no longer use it as a tennis court. You walk inside, and immediately feel imprisoned. If you walk to the very back, you see the gate there is locked, chained to never open. The tennis court is run down completely. There are cracks all over the asphalt and bits out of the metal fence have been torn, leaving a gaping hole in it. The point to my story here is simple; If the gate is closed, you have the brief illusion that you are locked out with no escape. Had you gone closer to the gate which is now closed shut, you would notice that the lock is dangling on the fencing of the gate and the handle is broken.
I thought of a way this could be applied to life. You see, you are born into a “run down” world, correct? Picture yourself being born in a fenced area, similar to this tennis court. You grow up and when you look out of the gate, you see darkness. You might catch a few glimpses of trees here and there, but for the most part, you’re locked from anything beautiful. A man comes to the gate he destroys the chains on the door while you were sleeping, locks the lock on the fence and breaks the latch for the fence. When he leaves, you wake up, but you never look at the gate, you pace in the court in a continual restless pattern. Then you daydream of a better world. One day, the same man comes to the gate, standing in front of it he smiles and asks, “Why do you remain in this court?”
You look back at him like he was insane, and you answer, “Because, I’m a prisoner.”
He smiles and nudges the gate open, extending a hand to you he says, “Follow me.”
You stare at him for a moment and see the scars on his hands. Finally, will you take his hand? Will you take his hand and be led outside? The darkness will fade away, and you will find a world in need and a world of love. You just have to open the gate, and step out of the court!